The Disgraced Lords Series 3-Book Bundle

by Bronwen Evans

  “At least you can fix your situation. I fear I’ll be paying for mine all my life.” The guilt in Sebastian’s voice slammed itself forcefully into him from across the table.

  Christian could read it in his friend’s eyes: Sebastian was in deep trouble. “What has happened?”

  “I too left England in rather a hurry.”

  “Why?”

  Sebastian looked at him, his face a mask of sorrow. Christian knew that whatever was coming wasn’t good.

  Sebastian slugged back more alcohol as if it would wash his past actions clean. “A duel … a duel that went horribly wrong,” Sebastian said, each word biting and clipped, as though forced between clenched teeth.

  Christian looked at his friend. Just about every Libertine Scholar had been involved in a duel at one time or another, usually over women. But among most gentlemen duels were fought to draw first blood only, and were fought not to kill the opponent but to gain satisfaction.

  “I don’t understand. You would never shoot to kill.”

  Sebastian shrugged. “I didn’t.” He ran a hand over his eyes. “It all happened so fast. It was Baron Larkwell. I thought I’d aimed over his right shoulder, but he went down like a shot stag. The doctor informed me he was dead, and Hadley, as my second, told me to run. So I slipped out of England quietly, and I’m waiting on Hadley’s note to let me know when it may be safe, if ever, to return.”

  “Christ.” Christian was left speechless. He signaled to the barmaid they both needed another drink. Finally he uttered, “I don’t believe this. What a pair we make.”

  Sebastian thumped his refilled tumbler on the table. “I did not mean to kill Doogie Hennessy. You know me; I’m the best shot in England. How could I have not missed?” Sebastian’s voice, low and strained, spoke of his inner pain at such an act, for it was illegal to duel to the death in England, and certainly frowned upon within society. Christian knew exactly what a man’s death did to your soul, especially over something as foolish as a woman whom Sebastian would have already forgotten by now.

  “This may be paradise, with the glorious weather and abundant willing females, but I can’t end my days in Jamaica. I’ve responsibilities in England. Responsibilities that include my estate and the Coldhurst riches, both of which my odious cousin is itching to get his hands on.” He gave a wan smile. “Hadley’s trying to get Prinny to issue a pardon. He’s positioning that I would never have shot to kill, and that perhaps Doogie may have deliberately stepped into the line of fire. But in my absence, I’m worried about my sisters. They are now defenseless. I can’t stay away too much longer.”

  “Hadley will take care of them.” Lord Hadley Fullerton was the Duke of Claymore’s younger brother, and the youngest member of the Libertine Scholars.

  Sebastian gave a grim smile. “That’s what worries me. If it weren’t for my promise to Hadley to wait until he sends for me, I’d be tempted to sail back with you.”

  Christian sat motionless, keeping his features blank. He was a selfish bastard. The last thing he wanted on board ship with himself and Sarah was the handsome Sebastian Hawkestone, the Marquis of Coldhurst. Carefully he said, “Sisters are off-limits. Even the Libertine Scholars have some standards and decency. My advice would be to wait for Hadley.”

  His words were cut off by an ear-piercing squeal.

  “Sebastian, my gorgeous man, where have you been?” A petite serving wench threw herself onto Sebastian’s lap, smothering him with kisses.

  She was small in height and stature except for her ample bosom. How she didn’t topple forward when standing, Christian didn’t know.

  The greeting was lavish and long. Sebastian took her lips in a kiss that stirred every man watching, including himself.

  When they finally came up for air, Sebastian huskily said, “Susie, my sweet, I’m happy to see you.”

  She wiggled in Sebastian’s lap. “I can feel that, my lusty lord.” She shoved her barely concealed breasts into Sebastian’s eager face. “I’ve got a break coming up.” She nodded her head toward the stairs and the bedroom waiting to be romped in.

  Christian’s body gave a twinge at the idea of a pleasant hour of unbridled relief. He envied Sebastian the opportunity. Given Sarah’s reluctance to become his lover, and the long voyage ahead, the temptation to indulge in some bed sport stirred within him.

