Hillary_Flesh and Blood

by Angel Gelique

  “Shit,” Hillary mumbled under her breath as she stared at her sister’s lifeless body.

  She let her body slump slowly to the floor beside her sister. She had felt so strong, so powerful just a short while ago and now she was filled with a mixture of emotions. Waves of doubt, regret, anger and even sadness all tugged at her, vying for her acceptance.

  She never cared about you, the voice asserted, why should you care about her?

  Hillary’s eyes began to mist as she thought about the girl she used to be and what she had now become. It was hard to believe that she had killed two people—two family members—two people she once loved. What would she do now? Even if her plan worked and she could fool her mother into believing that her father left with her sister, she would know the truth. Could she really live with herself, with what she had done?

  Shut up, the voice admonished her. It’s not your fault…he caused all of this to happen...he deserved to die....

  It was true. Hillary knew that it was entirely her father’s fault. He had destroyed her life. How could she be blamed for anything she did when she would never have done it in the first place if he had only kept his hands and other body parts to himself?

  Stay strong...crying is a sign of weakness...you’re in control now....

  The emotions battling within Hillary’s mind made her dizzy. She heard the voice loudly and clearly, but wasn’t quite ready to listen. She looked over at her sister and a single tear escaped from her eye.

  She was prettier than you, the voice taunted.

  She was better than you, it continued.

  That’s why your father didn’t touch her, didn’t hurt her like he hurt you...she was more important than you....

  “Shut up!” Hillary screamed angrily.

  You’re just a weak, spineless whore....

  “No!” Hillary screamed, “I’m not weak, I’m not a whore, I’m not—”

  Hillary stopped shouting, startled by the sudden movement of Caleigh’s head. Caleigh’s eyes slowly flickered open. She began making a sound, which, even through the tape, was loud and desperate.

  Hillary reached over and pulled the duct tape free from Caleigh’s mouth with a quick tug. It made Caleigh grimace.

  “Hill...” she whispered laboriously, as if it took all her strength to try to utter her sister’s name.

  Hillary didn’t know what to feel. She eyed Caleigh blankly.

  “Pleeeeassseee,” Caleigh moaned softly.

  She’s better than you....

  “No...” Hillary whispered, “I’m the better one.”

  “Yes, yes,” Caleigh agreed softly, hoping to pacify her sister.

  She wants to play some more....

  Hillary was ready to play some more too. She reached over and squeezed Caleigh’s bulbous nose. She could feel the crunching beneath her fingertips.

  With strength she didn’t know she had left in her, Caleigh wailed in agonizing pain as she attempted to turn her head away from Hillary. Hillary finally released her nose when the blood began dripping down her hand.

  “Is that all you can feel? Your big, bloody nose?” Hillary asked sneeringly. “How about this?”

  Hillary pinched Caleigh’s chest, digging her nails in so deep that pieces of her sister’s flesh were dislodged and packed densely within her fingernails. Caleigh’s cries remained steady. It was apparent that she could not feel her chest.

  “What about this?” Hillary asked tersely as she pinched her right cheek the same way she had pinched her chest.

  Caleigh responded with a loud, sharp yell as she pulled her head away from Hillary’s hand. Blood beaded on the surface of the deep scratches Hillary’s nails made on her face.

  “And this,” Hillary continued excitedly, pinching and bruising her sister’s arm.

  Hillary was uncertain from Caleigh’s prolonged sobbing whether she could feel it.

  “Well? Is that a yes or a no?” she demanded, grabbing a hold of her sister’s meaty upper arm and squeezing it firmly, sinking all five of her nails within her sister’s soft flesh.

  Caleigh nodded as her cries intensified.

  “No more,” she whimpered, “Pleeeaassse....”

  Hillary cackled as Caleigh stared into her rabid eyes, searching desperately for a glint of the sister she once knew.

  “Don’t bother begging...it doesn’t get you anywhere, believe me, I know.”

  “Don’t hurt me....”

  “Who stopped me from getting hurt? Where was my hero?”

  “I don’t know,” Caleigh whimpered, “I don’t know.”

