Ruined: Loving An Alpha Male: BWWM Romance

by Lessly, S. K.

  I heard the bath water running, and he came back out.

  “I need to decompress a little, okay? I’ll be downstairs if you need me. Do you need help getting undressed or into the tub?”

  I shook my head. “No, I’m okay.”

  “Are you hungry?”

  “No.”

  He sighed and just stared at me for a moment. “Well, I’ll just be downstairs. Call me if you need me.”

  He turned and left the room. I wanted to stop him and just ask him to hold me. I wanted him to take away all the fear and hurt I was feeling. But I couldn’t ask him that. I wanted to explain to him why I didn’t call him in the first place, but I knew he wouldn’t understand. I felt like I betrayed him a little, which is why I let him walk out of the room.

  I slowly removed my clothes and lowered myself in the hot water. I soaked for a while, trying to figure out what to do about Mason and me. I knew without a doubt I was in love with him. But I also knew he didn’t live in Philly. I knew he wasn’t ready for a relationship and may never be. And I knew he was going to break my heart. But I didn’t care about any of those things. All I wanted to do was to be with him. I would take whatever I could get from him. I just hoped he still wanted me.

  I slowly made my way from the bathtub to the bed. I rewrapped my ribs and pulled a t-shirt from his drawer and put it on. I wanted to go downstairs and talk to him, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. It seemed he needed some time to himself, and I needed to give it to him. I’ve never seen the look he had in his eyes before in my life. He didn’t scare me, but it unnerved me. I knew he was in a dark place, and I needed to let him come out of it before I approached him.

  So instead, I lay in the bed, hoping he would join me soon. I stared out into the night, wondering what my future would hold. Would he love me the way I loved him?

  “Probably not.”

  I jumped up at the voice and was instantly thrown against the wall. A tight grip was around my neck so I couldn’t breathe. I fought and clawed at the hand that was pulling life from me, but I couldn’t move it. I felt hot breath that smelled of death on my neck. He was kissing me now.

  God, my chest hurt. My lungs; I can’t get air.

  “You think I would want you? Your father didn’t even want you. Your grandfather deserted you. It’s your fault I’m here. It’s for the best though; you dying like this. Saves everyone the grief. But first, I’m going to take what’s mine.”

  The man licked my face. Then he took his other hand and gripped my sex. “Someone please help me!” I was starting to see spots. The darkness was getting closer.

  “No! Please?!” I tried to fight, but the fight was out of me. I took one last breath and screamed as loud as I could. My voice was hoarse, but I screamed anyway. I felt someone grab me and call my name. I started to fight. I felt my strength coming back.

  Just keep screaming.

  “Pleaseeeee!!” I heard myself, and my eyes shot open.

  Not remembering where I was, I scrambled up from the covers trying to get away from a dark figure in front of me. I couldn’t remember where I was, and it scared the shit out of me. The pain hit me from my ribs as I grabbed my shirt and felt it and my hair clinging to me.

  “Baby, wake up. I’m here. It’s okay, angel. I got you.”

  The sound of the voice in front of me was lifting the haze. My eyes started to focus, and the figure holding me was familiar. Mason was here. I gripped his arms as I tried to catch my breath. My throat hurt so badly, and I instantly reached for my neck. I couldn’t catch my breath. Hell, my chest and ribs were on fire.

  “Calm down, baby. Look in my eyes. Come on, baby. Listen to me.” He touched my sweat-drenched face and caressed my hair back from my face. “Please, baby. Look at me.”

  Finally, I did, and I saw the blue eyes I fell in love with.

  “That’s it, baby. Keep your eyes on me.”

  He moved closer to me, still holding my face gently but firmly, so I wouldn’t look anywhere else but at him. I saw him take deep breaths.

  “Come on, Allura. Take a deep breath with me. Come on, I know you can do it.”

  I couldn’t. It hurt too much. Instead, I just broke down and cried. I closed my eyes and let the tears fall. I felt him pull me into his lap. He held me the way I’ve wanted for days to be held.

  “Oh, baby. I’m so sorry. It’s okay. Now, you’re safe. I promise he won’t touch you again.”