  “How accommodating, my dear, but do you have a friend for Lord Markham? It would be rude of me to desert him. Christian has only just arrived in Kingston.”

  Susie turned toward Christian, and her mouth began to widen into a saucy smile—that is, until he turned his head and his full profile came into view. Suddenly her smile wavered and she murmured embarrassedly, “I’m—I’m not sure if Kitty’s free.”

  Sebastian hadn’t seen her expression. He reached around from behind her and cupped each of her breasts, rolling her hardened nipples between his fingers. “Then I’ll simply have to share. Don’t worry my sweet, Christian and I have shared before, and the woman concerned was most appreciative.”

  Susie’s face flooded with alarm. She made to rise from Sebastian’s lap.

  Christian cleared his throat, trying to ignore the humiliating heat sweeping his face. “It’s quite all right, Sebastian. I’m happy to stretch my sea legs for a while. Don’t let me stop you.”

  The relief on Susie’s face nailed the humiliation into his skin like a hammer on a coffin lid. Any and all desire died completely.

  He watched Sebastian begin to frown as he looked quizzically at Christian and then toward Susie. It took all of a few seconds for Sebastian to ascertain her reluctance and the reason for it. Shock replaced his puzzled stare, and then embarrassment, embarrassment for Christian.

  With a sweep of his arms, he removed Susie from his lap and placed her on her feet. With sangfroid, Sebastian quietly said, “Well then, perhaps another day, when I no longer have guests. Come, Christian, let’s hire a couple of steeds and explore the coast on our way back to my villa. My carriage will collect your luggage later.”

  They didn’t speak again until they reached the villa.

  Roaring Pavilions stood on a small clifftop that jutted out into the sea, fifteen miles from Kingston. It was strategically positioned so that it had two private coves, one either side of the main house.

  The homestead was two stories high, and the gleaming white painted wood reflected the glare of the baking sun. It looked like a jewel, its setting the lush gardens containing plants in every color of the rainbow. Beyond the lawn was the deep cerulean blue of the sea, its waters glittering like topaz in the sunshine.

  It truly was paradise. If you had to hide out, there could be no better place.

  The horses were handed to the young Negro groom.

  To defuse the tension, Sebastian said, “Let’s head straight to the beach for a swim. Wash the heat off.” Without waiting for a reply, he led the way down the shell-covered path, through the tall coconut trees and jasmine-scented flowers, and toward the beach. As they approached the point where the white sandy paths branched off in different directions, leading to two separate coves, they stopped and stared at the picture-perfect scene on the beach at the bottom of the left-hand path.

  Sarah, unaware that the men had arrived earlier than anticipated, had stripped down to her white linen shift. To both men it was obvious she was naked beneath.

  Her hair was wet from a swim. It hung glistening down her back, the color darker now that it was wet, reminding Christian of champagne. She was watching Lily swim. A bright pink flower was tucked behind one ear, and when she bent to pick up a shell, the nearly transparent linen outlined her buttocks, giving an almost clear view of the delights a man would find there.

  God, she was beautiful. Christian had never wanted a woman more. His erection was instant and urgent.

  The intake of breath from both men was audible.

  Sebastian gave a long, appreciative whistle. “That’s too much of a temptation for me.” He started to turn toward the path
to go down to the beach.

  Christian’s arm shot out to stop him.

  “Please—don’t.”

  Sebastian’s face broke into a knowing grin. “I never had any intention of invading their privacy.” He shot his friend a sarcastic look. “Just Lily’s governess, indeed! I knew there was more to it.” He glanced back at Sarah, a siren of the sea frolicking in paradise. “I envy you. It’s not often I’ve wanted a fellow Libertine Scholar’s lover.”

  “She’s not my lover—yet. But I’d appreciate time to win her.” His words cost him, cost him dearly. His pride was stripped bare and he was almost weeping with impotence. How could he compete against Sebastian? His friend was a wealthy gentleman too, like him, but Sebastian was still handsome. Women fell at his feet, as if worshiping a god. If Sebastian wanted Sarah, no doubt he could have her. They both knew it.