  “You don’t know. You don’t know what I’ve been through. You don’t know the things I was forced to do.”

  “What things?”

  “It doesn’t matter now...no one will ever hurt me again.”

  “Please let me go...I’ll help you.”

  Hillary laughed out loud.

  “How can you help me? You can’t even help yourself. You can barely move your head and every other part of you is useless.”

  Caleigh sobbed louder.

  “Maybe I just need to go to the hospital. Maybe a doctor can fix me.”

  “Well we’ll never know will we, Lee Lee?”

  “Hillary, please just let me go, I won’t tell anyone about...about...Daaaaddd....” Caleigh’s voice cracked as she became choked up.

  “I know you won’t tell, ‘cause I won’t let you.”

  “Are you...going to kill me?” Caleigh’s eyes held a mixture of terror and dread. She had felt like dying earlier, but now she just wanted to see her mother.

  “When we’re done having fun,” Hillary teased.

  “I didn’t even say goodbye to Mom,” Caleigh cried, “I was late for school. I didn’t even give her a kiss goodbye....”

  “Awww,” Hillary mocked, “that’s so sad. I think I’m going to cry.”

  “Please let me see Mom again, Hillary, please, please let me—”

  “Shut up!” Hillary yelled furiously. “Mom doesn’t give a damn anyway.”

  “I have to,” Caleigh continued hysterically, “I have to see her...I have to see Mom...you have to let me see Mom, I have to, I have to....”

  Caleigh repeated herself frantically as Hillary walked over to her dresser where she had returned the duct tape. She tore off a long piece and rushed over to Caleigh whose incessant ranting sounded more and more like unintelligible screeching as fear and anxiety raised her voice several octaves. Hillary placed the tape over Caleigh’s mouth, pressing down upon it firmly to ensure that it was securely in place.

  Caleigh continued with her hysterics, which were muffled but still nearly as loud. Hillary knew she would have to squeeze her sister back into the closet. Her mother would be home soon and it might take some time for Caleigh to settle down and stop being so noisy.

  As before, Hillary shoved the closet door into Caleigh’s body, pushing it until forcefully until it finally shut closed. Caleigh was still hysterical but turned her head away in anticipation of the slamming door. She didn’t want to risk further annihilation of her nose. She continued screaming into the duct tape for nearly twenty more minutes, though she knew it would have no effect. Hillary was going to kill her. She would show no pity. She would show no mercy. In the confines of the dark closet, Caleigh wondered just how much “fun” Hillary would have with her before finally allowing her to die.

  Hillary ignored Caleigh’s noise. With the door closed, she could hardly hear the commotion. Still, she knew that if her mother were to enter her room for whatever reason, Caleigh’s cries would be loud enough to draw attention. She placed her old iPod on the speaker dock and turned on her music, not loud enough to cause her mother consternation, just loud enough to drown out her sister’s noise.

  Smiling impishly, Hillary climbed onto her bed and sat up with her arms crossed behind her head. She wanted to pile some clothing over the stains on her carpet and try to find a way to eliminate—or at least minimize—the odor, but she needed to take a b
reak and relax a moment. She was not looking forward to confronting her mother.

  Having slept less than five hours the night before, Hillary’s eyelids grew heavier and heavier until she fell into a deep sleep. She didn’t even wake when her mother knocked on her door. It was her mother’s hand nudging her that finally awoke her.

  “Whuuhh...” she murmured groggily before her eyes flickered open and she realized her mother was in her bedroom. Panicking, she jumped out of bed, startling her mother who took a couple steps back. She turned her head quickly and looked toward the closet. The door was closed, but she could see a darkened stain—blood—just under the door. Her mother was saying something, but in her panic-stricken state, she could barely comprehend what she was saying.

  “I...I had a nightmare,” she stammered quickly, without even knowing whether it was a proper response to what her mother was saying.

  “Well it’s no wonder, your room is a mess and it stinks to high heaven. What are all these stains on the carpet?”

  “I know...I meant to tell you about it...it’s from that project I had to work on from school. I’m sorry.”

  “Do you know where you father is?”

  Figures, Hillary thought, all she cares about is him, not even the stained carpet fazes her.

