by Alice Ward
“I’m leaving for Daytona soon. Will I get to see you before I go?” he asked, his voice growing deeper.
“I hope so,” I admitted, lowering my voice to match his.
“I hope so too. Sure you can’t come over?”
Something deep inside me twisted, but I needed to stand my ground. “Hopefully soon.”
He exhaled. “Alright, baby. Soon.”
I powered off my phone before I changed my mind, then realized I was holding it to my chest.
“I don’t know what you see in that man,” Whitney hissed as I slipped it into my purse.
Mmm… if only she knew all the reasons I put up with Ace Newman.
“Gross!” she exclaimed, and I realized I was smiling. Well, actually I was grinning like a cat ready to lap up a bowl of cream. I tried to wipe the sinful expression off my face, really I did. By the look on Whit’s face, I could tell I wasn’t successful.
“I know you aren’t his biggest fan, Whitney, but you haven’t seen the parts of him that I have.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Actually, I did see his donkey dick in the locker room once, so—”
I’m not sure what else she said because I could hear nothing but my own laughter. It must have been contagious because she was soon laughing too. When we finally calmed down, I admitted, “He is huge, but there’s something else about him that draws me to him. Something wounded that he doesn’t let many people see.”
“And you’ve seen it?”
I nodded. “Yeah, and the pain inside him is so deep, it’s like he pushes everyone away before they can get too close, see the little boy inside him who’s hurting so much.”
Whitney ran a hand down my arm. “And you want to save him from himself?”
I thought about the question. “I don’t know that I can. I don’t know that anyone can. But I think I’m the first woman he’s let get this close to him. He talks to me, and I think he appreciates that I really listen.”
Whitney blinked a few times. “That makes me really sad for him, but Holly, please don’t sell your soul to him. Don’t get back into the same situation as your fa—” She snapped her mouth closed, but I knew what she was going to say. Your father.
I knew all about the cycle of abuse, and I certainly didn’t want that to happen to me either. But…
I sighed, knowing it was that “but” that would get me into trouble.
But… I wanted to save Ace from himself.
I wanted to continue to see the part of him that others didn’t.
I wanted to feel the way I felt with him. Not just during sex, but in the times he opened himself up to me. There was so much more to him than he allowed the world to see and he protected that good, sweet part of him with the asshole bad boy that was tabloid fodder.
But Whitney was right. I couldn’t sell my soul to save him. I couldn’t give up myself in the process.
By the time we exited the ladies room, I’d gotten myself under control, and Whitney became Jack’s cheerleader. “I think Jack likes you.”
It was pretty obvious that he was interested. “He seems nice,” I said.
“And cute,” Whitney teased.
I nodded but didn’t say the words that sprang into my mind — but he isn’t Ace.
The waitress had brought another round of drinks while we were gone and Whitney quickly sucked half of hers down with one gulp. “I think we should take off after this.” Her sweet demeanor and fake yawn wasn’t fooling anyone, at least not me. I knew she was trying to take off early and leave me alone with Jack. And, actually, that was fine with me. It might be good for me to have someone other than Ace to focus on.
Calvin agreed, and Jack quickly turned to me. “Would you mind staying for another drink?”
“Of course.”
Whitney kept my attention with wedding talk while the guys finished their beers and planned their trip to Daytona Beach. Calvin was leaving tomorrow, but Jack would be in town a couple more days. When Calvin finished his beer, he turned and smiled, as if he knew of his future wife’s diabolical plan to find me a new man — this man, this gorgeous man.
“You all have fun.” He kissed my cheek. “See ya in six weeks. Enjoy your new digs and keep an eye on my girl.”
I gave him a hug. “I will. Happy training.”
Whitney came around the table and squeezed me tightly before pulling Calvin away from the table and towards the front doors.
Without Whitney’s eyes burning through me across the table, time with Jack became comfortable and easy. I found myself enjoying talking to him, finding out about his life. The fact that he was easy on the eyes didn’t hurt.