  It seemed I couldn’t get closer to him, so I gripped him as tight as I could.

  “I got you, baby.”

  I felt him move me slightly, making me straddle him. He pulled me back and caressed my face, taking special care with the bruise that I knew was visible.

  “I’ve been an idiot, baby. I shouldn’t have let you leave my car that day. I’ve missed you so much.”

  I was stunned. He wiped my tears softly and kissed my tear-stained cheeks.

  He said to me, “I know I’m not perfect, and I don’t try to be. But I’m willing to be whatever you need for me to be. Just tell me you still want me.”

  I started to get my breath. But the air was so heavy, and I squirmed in his lap. He watched me wide-eyed, as I shook my head. He sat up straighter.

  “I want to try, baby. Please, just don’t push me away.”

  He tightened his grip on my hips. I looked in his eyes and saw nothing about sincerity in them. I swallowed deeply and then found my voice.

  I asked, “Are you sure?”

  I barely recognized my voice. It was so hoarse.

  “I’m sure that I’ve missed you. I’m sure that these past few days have been hell without you. I’m sure there’s no other woman I would rather be with than you. And I’m sure you have officially ruined me.”

  I smiled for the first time in days.

  “And you ruined me,” I said back to him.

  He pulled me to him for the sweetest kiss I had ever felt. My toes curled as he softly caressed my lips with his. He didn’t deepen the kiss. He didn’t make it lustful. It was just full of promises that he didn’t say with words. He laid us down onto the bed and pulled the covers over us both. He kissed the top of my head.

  “Go to sleep, Allura. We’ll talk tomorrow, okay?”

  I snuggled closer to him. He pulled me tight into his side, being mindful of my ribs. I closed my eyes, thinking about the idea of him and me. Could I be enough for him? Could I love him the way he deserved? I knew the answers were yes. I just hoped he would let me.

  The next few days, he took care of me. He helped me shower, trying not to wince at the sight of my bruised ribs and face. He catered to me and fed me. He drove me back and forth to school, my apartment, and his apartment.

  Since he had two fights on Saturday, Lou told the officials he would be taking off this weekend. The bruise on my face was gone by then, but my ribs still hurt a little.

  That Saturday night, Mason cooked me dinner with candles lit all around the living room. We sat on the floor picnic-style. He fed me as I laid my legs across his and my back to the wall. He had music playing in the background. For some of the songs, I sang to him; sometimes he even sang to me. I was shocked that he had a fantastic voice. It was a soulful and rich sounding voice that, to be quite honest, made me want him.

  Yup, even more than I already did.

  He hasn’t asked me about what happened to me that day. I think some of the reason he didn’t ask had to do with him getting angry all over again, and the other part was that he was waiting for me. We were sitting on the floor, laughing and singing to each other, as he fed me a great-tasting chocolate cheesecake that was heavenly. I tilted my head and watched as he reached for his plate to spear me another piece of heaven. When he looked up at me, he smiled.

  “What, are you full?”

  I shook my head. I crawled over to him and brought my lips to his for a much-needed kiss. I moved the cheesecake from his lap and replaced it with my body. He hasn’t touched me for almost two weeks, and I was fainting for him. I tou
ched his cheeks with my hands to deepen the kiss. When I rotated my hips in his lap, he groaned and pulled me closer to him.

  Our kiss became full of want and desire and need. I missed his lips on me. I think he felt the same way because he broke the kiss to kiss my neck. I fisted his hair that was growing quite long.

  “Oh, Mason,” I moaned into his neck. “I want you.”

  “You sure you can handle it?” he pulled back to ask me.

  I smiled.

  “Have I ever not handled you?”

  He smiled back.

  “Well, that’s true.”

  “I don’t care either way, Mace. I just know I want you,” I admitted.

  He looked in my eyes then smiled broader. He wrapped my legs firmly around him, and he stood. He carried me over to the door to check the lock, set the alarm, and blew out the candles. When we walked up the steps and got to his room, he laid me down on the bed. Then he slowly and carefully reconnected his tongue with my body.

