Crush (Elemental Hearts, #3)

by Morgan, Jayelle

  She’d see her safe in bed and tucked in before she left.

  She helped her through her bedtime routine and then helped her in bed.

  As she told her mom about the extra blankets folded at the foot of the bed, with little hope of her remembering, there was a knock on the door.

  “Come in,” Jade said, expecting a nurse roused to action by the commotion they were causing.

  But the door opened slowly, hesitantly, and standing there taking up the entire doorway... was Micah.

  She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t seem to pick her jaw up off the floor and close her mouth, her hands frozen on the edge of her mom’s blankets.

  “Jade,” he said, nodding to her.

  “I’ll be out in just a minute,” she finally murmured.

  He nodded and shut the door, and she stood there another moment, trying to get her brain to engage, to try to calm her heart from beating her to death from the inside out.

  “It’s not bedtime. I haven’t even had my breakfast yet.”

  “Mom. Mrs. McNally. It’s nine o’clock p.m. It’s evening, not morning.”

  “No,” she said, voice raising, tugging the blankets out of Jade’s hands and sitting up. “I just woke up a little bit ago. I’m going to have my breakfast.”

  “You can probably have a snack if you’re hungry, but the cafeteria is closed.”

  “I can make my own.”

  They didn’t put cooking appliances in a dementia patient’s room. That was asking for a disaster.

  “Let me go get you something to eat,” Jade begged, her hand on her mom’s arm.

  Her mom jerked away from her touch. “No, I don’t need help. I can do it. I’m not—”

  There was a knock on the door again, and Micah leaned his head around the corner. She clenched her eyes and her teeth shut at his intrusion. “I just need a few more minutes, she’s having trouble. Wait outside, please.”

  “I know. I wanted to see if I can try something? See if I can help?”

  Before she could agree or disagree, before she could tell him it really wasn’t a good idea, to tell him he should leave and come back some other time, he stepped around the doorway and spoke.

  But not to her, to her mom.

  “You see, there’s this baby that gets upset sometimes,” Micah said, voice low and rumbling. “Really upset. His name is Jackson. No one can seem to help once he gets going.”

  Her mom had stopped fighting her and seemed to be listening intently to what he was saying. Not freaking out over the appearance of a huge, intimidating stranger with braids and tattoos the way she thought she might. Jade backed up and sat in the chair by the window, just exhausted enough to see how this played out instead of insisting he leave and let her handle it.

  “When he gets like that, I’m the only one who can calm him down. I know a special song.” Micah sat gingerly in the chair beside the bed. “Would you like to hear that special song?”

  “I think I would.” Her mother smoothed her hands over the blanket, already so much calmer than before, simply by being distracted from the issue at hand. She would have to remember that tactic in the future. But she still had that pinch between her brows that said things could get bad again, very quickly. Jade held her breath.

  And let it go in a rush when he started singing.

  Right then is when she forgave him. Right then was when she loved him again, loved him a hundred times over, for singing to her mother.

  He was hunched over, looking at the floor, hands clasped on his knees. But the notes he sang were so deep and clear and beautiful, that once again, it brought her to tears. Overwhelmed, she rested her fist against her lips.

  The song started out slow and quiet, swelled in the middle, and then ended on a low, almost whispered rumble. It was in a language she didn’t speak, didn’t recognize. Probably Russian.

  But she understood the meaning all the same. Peace, serenity, calm. Love.

  With the last note still lingering in the air, she wiped the moisture from her lashes. Her mom was laying comfortably back against her pillows, eyes closed and a small smile on her face.

  As quietly as she was able, she got up and turned off the lights, leaving one on so her mom could see if she woke during the night.

  Micah took the hint and stood, and with a nod to her, left the room quieter than she’d ever thought a man his size could.

  She tucked her mother in, kissed her cheek, her mind with the man outside the door. As she pulled back and started to leave, her mom gently grabbed her hand.

  Jade turned back to her.

  “He’s the man you’re seeing?” she asked, sleepy smile on her face.

  Stunned at her sudden lucidity, stunned her mom remembered their conversation despite her state when Jade last visited, she nodded.

  “I like him.”

  Jade smiled, swallowed, blinked back tears. “Me too.”

  “He reminds me of your father, just a little bit, in the eyes. Kind eyes.”

  Jade nodded, remembering. Seeing the similarity now.

  “Jade, sweety, when you leave, could you please send your dad in? I want to say good night.”

  Her chest and throat constricted, her eyes instantly filling again with hot tears. If only she could. “He’s still on the mountain, but he’ll be back soon. He said to tell you he loves you.”

  Her mom smiled again, eyes closed, so close to sleep. “Okay. Love you both.”

  “Love you, too, Momma. Good night.”

  Her mother didn’t answer, breath already smoothing out.

  She wished she could spend more time with her now that she was calm and somewhat lucid, but it was so nice for her mom to ‘see’ her before she left.

  She had Micah to thank for that.

  Jade walked through the door, shutting it quietly behind her, her heart like a tattered flag. Frayed, ragged, but flying at the same time.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  MICAH STOOD BY HIS SUV, hands deep in his pockets, waiting for Jade. She was at the nurse’s station, signing out. He could see her through the glass doors as she talked to a nurse. She looked tired. A deeper kind of tired than sleep could fix.

