The Balance Project

by Susie Orman Schnall

  “And I apologize. I can’t say I worked too hard to squelch that rumor.”

  “That’s all right, Lucy. I can see why everyone thought it was me. I know I’m not the best at being, how shall we say this, nice. Unfortunately, it’s not enough that I’m overqualified for my job, an effective negotiator, and a competent manager,” she says with frustration. “I have to be nice in the workplace, too. You never see anyone complaining that the men around here aren’t nice. Just another double standard for women in the workplace. Anyway, I don’t know why it’s hard for me, but I’m working on it.”

  I smile.

  “So what are you going to do now?” Maggie asks.

  “I’m interviewing for a job in digital media. That’s what I’ve wanted to do with my career this whole time.”

  “That’s great. Good luck.”

  “Thanks, Maggie. I appreciate it.”

  “I’ll see you around, Lucy.”

  “See you around.”

  She starts to walk away and then she stops. She walks back to my desk, looks around to see if anyone can hear her, and says to me quietly, “You know, if the new job doesn’t work out, I’d love for you to consider working for me.”

  “For you?” I say confused.

  “Yeah,” she smiles widely and gestures toward Katherine’s office. “It’s still not public. The press release goes out Monday.”

  “Wow, Maggie. Congratulations. That’s great.” Huh, the new lady.

  “Thanks.”

  “Well, if things don’t work out with the digital-media job, I’ll let you know.”

  “Sounds good. See you later.” She smiles and taps her hand on my desk.

  Strange times. Strange times.

  Thursday, a couple of days later, I have my interview with Ash, and it goes really well. I’m able to answer all of his questions articulately, I pose a few well-thought-out questions to him, and I am confident with my proficiency in all of the skills he puts forth as necessary for the job.

  “You did great,” Sera whispers to me when I walk out of Ash’s office after the interview.

  “Thanks,” I say. “How’s the competition?”

  “Pretty steep, actually. Not gonna lie. Lots of people from outside Green Goddess. I think you’re the only internal applicant. But you’re the only one with a recommendation from the COO of the company.”

  “Former COO,” I say.

  “Whatever. Anyway, I heard him talking to Joan from HR, and they’re going to make a decision by the end of the day tomorrow.”

  “Well, hopefully it will be good news for me,” I say.

  “Hopefully is right. It would be nice for us to be in the same department,” Sera says.

  “Agreed. Wish me luck!”

  “Good luck, Lucy!”

  Later that day, I’m helping Evan with a project, trying to keep busy when my phone line rings.

  “Hey, it’s me.”

  “Hey, Katherine. How are you doing?”

  “Really well. Beyond really well. There’s something I actually want to talk to you about. Can you come over after work? Maybe around six?

  “Sure. Can you tell me what it’s about?” I ask curiously.

  “Nope. Can’t. You’ll have to wait and see,” she says, barely containing the glee in her voice.

  “Do you want some tea?” Katherine asks when I arrive at her apartment later that day. She’s wearing ripped skinny jeans and a tailored white button-down shirt, her feet are bare, and her blonde hair is in a high ponytail.

  “Have any coffee?”

  Katherine laughs. “Sure!”

  As we walk to the kitchen, we pass her dining room. I stop short in the doorway as something catches my eye. The long dining table is covered with two open laptops, empty plastic Glow juice cups scattered around, stacks of papers, and what look like piles of letters. This is most definitely headquarters for some sort of operation.

  “Oh, that,” Katherine says when she sees me staring. “That’s what I want to talk to you about.”

  We walk into the kitchen, and I sit at her counter on a tall stool. Katherine stands on the other side of the counter and starts preparing our drinks.

  “First, and I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but I don’t think it’s going to work out with the digital-media job with Ash.”

  “Really?” I say, and my shoulders immediately slump down. I’m stunned. “You spoke to Ash?”

  “No.”

  “Then how do you know that?”

  “I have a hunch.”

  “Katherine, what are you talking about?” I ask completely confused.

  “The reason I don’t think it’s going to work out with the Green Goddess job is because you’re about to get another job offer that I hope you’re going to find more compelling,” she says, a wide grin spreading across her face.

  “What?” I ask, not following.

  Katherine stops what she’s doing, puts both of her hands flat on the counter, and looks at me. “How would you like to be the director of digital media for a new organization I’m starting?”

  “What? Seriously? What do you mean?” I ask shocked.

  “Well, I’ve been doing a lot of reading and soul-searching over the past several days, and I’ve decided that I want to start a new organization whose mission, among other things, is to affect substantial change in this country for working women. It’s going to be called Project: Balance. And I want you to start it with me.”

  Katherine and I spend the next half hour discussing her vision for Project: Balance and her vision for my role. I am so impressed by how much thought and work she’s already put in, and I’m excited by the prospect of what I would be able to add as a woman from a younger generation. I also love what Katherine outlines as the plan for the website and her offer that I take ownership of all things related to it.