  “Yes and no,” Hillary said solemnly, “but I need something to drink...I’ll tell you what I know down in the kitchen.”

  Without waiting for a reply, Hillary swiftly walked out of her room with her mother in tow. She walked down the stairs and straight to the kitchen while rehearsing in her head what she would tell her mother. Her heart was racing and she fought waves of nausea.

  “Hillry hurt Storm...not nice, Hillry,” her little brother admonished with a frown as she went to take a seat at the breakfast bar. She hadn’t even noticed him. She jumped as he spoke then glared at him angrily.

  “Let’s go into the dining room,” she suggested, leaving the kitchen hastily, again without waiting for her mother’s response.

  “Hillary,” her mother called to her as she took long strides to keep up. “What’s this all about?”

  Hillary pulled up a chair beside the dining room table and took a seat, motioning for her mother to do the same. Mrs. Greyson sat beside her.

  “I know you don’t believe anything I tell you anyway,” Hillary said, pausing slightly, “but Dad did abuse me. Now he’s moved on to Caleigh. They packed up their things and left about an hour ago.”

  “What? What kind of sick joke are you trying to play? I—”

  “It’s true, Mom, they’re gone. They took some of their things maybe they’ll be back for the rest.”

  “That’s ridiculous, Hillary, knock it off, I’m not in the mood for your nonsense.”

  “See for yourself, check your room, the suitcase is gone isn’t it?”

  “I have your father’s cell phone. He left it on the dresser last night. He never goes anywhere without it. What’s going on Hillary? Where’s your father? Where’s Caleigh?”

  “My God, why can’t you ever listen to me?” Hillary shouted, banging her fist on the table in frustration.

  “Something’s not right...tell me what’s going on,” Mrs. Greyson demanded.

  “They’re gone and you’ll never see them again!”

  “Where? Where did they go?”

  “Moooommm-mmmeeeeeeee,” Joshua whined from the kitchen.

  “You’ll never see your precious husband and daughter again,” Hillary said scornfully.

  “What did you do, Hillary?” Mrs. Greyson yelled nervously, “What have you done?”

  The horrors in her mind waned in comparison to what Hillary had done and was sunshine and roses compared to the horrors yet to come.

  “You’re so concerned for them, what about me?”

  “Moooommm-mmmeeeeeeee,” Joshua griped even louder.

  “Hillary, please...tell me what’s happened....” Mrs. Greyson cried as she began to tremble.

  “What’s happened is that your husband, my father, raped me...over and over again, too many times to count. He made me do awful things, things I shouldn’t even know about...”

  As Hillary spoke, her mother shook her head, still in denial.

  “He put his disgusting thing in my mouth...he filled my mouth with his disgusting slime, he—”

  “MOOOOMMM-MMMEEEEEEEE,” Joshua wailed loudly.

  “Shut up!” Hillary shouted to him angrily, “keep your mouth shut, Joshua!”

  She could hear him starting to cry.

  “Don’t yell at your brother like that,” her mother reprimanded.

  “Seriously? That’s what’s important right now? I tell you how I’ve been sexually abused and all you can do is yell at me?”

  “You’re lying,” Mrs. Greyson said bluntly, “there’s something wrong with you...you need help.”

  “Yes, there was something wrong with me, but I’m all better now...no thanks to you.”

  “What did you do to your father? And to Caleigh? Did you hurt Caleigh?”

  “They left, Mom, just forget about them.”

  “I’m calling the police,” Mrs. Greyson said anxiously, abruptly springing to her feet.

  Hillary followed suit, standing quickly and jumping in front of her mother to block her path.

  “Go ahead, call them, I have a lot to tell them,” she threatened.

  Mrs. Greyson stared at her daughter in disbelief as she weighed her options.

  “What did you do to them?” she shouted angrily.

  “What did he do to me?” Hillary shouted back even angrier. Her clear eyes darkened as they narrowed and glared at her mother.

  The lunacy within those eyes looked all too familiar.

  “This is not about you, Hillary, you need to—”

  “It’s all about me now, Mom, this is just the beginning...you’ll see...everyone will know one day, they’ll know the truth....”

