Ignite Me, Fireman

by Sylvia Fox

  I said yes.

  Chapter Eight

  Everything was perfect. Blaze was perfect….my god was he perfect. My heart was perfect. My body felt one-hundred percent blissfully perfect. Sighing, I snuggled further into Blaze’s arms, feeling more relaxed than I had in a very long time.

  Who needed rules and a structured plan for life when you could have moments like this? Not me, that was for sure.

  Blaze shifted sideways and faced me, his eyes soft and warm. He gave me a lazy smile and traced circles on my skin. I sighed against his touch and lifted my nose to brush against his. I was so happy that my heart might burst at any moment.

  “You’re so beautiful, Poppy,” Blaze said, whispering his sweet words underneath the sound of the roaring fire. “I’ve never seen a more beautiful woman in my life.”

  “Well, it’s not like you see that many out here in this cabin of yours,” I teased. In the past, I never would have had the guts to say something like that to Blaze, but after the past two days spent wrapped in each other’s arms, I felt close to him. We felt like two halves of one person now, ready to take on whatever the world might throw at us.

  He laughed out loud and tickled a spot below my ear. “Laugh at my secluded lifestyle all you want, sweet stuff, but I know you love it here just as much as I do.”

  “You’re right. I do.” Sighing, I sucked in a deep breath of fresh pine-filled air, enjoying the warmth rolling across my body from the flickering fire. Until now, it felt like I’d been far too focused on things that didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things, things that would never lead to happiness, at least not for me. Here in the wilderness with Blaze by my side, my mind finally felt like it was calm and still and no longer clouded with too many voices that were not my own. It didn’t run a million thoughts per second, and the knots in my shoulders were gone.

  All this time I’d thought I needed to join the rat race to be happy, but instead, I’d found my place in a cluster on trees perched on the side of a mountain, in the arms of a man I’d never thought would want me in a million years.

  But he did. He wanted me over and over and over again, if his enduring libido was any indication…

  “Why don’t you just stay here with me, sweet stuff?” he asked, playing with my hair. “I know the cabin doesn’t have a TV or the internet, but you haven’t missed those things while you’ve been here so far. Have you?”

  Was he serious? He couldn’t be serious.

  But his tone was measured and calm. This wasn’t a joke. Blaze truly wanted me to stay here with him, and he hadn’t hesitated even a moment in letting me know. Me. Living in Blaze’s cabin. With him. It was my own fantasy come to life, and my heartbeat flittered as the thought sunk into my addled brain. It seemed so at odds with reality, imagining my buttoned-up, rule-playing self casting off my old life to join this specimen of a man to live off the land alongside him.

  Could I do it?

  Could I actually leave everything behind to be with him?

  It seemed impossible, but my heart didn’t care. It wanted to say yes.

  A phone began to ring, breaking the moment between us. Blaze frowned and sat up, glancing at the kitchen counter where his cell was blaring wildly. He didn’t have a landline installed in the cabin, but he kept a cell by his side at all times just in case the fire station needed him to rush in for an emergency.

  “Sorry, sweet stuff.” Blaze hoisted himself from the floor. “Duty calls.”

  But when he picked up the phone, the serious expression on his face eased just a bit. “False alarm. It looks like a foreign number. Must be your parents calling me back.”

  Shit. My parents. They must have finally gotten our messages about the house catching fire.

  “Blaze here,” he answered by way of greeting. “Hi Tim. Yep, that’s right. It’s okay, I got her out safe. Yep, it’s alright. I swear she’s sitting right here next to me. Uh huh. Yep. Sure thing, buddy. No, no, that’s probably for the best. Yep, got it. I’ll let her—Tim? Hey, buddy, you still there? Hello?”

  He held up the phone and cursed. “Damn signal cut out again.”

  I stood from the floor and clutched the flannel shirt to my chest, suddenly embarrassed about being very naked in front of Blaze Marshall while he was talking to my father on the phone. “What did he say? Is he mad?”

  “He was more worried about you than anything.” Squinting his eyes, he held up the phone even higher and shook his head. “Service is out again. Sorry, sweet stuff, I was about to pass the phone on to you.”

