Finn

by Catherine Lievens

  Finn shook his head. “I don’t really have a family. My parents died years ago and I never really had a home in the clan, just a place in which I sleep. I don’t consider any of them my family, not after the way in which they treated me.” Except for one of them, but he knew Ani would be better without him.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  Finn didn’t think it would be a problem since Dominic accepted humans in his pride, so he decided to tell him. “My mother was human. My father knew she was his soul mate when he first saw her even if she was from another race. So they mated and he left the clan because they didn’t accept mating with humans, or with any other species, really. When I was five my mother died, and my father had just the time to bring me back to his clan and beg for them to take me in before he followed her. I don’t know why they accepted, but they never treated me well.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that. Here you won’t have any of those problems. We have more than one human mate, so you know we are accepting.”

  Finn nodded. He knew now that the way he had been treated wasn’t right, even if it had seemed normal to him until he had started coming there.

  “Now that we settled this, I have a favor to ask from you.”

  Finn frowned. What could the Alpha possibly want from him? He nodded anyway, ready to do just about anything to thank him for his hospitality. “Anything.”

  Dominic smiled. “I saw how easily you related with Jayden, and I know you were friends with Oliver.” Finn thought about the once-human man. He had barely seen Oliver since they had escaped the lab in which they had been trapped. He had tried to talk to him in the beginning, but Oliver had refused any kind of interaction and Finn had had other problems to deal with, so he had let go, but he regretted it now. “He doesn’t come out of his room anymore, not even to eat. He doesn’t talk to anyone and lately he has been refusing to see Jared, the pride’s doctor. I want you to try and get to him, if you can. It’s not good for him to be like this.”

  “I’ll do what I can, but I don’t know if he’ll listen to me. I tried when I first started coming here, but he told me to leave him alone.”

  “I know, but we have to try again. Maybe once your personal problems are solved, you will be able to concentrate on him.”

  Finn nodded then excused himself. He had a soul mate to find, and it terrified him.

  * * * *

  Bryce had been in Keenan’s room plenty of times, but he had never felt so nervous about it, even when he was still trying to get the man back. This time, though...he felt like he was holding the future of the three of them in his hands, and Bryce just knew he was going to fuck up somehow.

  Taking a deep breath, Bryce knocked on the door and waited. The door flung open, revealing Keenan. The beautiful smile that was spread on his face disappeared as soon as he saw that it was Bryce outside the door, and Bryce cursed himself for that. He had been the one to put this distance and this unease between them, when before, everything had always been so easy and fluid. That was when he realized that what he longed for was the friendship the two of them had had, not the love.

  Looking at his ex-lover’s face, Bryce discovered that he didn’t love him anymore, at least not as a lover. Keenan would always be dear to him, but as a friend, or at least he hoped so.

  “Bryce.” Keenan’s tone was cold, something unusual for him.

  “Hi. I, uh, I wanted to talk to you if it’s possible?”

  Keenan frowned. “I already told you I won’t come back to you, no matter what you say. Why don’t you just let it go?” He started to close the door, but Bryce couldn’t afford it. He stuck his foot in it and faced an angry Keenan face on. “What the fuck, Bryce? What more do you want from me?”

  “I wanted to apologize. I know there’s nothing left between us, and I won’t ask you to come back to me.” Bryce watched as Keenan’s eyes widened, the surprise clear on his face.

  “Okay. Come in, then.”

  They both sat on the couch, the silence between them awkward, and Bryce couldn’t help but think that this wasn’t them. It was so far from the fun and affection that they had always shared, and he wanted to get that back. “So, umm, I talked with Dominic.”

  “What’s different this time, Bryce?” Keenan went right to the point, probably not convinced Bryce was really telling the truth.

  “I don’t know, not really. Maybe it needed to sink in, maybe it’s because he told me you were leaving. I don’t know why, but I finally realized I’ve been hurting both you and Finn just because I was stubborn.”

  “Dominic told you I was leaving, huh?”

