Yearning for Love

by Toye Lawson Brown

  Stopping a busboy for directions to the Velvet lounge, he found the room tucked away on the backside of the restaurant. The room lived up to its name with heavy red velvet curtains blocking any visible windows and plush red carpeting covering the floors. A long couch covered in red fabric with tables piecing off sections, lined one wall of the room. Tall tables with accommodations for two filled the other side of the room. The large circular bar was the center of attraction and apparently the meeting place for singles wanting to make a quick hook up and move to the intimate settings of the couch or the tables, each with lit candles sitting atop them.

  Walker waited for his eyes to adjust to the red lights adding emphasis to the redness of the room, to look for Mary Ellen. She wouldn’t be hard to spot in the blinding color maze. He would always see her hair first. The bright white blonde of her hair stood out in any dark room. Plus, she had a ton of hair which she teased high on her head. Mary Ellen was originally from Dallas, Texas where everything was done in big proportions. Not only did she have big hair, but big breasts that he deemed her best asset. And when she wanted her way, she knew how to use them to gain an advantage and win.

  He scanned the people in the bar not spotting her right away. As he turned to leave thinking the text was a mistake, a laugh coming from behind him caught his attention. It was her unique laugh. A high-pitched squeal that made people jump if they’d never heard it before. He turned around not expecting the greeting he received.

  In his mind, he always suspected it, but didn’t want to believe it was true. Holding his composure, he walked to the table to interrupt the couple holding hands. “Well, either you made a mistake and sent out a mass text message, or this is your way of letting me know I’ve been dumped. Which one is it, Mary Ellen?”

  She jerked around on the small barstool barely large enough to fit her butt, almost falling off. “Walker,” she said surprised in the Texan drawl she had not lost since moving to Ohio. “What are you doing here?”

  “I would ask you the same question but I see you and Gary must be discussing the kids again.”

  She slid off the stool when Gary stood up in a confrontational manner. “Oh, my God—the dinner for the wedding party is being held downstairs tonight.”

  He folded his arms across his broad chest. “Yeah, imagine that.”

  “Walker, I did not mean for you to find out this way.”

  He narrowed his brow. “What? You didn’t mean for me find you cheating with your ex-husband with my brother’s rehearsal dinner going on downstairs!”

  “Walker, I forgot where the dinner was being held…”

  “Cut the bull, Mary Ellen! I’m not blind. I want to know how long you’ve been lying to me.”

  “Walker, you have to understand Gary and I have kids together. We have a history together.”

  He motioned with his hands. “So this intimate setting for two is structural and a requirement for discussing the best practices for raising your kids. Don’t play me for a fool, Mary Ellen. If you have learned nothing about me from the eight months we have been together, you know I hate liars and cheaters. I’ve asked you repeatedly if you were messing around with this idiot, and you denied it.”

  Gary moved from his seat to get in Walker’s face. “Back away from my wife before this gets ugly. I would hate to see you carried out of here on a stretcher.”

  Walker didn’t blink an eye. “If you have balls that big then, bring it on.”

  Mary Ellen squeezed between the alpha males separating them. “Stop it. There is no need to fight over me. Walker, please don’t make this harder than it has to be. Gary and I have been talking, and we think if we go back to Dallas, we can make our marriage work this time.”

  He backed away from her hand before she could touch him. “Whatever, Mary Ellen; this is the reason I didn’t give all of me to you. But your boys I cared about.”

  “My boys have a father and don’t need you!” Gary spat.

  Walker shook his head. “You’re right they don’t need me and I don’t need this crap. I’m out of here.”

  “Walker, wait,” Mary Ellen called after him. “I will be leaving Cleveland in a couple of days for good.”

  “Good luck,” he said hiding his pain from her.

  “Please don’t think I didn’t care about you—I do. In my heart, I have always loved Gary. We made a mistake and divorced in haste. We want to get our family together again. You can understand that right?”

  “I understand you used me until you made up your mind what you wanted.”

  “No, I didn’t do that. It is breaking my heart to do this to you.”

  “I know, I hear it cracking as you speak,” he said mockingly.