  “So, he wasn’t mad?” I repeated.

  “No, not mad.” Blaze tossed the phone to the counter and pulled me into his arms. “Now, where were we?”

  “Hang on.” I pushed at his chest and took a step back. Didn’t he realize how important this was? “What did he say?”

  “He wanted to know if you were okay and where you were. I told him you were safe with me and not to worry. They’re getting on the first flight out of Paris which leaves in about an hour.” He stepped closer. “Everything’s fine, sweet stuff. Now drop that shirt to the floor and get back in my arms.”

  “They’re coming back? Now?” My heart thundered in my ears. Shit. This wasn’t good. If they left now, they’d be back by morning, which meant that my time with Blaze was going to come to a screeching halt much sooner than I’d thought.

  “You seem upset.” Blaze frowned, making the corners of his dark eyes crinkle. “I thought you’d be pleased they were coming back to Timber Bluff early. They can take stock of the house and hopefully salvage some of what’s left.”

  My mind reeled. How did Blaze not understand why my parents’ early arrival would only ruin everything that was happening between us? It was like he lived on a different planet than I did, one where girls could fall in love with their parents’ best friends.

  “Blaze,” I said quietly, balling my hands into fists. “I’m upset because when my dad gets back to Timber Bluff, we won’t be able to see each other anymore. I don’t know about you, but that kind of puts a damper on the whole parents-ending-vacation-early thing.”

  His frown deepened. “What the hell are you talking about, Poppy? I thought I made myself clear. I have no intention of ending things with you. Not when Tim gets back. Not ever.”

  My heart couldn’t take it. It both soared and ripped at his words. It was everything I’d wanted to hear from him, but it didn’t change the fact that we could never follow through on what he said he wanted. What I wanted, too. With my parents out of town, we could ignore the reasons we could never be together, but we couldn’t put our heads in the sand and act like this was forever when it was anything but.

  “Yeah, but don’t you know what Tim will have to say about that? I’ll give you one guess, and it’s not going to be ‘Congratulations’ or anything like it.”

  “I don’t care what the hell he has to say about it, sweet stuff.” Blaze opened his arms and tried to pull me close, but I shook my head and stepped back.

  “He’ll kill you. And after he throws you into the coffin, he’ll never look at me the same again.” I swallowed hard, tears threatening to spill down my cheeks. “I…I care about you, Blaze, but I love my father, too. If he cuts me out of his life because of this, I don’t know how I could handle it. It would destroy me.”

  Blaze went still and quiet as my words echoed between us. They’d come out completely wrong, but I didn’t know how to explain what I meant. My feelings for Blaze were unlike anything I’d ever felt in my life, and I knew deep down that I was unlikely to feel that way ever again. I wanted him, I needed him. I’d finally figured out the life I wanted, and it was right here in this cabin by his side.

  But I also loved my father. And I couldn’t lose him just as much as I couldn’t lose Blaze.

  I was between a rock and a hard place, and the hard place was looking at me like I’d just slapped him in the face.

  “So, what the hell was this, Poppy?” Blaze’s arms rippled as he cro
ssed them over his massive chest. “A fucking joke? A way to pass the time?”

  “No. Of course not.” I squeezed my eyes tight. I’d really stuck my foot in my mouth this time, and I didn’t know how to get it out. “I have feelings for you Blaze, and I wish I knew how to make this work.”

  “Feelings?” He coughed out a harsh laugh. “You mean you enjoyed the way I fuck. That was all it was to you, wasn’t it? I opened my heart to you, Poppy, and all you wanted was a meaningless fling. I can’t believe what a fucking idiot I’ve been.”

  Panic gripped my heart. Moments ago, everything had been perfect. Happiness had wrapped around my heart, holding it in a gentle, warm embrace. But everything had gone cold faster than the sun had dipped below the horizon, and the urge to flee from this horrible moment made my body begin to shake.

  I had to get out of here. If I had to stare at Blaze’s pained and angry face a second longer, I was afraid that I might break.

