My Love Forever

by Anna Antonia

  Her gaze hardened. I saw the merciless woman who’d survived all the horrors life had bestowed upon her.

  “That damned agent shot Damian, believing he was a low-level associate of Grigor’s. He probably thought he could use it to jockey for a bigger cut with the Volkovs since the Konstantinov head was no more.”

  “Wait. Were the Volkovs the ones who killed Grigor?” Just the thought of it made my stomach turn.

  “No.”

  “Then who?”

  Elaine clasped her hands. Her lovely face turned marble. Emotionless. Inhuman.

  “I did.”

  The air went out of me. Before I could remember how to breathe again the phone rang.

  50

  DAMIAN

  “Iliya. He’s there?”

  My father’s former rival cut me a glance. “In one piece.”

  “Damian?”

  Hearing Elaine’s voice be as calm as always, as if I wasn’t standing in a room of fucking Volkovs because of her and her goddamned machinations, lit me on fire.

  “What do you want, Elaine?”

  “I imagine you’ve deduced it by now.”

  “Elucidate. Let us all hear how very clever and diabolical you are, Elaine.”

  “You should be kinder, Damian. We have someone you’ll want back.”

  Risa.

  “What do you want in return?”

  “Two-hundred and fifty million. I’ll send you the account number. You know what to do.”

  I attempted to keep my breathing even though I ground my teeth and tightened my grip on both pistols. Elaine, the woman who’d trained me to be the perfect specimen of manhood, turned out to be nothing more than a common thief.

  “What do they get?”

  “A commission for taking wonderful care of your Risa. I’m sure you saw how happy she was with Sascha. You haven’t done anything rash to abuse their hospitality, have you?”

  She mocked me. Bitch.

  “They’re all in one piece. For now.”

  I threw out a warning glare to all the men staring me down. It made sense why they hadn’t simply shot me dead when I broke in here.

  My value was stronger than my poor manners apparently.

  “Good. Meet me at ten tonight. Sascha and his people will escort you to the drop point.”

  “You must think the bullet in my brain took away my reasoning as well. I’m not going anywhere with the Volkovs.”

  “You will if you want to see Risa again.”

  51

  RISA

  Why the hell was Elaine deliberately baiting Damian into a fury? Did she want him to lose his mind along with his temper?

  This conversation was wreaking hell on her. Even though Elaine’s tone remained light, frosty even, her shoulders dropped along with her head. Misery soured the air.

  Every callous word out of her mouth existed in a vacuum of lies.

  My beloved Damian’s voice dropped into a vicious growl. “It was always about the money for you. No wonder you never tried to be a mother to me.”

  She flinched, but her voice stayed cool. “Make it three-hundred for your insolence.”

  Damian didn’t balk. “Done. Put Risa on the phone.”

  Elaine turned to me and held her cell out. I took it. Licking my lips, I searched for the right thing to say. My imagination failed me.

  “Damian?”

  I heard his breath leave his body harshly. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes. I’m good.”

  “I’m coming for you.”

  “I know.”

  There was so much I wanted to say. I wanted to let him know about our baby and of course, Elaine. My throat tightened. I couldn’t share any of it. Not until it was over.

  Maybe not even then. Not if Elaine had her way.

  She held out her hand. Our time was up.

  “Be careful, Damian. Don’t do anything reckless, okay?”

  “Be good, Risa.”

  The kindness in his voice disappeared as soon as Elaine got back on the line.

  “See? She’s safe and sound.”

  “Are we done?”

  “Just one thing.”

  “What?”

  Elaine closed her eyes. She kept them closed as she said, “You’re right. I never tried to be your mother because you were simply a job. I’ve more than earned my right to be free after almost thirty years. Thomas too.”

  “Good riddance to you both.”

  “Oh and Damian? Keep your temper in check when you’re with the Volkovs. They were hired to guard Risa. Not you. I doubt they’ll have much patience with you as they did her. And just in case that’s not warning enough—attack the Volkovs and I’ll put a bullet in Risa’s brain myself. Unlike you, she won’t get back up again.”

  This set him off.

  “Harm Risa in any way and you might as well turn that gun on yourself. It’ll be a mercy compared to what I’ll do to you.”

  “Then play nice, Damian. Go with the Volkovs and we’ll finish our transaction. I’ll go my way and you’ll go yours.”

  “You’ll get your money, but know I’ll hunt you down for this. You’ll never know a moment’s peace. Run far, Elaine, and live in fear.”

  She tightened her lips. Her entire body swayed to the left before she straightened. “Ten o’clock. Don’t be late.”

  I waited until she slid the phone back into her coat. “You were unnecessarily harsh.”

  “I did what I had to. As always.” Elaine straightened her sleeves and smoothed down her skirt.

  “Is that how you rationalized killing Grigor?”

  Sadness dimmed her eyes. “I had to be the one. No one else could do it.”

  “Why you? He could’ve hired anyone. Hell, Marcus would’ve done it without a second thought. Why you, Elaine?”

  “Because he asked me to.” She coughed once, as if clearing her throat. Or suppressing tears. “We don’t have much time before we leave. I’d like to finish our conversation.”