  “Yeah. If you’re leaving because of me, maybe you can reconsider it? I know how much you like living here, and I won’t bother you anymore, I swear.”

  Keenan smiled, and it had been so long since he had last smiled to Bryce that his heart warmed. They could do this. They could be friends, he knew it.

  “Well, yeah, I’m leaving because of you. I thought that maybe not seeing me anymore would make you realize that you needed to take your head out of your ass and talk to Finn. You’ve been making his life hell, you know?”

  “I know. I’ll try to talk to him after I’m done with you.”

  “Yeah. I know I’m not innocent, either. I avoided him as well as I could instead of making him feel welcome here. I didn’t think about how awkward the situation might become when he finally came and lived here, but I’m getting over it.” The smile Keenan gave Bryce was sad. “I’m getting over you, finally. You certainly didn’t help by not wanting to let me go, but it seems we realized that it would be the better thing to do at about the same time.”

  “I miss being your friend, you know? I know it’s my fault, but I hope we can get that again.”

  There, the smile he got now was the blinding Keenan smile! “I hope so too, and I really want to meet your mate. I have to apologize for making his life difficult.”

  “So, you’re staying?”

  “If you promise that you’re finally over me, I’ll stay.”

  “I promise.”

  “Okay, then. It’s a deal. Besides, I hadn’t really thought about where I would go, you know? And when you make up with Finn, let me know.” Keenan reached over and squeezed Bryce’s hand. “I want you to be happy. Now, go on and find your mate. You’ll need to grovel quite a bit for him to forgive you.”

  Bryce thought about where he could find the Nix once he got out of Keenan’s room. He felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from his chest, but there was an equally heavy one still sitting there, one that only his mate could lift.

  Bryce thought about calling Jamie, but he wasn’t sure the man would answer. Lately he hadn’t wanted to talk with Bryce, and it made him realize how his pigheadedness had impacted more than their three lives. Their friends had also been worried.

  He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn’t see the cat until he stepped on it. Bryce’s foot ended up on Nolan’s tail, or at least he thought it was Nolan. There weren’t any other cats in the mansion, but it seemed that new members were popping in often lately, so he wasn’t really sure.

  The cat yowled and hissed, batting at Bryce’s pants. He danced away from the small claws, not wanting to get scratched. “Sorry, sorry! Umm, Nolan? Is that you?” The cat was black like Nolan, but then all cats looked similar to Bryce.

  The cat hissed again, and Bryce wasn’t sure of the meaning. Did it mean it was Nolan? Bryce crouched down next to the small feline and tried to sniff the air around him. The cat did smell like shifter and like Nolan, but cougars weren’t known for their good sense of smell, so Bryce couldn’t actually tell if the scent really was cat shifter or something else. “Come on, I didn’t do it on purpose, I just wasn’t looking at where I was going. To be honest, I was thinking about Finn. Have you seen him?”

  The cat mewled and Bryce took it as a positive answer. “Can you tell me where he is? I promise I’ll pet you if you tell me.”
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  “I don’t let anyone pet me except Casey, but thanks for the thought.”

  Bryce jumped in surprise, but the cat in front of him chose that moment to walk between his feet and thump him with his head, and he ended up sprawled on his ass right there in the hallway. “Nolan! I thought I was talking with you!” The cat shifter was standing behind Bryce, his shoulder leaned against the wall while the black cat Bryce had been talking too had settled on his stomach and was purring loudly. Bryce looked from one to the other then pointed to the cat. “If that’s not you, then who is it?”

  Nolan smiled and reached down, grabbing the cat and hauling it up in his arms. “It’s Marian’s new cat. It seems she was really happy at having a pet, so when she found out I was a shifter, Carl got her a real one. This is Fluffy.” Nolan grimaced at the name and Bryce just knew there was a story behind it. He would have to go and nag Casey later to make him spill the beans. “By the way, if you had looked better, you would have realized it wasn’t me.”

  “How?”

  “It’s a girl.”