  “Walker, I don’t want to leave without the boys saying goodbye. They care about you too.”

  He thinned his lips as his anger grew. “Just go and don’t do me any favors by pretending you or your boys give a care about my feelings.”

  She ran her hands up his arm comforting him. “Walker, you are a wonderful man. You deserve a woman with only you on her mind and no other baggage in her life. I know she is out there and waiting for you to find her.”

  He turned away from her and walked out of the room not looking back. The pain from the knife penetrating his heart dulled him from showing any emotion as he took the stairs to the first floor and outdoors. The freezing temperatures didn’t faze him as he paced the parking lot forgetting his car keys were in the pocket of his coat.

  Leaning against his snow-covered car, his cell phone rang. He kept his voice low to keep the despair ripping through his body from showing. “Yeah, what’s up, Jeremy.”

  “Where are you?”

  “Um, I needed some air. I’ll be inside in a minute.”

  “Hurry up; we’re about to have dinner.”

  “I’m on my way,” he said clicking off the phone.

  The cold weather suddenly embraced him as he began to walk towards the restaurant. He stopped when he saw a woman fall down on the snow-covered sidewalk. The adrenaline kicked in when the woman didn’t get up immediately. Rushing to her side, he kneeled down recognizing it was Nicole. “Nicole, are you okay?”

  Her eyes appeared glazed over as she stared at him not speaking. “Nicole, can you hear me? Are you hurt?” He asked her without getting an answer.

  Walker picked her up and hurried inside the restaurant. “Someone call 911 now! He shouted to the first person he saw.

  Jeremy and Patty rushed from the dining room. Patty ran over to him. “Nicole! Desmond, help her; she's diabetic. Where is her purse, she probably has insulin in her purse,” she said panicking.

  Desmond rushed over to help as Walker laid her on the floor. “She is crashing. She didn’t look right to me when she said she wasn’t feeling well. Alicia, get my bag from the car and hurry,” he instructed his wife who jumped into action.

  A waiter found the purse outside and handed it over to Desmond. He removed the case containing insulin, syringes, a glucometer and a vile of glucose. Pulling off her glove, he prepped her finger to test her blood sugar. “Her glucose level is extremely low. I have to get it up before she lapses into a coma.”

  Desmond removed the vile of glucose filling the syringe while Patty and Walker freed her arms from the sleeves of her coat. “Okay, Desmond, we have her arms free. You can give her a shot of insulin,” Patty said holding Nicole’s head in her lap.

  “She is hypoglycemic; a dose of insulin would kill her. I have to get sugar in her system,” he said pulling her dress up to expose her stomach.

  Walker’s eye widened. “Dang, Doc, do you have to pull her clothes up in front of everyone?”

  “This is the quickest way to get the glucose in her system,” he said cleaning an area on her stomach with alcohol before penetrating it with the syringe.

  “All right but can all you people, please turn around and give the lady a little respect,” he said shooing the onlookers forming a circle around them.

  The manager hande
d Desmond a glass of orange juice. “Doctor, is there anything else I can do to help? EMS is on the way.”

  “Do you have an empty room where I can take her? When she comes around she will be disoriented, and I agree with Walker, she will need privacy to get herself together.”

  “You can use my office,” the manager said.

  Walker watched Desmond struggle to lift Nicole’s body up from the floor. He wasn’t a big man. His short stature and thinly built frame didn’t carry much muscle. Walker shook his head moving Desmond aside to sweep Nicole in his arms. “Lead the way to your office,” he instructed while balancing the unconscious woman carefully in his arms.

  Chapter Two

  Nicole opened her eyes. She didn’t immediately recognize the faces hovering over her or calling her name. “Nicole? Welcome back—you gave us quite a scare young lady.”

  Her head was dizzy, and her vision blurred as she tried to ascertain her surroundings. “Nicole, look at me. I’m Desmond; I’m a doctor, remember. Your sugar was dangerously low, and you passed out. I want to transport you to the hospital as a precaution.”

  “No hospital,” she mumbled. Her tongue felt thick and her mouth dry as she tried to speak in sentences that were coherent.

