by Alice Moore
“I know you were in a car accident and a coma for three months. That’s all for sure- I didn’t want to put too much stock in anything.” Left alone to look over the menu, I turned my attention to it while Roark sighed. Over the rim, I watched him frown slightly, and his brows furrowed deeply as he picked up his own menu.
“It’s definitely been a trial. I lost my memories of the five years prior to the accident.” Tilting my head, I held my breath in tight lungs as that tiny bit of information zinged through me. Across the table, Roark gave me a sort of grimace, and he shook his head at a question I didn’t even realize I had silently asked. “I regained most of my memories- a lot of my business empire and stuff. But, when I woke up, I couldn’t remember being married, the ensuing separation, and when I started the divorce proceedings.”
“You never mentioned you were married…” Speaking slowly, it was my turn to frown as guilt and shame flittered weakly across Roark’s expression. My chest tightened, and my abdomen fluttered between butterflies and betrayal.
I couldn’t believe that the ‘other woman’ was a home wrecker, but that didn’t make me feel any better about the situation.
“No. From what I’m told, my marriage was insanely toxic. A few friends told me that during my separation, I went on a few first dates with a few different women- you included. Those dates were what made me make the decision to get a divorce. Not to say you were the defining factor, Ally…” Discomfort settled in my gut, and I nodded quietly as I struggled to process what Roark was saying. His hand wrapped around mine to squeeze, and I blinked at him as the action brought me out of my mind. “I apologize. It’s hard to explain when I don’t remember, but I wanted you to know.”
“Ehm- w- well… that’s very thoughtful… I’m kind of glad now you declined to sleep with me…” My muttering wasn’t low enough to be missed, and Roark’s brows shot up. Clenching my jaw, my face flamed at the surprise that he showed. “You said you wouldn’t because you liked me and didn’t want to mess it up. That was on our first date. Then, on our second date, you were convinced you made a mistake by saying ‘no’, but you wouldn’t back out of it. I managed to convince you to come to my apartment on our third date, and afterward, you said work was about to swamp you- but I’m guessing that was a lie.”
“Oh- probably… My lawyer told me that I filed for divorce four days later… but, for what it’s worth, I don’t think that declining had anything to do with my marriage, Ally. That was the truth.” Letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, I smiled small as my body temperature began to drop. Releasing my hand, Roark smiled back before clearing his throat softly. “I don’t remember the first two… but I do remember you crying over a pizza crust while we were watching that movie. I don’t know why that’s what I remember. When I saw you yesterday, that was what came to mind even before your name.”
“I would’ve cried even without the wine. That movie always gets me.” Giggling at the memory, I turned my eyes back to my menu to scan the page to distract me from what Roark had revealed. The dishes were eclectic; anything that went well with wine was on display. “The last time we were here was my first date since my ex of six years broke up with me. You and I were pretty awkward, and I was surprised when you asked me on a second date.”
“What happened, if you don’t mind my asking?” An intense flashback hit me, and I sucked in a sharp breath at his smooth, deep voice enveloped me. Roark had asked the same question in the exact same tone on our first date, and I glanced over my menu to find him staring at me with intense, bright eyes.
“We just… fell out, I guess. I don’t really know, but over time, we drifted apart. It was fairly amicable, but I’d been with him since my freshman year of high school. Dating as an adult was difficult- is difficult. I took this job at Wells because everyone I knew was trying to hook me up with their friend or cousin or whatever.” Shrugging my shoulder, I licked my lips as I eyeballed the wine selection absently. “I never thought anything was wrong with me, but it was hard to imagine myself dating someone else. It was like the idea of a proposal stressed us both out too much, and it ruined our relationship.”
“I had the opposite problem, I think.” Arching a brow in question, I tilted my head as I spied a particularly delicious sounding pasta dish. Across the table, Roark’s eyes dropped from me, and the weight of his full attention lifted from my shoulders. “Carla wanted to get married and never stopped talking about it. I remember dating her, and I guess, with foresight, it’s so clear that she was just manipulating me. My parents have a lot of money, and I was always set to inherit their businesses. Then, everything after about a week into our marriage is blank. My doctors said it was my brain’s way of protecting itself from stress, and with everything that happened during the divorce, I’m not too keen on trying to remember.”