An only child, born and raised in Los Angeles and recently traded from his hometown team, Jack was lost in the city and felt homesick, which warmed my heart. Los Angeles was a much different environment from my small Indiana hometown, but there were times I missed it so I could relate, but most times, I preferred to be here in the city.
Jack picked at the last potato skin on mine and Whitney’s appetizer plate. “You hungry?” he asked.
“Not really, but I can tag along.”
“I saw a pizza place next door when I came in, and my stomach has been grumbling ever since,” he admitted.
“Let’s do it!” I finished my drink and smiled. I was starting to feel light-headed from the alcohol, and I wasn’t entirely ready to say goodnight, so food was the perfect solution to keep it going for a bit longer.
He stood, pulled my chair out for me, and handed me my purse. I wasn’t missing Ace Newman at all. In fact, I was feeling pretty empowered about blowing him off.
I’d worn a lightweight jacket and the night air on the busy city street was growing colder. Jack pulled his heavier coat off and wrapped it around my shoulders without me even asking. Wow!
Jack offered me his arm, and we walked the half block to the place that had tortured his hunger pains all evening. The pizza was good, typical New York style, thin crust and too much cheese with an extra helping of grease, but sitting in that old worn out red booth with Jack was fun.
“I’d love to see you again,” he said after wiping orange pizza grease from his chin.
“I would too.”
“Maybe when I get back from spring training?”
“That would be great.”
He asked about my family, and I eventually shared that Mom was gone, and Dad and I weren’t exactly close, but I didn’t tell him why. Most of the family topic was spent talking about Hannah, my younger sister, and my grandfather, who I admired more than any man in the world.
Jack’s home life seemed picture perfect with parents who were still married and loved one another, with no other siblings to take the spotlight. The ocean was his playground growing up. It sounded picturesque, nothing like my own.
“I’ve probably bored you to death,” he said before standing from the booth.
His hand extended and gripped onto mine as he helped me to my feet. I was stuffed, bloated even, not exactly feeling my sexiest at that moment, but he looked at me as if I were the sexiest woman he’d ever seen.
I knew it was coming, the look in his eyes made it undeniable. My body clenched and my breathing became rapid as he pulled me into his arms. The aroma of sweet pizza sauce floated around the room as his lips pressed against mine. He was stiff too, probably just as tense as me, so it felt forced, not romantic like I’d hoped. I assumed he felt the awkwardness as well, but when his tongue slid across my lips and then poked into my mouth with rapid jabs, it was obvious he’d either not noticed or had chosen to ignore it and push on.
Wow, this sucks!
My tongue met his with a less than eager salutation before I gently pulled away, wiping the slobber from my chin. His eyes were so blue, still so seductive, and that face, my God, that beautiful face that harbored such lousy lips.
What a letdown.
“I’ll hail you a cab,” he offered, still smiling like that kiss was more than it had been.
&n
bsp; “Thank you,” I replied and pulled a little farther from his tall, muscular body.
Outside, I gave him his coat back, even though he insisted I keep it. “Can I get your number?” he asked.
My stomach turned, but I forced a smile and took out my phone. “What’s yours?”
I inputted the digits into my contact list and started to push the phone back into my purse when he stopped me. “Call me now so I’ll have yours too.”
I hesitated but did it anyway, lighting up his phone and his face with the call. I knew I was probably overreacting; it was just an awkward first kiss, that’s all. He was handsome, gorgeous really, and I should be attracted to him.
Should be, but wasn’t.
“Text me when you get home so I know you made it safe,” he said as I waved my hand frantically in the air towards the oncoming cab.
“Okay,” I agreed, having no real intentions of doing any such thing.
I climbed into the cab; Jack shut the door and waved as it pulled away from the curb. I stared out the window and wondered how in the hell a man that impressive could leave me feeling so cold.
CHAPTER SIX
Ace
“You have a very sexy voice,” I said to the woman on the other end of my phone.