  Bryce let out a booming laugh, not able to control himself. “Sorry, but I wouldn’t have looked under there. What if it was you and Casey caught me looking at your family jewels?”

  “Yeah, yeah. Anyway, I just saw Finn in the living room.”

  “Thanks.” Bryce gave Nolan a little wave but before he could head toward the living room the cat shifter stopped him with a hand on his arm.

  “You’re not going to hurt him, are you?”

  “I’d never hit him!” Was that what the others thought of him?

  Nolan smiled. “I didn’t mean that. You don’t have to hit a person to hurt him—words do as much damage as fists sometimes.”

  In that moment Bryce was grateful that even if he had been an asshole and hadn’t been there for Finn when he needed it, he’d had his friends to help him. “No, I’m going to go down on my knees and beg him to forgive me, then I’ll beg a little more just to have him consider the idea of mating with me.”

  Nolan’s eyes widened. “Well, I don’t know what happened to you, but I’m glad you’re finally coming to your senses. Remember, though, if you hurt him...” Nolan didn’t need to finish the sentence, Bryce already knew that if he hurt Finn again, Dominic was going to boot him out of the pride and the others were going to eat him for breakfast.

  “I swear, I’ll do everything I can to make him happy from now on.”

  * * * *

  Finn had already gone knocking on Bryce’s door, but no one had answered, so he had tried the kitchen, then the living room, and he still hadn’t found Bryce. He decided to go once more knock at the cougar’s suite, but if he still couldn’t find him, he would give up for now. It wasn’t like it would change anything. They had been in this situation for the last four months—a few hours or even days more wouldn’t be a problem, except for the fact that Finn’s heart was longing for his soul mate.

  He had longed for him during all these months, and he’d hurt because of the way Bryce had treated him. Now it seemed that Finn’s body couldn’t be without its mate anymore, like he had reached a point of no return when Dominic had told him that Bryce had changed. Finn was still scared to death that it was all an illusion, but the Alpha was right. Finn might have avoided talking to Bryce just because he was scared to be hurt even more, and he might have passed on the possibility to finally be with his soul mate. He had to give the man this last chance.

  Still, if he didn’t find Bryce, Finn would go back to his clan and pack up the few things he had that were important to him. They were so few that it shouldn’t be a problem shimmer with it, even if it was a box or two, maybe three if Finn decided to take all his clothes with him. He knew that Dominic wouldn’t have problems giving him money to buy new ones if he needed it, but he felt as if he had already gotten so much out of his relationship with the lion while Dominic hadn’t gained anything. Anything except another mouth to feed, that was, and Finn swore to himself that as soon as things were settled he would go out there and find himself a job. It might not be an easy thing to do since he didn’t look completely human, but if he managed to hide his ears under a hat or maybe find a job that wouldn’t have any contact with humans...

  As Finn walked up the stairs and turned into the hallway that led to Bryce’s suite of rooms, he finally dared to hope that from now on his life would be different. He knew no one here would hurt him like Leold and Karun did, and he knew no one cared that he was half human. He might have to keep the tub filled with water to satisfy his need for it, though, but he could deal with it.

  “Here you are.”

  Finn looked up, finding Bryce in front of him. “I...Dominic told me you wanted to talk with me?” God, it was so strange to have his soul mate finally looking at him and talking to him.

  “Yeah...do you want to come in?”

  Finn nodded and followed Bryce into his suite, settling on the couch when Bryce indicated it. Once they were both facing each other, an awkward silence filled the room. Finn wasn’t sure if he had to say something, to be the one to start this conversation, or if he should just wait for Bryce to say what he had to say and go from there. They stared at each other for a while, and Finn could feel himself blushing. He hated his fair skin in that moment. He wanted to be the superior one if Bryce told him he wanted him to go away, but he knew everything he felt was showing on his face.

  Bryce startled him when he raised a hand and skimmed its knuckles on Finn’s face, right over the bruise on his jaw. “Dominic told me you’re having troubles at home.”