My heart ached for Roark, and I hummed quietly. I’d seen the tabloid articles online depicting his nasty divorce, and I was disgusted to be the same gender as that woman.
“So, then, you’re still running your companies alright? I read that your father had taken over right after your accident, but that you were back at it fairly quickly.” Changing the subject easily, I set down my menu just as a waitress sauntered over with glasses of water and cutlery. She looked bored beyond belief, and my conversation with Roark paused as she took our orders.
I couldn’t help but smile when Roark ordered the same dish he’d had last time, and he requested the same bottle of wine.
“It’s weird how work for most people stresses them out, but not for me. I suppose it doesn’t help that a lot of it runs itself, and I don’t have to do much in terms of daily operation. But- to answer your question- yes. Most of my memories of the empire came back faster than I’d expected, and my father was around to fill in the blanks. This was actually the first time he felt comfortable leaving me, so he went to China with my mom to discuss the expansion of what he kept for himself.”
“I see.” My mind whirled at the story Roark spun, and I took a sip of my water to relieve my dried throat. “I didn’t know you had a sister, either. You two don’t have the same last name, right?”
“Ah- no. Julianne has my mother’s maiden name. She’s not meant for the spotlight, as I’m sure you’ve noticed.” Roark’s voice darkened, and something flashed behind his eyes. Just as quickly as it overtook him, the change had disappeared, and I scrunched up my nose. Keeping my lips tightly together, I decided to ignore it for now.
“So, you don’t remember anything surrounding your ex-wife, but most everything else is there? How does that work? I bet my brother would love to forget his ex-girlfriend.” Trying to keep the conversation going, I propped my elbow on the table and held my chin in my hand. I knew it wasn’t proper, but I didn’t really care.
I needed to avoid awkward pauses at all cost or I’d start fantasizing about Roark naked just like I did a year and a half ago.
Roark
My laughter was loud, and I couldn’t do much to get it under control. Clapping my hand to my chest, I glanced around absently and sucked in a sharp breath when no one seemed to care about my volume. The place was still essentially empty despite the fact that Ally and I had been here for two hours, and I sighed heavily.
She looked so much more mature than I remembered; the more she spoke, the more little bits and pieces of our first three dates came back to me. Watching her spear a piece of cold shrimp with her fork, I shook my head as I reached for my wine.
We were both drinking a little more than we should’ve, but I had a driver. No worries.
“You and your brother sound very close, Ally. He couldn’t have made it less embarrassing for you?” As terrible as it was that Ally’s brother was forced to be a man so young, it was even more hilarious how he dealt with her ‘girl problem’s. Grinning as she shook her head, I held back a laugh knowing I probably wouldn’t have done anything any differently.
When in doubt, get everything- at least, that was how I saw it.
“I’m not sure he could’ve. At least it wasn’t at school or anything, or I might’ve died.” Humor and embarrassment were both very evident in Ally’s voice, and I covered my mouth with my hand as she sighed wistfully. Our deserts were melting in front of us, but I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off her. “I miss him. He was arrested after shooting a woman that tried to throw her kids in front of a semi… not because he shot her, but because he owned and operated a gun two days before his permit arrived in the mail.”
“Oh God- how long did he get?” The sudden turn in the conversation was enough to give me whiplash, and I leaned in to watch a dark shadow fly across Ally’s expression. She had no father figure, so it made sense to me that her brother would do something like that. Of course, I didn’t know the circumstances, but if they only charged him with unlawful possession of a firearm, the woman couldn’t have died.
Talk about grotesque.