“Thank you.” She was staying professional, but I could hear pleasure in her response. “One first class ticket to Daytona Beach, leaving this afternoon at one o’clock. Is there anything else I can help you with today?” Her tone was still too professional for my liking.
“You can help me with your phone number.” I didn’t really want it, but I couldn’t help myself. Shit spewed from my mouth sometimes.
She giggled but didn’t fall for my line. “You have a great flight, Mr. Newman. And, good luck this season.” The phone clicked, and the woman with the sexy voice was gone from my life forever.
I gripped the handle of my bag, lifted it from the floor, and headed out the front door. Everything was locked up, the maid service set to clean once every two weeks while I was gone, and even though there was a nagging in my stomach, I was certain I hadn’t forgotten anything. Nothing I couldn’t buy when I reached my destination.
“Hey, wild man!” Brent said. He was a driver I sometimes hired to drive me around when I was going to party too hard, or like today, didn’t want to leave the Porsche at the airport for six weeks. “You’re getting an early start this season.” He noted my premature departure for spring training. I’d decided last night to head down early. I didn’t like being left behind.
“Yeah. No reason to hang around here.” I slid into the back seat, inserted earbuds into my ears, and turned up the Lynyrd Skynyrd playing on my phone.
The city whizzed past my window. Busy people traveled on their long commutes to work, bundled up kids walked along the sidewalks on their way to school, and here I sat in the warmth of my car, getting ready to get whisked away to Daytona Beach. Yes. I loved my life.
We detoured to the stadium first, and I thought it looked so desolate as Brent parked near the private entrance. There was no practice today, and from what I’d learned, only Coach and the pitching team would be there, huddling up before heading south for whatever specialized training bullshit they planned to do.
Well, good news, boys. Ace decided to join you.
“How long do you think you’ll be?” Brent asked as he opened the back door.
I slid out, removed my earbuds, and smiled. “Not sure. Why don’t ya grab some breakfast. Don’t go too far though.” I slipped a fifty in his hand.
“Thank you,” he gushed.
I left my bag in the car, walked towards the player’s entrance, and took a deep breath. I wasn’t sure coach was gonna like this. One of the homeless guys who hung around the place was huddled in a corner.
“Hey, Oscar,” I said, and he lifted his dirty head. I’d offered the vet room and board many times, but he never took it, said he couldn’t stand being closed up in a room. I pulled out my wallet and handed him a couple hundred dollars. “I’ll be gone for a while, so you gotta make it last, okay.”
“Thanks, Ace. Will do that.”
Damn. I hated leaving him in the cold like this.
“I could use a house sitter while I’m gone. Sure I can’t talk you into helping me out?”
His eyes changed, grew weary just like they always did when I mentioned it. “Nah. I like the outdoors just fine.”
I checked his gear. The thick sleeping bag and blankets I bought him before leaving for Hawaii still looked to be in good shape, as did his shoes and warm coat. “Did you lose your gloves?” I asked him, noting his bare fingers when he took the money.
“Some fool stole them.”
I took mine off and squatted to help him pull them on. “Here, I won’t need these in Florida. Did they take anything else?”
I’d bought a huge backpack for him to store his meager possessions, but it was still there, tied to him like always.
“Nope. I took them off to wash up down at the gas station, and when I looked up, they were gone.”
I looked into his worn face, his blue eyes always looked so sad. I couldn’t imagine living like this. Afraid of being inside an enclosed space, even if that space was large.
“Your cough better?” I asked him, wondering if I should ask the team doc to check on him again.
He smiled at me. “You go on, now. I’ll be fine, and I’ll be right here when you get back.”
“Alright. When it warms up, I’ll hook up that outdoor shower for you if you want, and I saw this cool open-air shelter that will protect you from the sun. You can test one of them for me, let me know if it works.”
His grin grew bigger. “We’ll see. Now go on. I need my rest.”