  “Yeah.” Finn leaned away. He wasn’t sure he could keep himself in check if Bryce touched him. That soft contact had been enough to make him want to launch himself into Bryce’s arms and never let go. The cougar was so handsome, and Finn used the time it took Bryce to think about what he wanted to say to rake his eyes on his body. He couldn’t see all of it, since they were both sitting down, but he knew Bryce was tall, nearly a foot taller than Finn’s five foot five height. He kept his golden blond hair on the short side, carefully styled in spikes, and Finn couldn’t help but being aware of how plain he was confronted compared with the shifter. He kept his hair long like most of the fae did, since it was easier to hide his ears that way, but his was a dull mouse brown instead of the beautiful blond the other Nix had.

  Bryce was also muscled, lean and sensual with every move he made, while Finn was small and too thin, with little to no muscles. Call him vain, but this house was full of hot men, and he couldn’t help but compare himself to them. Even the smaller ones like Nolan were so much better than him. Maybe Finn could talk with the cat and ask him to help him change things a bit.

  “Okay, if you don’t want to talk about it I’ll let it go.”

  Finn realized that Bryce had waited for him to talk, but instead he had spaced out. He blushed again and reached for the cougar. It was a move based on instinct, and Bryce’s eyes widened when Finn took his hand. He quickly squeezed it before releasing it, but his heart thundered in his chest at the too brief contact and at the sensations it created in him. Finn really hoped Bryce had finally decided to give them a chance, because his body was definitely on board with getting physical. He might be a virgin and embarrassed about it, but he knew he wanted it. “I’m sorry. I—yeah, I have problems at home. Let’s just say that me being half human has always been a problem for my clan and they never pass on an occasion to remind me of it.”

  “They’ve been hitting you because you’re half human?”

  Finn nodded, then explained to his mate the same thing he had told Dominic earlier. He told him about his parents and his childhood, about the short time he had had with them before their deaths, and about what had happened after that.

  “Why don’t you heal yourself?”

  “Because I can’t. I can heal others, but not myself.”

  “Huh. Anyway, you’re not going back there.”

  Finn cocked a brow at his mate. �
�And who are you to tell me what to do?”

  The man grimaced before answering, “Sorry, I know I don’t have the right to tell you what you should do, but I can’t let you be hurt again. I want...I’d like for you to give me a chance. I talked with Dominic and Keenan today, and I realized that I’ve been an ass and that I was wrong. I know we didn’t begin this mating well, but I’d like things to get better. I’d like to get to know you better, and I want you to be safe.” Bryce shook his head. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think my cougar will let you go back home now that we know what happened.”

  Finn opened his mouth to talk, but Bryce stopped him. “I know I don’t have a say in this, and I’m not telling you this to be an ass, it’s just how my cat is reacting. I’ve denied him for so long that now that we finally got close to you, he’s giving me a hard time staying away, even only for this short distance.” Bryce indicated the space between them.

  Finn’s heart warmed. Maybe...maybe Bryce wants me! But he had to be sure. “Are you saying you stopped loving Keenan?”

  “I think I stopped loving him a while ago, I was just too stubborn to admit it. I didn’t like not having a say in who I get to be with for the rest of my life, but I realized that I liked the things I know about you.” Bryce reached out and grabbed Finn’s hand.

  A jolt of...something ran straight to Finn’s groin as he felt the rough skin of the cougar’s hand on his own softer one, making his cock react and twitch in his pants.

  “What I’m saying is I would like for you to give me a chance to prove I finally understand I was wrong. I want to get to know you better, and hopefully one day I want to mate with you.”

  * * * *

  Bryce looked at Finn, hoping that against all odds the man would forgive him, or at least give him a chance. For now Finn looked like a deer in headlights. His eyes were huge and his mouth slightly open, giving Bryce a view of the tip of his tongue. Seeing that tiny bit of pink muscle led to a whole lot of inappropriate thoughts and images of how those pretty lips would look around Bryce’s cock. God, I’m an animal!