  “You don’t want to go to the hospital? Is that that what you said?”

  Blinking she tried to sit up. The blood pressure cuff around her arm was tight, and the hand holding her down crushed her chest. “Let me up, please.”

  Desmond refused and leaned over her checking her eyes with a bright light. “Get a plate of food,” he said to his wife. Cleaning her finger with alcohol, the small lancet pierced her skin letting a single drop of blood stain the test strip before sticking it inside the glucometer. He waited for the meter to beep before saying, “Her blood sugar is coming up. She may not need to go to the ER if she will eat something.”

  She pushed his hand away and won the fight to sit up on her own. The room spinning prevented her from getting to her feet. “I want to go to home.” Her words slurred as her body slumped forward.

  “Nicole, you are in Cleveland for my wedding tomorrow. I will take you to my house so you can rest,” Patty said.

  Nicole kept her head low avoiding the eyes staring at her. “I remember where I am now. I ate a granola bar earlier; I guess that wasn’t enough.”

  Patty laughed. “We’re in an Italian restaurant and you’ll be full of carbs in a few minutes. I’ll sit with you while you eat.”

  “Patty, I ruined your dinner party. Will you be able to forgive me?”

  “Honey, it’s my fault. I should have made sure you ate earlier. You had that long drive from Columbus and we spent hours at the church. Can you forgive me for neglecting you?”

  Patty hugged her almost smothering her. “Patty, I can’t breathe. Please, go to your guests. I will be okay. Once I get myself together I will join you.”

  Patty turned to her brother-in-law. “Desmond, will she be okay alone?”

  Desmond placed a tray that had a generous helping of lasagna, salad, a glass of tea, and dinner rolls in front of her. “She will be okay as long as she eats as much of this food as possible. I will check her blood levels later to see how she is doing.”

  Nicole’s shaky hand placed the tip of the fork in the lasagna to break off a small piece and put in her mouth. “See, I’m eating. Go to your guests. I promise I will be okay.” She went for a second fork-full of lasagna. She was starving, and the food was delicious.

  “Well, all right, but I will be back in a few minutes to check on you.”

  “I’m feeling better already,” she said giving a timid smile.

  “Okay. We’ll leave you alone to get your senses back, but call me if you need me.”

  Nicole crossed her heart feeling silly. “I will.”

  Nicole finished half of the lasagna, all of the salad and drank half of the tea. She didn’t eat the bread after downing the pasta filled with three meats and gooey cheese. Moving the tray aside, she got up from the small couch to get to the mirror behind the door. Her legs felt weak, but she managed to stand and walk without falling.

  Fixing her dress the embarrassment of facing a room full of strangers who’d seen her at her worst did not fancy her. She faithfully took her insulin and ate right to avoid having these types of episodes. This one was a mistake—she’d been working all night and didn’t have time for a full breakfast before hitting the highway.

  The door opened as she fingered loose strands of hair on her head. “Nicole?” A deep male voice called out.

  She stepped from behind the door. “I’m right here.”

  “Do you remember me? I’m Walker,” he said closing the door. “I wanted to check on how you were doing?”

  “Yes, I remember you. I don’t lose my memory when I pass out from not eating.”

  “Does that happen often? I mean I’m no doctor like Desmond, but diabetics should eat a lot right?”

  “You’re half right. We’re required to eat healthy and not gorge ourselves on certain foods. I usually do eat throughout the day, but getting Patty’s gown finished and rushing to make sure I packed everything for the wedding, I forgot to eat a meal last night. I pretty much snacked until I fell asleep at the sewing machine.”

  Walker leaned against the front of the desk crossing his feet. “Well, I see I will have to keep an eye on you tomorrow. We don’t want a repeat of this. I didn’t know what was wrong with you. When I saw you fall, I thought you had slipped on some ice or something.”

  “You saw me fall outside?” Nicole forced her eyes to look at the man who’d saved her from freezing to death in the snow. His long legs stretched out in front of him appeared thick and muscular through the dark chocolate corduroy pants. The brown and caramel cashmere sweater covered a broad chest and shoulders to taper to a slim waist and thin hips. She didn’t see a wedding ring or any jewelry other than a watch.