  “You should also know that I hired an assistant this morning so you would have no administrative duties, besides what we would all pitch in and do together, considering it’s a start-up. I’ve loved having you work for me for all these years, Lucy, but you are most definitely ready to have more responsibility and ownership over your projects.”

  “I really appreciate that. I’ve learned so much from you and you’ve given me so many opportunities, but I do not want to be someone’s assistant anymore.”

  “I completely understand. And you’ve more than paid your dues.”

  “I hope I’m not speaking out of turn, Katherine, but what’s to stop you from getting completely overwhelmed in this job? Especially since it will be your own company. Won’t you be swamped and isn’t that exactly what you said you don’t want your life to be like anymore?”

  “Fair question. And I’ve thought about it a lot. I am profoundly committed to making considerable changes in my own life, to make it more balanced. And since part of the mission of this organization is balance, I will ensure that our lives are sane. Predictable hours, time for our family and friends and ourselves. No more crazy lives, Lucy. I promise that. I know that sounds unrealistic since it’s a start-up and there will be so much work to do, but I won’t sacrifice us for the sake of the work. Slow and steady. It can be done that way.”

  “There’s so much to digest. Can I have some time to think about it?”

  “Of course. Go home and think about it, and tell me when you’re ready. No pressure. But I know you’d be great at the job, and I would love for you to start this with me.”

  I leave Katherine’s and decide to walk home to think over everything she proposed. The new organization sounds incredible and the job opportunity is exciting. But there are downsides to working for a start-up and for, rather with, Katherine. It’s a lot to think about. Nick and I are having dinner tonight at Carlo’s so I’m looking forward to discussing it all with him. I have a feeling I know what he’s going to recommend.

  I stop for a coffee and as I wait in the long line, I check my Instagram feed to see Ava’s post of the day. The hairs raise up on my arm
s and a wave of excitement rushes through my body when I read what Ava and Deepak Chopra want me to understand: All great changes are preceded by chaos.

  Epilogue: Six Months Later

  “Welcome back to Today. Our next guest is Katherine Whitney. Welcome, Katherine,” Matt Lauer says.

  “Thanks, Matt,” Katherine says with a glowing smile.

  Katherine looks flawless. But different. She’s wearing a pair of dark skinny jeans, a gorgeous but simple white blouse, a chunky gold necklace, and a pair of charcoal-grey leather ankle booties. She looks casual but hip. Perfect.

  “So, a lot has transpired since the last time we talked,” he says.

  “It certainly has,” Katherine says, laughing.

  “For those of you who haven’t been keeping up with Katherine Whitney, all five of you, I’ll give you a rundown of what’s happened in the last six months.”

  The camera zooms in on Katherine. She’s sitting back in her chair, legs crossed, looking cool and confident.

  Matt continues, “Katherine Whitney was the darling of corporate America the last time she and I spoke six months ago. She was the COO of Green Goddess & Company, the multibillion-dollar health and wellness company based here in New York City but with restaurants across the country and in London, a website, juice bars, a magazine, and so much more. And she was celebrating the six-month anniversary of the launch of her bestselling book The Balance Project. She was also a fixture on New York City’s social and philanthropic scene, and a shining role model for working women everywhere. But everything changed for Whitney in what seemed like the blink of an eye. After a scathing exposé in the New York Post this past April that called her out for being a fraud, Whitney decided to come clean. She did so at an awards dinner. Katherine, why don’t you talk a little about that night.”

  “Well, Matt, in the course of a few days last April everything changed in my life. When I wrote The Balance Project, my life was very balanced. I was doing everything I wanted to do. My kids and my marriage were doing great. My job was fantastic. All the pieces of the puzzle were in place. But soon after that interview I did with you to celebrate the anniversary of the book, my life started to get difficult. I was in denial for a while. And it took that Post article, a cancer scare, and the wise words of Dr. Elaine Ireland to jolt me out of my haze and open my eyes to what was really going on. I honestly hadn’t realized until then that what I was doing with The Balance Project and what I was doing through my speeches were actually having a negative effect on women. My intention had always been to help women. I figured that my life was so full and I was able to do it all, and I wanted to share that with other women. Well, it turned out I was wrong.”

  “How so?”

  “It’s unsustainable. Sure, there are times in your life when everything is going smoothly and it all seems very well-balanced. But those times aren’t the norm. The norm is when things are crazy at work, or when your carefully coordinated child-care plan hits a snag, or when your husband feels neglected. That’s the reality for women out there. And I learned that by telling women, as I did, that it was absolutely possible to have it all and do it all and have your life in perfect balance, I was doing them a disservice. Because trying to live up to that ideal only makes most women feel badly about themselves, incompetent even. And that’s not good for anyone.”

  “So tell us about the night at the Ellevate dinner. The night you, essentially, blew your cover.”

  “I was so honored to be given the Working Woman of the Year Award. But as my name was called and I was heading up to the dais to give my speech, I realized I could no longer pretend that my life was perfect. And balanced. So I started telling the truth.”

  “You finished your speech that night by saying that you hoped you had made some amends and that you looked forward to making more. What did you mean by that?”