  He hated the desperation he heard in his voice. “You saw what happened at the tavern. You have no idea what it’s like to have a woman look at you with revulsion.”

  “Don’t let one silly barmaid taint your thinking.”

  “It’s not one silly barmaid. Unlike you, now if I want sex I have to pay for it. Pay for a woman who then lies beneath me unresponsive until I finish. Usually I ensure I’m so drunk that her reluctance doesn’t bother me. Hence why the night of the debacle at the Honey Pot is so unclear.”

  Sebastian appeared to be trying to wipe the look of pity off his face. He said softly, “I’m sorry. Women are fickle creatures. We have always known that. That is why we don’t take them seriously.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “What’s different about Mrs. Cooper?”

  Blast Sebastian’s uncanny ability to read people. Christian let out the breath he’d not realized he was holding until then. “She’s the first woman since Waterloo who looks at me as if I’d never been injured in the war. She doesn’t appear to mind the burns.” He proceeded to tell Sebastian about her visit to his room the first night they met. “She let me kiss her and didn’t recoil in disgust. There is definitely an attraction there, but her husband treated her cruelly and he frightened her badly. I don’t know what he did, but she’s scared of intimacy. I want—no, I need—the chance to heal her.”

  Sebastian stood silently watching Sarah on the beach below. Finally he uttered quietly, “So she can heal you?”

  “That’s very perceptive of you, my friend. Maybe she and I can heal each other.”

  Sebastian nodded. Christian pressed on. “You can have any woman you choose. Just don’t choose Sarah. Is that too much to ask?”

  Sebastian turned his back on the beauty below and began making his way down to the cove on the right. “I was never serious in my intention to seduce her. I merely wanted to stoke the fire, so to speak, and get you to admit your relationship. All this pious talk of her being an employee, indeed! I knew as soon as I saw her. She’s far too young to have had any relevant experience.” He looked back over his shoulder. “I hope she turns out to be a terrible governess, and then it won’t matter when you grow tired of her as your mistress. You can simply fire her.”

  “Sometimes I forget what a cold-hearted bastard you are.” Sebastian’s parents had been a faithless pair. Jealousy and heated arguments filled the Coldhurst home. Both his mother and his father took numerous lovers. Christian knew Sebastian wondered if his father was his blood father at all. Once Sebastian’s father died, his mother’s affairs grew worse. The last straw was when Sebastian caught his mother in bed with her groom. Sebastian had been relieved when she died a few years ago.

  Since then he’d held all women in low regard. They were merely instruments he played for his pleasure.

  Christian followed him, his relief at Sebastian’s disinterest in Sarah tempered by annoyance. “Just because I may end the affair doesn’t mean I’d have to fire her. Sarah is remarkably well educated and could defeat any of us at chess.”

  “Hmmm … that’s interesting. Where is she from?”

  “Why?”

  “I’m sure I’ve met her somewhere before. I’ll remember eventually.”

  Christian stilled in his task of removing his boots. “I doubt it. If any one of us had spied such beauty before, a challenge would have been laid down. You’d have already seduced her.”

  Sebastian pulled his shirt over his head. “Maybe she has a sister I’ve woken up with before.”

  “Perhaps … I haven’t asked about her family in any detail, but I have a funny feeling she’s an only child—well, only in terms of who she believes her father to be.”

  “Believes? This is getting interesting.”

  “Have you ever visited, for any length of time, with the Duke of Hastings?”

  “No. Only a ball here and there.”

  “Sarah grew up in his household. Her father is the Duke’s gardener, and she was educated with the Duke’s daughter,” he said with a touch of derision.

  Sebastian stopped undressing. “You think she’s the Duke’s by-blow?”

  “She certainly has the bone structure, speech, breeding, and intelligence of our class. In fact, if I didn’t know better, I’d think she was gentry.”

  Sebastian’s eyes narrowed and his mouth opened, then closed. “Hmmm … I wonder …”

  “What?”