  He paid heavy attention to my needing nipples as they hardened before he even touched me. I was panting by the time he began kissing down my chest to my stomach, being careful of the fading bruise. When he got to my clit, he expertly reminded me how good he made me feel with just a flicker of his tongue.

  I grinded on his face, as he spread me open further. When I felt I was about to explode, he sucked my clit. I called out his name and then winced. He stopped and backed away from me cautiously.

  “Baby, are you sure you’re ready?”

  I could see how nervous he was, but I was beyond caring about pain. The pain and the throbbing between my legs were worse than how my ribs felt. I decide to tease him a little to jump-start him. I slowly ran my hand down my breast to my stomach. I then moved further down until I reached my swollen clit. I began to move my hips and play with myself while he watched.

  “Shit, baby. What the fuck?”

  I watched him as I pleasured myself in front of him, and just the look on his face turned me on. I took my other hand, wet my fingers, and played with my nipple at the same time.

  “Baby, why are you?”

  He grabbed the bedpost, and I focused on the whites of his knuckles as he watched me. He licked his lips hungrily, and I knew I had him. I started panting faster and moving my hips faster as I saw him absentmindedly grab his dick and begin to stroke himself.

  “Mason…Oh damn, baby. I’m going to come without you…Oh, God.”

  Suddenly he reached my hand to stop me. He reached next to me and rolled a condom on really quickly as I squirmed in anticipation.

  He growled as he pushed inside me, “You will not come without me, ever. You hear me? Tell me this pussy is mine.”

  He dominated me right then, and I couldn’t talk as he commanded me. He stroked me hard and deep, grabbing my legs and thrusting them over his shoulders. He moved his hips expertly, and I felt my release coming.

  “Mason,” I called his name, as the feeling was coming over me again, but then he stopped.

  “Look at me, Allura, when you come. You hear me? Don’t you fucking close your eyes. You want this? You got it, baby. Tell me it’s mine. Tell me you’re mine, or I’m stopping.”

  “Mason,” I whined as I felt him pick up speed again. “Oh yes, baby… Right there…Fuck!”

  He then stopped again, and I growled. He chuckled and looked at me.

  He said, “What the fuck did I say, Allura? Tell me.”

  He picked up speed, and he hit my g-spot. I felt no pain as I told him exactly what I was feeling.

  “Oh God, Mason. This is all yours, baby. Nobody else’s… Oh please, baby. Please.”

  “You belong to me, you hear me? Open your fucking eyes, baby, and tell me.”

  I nodded frantically.

  “Yes, baby. I’m all yours. Nobody else’s. You’ve spoiled me… Baby, oh…”

  He pounded me relentlessly and with control and dominance.

  I was helpless as he then pulled out and told me, “Face down and ass up, baby.”

  I moved quickly, just to feel him inside me again.

  “That’s right, baby. I’m molding this pussy just for my dick. This pussy will only fit me.”

  He then smacked my ass and took over my body. I think I passed out, but he woke me back up by kissing me from the back of my neck to my ass. I moaned in approval to what he was doing.

  “Turn around, baby. I want to make love to you,” he said softly in my ear.

  I turned around slowly, while he raised up. When I met his gaze, he smiled shyly. ‘Holy Shit.’

  “Do you trust me?”

  I didn’t hesitate.

  “Yes.”

  “Then let me show you how much you mean to me.”

  Chapter 10

  Mason

  I fucking loved this woman. I wanted to show her how much, starting right now this fucking moment. I started by kissing the fuck out of her slowly. Our tongues danced slowly with each other’s, as I caressed her body underneath me. I took my time, like I always did. But when I finally entered her, I could tell the feeling between her legs was different than even earlier than before.

  I moved slowly in her, and she moved with me stroke for stroke. I pulled out slowly to the tip of my dick. Then I pushed her back in, just to make sure I penetrated her as deep as I could. I wanted to feel every part of her. I desperately needed it.

  “Keep your eyes on me, baby,” I told her softly, and she obeyed. “Damn, you’re so beautiful, baby. So beautiful.”

  That’s all I could say, as my forehead touched hers, and I got lost inside her. I made love to her as long as I could. I kept switching positions, but I made sure I never took my eyes off her. When we both climaxed together, I swear it was the best feeling I had ever had. She has me by the fucking balls, and I’m scared as fuck. I felt her shiver slightly as I held her.

