“Really, can you please stop saying ‘sexual’?” I knew it sounded more like a plea, but being with her was both irritating and calming. My eyes rose to find my dad in the doorway with a prize-winning grin from ear to ear. He was enjoying this. I introduced her, forgetting all my manners in the process. He made some comment that I found marginally inappropriate about me chasing Katarina because of her choice of words. He grabbed his sandwich before I could chuck it across the room. It was the moment I regretted texting Katarina and asking her to bring an extra sandwich, his superior, greater-than-thou-smirk was something I could go all day without. I watched their exchange back-and-forth, and found that I enjoyed it. My dad had never met any of my girlfriends other than Jacy, and I think in a weird way, he needed this. Katarina was relaxed and engaged with him, and my dad was eating it up.
“All right, Dad, stop trying to schmooze my girlfriend.” Oh, shit. What was I saying? I shook my head, wanting to take back that word ‘girlfriend’. I was going to scare the rabbit. Go slow, I reminded myself, she is only an innocent princess. My dad must have seen the torment I was in, because he stepped in with his witty words.
“I am not sure if you heard, but she is not interested in a ‘sexual’ relationship with you.” He was real funny, and I was going to make sure I returned the favor.
“I am sure she will change her mind.” I took a bite of my sandwich like I wasn’t nervous as hell that he was right.
“I can be patient. I do have her favorite parts.” I flashed a victorious smile to my dad. I continued eating while the two of them talked about Bo. She had her hands all over my dog, just loving him. It was a great sight. I threw it out there that I felt competitive with Bo for her attention, wanting the reassurance that she was here for me, but then she threw that word out there again…sexual. She was implying that her actions were natural and not sexual, but just hearing the word made my pants twitch. My voice came out louder than I wanted.
“No more with that word.” My dad laughed at my growl, and Katarina was unaffected by my outburst. He started to talk to her while staring directly into my eyes.
“I find it brave of you to be so friendly with,” he paused, eyes locked with mine, “Bo. He scares a lot of people.” His glowering stare left a warning for me to calm down. He shot her a look filled with respect, but she was too busy petting Bo to notice my dad’s adoration.
Her voice was soft and sweet as she said, “Bo has only been friendly to me. He doesn’t look scary at all. In fact, he is so big and loveable, I kind of want to hug him. If he’s so scary, why do you bring him here?”
Bo was a part of me—I knew from the first day I saw him. “He was a gift to someone and he was rejected. I couldn’t leave him home all day.” He might have looked scary, but Bo was all heart and loyalty on the inside. My dad left the office soon after, and Katarina sat down and ate her sandwich. It was enjoyable to watch her eat. I moved closer to her to finish my own sandwich, and she looked up and gave me a huge, appreciative grin in-between bites. She made me want to reach into my chest and hand her my heart. She savored our closeness, just as much as I did. She started talking again as we finished, being completely adorable and amusing, trying to guess what I did for a living. I watched her pretending to concentrate. She had her slender finger resting against her lips, and that motion made my mouth very happy. I felt the sides of my mouth pull up as I imagined kissing those lips again. The thing was, I was not into kissing, but imagining her lips anywhere on my body had me changing what I thought I was in to.
“So let me guess what you do. I see animals in your waiting room, some in cages and some on leashes. You have a very nice secretary. She could be brainwashed. I am not sure people are that happy normally.” I started to make a comment about our wonderful secretary but she shushed me. “Shh…let me finish. You called me a rabbit and make random animal references, which means you know animals or watch a lot of Animal Planet. I am going to guess you work in a lab doing experiments on animals. You know, like drug testing on animals. Am I close?”
My smile broke and grew bigger with every word, not because she was funny, but because she was trying to be funny and I loved that. I listened to her, and added my own advice—she should never consider a job in law enforcement—which caused her to wrinkle her nose, another great look for her.
Valerie, my vet assistant, appeared at the door to let me know my next patient was here and ready to be seen.
