by Bry Ann
“Okay, I’m gonna call my dad. I’m a little scared.”
I feel my heart soften. “Don’t be scared. I promise my place is safe.”
“I know that rationally. I’m just a little paranoid right now.”
“I get it. I’ll let you go. See you soon. Love ya.”
“Ditto.”
She clicks off. I rush to call Charles before Sage gets a hold of him. I’m relieved when he picks up.
“Charles, this is Nix. Sage is about to call you to ask you to pick her up. Don’t let her know I called, but you have to pick her up yourself, okay? Don’t fight her on it. Also, shit, they… they cut her hair all crazy when they took her. She’s really, really broken about it, so please, for the love of God, don’t make her feel bad about it. Help uplift her. It looks cute.”
“Shit, that’s her.”
“Just be cool. She needs you to step up, Charles.”
I click off. Fuck, I hope he’s able to.
I watch from my car as Charles escorts Sage out the front door. Her hair is shorter, about mid-ear length, but evened out now. It’s shinier, like her mom put some shit in it to make it glow. It’s clear her mom made an effort to make Sage feel better about herself, which is good to see.
I watch from the window as Sage, very hesitantly, wraps her arms around her dad. Charles’s face flashes with emotion before he schools it and pats her on the back. When she pulls away, she’s smiling at him. I couldn’t be more relieved.
When she turns to me, she slides her teeth over her lower lip and does an awkwardly cute two finger wave. I do the wave right back at her.
That seems to loosen her up.
She tells Charles thank you, runs off to the car, and hurriedly opens the passenger door.
“Hi,” she squeaks, bouncing a little nervously in her seat.
I put my hand on her thigh. “Hi, brave girl. Missed you.”
She bites her lip harder. “Not so brave, probably.”
I tighten my grip on her leg.
“You’ll always be brave to me, Sage. No matter what.”
“Can we go to the grocery store? Is that… okay?”
“Yeah, you’re with me. Besides, Aaron won’t pull anything so soon. He wouldn’t risk it,” I mumble.
“Risk what?” she questions in a whisper.
“Me turning on him.”
“But…”
I turn to her. “Correct, princess. But he doesn’t yet realize I turned on him the second he set his sights on hurting you.”
She looks down at her lap and smiles. It’s small and barely noticeable, but she freaking smiles.
I punch her arm.
“You’re not supposed to smile at that!”
She giggles. “It’s not what it looks like.”
“Hmm… sure it’s not.”
“It’s not. I’m just… proud of you, that’s all. When I first met you, you desperately wanted to stand up to your father, but would never. Even saving me was terrifying to you at the time. But now, you’re fighting back. You’re so strong, Nix, and you’re not just taking his shit anymore. That makes me proud.”
She gives me a heart-stopping smile and goes back to fidgeting in her lap.
“Have I told you lately that I love you?”
“I know you love me.”
“Good, just reminding you.”
“I love you too. Very much. I think more than you’ll ever know.”
“Don’t deserve it.”
“I’m failing as a girlfriend if you still believe that.”
“I just know the truth, Sage. To you, I’m the guy who got you out of hell, but you so often forget how long it took me to do that.”
Her teeth grit, but she says nothing. That is, until we get to the grocery store parking lot. I throw the car into park mindlessly. I’m taking my hand off the gear shift when Sage leaps over the console into my lap. It’s not as hot as it sounds. She takes both her hands and shoves me back into the seat with a snarl.
“Nixon Marketta! You listen to me, you fucker, you need to stop thinking you aren’t good enough to be loved. You’re so special. It hurts me. Six years, dude. Six!”
Her hands tenderly cup my face.
“How do I get it through your head that I love you and am lucky to have the chance to love you?”
I grab her face and tenderly kiss her, while sliding my free hand to the door and slowly opening it.
“You make me feel that way sometimes, Sage. No one’s ever loved me before you.”
She pokes my nose and slides off me.
“And I’m pretty fantastic. I wouldn’t love you if you weren’t worth loving.” Her playful demeanor dies. “Nix, loving someone almost killed me. I wouldn’t give you that gift if you weren’t worth it.”
“Is this some sort of intervention season we’re going through as a couple?” I tease.
Sage snorts and climbs out of the car. “Yep. Five years is a long frickin’ time for us to struggle with the same shit, Nix.”
“Hey, you can—”
She spins around. “Let’s not fight,” she snaps. “I was more referring to you. You’ve grown so much. It’s just this last thing.”
“Yeah, the little detail that I’m an awful criminal who doesn’t deserve you. That miniscule last piece.”