  Chapter Nine

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered before sliding my arms into the flannel shirt. Grabbing my jeans and shoes from the floor, I tried to blink away the tears. But it was no use. They were pouring down my cheeks, leaving hot streaks in their wake.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing now?”

  “Leaving,” I said so softly I wasn’t sure he’d be able to hear. “I can’t stay here. Not anymore.”

  “The hell you can’t.” Blaze’s voice was harsh as I reached the door. “It’s freezing outside. You don’t have a car. Even if you did, the snow is coming down hard, and it won’t be safe to drive until the morning.”

  “Then I’ll walk.” I ripped open the door, and a blast of icy air hit me in the face.

  “Don’t be a fucking idiot, Poppy.” Blaze’s voice had risen to a shout. “It’s miles to town, miles to the next house.”

  “I know.” Another tear hit my face. “But I can’t stay here. Not after this.”

  And with that, I walked out of Blaze’s cabin and the life I knew I’d always regret leaving behind. But not only had I hurt myself, I’d hurt him, too. And I couldn’t face staying in his bed knowing what I’d done to the both of us, especially not after how happy we’d been only half an hour before. He thought I’d used him, thought I didn’t care.

  Little did he know just how deep my feelings ran.

  I trudged through the snow and pulled the flannel shirt tight around me. It was freezing. Blaze hadn’t been wrong about that. And it was snowing hard. But I’d walked miles before, and I could do it again now. All I had to do was reach Rachel’s house, which was about three miles south of where we were now. It was where I should have gone in the first place two days before instead of holing up with Blaze in his cabin.

  I only got half a mile before I realized I’d made a terrible mistake. I didn’t have a coat. I didn’t have a scarf. I didn’t have gloves. Hell, I didn’t even have particularly thick socks.

  I was freezing.

  Snow clung to every inch of my exposed skin, and my lips felt numb and cracked. Shivering, I stopped in the middle of a cluster of trees, eyeing up the invisible road. I couldn’t see it through the thick cloud of ice and snow, and I had to admit that I might have turned the wrong way at the last bend.

  Blaze had been right. I’d been an idiot to leave.

  “Poppy.” His voice called out from behind me, and I turned with my heart in my throat. There he stood, like a rugged knight in flannel armor, his beard caked in snow. He held a thick coat in one hand and his axe in the other. I wasn’t entirely sure what he meant to do with that axe, but I’d never been happier to see one in my life.

  Even though I felt like a monumental fuck-up.

  And even though I could still read the hurt in his eyes.

  “Get the fuck over here now or I swear I will throw you over my shoulder and carry you back home if that’s what it takes.”

  I didn’t need any more encouragement. Shivering, I clomped through the snow back to his side. He sighed and stared down at me, his expression difficult to read. He looked mad. Really mad. But he also looked like he wanted to wrap his arms around me and kiss the cold right out of my blood.

  But he didn’t.

  “Look.” He sighed and closed his eyes. “I know you want to leave because shit just got complicated, but you’re going to have to wait until tomorrow. If you swear you won’t try to leave again, then I’ll swear to leave you to yourself tonight. You can sleep in my bed, and I’ll sleep on the couch. I’ll keep my damn hands to myself like a fucking gentleman, even though I think you’re throwing away something pretty damn great.”

  He widened his stance as if he thought I’d turned and flee from his words.

  “Okay,” I said. “Take me home.”

  Blaze was true to his words. When we got back to the cabin, he shoved me into the bathroom to warm up and didn’t pop his head in once. And when I finally emerged, he handed me some clean pajamas and suggested it was time for bed.

  But even though it was well past midnight, I couldn’t relax enough to sleep. All I could think about was the look on Blaze’s face when I’d said we couldn’t see each other once my parents got back into town. It was a look that said far more than he’d ever voiced aloud, making me wonder if his feelings for me ran as deep as mine did for him.

  He’d said he wanted me to stay, he wanted us to be together, he wanted us to face down my father’s reaction like it didn’t matter at all.

