Beyond the Sunset

by Anna Jacobs

  ‘I’ll just nip round the back for a minute or two,’ he said. ‘Now that you can see how little space there is, maybe you’ll feel differently about me joining you here. I can always sleep with the other men if you’ve changed your mind. We’re within earshot, you know. You’ll be quite safe.’

  She thought better of him for giving her a chance to change her mind but she still wanted him nearby, so she unfastened his bed roll and spread it out before she got into her own. It was perfectly respectable to lie like this, each sleeping in a separate nest of blankets. Why, they weren’t even touching one another.

  Other people might not see it as respectable, though, she admitted as she snuggled down, shivering, but she knew it was perfectly innocent, which was what mattered most.

  She didn’t try to get undressed, relieved that her clothes had more or less dried while they were eating their meal in the farmhouse, but she did take off her boots. Why did you always feel the cold more when it was damp? Shivering, she pulled the blankets up round her neck, trying to ignore the lack of a pillow and the hard planks beneath her.

  Zachary came back, stared at his unrolled blankets then nodded, as if accepting her decision. He took off his boots, blew out the candle and slid into his blankets. ‘Good night.’

  ‘Sleep well.’

  She was still shivering, tried to tell herself she was getting warmer, but knew she wasn’t. She was so cold she couldn’t get to sleep, but tried to keep still and quiet so as not to disturb him. After a few minutes his voice reached out to her through the darkness.

  ‘Your teeth are chattering, Pandora, and you’re shivering so hard I can feel it.’

  ‘I’m s-sorry if I kept you awake.’

  ‘I’m sorry you’re so cold. Look, if we combine our blankets, you can lie cuddled against me. I’ll soon warm you up. I never seem to feel the cold and I’m quite cosy already. I’d not touch you in any way that’s wrong, I promise.’

  ‘Oh, please, yes.’ She’d do anything to get warm again.

  She got even colder as he rearranged the blankets, then he lay down again beside her and took her in his arms, pulling her close. Shivers still racked her, but as she nestled against him she sighed with relief as the blessed heat of his body began to warm her.

  ‘That’s better, eh?’ he said a short time later. ‘You’ve stopped shaking.’

  ‘Much better.’

  He chuckled, the air from his laughter blowing against her temple and sending a shimmer of awareness through her body.

  She tried to dispel the feeling with a joke. ‘You make a wonderful hot brick!’

  ‘I’ve been called a lot of things, but never a hot brick before. There it goes, raining again.’

  ‘It’s not reaching us, though.’

  ‘They built this house cleverly. But I still wouldn’t like to have no neighbours nearby.’

  ‘Neither would I.’

  Silence fell, a companionable silence punctuated only by the sound of his soft breaths. ‘I’ve missed having someone to chat to at night,’ she confided. ‘Until Cassandra got married, I’d always slept with one of my sisters.’

  ‘I’ve never slept with anyone since I was a lad. There’s just me and my sister, you see. After Dad died, Hallie started sleeping in the same bedroom as Mum, so I’m on my own in the other one.’

  ‘It’s lonely on your own. Dark thoughts creep into your mind in the middle of the night.’

  ‘Is that what it’s been like for you lately?’

  She nodded, realised he couldn’t see that in the dark and offered him words instead. ‘Yes. It’s nice to see Cassandra so happy, of course it is, but I miss her dreadfully. I’m going to miss all of them.’ A sob escaped her.

  ‘Shh now. No more crying. What can’t be cured . . .’

  ‘. . . must be endured.’

  ‘My gran always used to say, “Just be grateful you’re alive and well”.’

  ‘We never knew our grandparents. And my mother died when I was seven. But there was always Cassandra to look after me. She’s been a wonderful older sister.’

  ‘Well, now you’ve got me to look after you – until we get to England, anyway.’

  ‘You’ll still be there even after we get back. I mean, you’ll be working in the shop, after all.’ The silence that followed those words was so long, she prompted, ‘Won’t you?’

  ‘I don’t know. If Harry is made manager permanently, I shall need to look for another job.’