  “Are you okay?” I whispered.

  “Yes, I’m fine.”

  One thing about this woman, she’s never quiet. I probably freaked her out by what I had just done. Hell, I was freaked out myself.

  I sat up and went into the bathroom to dispose of the condom. I decided to start the bath for us both and went back to the bed. She had her eyes closed, so I whispered in her ear.

  “Hey, let’s go get cleaned up.”

  I helped her up and pulled her with me. I tried not to look at her body, especially the bruise. Just seeing it reminds me what happened, and I feel the darkness rising again.

  It took a lot to come out of the darkness this time. It was something so strong that kept me. To be honest, I was starting to enjoy it. When I heard Max scream for me, I thought he was here. Then when I saw her drenched with sweat, her hoarse screams pushed all darkness away. She looked terrified, as if Travis was right in front of her. I reached for her, and she coiled away from me, scampering away, as if I was actually Travis.

  She was in full panic mode. It took a lot to get her to calm down, but I did it. I haven’t let her out of my sight, except for school.

  “Come on.”

  I helped her in the tub and then went to get towels for us both. She looked surprised as I signaled for her to scoot up, so I could get in behind her. I shifted, and she waited until I was comfortable before she fell back against me. I kissed the top of her head.

  “How does this feel?”

  “Mmmm, it feels great. Thanks,” she told me.

  I intertwined my fingers with hers and brought her hand to my lips.

  “Good,” was all I could say.

  We remained quiet for a spell before she told me, “Did I ever tell you I took self-defense classes when I was young?”

  “No, you haven’t. How old were you?”

  “Thirteen. My pops didn’t sleep well at night until I knew how to defend myself. My father failed miserably at being a dad. He was cool for a while after my mom left. I mean for years, it was just me and him. Most nights were spent with my best friend, Kat, and her mom. But my dad stayed a part of my life until Bunny cam
e around.”

  I chuckled.

  “Bunny? Was that her real name?”

  I don’t know what’s up with people and the horrible nicknames they call themselves.

  “You know, I have no clue. That was just what she told me to call her. Anyway, when she got there, my father started to change. Or maybe he was changing before she got there. I can’t quite remember. But I knew the first day she came to live with us that I was in hell.”

  “Was she abusive?”

  ‘Please, say no.’

  “No, she wasn’t physically abusive. But mentally she was. She would work me to death, though. I cooked and cleaned for both of them. One good thing, though, is that I had Kat and her mom. That is, until they moved away. When they did, I had no choice but to be around Bunny all day, every day. That summer after my thirteenth birthday, my dad’s father came to visit. It was the first time I had ever met the man. He was big and tall like my father, but his eyes were much harder. He was scary, even. He bullied my father around and made him do things around the house that he normally wouldn’t do. He hated Bunny. He bullied her, too. I just sat back and enjoyed it. What he did for me, though, was something that no one had done since I was born: he took care of me.”

  “He bought me expensive clothes, shoes, the latest purses. I mean, he spoiled me rotten. He made sure I ate breakfast, had money for lunch, and that I ate a proper dinner that I didn’t have to cook. When I was thirteen, I was a very shapely girl. My breasts were huge, and I didn’t have proper bras. So guess who took care of that."

  “Your pops.”

  I laughed. “Yup, my pops.”

  “Is that when you came to live with him? He couldn’t resist your undeniable beauty?” I asked her.

  “No, unfortunately, he couldn’t take me with him when he left. He tried, though. But my father was—or rather, still is—a vindictive bastard. At the end of the summer, my pops told me he had to leave. He wanted to take me, but my father placed a restraining order against him. So if he took me without my father’s consent, it would be kidnapping. To be honest, I don’t think my father would have cared either way. But Bunny, I think, talked him into keeping me. She wanted a slave. She hated me. She did everything she could to make me feel horrible about myself and my looks. My pops made me feel beautiful. But when he left, so did that feeling. He did, however, buy me a cell phone. He told me to call one particular number in the phone if I was ever in trouble, and he couldn’t get to me.”