  “Honestly, Matt, at the time I said it, I had no idea. But a lot has changed since then.”

  “In what way?” Matt asks.

  Katherine uncrosses her legs and sits up straighter. “Well, right after that speech, I quit my job at Green Goddess. It was a heart-wrenching decision. I was one of the founders of that company, and I love it with all my heart. But I knew that what had been going on with me would become a distraction for the company. I also knew that I could no longer do the job I was doing at the level that it needed to be done. So after a lot of soul-searching, I decided to quit. I didn’t know exactly what I was going to do next. In fact, I was in a complete haze of self-doubt and confusion about how I wanted to live my life.”

  “Then what happened?” Matt asks.

  “I started reading the letters I had begun receiving after the Ellevate speech. I had been letting them pile up in my dining room. I hadn’t read them because I thought they would all be so hateful. But I’m thankful for whatever compelled me to not throw them away.”

  “What did the letters say?”

  “There were all kinds of letters, actually. Mostly positive,” she laughs. “I did receive a lot of hate mail, to be fair. But for the most part, women from all over the world wrote me and thanked me for talking so publicly about what it’s truly like to be a working woman. They told me they felt validated. And they told me that rather than it being the case that women can’t have it all because there aren’t enough hours or because the systems in place don’t allow it, they wished that instead of that being our fate, that we could change the systems. That’s when I had my lightbulb moment, and I decided what I wanted to dedicate my life to.”

  “So tell us what you’re doing now.”

  “Well, a short while after I left Green Goddess, I founded an organization called Project: Balance,” Katherine says proudly.

  “And what is that?”

  “The mission of the organization is to affect policy changes in the American corporate structure to support the unique position working women find themselves in, whether they are mothers or not. There have been a lot of cosmetic changes and lip service in American corporations over the past years in terms of making the workplace better for women. But what’s needed, and what Project: Balance is aiming to do, is create radical changes, truly out-of-the-box changes that will, for once and for all, stop hindering women from realizing their full potentials.”

  “Isn’t that a little ambitious? How are you going to do that?”

  “Hell, yeah, it’s ambitious. But that’s what’s needed in order to create serious change in our corporate infrastructure. A lot of other countries are doing this way better than we are. Our first initiative for Project: Balance, and I’m beyond excited about this, is a competition. A huge competition, actually. We’ve put out a call for radical, groundbreaking ideas to affect change. And we’ve provided incentive in the form of a cash prize of two million dollars. Twelve American companies have put their money where their mouths are and are sponsoring this competition: Green Goddess, American Express, Amazon, Facebook, Procter & Gamble, General Electric, Nike, Estée Lauder, Google, Whole Foods, Johnson and Johnson, and Apple. And we’ve assembled a judging panel made up of politicians, business leaders, and women’s advocates, people like Maria Shriver, Sheryl Sandberg, Dr. Elaine Ireland, Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Sara Blakeley, Kirsten Gillibrand, Melinda Gates, Indra Nooyi, Arianna Huffington, Ellen DeGeneres, Meg Whitman, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Tory Burch. The competition went live on our website last night, and we’re so excited to see what the brightest minds come up with.”

  “Wow, that sounds like an amazing plan.”

  “Thank you, Matt. We’re very excited.”

  “So everything has turned out well for Katherine Whitney after all,” Matt says.

  “It has, Matt,” Katherine laughs. “Six months ago, I couldn’t have imagined that this is where I’d be, but life has a funny way of working itself out.”

  “It does, indeed. Thank you, Katherine Whitney, for joining us. Will you come back soon and give us an update on Project: Balance and the competition?”

  “I would
love to.”

  “And this is Today on NBC.”

  Cut.

  I click off of Hulu where I’d been watching Today live on my computer and get back to work. I hear my phone ping.

  Nick: That went well.

  Lucy: Yeah. She really sounded great.

  Nick: How are you?

  Lucy: Fantastic. You?

  Nick: Also quite fantastic. See you after your dinner?

  Lucy: Counting the minutes.

  Nick: Have a good day at work, you digital media goddess.

  Lucy: Thank you, you sports agent to the stars.

  I take a sip of coffee and enter my password into the content management system. A jolt of happiness runs through me every time I log into the system because it reminds me that careerwise I’m finally doing what I’ve wanted to do for years. I can say with absolute certainty that I love my job. It’s everything that I could have hoped for.

  My life has been so much better since I stopped working as Katherine’s assistant. It’s been, well, balanced. I still work hard, but normal New York City hard. My hours are predictable, and I have time to exercise now and then, see Nick and Ava and other friends, and do my laundry. And I have much less Sunday-night anxiety, so Sunday dinners at my mom’s are a regular thing.

  I put my headphones on, click on my Happy Lucy Work playlist, and dive in. I’m typing away, deep in my thoughts and work, when I realize there’s someone talking to me.

  “Hey, Lucy, can you hear me?

  I take off my headphones.

  “Sorry. Lost in thought. And Pharrell,” I say.