“Come on, I’ll show you.” I grabbed my lab jacket and put it on as I made my way to the first room on my left. I grabbed the chart and flipped through it before opening the door. The worried boy and his bloodhound sat on the table in the center of the room. I knew this family well. They had many pets. Concern was written all over the young boy’s face. I questioned him and answered the questions his father had for me. I watched Katarina the whole time out of the corner of my eye, studying her body language. It was hard to focus with her here, but all morning it was hard to focus when she wasn’t here. She moved close to the door and I turned away to give instruction to the father, and then repeated them to the worried boy. The dog had eaten a small plastic toy, so I put the boy at ease by telling him just to keep an eye on Leroy for the next few days. I helped them off the table, and shook the father’s hand before they left. Katarina was all smiles.
“Dr. Riggs? With a name like that, no wonder you never had to work on a personality.”
She was tempting me with her smile and teasing voice and didn’t even know it. I wanted to pin her against the wall and show her the real reason I never had to work on a personality.
“You are sassy, you know that?” And sexy, I wanted to add as I reached out slowly to touch her, not wanting to frighten her. I ran my finger down her cheek, finding a loose strand of perfectly smooth hair, and put it behind her ear. I let my hand stay nestled in her hair for just a moment, wanting desperately to grip her hair and pull her face close to mine. I leaned in to whisper in her ear, “And sassy is very sexy.” I let the words slip out slowly and pulled away to see her face turn that oh-so-pretty pink that I had come to enjoy.
She was quiet after that, and stood in the back of the room. I watched her blend in, like she had done for so many months at the coffeehouse. If she only knew that she never really blended in. She was elegant and proper, and held the beauty of a princess. If I didn’t know her better, by just looking at her I would think she was a snob, too good for any human to talk to. A couple of regular patients attempted to talk with her, but she wouldn’t acknowledge anyone. I knew differently. I knew this princess was just that, a princess, dropped off in a world of ordinary people, and that was why she couldn’t blend in. She was not ordinary.
I moved from room to room, feeling the rush of just having her close to me, knowing she was now watching me on my stage. She wasn’t nervous or anxious to leave, just cautious in her own little bubble, studying me. She went where I went, and my assistant, Valerie tried to talk with her. I even saw Valerie offer her a water bottle, but my scared little black-haired rabbit didn’t even respond. Just a small, shy smile was all she would give. It was as though she would only talk if I was standing next to her, like she was trained to stand and look pretty until instructed to speak. She fascinated me to no end.
We were reaching the end of my day, and I was feeling the loss of her already. Just knowing I was taking her to her unsafe apartment put me in the beginning stages of a foul mood. It only increased when I approached the room Ms. Cutler was in. She came in frequently, and she would bring in one of her many cats. Ms. Cutler was a very flirtatious lady, and my dad would no longer see her because of it. I always made it a point to have an assistant in the room with me because she was that unpredictable. She was, in every sense of the phrase, a cat woman. She even looked like a cat to me—her eyes slanted up, her nose was flat, and she used her tongue a lot while talking, like she was itching to lick something. I walked close to her, and I think I heard a purr escape her lips. She began rattling on about her p
ussy, a word that held no sex appeal coming out of her mouth, so I was indifferent to it until I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. I peeked over and heard Katarina giggle. It was the best sound I had ever heard. I gave her a look that told her to shut up, mainly because I was uncomfortably hard, and her laughter only brought pain to my very achy part. I sent her another intimidating stare, a look that would have anyone else running, or at least looking away out of fear. It just made her smile and stifle a giggle. She removed the hand covering her mouth, and I watched her full lips move in the most seductive way.
“Pussy,” she mouthed slowly, and did a suggestive thing with her eyebrows. Fuck, this girl was killing me slowly. I wanted to grab her arm, shove her out of the room, and show her what talking to me like that did, but I didn’t. I moved past her, inhaling her scent. I gritted my teeth and flung open the door. She didn’t follow, which was smart on her part. I was not feeling kind. I took some deep calming breaths as I entered the room my dad was in. He was talking with a man and his small dog. My dad glanced up, excused himself, and followed me out of the room. He held a concerned look and waited patiently for me to speak. When I couldn’t think of words that would make sense, he spoke.