  The same kind of tired he’d felt since she left the base.

  He would tell her everything, open himself up to her, give her all the power and let her know how he felt. And he was terrified.

  More scared than he’d been facing a hundred Chaolt, more fearful than before the landslide overtook him. The only thing that had scared him more was the thought of losing Jade to either of those things.

  Compared to that, this was nothing, right?

  He pushed his hair back with both hands as she walked through the doors. She wasn’t smiling, but she didn’t look pissed, either. Didn’t look frightened or overwhelmed like the last time he’d seen her. He would take that as a good sign.

  “Hi, Micah,” she said as she walked up to him, wrapping her coat and her arms around her waist. “Thank you for that. For helping my mom.”

  He nodded, and then his promise to himself to open up prodded him. “You’re welcome,” he murmured, and then cleared his throat. “It was the least I could do.”

  He owed her, or at least it felt like he did.

  Jade was staring at him, eyes traveling over his face, but he couldn’t tell what she was thinking.

  “I’m surprised to see you,” she said after a minute.

  Micah breathed in the chilly air, and let it out slowly. How could he have ever let her go? How could he have not told her how important she was to him?

  It didn’t matter, because he would to fix it. To say all of it, so she would know. A calm was stealing through him about it now. But first...

  “I have something for you.”

  “You do?”

  Her surprise was beautiful, and sad, because she shouldn’t be surprised that he would give her gifts. But she was, and that was another thing he needed to fix. They hadn’t had a normal relationship up on the mountain, and he was g
oing to try to fix that with Levi and Ajax as his inspiration.

  “Yeah.”

  He opened the hatch on the SUV, flooding the interior with light. Curiosity lit up her face as she chewed her lip, staring at the newspaper-and-bubble-wrapped bundles in the shallow boxes. She would know they were minerals, but he was still excited for her to see what they were, to realize what they meant. Especially after meeting the tragic, beautiful woman who was her mother.

  That was just a glimpse of what Jade had been through to care for her mother, he knew. Surely this would help them both.

  He grabbed one of the bundles and unwrapped it, plucked the crystal cluster out, and sat it in Jade’s palm.

  Her eyes widened and her mouth opened, and he there was lust and awe in her eyes.

  “This is mine?” She flashed a glance at him, and all that covetousness directed at him made him swallow hard. He wanted her to look at him like that again.

  He nodded.

  “Where did you get it? I thought they would all be destroyed by the collapse?”

  “They were. I found these in a different spot.” On a different peak, that he hoped he’d get the chance to show her.

  She turned to look at the rest of the boxes. “Are they all like this?”

  Her voice was raspy with shock, her eyes wide, and he felt a smile creeping across his face. “Some are better.”

  “Better?” Jade squeaked, her hand reaching out to touch one of the bigger wrapped bundles. But then she pulled her hand back and looked at him. “Why?”

  She wasn’t asking why some were better, she was the asking the big why. Why he was here, giving these to her, after the way things had ended.

  Time to step up, Big Guy.

  Micah took a deep breath, a bit of nerves trying to sneak into the calm, and started talking.

  “They’re so you can take care of your mother, the way you wanted. Since all your hard work was ruined by the Chaolt situation. By me.”

  Her mouth opened but he couldn’t let her interrupt, not yet, or it would be twice as difficult for him to get going again.

  “I’m sorry I took so long to come find you. It just took me awhile to figure out how I could make up for...” he gestured in the direction of the mountain, hidden in the darkness, “Everything.” He wasn’t done, not nearly, but the flow of words seem to get pinched off.

  Jade was quiet, cradling the crystal cluster close to her stomach. She cocked her head.

  “You don’t need to make up for anything, Micah.” His brows went up. “It took me a while to figure that out.” Her smile was self-depreciating and bittersweet. “You did what you had to do, and I understand that now. You did what you had to do for the war, and you saved my life, and saved everyone here.”

  She looked at the crystals in her hands. “But this, this is too much. Maybe I could take one or two to help with bills...” She shook her head and held the cluster back out to him. “But these belong in a museum.”

  He used his hands to curl hers back around the huge gemstone. “We can go dig up more to put in a museum. Use these to take care of your mother.”

  She glanced up at him again. “More? There are more in this good of condition?”

  “When you don’t need tools to move the earth,” he said, smiling, “they all come up in that condition.” And he’d be happy to bring them all up for her, give her every crystal that sang beneath the dirt, because she was the only one that made him feel this way.

  Surprised understanding crossed her face. “Yes, I guess that’s true.” Even though she gave a little laugh, her words were thicker, her eyes shinier. “Thank you. I’m flabbergasted.”

  But he didn’t want her to cry, he wanted her to be happy.

  Micah sat on the bumper, making the springs and frame groan under his weight, but she shouldn’t have to keep craning her neck to look at him. And maybe he needed to sit, just a little, because he was about to crack himself open for her.