  I rolled over and pressed my face into the pillow to try to block out my thoughts, but his pine and snow scent engulfed me. It brought back memories of the night before, the hours we’d spent exploring each other’s bodies with our hands, our tongues, our hearts. My body yearned for his presence, betraying my resolution to stay tucked up in this bed all alone for the entire night.

  I flipped over onto my back and stared up at the ceiling he’d built with his own two hands. Hands that were soft and rough at the same time. He had callouses on his fingers, evidence that he liked things rough and dirty. Blaze didn’t do anything half-assed. He put his heart and soul into everything he did, and preferred to work hard for everything he got. He was tall trees and clear sky and blazing fires that warmed me to my toes.

  I had to go to him.

  Sliding out of bed, I felt my pulse begin to race. The floor was cold under my bare feet, but the heat in my chest kept me warm. I padded out of the room and saw Blaze standing at the back window, staring out at the mountainscape dotted with stars. The snowstorm had calmed as I’d tried to sleep, and there was a crisp and clear silence in the air that brought a clarity to my clouded thoughts.

  “You can’t sleep either?” he asked without turning around.

  “No, I’ve been wide awake for hours.” I took a few more steps toward him before I stopped in the middle of the room, suddenly nervous. I’d hurt him. I knew I had. Just because I’d realized I’d been wrong didn’t mean he’d welcome me back with open arms. “I’m sorry.”

  He let out a long sigh that his entire body showed. “It’s okay, Poppy. I’ve been thinking through things tonight, and I do understand why you said the things you did. He’s a good man, your father. I wouldn’t want to lose him either.”

  “Maybe we wouldn’t,” I said quickly, afraid that if I didn’t speak, he’d take my earlier words to heart.

  He turned then, facing me with a glass half-full of whiskey. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, maybe I was wrong. Maybe we wouldn’t lose him over this. Maybe we could make him understand why we want to spend our lives together.”

  A beat passed before Blaze answered, and I felt my heart had gone on pause as I waited for him to speak. I didn’t know what I would do if he’d changed his mind, if he’d decided that he didn’t want to be with me after all, if I’d hurt him too much.

  “Are you saying what I think you’re saying, sweet stuff?” His voice had softened, and the fear in my heart disappeared. “You want to try and make things work?”

  “I’ve never wa
nted anything more.”

  Chapter Ten

  Life was wonderful. A sexy man’s arms were wrapped around me. The birds were chirping outside of the window where sun streamed in from a sky devoid of smoke and smog. The air was laced with fresh pine, snow, and masculine cologne. And Blaze was outside chopping wood, preparing for another cold day in this haven of winter wonderland.

  Wait. Blaze was in bed next to me, so how could he be outside chopping wood?

  “What’s that?” Blaze murmured as he blinked open his eyes and shifted up on the pillows. “What is that incessant noise?”

  The cobwebs began to clear in my mind, and the noise became louder. Someone was knocking on Blaze’s front door. I glanced at the clock. It was six in the morning. Who the hell would be stopping by for a visit at this time of day?

  Blaze eased out of bed, my eyes caught on his perfect ass. “It’s your dad. He’s here.”

  My heart skipped a beat. Even though we’d decided to face this head-on together, it didn’t stop me from being nervous as hell about my father’s reaction. Best case scenario, he’d throw his hands up and yell at us for awhile before he realized that the world wasn’t going to end just because his daughter was dating his best friend. That scenario would suck, mostly for the yelling. But I also had some worst case scenarios in mind that put the utter fear into my heart.

  “Okay, it’s time.” Blaze squeezed my hands and met my eyes, his dark pupils swirling with determination. “Just stay calm. We can get through this together. I’ll do the talking. You don’t have to do anything other than stand there. Okay, sweet stuff?”

  I swallowed the lump in my throat. With Blaze by my side, I could do this. “Okay.”

  “What the hell took so damn long?” My dad rushed into the cabin and wrapped his arms around me before I even had a chance to say hello. “Poppy, are you okay? Are you burnt? If you so much as have a scratch on you, I swear I will sue the living daylights out of whatever idiot started that goddamn fire.”