  Even though I didn’t agree with her methods or the distance she kept, I wanted the same. Besides, it’d be a waste of time to steer her where she didn’t want to go. “Please do so.”

  “The problematic sector in the FBI has been tracking Damian, just waiting to pounce. They were the ones that sent the assassin to your apartment. Thomas and I have needed this month to lay a trail down to exonerate Damian.”

  A bit more confusion cleared. “You’re laying the trail straight to you.”

  “Yes.”

  “And this tattoo on my back?”

  “Marcus brokered it for us. It’s your safe card, Risa. As long as you have that mark, the FBI will keep you and Damian under their protection.”

  Wait! I thought that’s who’s threatening Damian. Why would they help us?

  I asked her as much. Elaine answered, “One faction tried to take Grigor and his son down. I’ve gotten another to take them down tonight.”

  The threads crisscrossed. I saw the patterns, but the picture still didn’t fully emerge.

  “I have a weapon in my body and I still don’t know what it can or will do. More importantly, how dangerous it is.”

  Elaine waved one hand. “Anyone tries to take you, Risa, you can bring every electronic device down. Cell phones, computers, vehicles—if it has a computer chip then you can control it. If you were tortured or killed as a result, those nanos will release the equivalent of an EMP. You’ll crash everything within a ten-mile radius.”

  I shook all over. Marcus briefly explained to me something along these lines, but I wasn’t really sure it wasn’t more than theoretical.

  “Why would you give me this kind of power?”

  “Why else? With your mark, Damian can take whatever data he wants from whoever he wants. He can dominate the world stage, Risa. He will sit at the head of every table because no digital secret will be safe from you—if you want it.”

  A cold shiver snaked down my spine. “I wouldn’t because I don’t want this kind of power,
Elaine.”

  “Be that as it may, this kind of power is better in the hands of an ally rather an enemy. Certain people understand that. Certain don’t.”

  “And then it’s over? No one else will be coming for Damian?”

  “He will be protected.”

  “What can change that?”

  “Nothing. I promise you, Risa. You and Damian will be free to live your lives together as you wish.”

  It was everything I wanted to hear. And yet…

  “What about you, Elaine?”

  A bittersweet smile took hold of her lips. “There’s always a price to pay in life. Always. I’ve had far more than I ever deserved. I had wealth that I didn’t have to earn on my back, freedom, a partner, Grigor’s friendship, and most of all—Damian. I got to be his guardian when I didn’t deserve it. My bill has finally come due. I’m more than willing to pay it.”

  “Elaine, you said there were five people whose lives were destroyed. Who is the fifth? Thomas?”

  “No, not him. Although he’s my husband, Thomas is not a man of passions. His experiences in the brothel ensured that he doesn’t need physical contact the way others might. We have an understanding and have lived by it for thirty-two years. He’s known my feelings for Grigor and understands them completely.”

  “Then who?”

  Elaine’s throat bobbed. She clutched her hands, fingers tangling against each other before stilling. “You know him. He was with you all those weeks in Switzerland.”

  My memory scanned through all the people I met. It stopped and stuttered on one person.

  52

  DAMIAN

  It was done. Any doubts I had concerning Elaine and Thomas were dead. I let myself have this one moment of grief and nothing more.

  Everyone heard Elaine’s dismissal of our life together. I’d be humiliated if I wasn’t…what was this feeling?

  Hurt.

  Iliya drew my attention back to him. “It’s as I told you. Your woman is not here, but we will take you to her. Sascha, Ivan, and my soldiers will be there to make sure it all goes to plan. We’ll do our transaction and our business will be done.”

  Good. I had a target for my messy emotions.

  “We’ll be done, but I warn you—I won’t forget this. Any of it.”

  Iliya’s surface-friendly grin faded. His expression hardened at the corners. “Do not start a war that can’t be finished. Live your life. It was bought and paid for with blood.”

  Condescending words of a man who knew he had the upper hand.

  Sascha, Ivan, and his crew moved about. I looked over at Wolffington. His stare communicated how badly he wanted to snap my neck for not listening.

  Perhaps I deserved it.

  But this was just a job to him. Risa was my life.

  “Naturally, your men will not go with us. You understand of course.”

  I cut back to Sascha. “Of course.” That cost me much to say, but I’d keep a tally. The bill would come due on the Volkovs.

  There wasn’t anything else to say to him.

  I turned my attention back to the man I’d hired to help me. We didn’t exchange a word but the message was clear.

  “Wolffington, you heard them. You know what to do if I don’t come back.”

  As much as I would’ve loved to set these mercenaries onto wiping the Volkovs from the face of the Earth, their main and only priority would be to protect Risa and her family if I didn’t return.

  Which was more than likely considering I was going to walk alone in a setting of my enemies choosing.

  Just as I passed Iliya, he spoke to me in Russian.

  “Your father was a great man.”

  The words and the language pained me. More so because Iliya spoke the truth.

  “He was.”

  I walked out of the suite, refusing to follow these men any more than I absolutely had to.

  There was no guarantee I wasn’t walking the same path that took both my parents away. I accepted it as my fate as long as Risa was free.