“What’s wrong, son?” I couldn’t talk, could only look at him, my breathing speeding up and my hands fisting.
“I, uh…” I said as my hand found the back of my neck. “She just mouthed ‘pussy’ to me, in front of Ms. Cutler.” I have heard my dad laugh a lot through the years, mainly at jokes or at movies, but I have never heard him laugh harder than he did at that moment. His body buckled against the wall and he grabbed his stomach, his knees folded, and then he was on the ground banging his fists on the floor. Our staff started to peer around the corner to make sure everything was all right. I just shrugged, but my dad, now crying and hardly breathing, just kept laughing hysterically. He finally reemerged from his spot on the ground, wiping his face, a goofy grin set permanently, his green eyes sparkling from the happy tears.
“I like her son…a lot. I’ll take care of Ms. Cutler’s cat after I finish in here. You go in my office and calm down. I know you like this girl, but you may have found your match. Are you ready for that?” I nodded at him before he stepped back into the room.
Chapter Eleven
I made my way to my dad’s office and pulled my cell phone out of my pocket. I had two missed texts from Dave.
Dave: Hey, born-again virgin. Are we on for basketball?
Dave: The fights are on tomorrow night. How’s about the sports bar? Don’t be a pansy ass, come this time.
I laughed at both his texts before I answered back.
Jason: No basketball tonight. Saves you from losing…again. Don’t know yet about watching the fight. FYI, you’re the pansy ass.
I called my sister Jessica while I was trying to gather my thoughts.
“Hey, Jessie.” There was a long silence before she answered.
“Are you okay, Jason? Your voice sounds awful.” I listened to her words and heard the loud screaming of children in the background. I pictured her busy, making dinner and trying to keep the two children happy.
“I am struggling with my sanity, but probably no worse than you are.” I heard her laugh at my words and it made me smile.
“It’s okay; I can talk. Are you still at work? Did she come and see you today?” I knew she was referring to Katarina. I heard the TV go on and the sounds of cartoons.
“Yes, I am at work and she’s here. Dad met her. I think he is ready to welcome her into the family. I just watched him laugh uncontrollably about something she said to me. Seriously, Jess, he fell on the floor laughing. There were tears, and his face turned bright red because he wasn’t breathing. I am struggling with her choice of words; it’s everything she says. I know she says things innocently, but I find them erotic and sexy. It makes me want to explode. I don’t think she’s used to communicating with people, so what I consider inappropriate in the workplace, she is clueless about. I am pissed and irritated, and I don’t want to go find her because she’ll make me take her home, and I am not ready to let her go. It sounds messed up, huh?” She listened carefully and sighed at the end.
“Dad laughed that hard? She must be something.” Her voice was weak and I could tell she was trying to find the right words.
“I think he might have a concussion. He hit his head multiple times, and his body did actual convulsions on the floor.” She laughed again.
“Sounds like you need to be patient, Jason. Be patient and let her come to you. As far as her comments Brother, you’ve said some things that had me blushing a time or two. So consider it payback. I want to meet her before I say anything else. I don’t want to tell you to throw caution to the wind if she is some crazy, unstable, blonde-haired bitch who turns out to be incredibly mean to you and tears you away from your family.”
“Shit, Jessie that hurts.” I squeezed my eyes shut and sucked a deep breath in. My obvious anger clear in my voice, and I instantly regretted talking to her like that. She stood by me more than anyone else, and I knew she was terrified of losing me again.
“I am not going to abandon you again, Jessie. I mean it.” I heard sniffling and crying on the other end of the phone, and was thankful I wasn’t there to see it. “Hey, Jess, I am okay. Thanks for listening.”
“I love you, Jason.” She sounded emotional.