I get out and slam the door.
“I love you, but this conversation is over.”
She huffs and jogs up beside me. I feel her eyes on me the entire time we walk.
“Hey, awful criminal?”
I smirk. “Yes, princess.”
“Tonight’s a good night. Remember?”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Then can you stop brooding and pick out what vegetable you want tonight? I have the rest covered.”
Chuckling slightly, I nod and head over to the Brussels sprouts. Mafia one minute, picking out veggies at the local shop the next. I swear my whole life is a mind fuck. I’m surprised I haven’t been committed to a psych ward yet.
I grab a bag of pre-chopped Brussels to make it easier for her to cook, and then I head back over. She's staring at two brands of tofu with intense focus.
“I can’t decide which one to get. They are both good brands. One has a bit of a meatier texture, but it’s not as accessible to most readers, and…”
“Sage?”
“Hm, yes?” She blinks up at me.
“You had me leave your side in a public place.”
She blinks again and then smiles a little. “I just… after last night… I wanted you to know I’m okay. I don’t want those men filling your head with nonsense. Lying to you. Nothing happened while they had me, other than chopping my hair off. Really.”
God, I love her so fucking much. I never tell her anything about the people I deal with, but she’s always so intuitive.
“I’m proud of you, Sage.”
I kiss her forehead and squeeze her hand. I don’t want to get into it here, but she needs to know that she’s pretty incredible.
The rest of the trip is uneventful. Sage takes food shopping very seriously, especially when it comes to blog recipes, so food shopping takes way longer than I would have liked, but it’s okay. I know my father wouldn’t pull anything on Sage again so fast. Especially with what I think is his new focus on my sister. I left the mansion early to make things right with Sage, but I talked to the boss first about keeping Rose safe until Sven got back.
He gave his word.
Now we’re back at the apartment. Sage is cooking and I’m pacing the house.
I need to meet with Aaron. I need to find out what he plans to do with Rose and try to talk him out of it. I have to somehow convince him I’m still his show pony, all while simultaneously planning how to destroy his empire.
Fuuuck.
That’s only a small piece of my to-do list.
“Okay, ready!” Sage calls, interrupting me from my thoughts.
I look over. There’s a large pan being kept warm on the stove, her recipe notep
ad to the left of that, and Pamela is sitting on the counter next to Sage, staring at the mess.
“Perfect, I’m hungry.”
Next thing I know, I feel her hands slide up my back. Shit, I must have zoned out. I thought she was still in the kitchen.
“Talk to me, Nix.”
Her hands slide to the spot over my heart. I feel her fingers tapping over the spot where it beats.
“Me being taken, that was more to hurt you than me.”
“I’m good if you’re good. I just have a lot going on.”
“What? Talk to me.”
“Nothing to concern yourself with, babe.”
“Let me ask you something, Nix.”
She takes a step away and studies me for a moment.
“Are you in this with me for the long haul? For better or worse and all that? I’m not asking for a proposal.” She makes a face. “But I want you to answer my question.”
My eyebrows furrow. “Of course. No matter what, I’ll always be here for you.”
She sighs. “That goes both ways. That’s a commitment on both of our parts. I admit I rely too much on you at times. You’re so strong” — she smiles a little and shrugs — “and I get scared, but I know you hurt so deeply, Nix. I see it. I’ve always seen it. How can we be a healthy couple if you bottle everything inside and don’t talk to me?”
She curls into my chest.
“Open up to me. I can take it. I want to take it. I want to share your demons with you, Nix. Please let me.”
I wrap my arms around her small body and tuck her further into my chest. I rub my hand over her hair several times, just letting the silence hang.
“You make me feel so safe, Nix. Please let me do the same for you.”
She steps up a bit so she’s literally flush against me.
“What about our night, princess?” I whisper.
“My perfect night is you being fully honest with me. I can’t think of a way I’d rather spend tonight.”
“You’re not fully honest with me either, babe.”
“I’ll talk to you. I’ll tell you about…” She sucks in a deep breath. “I’ll tell you about hell. About Rod. About everything,” she whispers.
I grab her shoulders and pull her away, searching her fearful green eyes. “Really? Why now?”
She takes a deep breath. “I can’t stand to see you hurt all alone anymore. Being taken made me realize the extent to which they go to hurt you. The extent they’ve probably gone your whole life.”
I pull away from her.
“I may cry. You’ll see me cry.”
“It’ll be nice to balance the score a little, ya know.”
I snicker. “Bitch.”
She throws her head back and laughs as she goes to the kitchen and brings dishes to the table.