  She was and always would be the only person that mattered to me. Even if it cost me my life.

  53

  RISA

  “Leon.”

  How many layers were there left to uncover? Would it never end?

  “Yes. Leon is my…my son with Grigor.”

  This time I couldn’t contain my shock. “Your son!”

  “Yes. I conceived him on that terrible day. Two months after he was born, I gave Leon to his father. It was only fair. Grigor lost his wife and child because of me. This was the least I could do to make it right.”

  My head spun, but my heart just kept hurting with every one of Elaine’s confessions. How she managed to survive each day with this kind of hurt was beyond me.

  “How does he feel about it? Leon, I mean.”

  “I don’t know. We’ve never been close.”

  “But he knows the truth.”

  “Yes. He knows.” Elaine relaxed her shoulders. The posture didn’t do much to conceal the fact she looked like she was about to break apart. “Apparently, he carries the burden of his conception as well as the fact he wasn’t the preferred son. Simply the spare.”

  “That can’t be true. Grigor must’ve have loved him to pieces. No man who has sacrificed as he had would love any of children any less.”

  “Grigor acknowledged our…my son. That was a sign of great respect. He made him strong, showed him the business. It was more than either of us could’ve ever asked for.”

  I thought of Leon growing up in the criminal underbelly when he could’ve grown up alongside Damian. I thought of Elaine having to deny the son she had with the man she loved.

  These were the decisions that shaped the man I loved. No wonder Damian was a puzzle I could never solve. How did any of this make sense in a normal world?

  “But it’s not right, Elaine. You both deserved so much more.”

  “I can see you believe that. This is just one reason why Damian loves you so.” She sighed. “I have a story to share with you. One when Damian was little, about five years old. He was unhappy because his nanny put him down for a nap. I was on my way up when I heard him say very clearly, ‘My father is powerful. His name is Grigor Konstantinov and he will be upset with you for treating his son this way.’ He was so proud of himself when she sprang up in fright.

  “Justina was from Lithuania but she’d heard of the Konstantinovs. Naturally, I had to fire the nanny and pay her off. Damian had never broken the rules before, not like this, and because of it the nanny he loved had to go away.”

  My heart ached for the little boy Damian had been. “Did you tell him it wasn’t his fault?”

  She let out a humorless laugh. “Of course not. I told him exactly why Justina had to leave and that it was because he’d broken the rules. He never broke them again. Not even for you.”

  It all seemed so senseless.

  “Things may not have turned out this way if Damian had only told me the truth. I would’ve never run from him in the first place. He wouldn’t have been in France and I would’ve never left New York. No matter how many times he rejected me.”

  Elaine looked at me with tired eyes. “You still don’t understand. Damian falling in love with you set this whole plan in motion. There was only one way for this to end, Risa. No matter what path you and Damian took, or didn’t take, you both would’ve ended up right here. Your fate was sealed from the moment he first saw you.”

  54

  DAMIAN

  The ride was hell.

  Stuck in a vehicle with the Sascha and Ivan while having to keep from throttling Sascha tested my will. My seething fury didn’t penetrate the Volkovs’ icy control. Thank God for small miracles.

  Otherwise we’d all be dead because I was still armed.

  These assholes thought me so little a threat they didn’t bother to take my weapons. The odds were on their side—three SUVs loaded with Volkov soldiers versus me.

  I was on my own.

&nbs
p; About an hour before we arrived, Sascha dared break the oppressive silence. “May I ask you a personal question?”

  A clipped nod was as much as I was capable of.

  “How is one person worth all of this?”

  “You wouldn’t understand.”

  “Clearly.”

  I could’ve left it at that. “She is a part of me. I could no more leave her behind than leave my right arm.”

  “People survive amputations.”

  I dismissed him with “It’s a waste of time explaining it to someone like you. You wouldn’t understand unless you let yourself have a heart.”

  Sascha didn’t say another word.

  We were once alike. Sitting in this vehicle, riding to my likely doom, I was glad for the difference. I never wanted to go back to an emotional land of ice.

  If this fails that’s exactly where I’m going.

  I thought the past month was hell. I was wrong. Hell was the man beside me, cut off from anything truly worth feeling.

  I thought I could remake Risa into a creature of my own making. How arrogant.

  Apparently, I’d become hers.

  55

  RISA

  “Would it help if I told you I regret it now, Risa? There many things I wish I could’ve done differently, but never did I make my decisions thinking they’d harm Damian. Never.”

  I understood the weight of regret and because of that, I couldn’t help but once more reach for her hand. She startled again. It was now obvious to me her stiffness was a result of being unused to another human’s kind touch.

  How could I ever judge this woman when all Elaine ever wanted was love? Manipulation, sacrifice, duty—these were the only way she knew how to give it.

  I squeezed her slim fingers and whispered, “I know you did the best you could.”

  “The best? Maybe. It’s terrible that this was the best I could do.” Elaine looked away from me, as if the love I had for her was too much to bear. “You cannot be another Justina. You must be build a life with Damian, Risa. I trust you to be there for him, to love him in the ways I could not.”