“Three years. That was about six months ago, and they’re already talking about putting him on probation. The woman is actually in the same prison for attempted murder, and the city didn’t charge Matt with assault because he was blatantly protecting children. He won’t let anyone see him- my mom, or our siblings, or me. Every so often we’ll get a voicemail from his lawyer.”
“He sounds like a great man.” Truth rang in my words, and Ally blushed as she took a long sip of her wine. “Do you want more wine?”
“Oh- no… I’m lucky I only live two blocks from here or I wouldn’t be able to get home.” Draining her glass with what I could only describe as elegance, she caught my gaze over the rim and held me captive. My heart pounded hard in my chest, and I licked my lips as a harsh wave of want rushed through my torso. This was exactly what had happened during our first date, if my memory served me; some bits were still dark, but most were there and all too revealing.
“… That’s your queue to ask me if you can walk me home, Roark.” Blinking hard, I straightened as Ally’s obvious hint penetrated my wine-fogged mind. Her eyes widened, glazed and begging, and I held my breath as I tried frantically to push a response out of my mouth.
“Can you walk me home?” Fuck. “I mean… can I walk you home…?” Holding my breath, I clenched and released my fists under the table with anxiety thrumming through my veins. Slowly she nodded, and I let my lungs deflate in a gust before I shuffled to pull my wallet from my back pocket. Furrowing my brows as I caught sight of my less-than-firm cheesecake slice, I glanced across the table just in time to watch her giggle.
“I’m sorry- we ordered dessert but didn’t eat it.” A sluggish, drunken smirk floated across my face at Ally’s apology, and I reached to touch the back of her hand. The contact was so light, I almost wondered if she felt it in her state, but a fraction of a second later, she stilled. Through half-lidded, wide eyes swimming with wine, she watched me pull out a few bills from my wallet.
I’d seen sultry before, but her look didn’t shoot straight to my cock like I thought it would. Proof that I’ve drank too much.
“You ready?” Slipping out of my seat, I helped Ally out of hers as she nodded silently. Her fingertips were rough when they slid along my palm, and I relished the absence of long, manicured nails. Glancing down as we walked slowly from the table, I admired her shortish fingernails the same color as her dress. The color popped against my palm, and my lip twitched at the simple fact that I was holding her hand.
I didn’t suspect Carla ever did something so plainly intimate, even when we were dating.
“Roark?” Humming as we left the restaurant, I faltered slightly before Ally took a sharp left down the sidewalk. My hand ached to wrap around her waist, and I shoved them in my pockets before she spoke up. “I wish I’d never taken this job, but… I’m glad I got to see you.”
“Maybe we could see each other again?” I couldn’t squash the hope in my voice, and I glanced over as Ally bopped her head in a nod. Her smile was soft, happy, when she cast it my way, and I sucked in a sharp breath to keep my accomplishment from suffocating me.
“I’d like that… you know- tonight doesn’t have to end. You could stay… we don’t have to do anything… but- I-… I want you to stay.” Tripping over her slurred words, Ally ducked her head to stare at her shoes, and I clenched my jaw. Regret slammed into my gut- a physical reminder of what happened the last time I’d said ‘no’ to her.
“Yeah- I’ll stay.” Tension slithered from my shoulders, and I kept my eyes in front of me. I had no idea where we were going, but that didn’t matter much when I had much more pressing concerns.
Why was I acting like a fucking idiot? If the question had an answer, I couldn’t see it in my intoxicated state. When Ally suddenly disappeared from my peripheral vision, I froze, twisting to watch in a slight panic as she wandered down a pathway to a three-story building. Dazedly I followed, and the alcohol circulating through my system caused me to stumble on the first step to the porch.
“Shit-“ Grumbling to myself, I stomped my feet slightly to catch my bearings before long, slender fingers wrapped themselves over my shoulders. Finally, the stiffness in my arm was relieved as it slung across Ally’s waist, and she giggled close to my face. Her sweet, wine-stained breath flowed across my cheek, and I turned into the smell as we shuffled across the porch to the front door.