  ‘You definitely don’t like him.’

  ‘Let’s just say chalk and cheese.’

  ‘Why won’t you admit how you feel about him?’

  He sighed. ‘Because it’s not fair when he isn’t here to defend himself. After all, Mr Featherworth thought enough of him to make him manager.’

  ‘And thought enough of you to send you to the other side of the world to find us. To me, that sounds as if the lawyer trusts you more than Harry.’

  Another silence, then, ‘I hadn’t thought of it like that.’

  It seemed obvious to her. ‘Don’t do anything in haste after we get back, Zachary. Promise you’ll discuss it with me first if you feel the need to leave.’ It suddenly occurred to her that it wouldn’t be up to Mr Featherworth to appoint a manager. It’d be her responsibility. She was part-owner but had full power over running the shop, thanks to those papers signed by her sisters. That thought made her catch her breath, but she didn’t speak it aloud, just hugged the idea close that she needn’t lose Zachary after they got back. But she’d not say anything yet. He might not like the idea that she favoured him. He might not want her . . . affection.

  She realised her attention had wandered. What was he saying?

  ‘. . . so I’d never act hastily, Pandora, not with my mother and sister to think of. They depend on me for everything.’ He hesitated, then added, ‘That’s why I can’t think of marriage. All the lads I grew up with are wed, but I can’t support a wife, let alone children, much as I’d like to.’

  She knew he was saying this as a warning – but was he warning her or himself? With a sigh of bliss for how much warmer she now felt, she snuggled against him. He was so comfortable to lie with, so . . .

  When she woke in the morning it was to the shrill sounds of a flock of white-tailed black cockatoos shrieking and squabbling in the gum trees nearby. She’d seen them often enough now to recognise their calls. It was just getting light and . . . Zachary was gone.

  She hadn’t even noticed him getting out of bed. She touched the blanket where his head had lain, so close to hers, but it was cold now. Smiling she remembered how they’d chatted, how he’d got her warm when she felt as if she was never going to be warm again.

  And all this without misbehaving in any way. But then she’d known he wouldn’t do anything to upset her. She’d trust him with her life, was trusting him with her life.

  Alice went down to the kitchen after breakfast to discuss the day’s duties with Dot.

  ‘Miss, did you hear anything last night?’

  ‘No. What sort of thing?’

  ‘Middle of the night, it was. Someone in the back yard of the shop. I’d have been fast asleep but that cat down the road was making such a noise.’

  ‘I didn’t even hear that.’

  ‘Well, your bedroom’s at the front. Anyway, I was lying there, trying to get to sleep again when I heard a sound. That back gate creaks a bit when you open it. I went to peep out of the window and that’s when I saw a man in the back yard of the shop.’

  ‘Could you see who it was?’

  ‘No, miss. Let alone I didn’t dare move the curtain more than a crack, there was no moon. I just saw a figure, a man.’

  ‘What did he do?’

  ‘I could only see him in the yard, couldn’t see the back of the shop, but he went towards the shop and after that I didn’t see him for a few minutes. Then he went away again, carrying something.’

  ‘Was he a burglar, do you think?’

  ‘I nipped out into the yard
this morning but the back of the shop didn’t look as if it’d been broken into.’

  ‘Hmm. I’ll mention it to Mr Dawson. Don’t say a word to anyone else.’

  ‘No, miss. I’d never dare. Only you’ve been that good to me, I don’t like to keep anything back from you.’

  ‘I’m glad you don’t. You’re a good worker, Dot. I’ve never had a maid as hard-working as you. And you don’t need telling what to do, either, you just get on with it.’

  The girl blushed bright red, trying in vain not to smile.

  Alice was left very thoughtful. She would definitely mention it to Ralph Dawson when she next saw him.

  It was strange, knowing something was going on next door but not being able to put your finger on what was wrong. She was glad of the new door between the two halves of the building, though. Very glad.

  But she still locked her bedroom door at night and she knew Dot still took a poker up to bed with her.

  Was Prebble stealing from the shop? Why? He had a good job there. Wasn’t that enough? But who else could it be? Only he had a key to the side and back gates.