  “Jade...” he started, looking at her feet, but then stopped, hands clenching in frustration. What should he say? He’d never been good at words.

  More of her entered his field of vision as she stepped closer. He looked at her, the pair of them eye to eye now. She leaned past him and sat the crystals down in a box, and then put her hands on his shoulders.

  He held her gaze, waiting.

  “Thank you,” she said, sliding her arms around him until her chin was on his shoulder. “For everything.” He wrapped his arms around her, holding her gently, and sighed, the tension leaving him. It felt so good to have her in his arms. He couldn’t—wouldn’t—let her go again.

  “Jade, there’s more I need to tell you.”

  “Okay,” she mumbled into his shoulder.

  Jade never pried, never pushed, never tried to force words out of him, and like every time before, that made it easier to be open with her, to be open to her.

  “I want you to know I don’t have any expectations of how this will go. The gems are yours no matter what. They’re not a bribe. I don’t want anything in return, I just want... just want you to know that. But I wanted a chance to explain what happened on the mountain, if that’s okay.” She nodded against him. “The boy, the one who...”

  Jade tensed, but when she would have pulled back, he tightened his arms, just a little.

  “Wait, please.” It was easier this way, instead of face to face. He had to get it all out, and then if she still wanted to go... he’d let her. She relaxed again in his arms, but swallowed loudly in the space of his pause. She knew which boy.

  “There was a boy,” he restarted, “On the mountain. A young man I had tried to save a few months ago, but the Chaolt took him through the portal. They changed him, and then they sent him back here.” Micah looked down at his hands behind Jade’s back. “He’s the reason the enemy came after you. I’m the reason, because I let him go back through the portal again instead of killing him.”

  “Because of Tokoni.”

  She pulled back to meet his eyes, and he let her this time, taking a deep breath. He nodded. She understood, because he’d told her his story, she’d shared his pain. “The story wasn’t a lie. None of it.” He met her eyes again, wanted her to know he was sincere. “Everything was real.”

  “Everything?”

  The look of pained hope on her face cut into him like glass, but also fed the hope inside of him.

  “You know, on the mountain, after the landslide...” He saw the memory darken her eyes, and tightened his arms around her. “I felt you.”

  Jade’s words were soft, solemn. “I felt you, too. That’s how we found you.”

  “Do you know why?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “I assume because we’re both Earth?” She gave him a tiny smile and shook her head again, like she couldn’t quite believe what she was saying.

  “That has a little to do with it. At least it did at first.” That first day they were at camp together, she’d said she’d sensed him nearby. Had the bond been there even then? “But it’s because we have an alo conexio.” He looked at her again as she tipped her head to the side in question. “It’s a special bond between Elementals, that allows us to share powers. Because of that bond, you sent me power which enabled me to come back.” He looked down, remembering the heavy darkness, and then the light, and Tokoni. He would have died if it weren’t for her.

  Not that he cared about his life so much. He’d die a thousand deaths to keep her safe. But it was their bond that allowed him to return to life, to return to her. He couldn’t believe he’d almost squandered his second chance by letting her leave without telling her how he felt. Never again. He was not leaving tonight without telling her.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything at base to stop you from leaving, that I let you leave believing...” The words stopped and he had to take a deep breath, because he hadn’t said the most important part yet. “Jade, I’m completely in love with you, and I’m sorry—”

  His words were cut off by the feel
ing of warm lips on his neck, and his whole body tightened.

  “I’m in love with you, too,” Jade mumbled against his skin.

  “What?”

  This time when she pulled back, he let his arms slowly loosen until she was standing facing him, her arms still on his shoulders, eyes on his.

  “You’re mystical and magical, and powerful, and you have this huge, important job to do here—”

  “I know we’re different—” he said, looking off to the side, heartbeat tripping.

  “That doesn’t matter to me,” Jade said in a rush, eyes wet. Clasping one of his hands in her two tiny ones, she held it against her chest. “There may not be anyone else like you in the world, Micah. But no one else will do. I’m in love with you, too.”

  He used the hand clasped in hers to pull her closer and put his forehead against hers, eyes closed. Overwhelmed, he slowly pressed his lips to hers. She still loved him.

  Sniffling, she said, “Just, maybe, work on that whole telling-people thing, okay? This has been one of the most miserable weeks of my life.”

  He nodded, hands and lips in her hair. He would work on it.

  “So what now?” she asked, pulling back.

  “I have a few days off. If you want, maybe I can help you liquidate these crystals. I know a guy who doesn’t ask questions.”

  “Okay. But I mean what about now? Tonight?”

  He gave her a small smile. “Honestly, I did not think that far ahead.”

  “Would you like to come to my place? You could follow me there.”

  “Yeah, sure. I could follow you to drop of the gems—”

  She picked up his hand again. “Not to drop of the gems, Micah. To stay. At least until you have to go back to base.”

  He couldn’t stop his full smile then. “Yeah, okay.” But then it faltered. “We have much to discuss.”

  Jade inched closer, twining one hand around his back and one hand in his hair. Lips brushing his, she whispered, “That can wait until morning.”

  And then she gave him a kiss hot enough to ensure he would follow her anywhere.