“You can’t handle your liquor, huh, Roark?” Another giggle, and I tightened my grip on her reflexively while we crossed the threshold through an open screen door. “It’s a good thing I live on the first floor.”
“I don’t drink much.” Leaning on the wall when Ally pulled away, I reached to run my hand through my hair roughly while she fiddled with a door directly to our right. “I actually haven’t drank since waking up from my coma.”
A soft, fuzzy feeling tickled behind my eyes, and I rubbed them with my palm to shake my head wildly. I knew from stories that my alcohol tolerance was high; or it had been before my accident.
“It’s not much, but I didn’t want to get a bigger place.” Shuffling into her tiny apartment behind her, I shirked off my jacket and let it fall to the floor. Ally did the same, and I put both my hands on her shoulders to rub generously. She lost a few inches on the short walk to a futon-slash-bed, and the win coursing through my veins drove off any inhibition I had. Pushing her gently, I smiled at the surprised squeak she let out as she dropped onto the mattress.
Kicking off my shoes, I tackled the buttons on my shirt as Ally’s golden silhouette wiggled out of her dress. The idea of taking off my pants didn’t even pop into my head, and she held out her arms for me. Taking the precious moment in through watery eyes, I smiled wide, and my chest filled with something warm and heavy.
The alcohol I’d consumed weighed down my eyelids, and I took a deep, satisfied breath as I trapped Ally against me. Her bare legs tangled with mine, and she moaned softly against my neck. She fit perfectly against me, the fabric of her bra soft against my chest, and I savored the entirely non-sexual closeness we shared even while a deeper black crept up to engulf my consciousness.
Ally
Snuggling deeper into Roark’s chest, I focused on his heart beat against my chest as I floated between waking and sleeping. My hangover wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d expected, and I took a deep, lazy breath filled of his scent. His light dusting of chest hairs tickled my nose, and he let out a light snore that ruffled my bed head.
I didn’t have the energy to open my eyes, and I didn’t bother to try. Memories of the night before started off clear as they flashed in my mind’s eye, but they slowly became more and more muddied. With each breath Roark took, he let out a puff, and my lip twitched at how cute I found his snoring. Wrapped in warmth and comfort, I was in no rush to wake up; instead, I relished this small collection of seconds.
When Roark’s snoring stopped, his arms tightened around me, and I sighed even as he groaned and tensed against me.
“God- I forgot how bad a hangover feels.” Rough from sleep, Roark’s voice sent goosebumps down my arms and ac
ross my chest. Jerkily rolling onto his back, he hugged me to his side with one arm while the other flung over his face. Sliding my palm up his to his chin, I carefully pushed myself up to straddle his waist. Propping myself up with a foot on the floor, I smiled at the grimace staining his expression before opening my mouth.
“I have Advil.” Whispering softly, I climbed off Roark to wander to my kitchenette, and I dug my toes into the carpet. The sun tried to get through my curtains, and I flicked off my over-oven light before reaching into the cabinet above. Nibbling my bottom lip, I shook the bottle gently to dislodge the gel capsules from each other, and I winced when they rattled loudly. Glancing over my shoulder, my eyes narrowed on Roark’s thinned mouth and working jaw.
I haven’t drank since my accident.
Filling a glass with water, I went to sit on the coffee table that also doubled as my desk while guilt swarmed my insides. Peeking out from under his arm, Roark frowned deeply before his hand shot up to caress my cheek. My body went stiff, and he cleared his throat harshly.
“Don’t look like that, Ally. I’m a grown man- I can deal with a wine hangover.” Rough fingertips dragged down my forearm to take the pills in my hand and shove them in his mouth. He swallowed them dry, and I pursed my lips together before he thumbed them tenderly. “You didn’t break sobriety or anything. Just relax.”
Only offering a weak smile in return, I circled the glass in my hand absently until Roark took it. Downing the cool liquid in one gulp, he set the glass on the floor to grab my wrist. I made no move to stop him from pulling me back into my spot on the futon, and he tucked my head under his chin with a sigh.