  “Yes, I was outside when you took your tumble. How are you feeling?” He asked standing straight.

  Her eyes met his as he straightened to a height of over six-feet and maybe three inches. Walker’s facial features were dynamic. A perfectly straight nose, prominent cheekbones, and lips too full to belong to a man, curved at the corners just right when he smiled. A mass of dark, almost black, locks whispered lightly over his brows and curled down the nape of his neck. His eyes were the color of her navy-blue dress and stared back at her waiting for an answer. He was a handsome man with a baritone voice. A man she dared not flirt with so soon after making a decision to join the world of the living. If she didn’t want people asking questions, she had to remain a fly on the wall and not get close to anyone at this wedding.

  “I’m better now that I’ve eaten. I was fixing myself up to join the party although I’m embarrassed.”

  “Shoot, don’t be embarrassed for having a condition you can’t control. Be embarrassed if you fell out because you were drunk. Why were you outside anyhow?”

  It was moments such as this that she wished she hadn’t cut her hair to make bangs. She would be able to hide behind the long shags had she not gone chic when bangs became the must-have style. “I wasn’t feeling well and thought the cold air would stimulate me a little. I don’t know how to thank you, Walker. As cold as it is outside, it wouldn’t have taken long for me to freeze to death.”

  “No need to thank me. If I wasn’t outside trying to cool my head, I would not have seen you fall.”

  Nicole rolled the sleeve of her dress down to cover her arm and noticed his demeanor was off from earlier in the day. “Well, lucky for me you were outside. Walker, is there anything wrong? You seem a little upset.”

  His eyes traveled over her with undisguised interests. Nicole felt her cheeks grow warm under the soft light of the small office. He shook his head. “Nah, nothing is wrong really.”

  “What does that mean? I’m a good listener if you want to talk,” she said sitting on the couch and crossing her leg over the other to put on her boot.

>   Walker watched her zip the first boot up her leg encased in black tights. “I kinda got dumped tonight. I find it funny how she waited to do it tonight of all nights.”

  “That’s sad. She could have waited until after the wedding to do it.”

  He ran his fingers through his hair messing the untamed locks. “I don’t think her intention was to dump me tonight. She accidently sent me a text message meant for her ex-husband. Once I got to the bar, I got an earful of what I didn’t want to hear.”

  She zipped the other boot and smoothed the hem of her dress over her thighs. She wasn’t sure what to say to a man that’d been dumped. A woman would cry over a glass of wine and a photo of the love she lost. But men were an odd species when it came to expressing their feelings and responded differently when dumped. “Well, is there any way to repair your relationship with her?”

  “I can’t compete with the father of her kids. But, it’s cool. We haven’t been going out that long. Quite honestly, I didn’t count on the relationship going anywhere.”

  “Then think of it as not having to deliver the breakup news to her. You won’t have to deal with her emotions this way.”

  He smiled for the first time since confronting Mary Ellen and Gary. “I didn’t think of it that way. If you don’t have a date for the wedding, maybe we can hang out? I will be able to keep an eye on you tomorrow.”

  Nicole noticed the dimples in his cheeks. Those sexy dimples stirred her insides as she said, “I don’t have a date for the wedding since I don’t know anyone but Patty and Jeremy in Cleveland. But, you don’t have to babysit me.”

  “You know me now, and I hardly see you as a baby.” He walked over and sat next to her on the couch. “You don’t have to join those people in the dining room if you aren’t feeling up to it. I can take you to your hotel.”

  “I would love to go to the hotel and sleep for a few hours. I haven’t had a diabetic spell in a while, and I forgot how tired I am after recovering from one. But, I’m here for Patty and I can’t let her down on her day.”

  The door opened after three quick knocks. Patty entered with Jeremy following behind her. “You’re sitting up,” she said happily squeezing between Nicole and Walker on the couch. “I wanted to check on you but Walker beat me here. And look, the plate is almost clean. Are you feeling better now that you have eaten?”