  What would happen when the new owners returned?

  Prebble seemed to think other people were fools and had a way of looking at her scornfully that made her want to give him a sharp set-down. But she didn’t. Mr Dawson had matters in hand and wanted her to act as if nothing was the matter.

  It was raining again when they set off that second morning. Pandora still felt shivery and huddled down on the seat, with her shawl wrapped tightly round her head and upper body.

  Zachary looked at her in concern. ‘Are you all right? You’re very quiet this morning and you look a bit pale.’

  She shrugged. ‘I can’t seem to get warm, whatever I do.’

  ‘We could get a blanket and wrap it round you.’

  It took her a minute or two to think this over. Even her mind seemed to be working slowly today. ‘Yes. That’s a good idea.’

  He edged over into the back of the cart and opened his blanket roll, pulling out the thickest of the blankets.

  ‘I think I might have caught a cold,’ she said as he put it round her shoulders.

  He looked at her in concern. ‘I hope not. But you do look heavy-eyed.’

  ‘I’ll be all right. A cold’s not much fun, but it won’t make any difference to our travel.’

  Each time they stopped that day, he fussed over her. They were all chilled and wet, so Bert lit a fire and brewed a pot of tea at midday.

  By the time they started looking for somewhere to stop for the night, Pandora was feeling feverish and longing for nothing but to lie down.

  They found a farm with a hay barn where they could stay, but when Zachary asked if Pandora could sleep inside, the woman stepped back a pace.

  ‘I don’t want to catch her cold. She’ll be fine in the barn.’

  ‘Can you bake us some damper?’

  ‘I’d have to charge you for it,’ she said grudgingly.

  ‘We can pay.’

  The barn was a draughty place, however, and even Bert grumbled about the area where they were told to sleep.

  Leo shared his concern between Pandora and the horses. ‘She needs a hot lemon and honey drink,’ he said. ‘My mother always gives me hot lemon and honey when I’m not well.’

  ‘We don’t have any.’

  ‘We could ask the people at the house.’

  ‘They’d not give us any even if they had it. You don’t often meet mean devils like them in the country.’

  Bert and Leo put their sleeping rolls to one side of the sleeping area and left Zachary to bed down with Pandora.

  ‘I shouldn’t sleep close to you,’ she said. ‘I don’t want to give you my cold.’

  ‘I never catch colds. And you need to get warm.’

  The trouble was, one minute she was shivering, the next she was too hot. She kept apologising for disturbing him, but he was much more disturbed by his worries about her. If she fell ill, it might make them late for the ship, so what should he do? Press on, or stop somewhere and risk letting her rest for a day or two?

  In the morning Pandora was worse, and though she tried to make light of it, he could tell that it was a huge effort for her to get up.

  ‘I’ll go and ask them if we can stay here another night,’ he said.

  ‘No! I’ll be all right. I can lie down on the back of the cart.’

  ‘You’re not all right. You need to be in a warm house, not out in the open air on a cold day with rain threatening. Even this barn’s not good enough.’

  But their host grew even more unfriendly when he saw that Pandora was ill and refused point-blank to let them stay longer.

  ‘I can’t have my wife getting ill. She gets a bad chest if she catches a cold. It was one of the reasons we came here. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to move on.’

  Furious, Zachary tried to make a warm place for Pandora on the back of the cart, and this time, she lay down in it with a sigh, murmuring that her head was aching. But when he turned to keep an eye on her, he could see that the jolting was making her wince sometimes and she looked so pale he was very anxious.

  ‘We need to find somewhere to stop and look after her,’ he said to Bert. ‘She’s not at all well.’

  ‘I’ll ask at the next mail post. They may know someone who’ll take us in. But it’ll make us late.’

  ‘Then we’ll have to be late! We don’t want her cold to turn into pneumonia.’

  Before they got to the next mail post, it began to rain heavily, so they covered Pandora with a tarpaulin and Zachary went to crouch in the back of the cart to hold an umbrella over her face.