“I love you too, sis.” I hung up first and put a piece of clear tape over the infrared light on the underside of my dad’s mouse before leaving his office and heading into mine. Take that, old man.
I entered my office and took off my jacket in one swift motion like I did every day, but for some reason, with her watching, it felt foreign.
“I’m not a good veterinarian’s assistant,” she said and paused as I froze, and then continued, “sorry.” I hated myself in that moment, because I made her feel less wonderful than she was. I didn’t move, didn’t respond; I don’t think I knew how too. Comforting someone wasn’t something I did unless it was after extremely rough sex and I felt reasonable. She spoke again, and her words broke my heart.
“Are you upset with me?” I looked up at her, immediately finding her sad blue eyes, and I smiled, hoping she would mimic mine like she did in the coffeehouse. I moved towards her slowly and she didn’t run, which I found to be incredibly brave of my rabbit. When I was inches from the top of her head, I tipped my nose in to inhale of her scent, and brushed my lips over her soft forehead. I wanted to hug her, but it didn’t feel right. I wasn’t used to this kind of relationship. It didn’t come naturally to me. I wanted to be normal and loving for her, but I needed to go slow, for me this time. I steered her out of the office with my hand on the lower curve of her back. I could do this; this was me controlling her for just a few minutes. I heard my dad on the phone as we passed his office, repeating the earlier Cutler story to the person on the other end. He was chuckling as he tried over and over to use his mouse. Katarina waved goodbye, and I laughed as he continued clicking his mouse with no response.
We reached my Jeep, and I gently lifted her up into the passenger seat. A giggle left her mouth when my hands touched her hips. It was a great sound. I needed to hear more of those. I rounded the Jeep and climbed in. She glanced at me with the cutest smile and started talking before we pulled out of the parking lot.
“Have you always wanted to be a vet? Or did you just want to work with your dad?” I was quiet, taking in her questions. “I like your dad. He seems,” she hesitated, and when I gazed in her direction she was in deep thought. Her eyes shifted to mine and warmth filled my body. All I could see was her eyes; every other feature fell away. Her voice jolted me back to reality, “gentle and kind. You’re lucky; you scored a great dad.” Her smile fell slightly and she looked away. It bothered me when she purposely blocked herself from me. I turned and focused my attention on the road, trying to remember her questions.
“I always wanted to take care of animals. Growing up, my dad took me on all the
house calls. He would explain to me step-by-step what he was doing and why. He is a great teacher, very patient.” I nodded my head in agreement. “I have a good family.” I was thinking about my sister, Jessica, and secretly hoped I hadn’t ruined her evening.
“What is your favorite animal?” I couldn’t describe how pleased I was with her constant questioning. I didn’t smile though, I couldn’t deal with the thought that as soon as I stopped the Jeep, she would get out and disappear. It was an overwhelmingly disappointing thought.
“I like bigger animals. Horses are my favorite. There is something graceful and mysterious about them. Growing up, my father would let me take part in deliveries, and like most deliveries, the babies are a miracle, but horses…” I looked at her to see if she was listening. Her eyes were bright and full of curiosity, and they seemed to dance all over my face. “Horses were fascinating.” I couldn’t come up with the right words to describe my fixation on horses. My lack of words was humorous to her because when I snuck another peek at her, she flashed a big smile.
“I get it. You don’t have to say anymore.” She was so perfect for me, this princess that drove me insane. That one little comment made me feel like anything was possible.
We drove in silence for a while; I worked on taking deep breaths to calm myself, and she gazed out the window. I would give anything to read her thoughts. We pulled into her apartment complex and just sat for a few minutes, neither of us ready for this to end.
“I would feel much better if I checked out your place before I left.” I squeezed my eyes together trying again for a more traditional approach. “I mean, please let me see you to your door.” She scrutinized me as I spoke; her eyes traveling over every inch of my face and didn’t say anything. She opened her door when she finished and called Bo out to her side. Her love for Bo surprised me, but it was very welcome from both Bo and me. I looked at her in wonder, and she spoke like it was the simplest decision.
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