  Sebastian, lost in thought, ignored his question. “Sarah is all yours. I hope you will remember my noble sacrifice. Besides, the minute I saw her on your ship, saw how territorial you were about her, I knew there was more to the relationship. I’ve never seen you so possessive over a woman.”

  “People change; things occur that alter your life irrevocably. I’m not the same man I was.”

  “That’s where you are wrong. You may have changed on the outside. We all do. Age changes us all. We cannot escape the ravages of time. You’ve changed slightly earlier and differently.” Sebastian’s face sobered. “But you are still the man I’ve known most of my life—honorable, kind, loyal, and proud. No burns can take away who you are inside, unless you let them. If you slink around ashamed of the injuries you have received fighting for king and country, then others will perceive you that way too.” Sebastian’s gaze ran over Christian’s bared torso. “I can see what Sarah saw in you when she came to your room that night. You’re still a man in his prime, muscled and healthy. Walk tall, defy all the stares, and if you forget the burns, others will too. They will only see them if you focus on them.” He smiled and patted Christian on the back. “Give them something else to focus on and they will do so. Be the Christian of old. No woman could resist you then, and I bet with a new attitude, they won’t once again.”

  “You make it sound so simple.”

  “It is. There is nothing wrong with your mind or your cock—two very effective weapons when dealing with the fairer yet more vicious sex.” Sebastian shrugged. “You may just have to work harder than you’re used to. So women no longer fall at your feet. But honestly, sometimes the hunt can be more invigorating than an easy conquest.” He grinned. “If you want Sarah Cooper, go and get her. That’s what the Christian of old would have done. Nothing would have stopped him.”

  “I was pretty skilled at seduction, and very successful too.”

  “Not as successful as me.” With that Sebastian turned and ran into the sea, calling over his shoulder, “The swim will do your damaged shoulder some good. I noticed you favored your left arm on the ride home.”

  Christian stood naked on the beautiful beach and contemplated Sebastian’s sound advice. He looked down at his body and surveyed himself unbiasedly. Sebastian was right. He was a man still in his prime—fit, muscular, and well endowed enough to have received no complaints.

  He had been living like a victim, feeling sorry for all he had lost, when he still had so much that was appealing. He looked around him at this paradise on earth. What a fool he’d been.

  He was alive! He could still feel the sun on his face, see the wonder of nature—and experience passion and love, if he worked for it.

  He’d struggled t
hrough torturous pain, and for what? Only to live half a life? How had he let himself forget how good being a part of this world could be?

  He raced for the inviting, vivid blue sea, his spirits lifting. He was alive, and God damn it, he was determined to never forget that fact ever again. Once he’d finished his swim, he would begin his campaign for Sarah Cooper.

  She too had been hurt. She was intending to hide herself at his estate, giving up on a life of happiness. She had forgotten what joy there was in family, friends … He would give the joy of being a part of this world back to her. He’d make her understand her life wasn’t over, and that she couldn’t hide from passion, pleasure, and happiness.

  She deserved to be happy.

  As he dived under a wave and struck out to swim along the shoreline, the world, all of a sudden, became a more inviting place.

  Chapter Nine

  Christian was disappointed and angry that Sarah chose not to join them for dinner, but it did give him the opportunity to ask for Sebastian’s help.

  They’d retired to the library for a glass or two of whiskey and a cheroot. The doors out onto the tropical garden were open, and the humid, humming darkness was alive with lit lanterns.

  “How long do you intend to stay in Jamaica, Christian? I have a favor to ask of you before you sail home,” Sebastian said as he sauntered over to the decanter to refill their glasses.

  Christian frowned. “I was wondering why you’d sent for me.”

  “I want you to take two letters to London for me, one to Doogie’s mother and the other to my bank. I’d like them hand-delivered. I don’t trust anyone but a friend with this task. I’ve made some financial arrangements for Doogie’s family. I know they were expecting him to make a good match.”

  “Doogie has two younger brothers. The family won’t be left destitute.”