I clapped him on the shoulder and walked away, wishing I could do something more for him. Wish I could do more for them all. I’d donated heavily to the fund to build housing for homeless vets here in the city. But some don’t want a home. Don’t feel they deserve a home. It cracks me in two.
“See ya, Oscar.”
The long corridor winded around past the main offices until ending at the locker room doors. Coach’s voice echoed through the hall as I opened the doors wide. “Good morning,” I yelled into the room, slipping back into smartass mode as easily as Oscar had slipped on those gloves.
Coach stopped his speech to the guys and stared at me in confusion.
Look at me, Coach, here on a day I wasn’t supposed to be. Brownie points? No? Fuck it, I’m here anyway.
“Newman, what the fuck are you doin’ here?” Coach asked.
“I thought you’d be happy to see me,” I taunted.
He narrowed his dark eyes at me. “I’m confused. You show up late when you’re supposed to be here, early when you’re not?”
I lifted a shoulder and leaned against someone’s locker. “I thought about what you said. I could really use more discipline in my career. I thought getting a head start on the training this year would be a good way to start.” My lips curled into a smile. I tried desperately to control my smirk, but it was useless.
“Yeah,” Coach taunted, his hands planted on his hips. “I’m thinking you just want a head start on your party.”
To my surprise, Calvin stepped up. “Having a good switch hitter would really help Luke out on the field, Coach,” he said, nodding in my direction.
I lifted my chin at him in a semblance of a thank you. “That’s true. I’m happy to sacrifice my valuable time to help the youngster out.”
Coach rubbed the back of his neck, as if trying to release some of the tension building there. It was hard to tell if he was worried or just tired. “Don’t have a ticket for you, so—”
“No problem, I’ve already booked my own, and I double checked that my room would be ready early, so I’m good to go.”
Coach nodded and met the eyes of the pitchers. “We leave for the airport in two hours. Finish up your therapy and be ready on the dot.”
I watched him walk into his off
ice, closing the door as he entered. The large glass window gave me the perfect view of him picking up the phone before he reached up and closed the blinds.
I stripped out of my t-shirt and took a spot on an open massage table next to Calvin, not rehabbing but not missing a chance to get some of the kinks worked out.
“Have you talked to Holly?” Calvin asked.
The therapist worked my shoulders, stretching my arm, and rotating my cuff while I tried to brush off the memory of her blowing me off. “Yeah.”
“She know you’re leaving early?”
“Why should she?” I snapped.
“Easy now. I was just wondering.”
The therapist was a short guy, stocky, and his hands felt like meat nubs on the ends of his arms. “Why don’t we have any of those hot lady therapists?” I changed the topic from Holly. Away from the regret I was already feeling for leaving without seeing her first.
Calvin grinned.
I knew my old party pal was still in there somewhere. Whitney hadn’t killed him entirely.
After the massage and a long steam, I took a long shower and stuffed my gear into a bag. The guys were packing up, and Coach was barking orders when my phone vibrated in my pocket.
Holly.
Calvin walked past me, grinning as he glanced over to read the name on my phone. He shook his head, grabbed his bag, and headed out the locker room door with the others.
“C’mon, Newman!” Coach startled me as his hot breath landed on the back of my neck.
I hit ignore.
Brent was already in the parking lot waiting for me when I exited the stadium doors. He held open the back door, I slid in, and pushed my earbuds back in place.
The rest of the team all piled into a stretch Hummer. There wasn’t any part of me that wanted to share a ride to the airport with any of them.
My thumb paused over the screen of my phone, hesitating to hit the music icon. I slid to the recent calls, looked at Holly’s number, and hit call.
“Hey, babe.” Her voice was so deliciously sweet.
“Hey.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t come snuggle with you last night. I just didn’t want to ditch Whitney on my first night here.” Her words sent guilt rolling into my veins, an emotion I wasn’t used to having. Of course she wanted to hang out with her best friend. That was a much better excuse for blowing me off than any I’d ever used to blow her off.