  “Please, please just tell me where they are. Did you...did you kill them?” Mrs. Greyson’s voice trailed off to a whisper as if saying the words out loud would validate her worst suspicions.

  “BOO!” Hillary shouted as she swiftly leaned toward her mother.

  Mrs. Greyson jumped back with fright, catching her foot on one of the chair legs and stumbling to the floor with a loud thud.

  Hillary laughed hysterically at her mother’s reaction. As she advanced forward, her mother cringed further back. It made Hillary feel superior in every way.

  “MOOOOMMM-MMMEEEEEEEE,” Joshua resumed his wailing after hearing the ruckus.

  “I said shut up, Joshua!” Hillary shouted, eyeing her mother intently, challenging her to reprimand her again.

  Mrs. Greyson stared up at her deranged daughter, fearing what she might have done, what she might do.

  “Well, get up, Mom,” Hillary said lightly, at odds with the lunacy in her eyes.

  Her mother didn’t dare move.

  “MOOOOMMM-MMMEEEEEEEE,” Joshua persisted as he sobbed loudly.

  “I’ll go check on Joshy,” Hillary said nonchalantly, still glaring at her mother.

  “No, no,” Mrs. Greyson pleaded, rising to her feet.

  “It’s okay, I’ll take good care of him,” Hillary said with a big smile as she turned to leave the dining room.

  “No Hillary, please...don’t hurt him, he’s just a baby,” Mrs. Greyson yelled to Hillary as she struggled to keep up with her.

  Joshua’s cries grew louder as Hillary approached. He looked over to his mother for help, reaching his arms out to her. Hillary scooped him up in her arms as he tried his best to wriggle free from her grasp.

  “Stop it, Joshy. Don’t you wanna play with me? Let’s have some fun.”

  “MOOOOOMMMMMM,” he wailed hysterically, still twisting and writhing desperately within Hillary’s arms as Mrs. Greyson reached for him.

  “Give him to me, Hillary,” Mrs. Greyson demanded at first, then added, “please” in an unsteady voice.

  “Nope, we’re going to play
for a while.”

  “No, Hillary, I won’t let you hurt him.”

  “Who said I was going to hurt him? We’re just going to play a nice game of hide and seek...doesn’t that sound like fun, Joshy?”

  Joshua loved playing hide and seek more than any other game. He began to calm down, though still reached for his mother.

  “You want Mommy?” Hillary asked benignly, smiling at Joshua.

  She passed his small body over to their mother who grabbed him tightly and held him close to her chest. Kathy thought about running out of the house, leaving with Joshua, but where would she go? Maybe she was just over-reacting. Maybe Hillary was just playing a cruel joke on her. Maybe Michael and Caleigh would walk through the front door any minute now. She knew Michael well. She had seen how strong he was. How could Hillary possibly hurt him?

  Deep in a dark and hidden crevice of her mind, she knew that Hillary was telling the truth...she knew that Michael was abusing her. She would conceal this ugly truth…she would take it to the grave with her. But knowing that it was true, perhaps what Hillary said about Michael and Caleigh was also true. Maybe he had just moved on. Still, her gut feeling warned her that something was terribly awry.

  “You don’t look so great, Mom,” Hillary said angelically. “Why don’t you go and rest and I’ll take care of dinner?”

  Kathy was so confused, so mentally exhausted that she could only nod slowly as her feet involuntarily obeyed Hillary’s suggestion. She carried Joshua up to her bedroom. At least he’d be safe with her.

  “Hillry hurt Storm,” Joshua said quietly to his mother as he clung to her. “Hillry hurt Joshy?”

  “No, baby, Hillary won’t hurt you, Hillary loves you.”

  As she spoke the words, she wondered just how true they were.

  ~8~

  The house was particularly quiet at dinnertime. Kathy was amazed at how much she missed all of the fussing and complaining that typically accompanied their meals. Even Joshua was unusually silent. He had fallen asleep on her bed and had just awakened when Hillary announced that dinner was ready. Kathy considered skipping dinner altogether, she just wanted to avoid Hillary.