  It was a miserable, sodden party who arrived at the next mail stop, and to Zachary’s relief, it was suggested that they try the wife of a nearby settler, who had a reputation for looking after anyone who was ill, because it was days’ travel to the nearest doctor.

  Granny Pithers took one look at Pandora and asked Zachary to carry her inside. ‘Shame on you for taking that poor young woman out in weather like this! She’ll be lucky if she doesn’t get congestion of the lungs. What were you thinking of?’

  ‘The people whose barn we stayed in wouldn’t let us stop any longer when they saw she was ill.’

  ‘Well, I don’t call that Christian behaviour, I don’t indeed. Good thing I have a spare bedroom. Your wife can sleep on the bed, but you’d be better on the floor.’

  ‘She’s – um, not my wife. We’re engaged to be married, but were waiting till we got back to England.’

  ‘You should have done it before you started. Still, I think she’ll be better with you nearby, so you can bring your bedroll inside. Your friends can sleep in our barn. Will that young man be all right?’

  ‘Leo will be fine. He’s really good with horses.’

  ‘Well, that’s a blessing.’

  Pandora snuggled down in the soft bed and fell instantly asleep. Granny came to check on her several times and Zachary slept very lightly, waking at intervals to make sure Pandora was all right.

  ‘We still need to set off in the morning,’ Bert insisted as they sat over an excellent evening meal of kangaroo stew.

  ‘You’ll leave when she’s fit to travel and not before,’ Granny said severely. ‘There will always be another mail ship, but there might not be another Pandora if you don’t allow her to recover properly. Such a pretty name. I must tell my niece. She’s expecting a child next month. You’re lucky you caught me at home. I’m going to stay with her for the birth. I do enjoy a birthing.’

  Zachary kept counting off the days left to get to Albany. Would they get there in time? Would it be enough? Or should they abandon the attempt, return to Westview and try for the next mail ship?

  It would all depend on how quickly Pandora got better. She must get better. He couldn’t bear it if anything happened to her. Not only was Mr Featherworth trusting him to take her safely back to England, she was . . . Pandora.

  He had no right to care about her
as he did, and he’d never tell her how he felt, but he couldn’t help loving her. It had been agony to lie beside her soft body, wanting to touch her, love her.

  What a fool he was! He’d be trying to fly to the moon next.

  14

  To everyone’s relief, Pandora was a lot better the following morning and insisted on travelling on. She lay in the back of the cart, well wrapped in blankets, claiming she was all right. Granny had given her a small chunk of smooth rock, which they’d heated before setting off and wrapped in some old rags. They reheated it in hastily lit fires whenever they stopped for a meal that first day. It became very sooty, but it made a huge difference to Pandora’s comfort.

  Again they travelled till nearly dark, which meant they couldn’t overnight at the places where the mail cart changed horses. With time so short they didn’t dare stop before dusk.

  Pandora listened dreamily as Bert explained that mail stations were sited where you could find water all year round, which was important in the hotter seasons. It seemed strange to her to have some rivers which only flowed in the winter. Some of the stations were known only by their distance from Perth: 113 Mile or 131 Mile.

  To her relief, it didn’t rain and they were fortunate enough to find shelter in farms that night and the following night. And though they had to sleep in barns, these were better built and less draughty.

  Each of those nights Leo and Bert made their beds together away from them without anyone asking them, and Zachary held her in his arms. And if she was guilty of exaggerating how cold she felt, she didn’t care. She loved sleeping close to him and was, she admitted to herself, in love with him. How quickly that had happened!

  But he gave no sign he cared for her in that way and she was trying to work out whether this was because he didn’t share her feelings or because he couldn’t afford to care for any woman?

  Surely the money she’d inherited wouldn’t stand between her and an honest man? If that was what was making Zachary keep his distance mentally, she’d have to do something about it. She wasn’t going to let foolish pride stop them.

  But did he love her?

  She wanted the same kind of companionable happiness that Cassandra had found with Reece, longed for it quite desperately. It would have been worth all the agony of coming to Australia if it brought her someone to love and make a life with.