“I made tofu and Brussels sprouts with a ginger-hemp dressing over brown rice. Does that sound okay?”
“It sounds wonderful. My body is in desperate need of some nutrient-rich food.”
“Perfect. This is super rich in vitamins and minerals.”
I take a seat on the couch and fiddle a bit with my dish. I don’t want to talk to Sage about this dark, twisted web I’m tangled in.
Her hand goes to my knee. I look up. She’s mid-chew, which makes her laugh and cover her mouth.
“Sorry,” she mumbles, giggling through a mouthful of food.
I smirk. “Tried to comfort me a bit too soon.”
She nods, laughing harder. Still laughing, she runs off to spit her food out in the sink so she can breathe. I chuckle as I watch her. When she gets back, her eyes are shining.
“What happened at your parents’ house? You’re completely different. It’s like nothing happened, Sage.”
“A lot,” Sage murmurs, smiling a little. “They accepted me, Nix. I didn’t look pretty. My hair was a ratty mess and they said with a little trim it looked awesome.”
Her watery eyes meet mine.
“Mom did hair with me and we laughed. Dad was so kind. I felt like I belonged. It turns out Jerald and Lucinda are a thing now, which makes me so happy. Lucinda’s an angel who life abandoned. That topic got me and Lucinda talking and she said some stuff that helped me get my head on straight. Really nothing happened with Rod other than my hair. Hair’s been dealt with, I have immense support, shock’s worn off, I’m okay.”
“I’m so happy to hear that, doll.”
Awkward silence.
Sage nibbles on her lower lip.
“Ca-can you start, please? I just… going straight into everything that happened is a little… um…”
“I get it. I’ll start. Uh, where should I start?”
She laughs a little.
“Start with what’s bothering you now and work your way backward?”
“Okay, that’s a little strange.”
Sage just shrugs as she stuffs a piece of tofu in her mouth.
“Fuck, Sage.”
“It’s okay. I can take it. Brave girl, remember?”
I shake my head at her. “If at any point it’s too much, promise you’ll tell me to stop. I have this all under control.”
Sure I do…
“If you can handle living it, then I can handle being your partner and being a safe place for you to vent.”
“Sage, promise,” I demand.
“Yeah, yeah, I promise, bossy.”
“This is serious, Sage.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
I nod. “It’s alright. I’m scared,” I mumble.
I don’t know what fuel I just added fire to, but Sage shoves her plate aside and practically leaps forward and grabs my hands, silently offering me her support.
“You know my sister, Rose?” I whisper.
“Yes, tell me about her.”
“She’s gorgeous, kind…” I smirk. “Kind of a coward.”
“Nix!” Sage slaps my arm.
“What? She is. Anyway, she also has a serious issue with food. I don’t know if it’s highly disordered eating or an actual eating disorder, but she’s extremely thin and barely eats anything.”
“I’m so sorry to hear that. Hunger is an awful feeling. I can’t imagine my own mind pressuring me into denying myself food.”
“It was actually very scary to witness. I kept fearing she was gonna pass out. She’d get dizzy, and when I demanded she eat, she’d fight me.”
Sage’s eyebrows tighten sympathetically.
“Luckily, Sven seemed to have a handle on it.”
“Who’s Sven? That’s a weird name.”
“He’s a weird guy,” I mutter and sigh. “This is where it gets complicated.”
“Okay, I’m ready.” She physically straightens her shoulders.
“He’s in the mafia.”
“Oh my… God.”
“Yep. That’s why you were taken. Well, one of the reasons. My sister, who Aaron never let me fucking meet before all this shit, and her friend, Lacey, who I’d love for you to meet one day, were on the run from them. Lacey was tied up with the boss, and Rose with the underboss, Sven. It was my job to keep them safe.”
“Holy shit.”
Sage’s eyes go wide, but she doesn’t look overwhelmed. More dumbfounded than anything else. Which… same.
“Yep. Also, I couldn’t tell her she was my sister at first. I eventually had no choice, but… for your safety, it was best I kept that quiet.”
“Oh, Nix, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s alright. I told her eventually. I just… I should be so happy to be in touch with her. I really should. But I’m so fucking jealous of her, Sage. I can’t get past it. I’m an asshole, I know, but her presence in my life has been a pain in my ass. She’s been this non-existent sister Aaron could use at any time to get me to do awful shit. I just want to walk away from her and say fuck it…”
Sage opens her mouth to speak, but now that the dam’s been opened, I just keep going.
“And then! Now Aaron is deciding to shift his focus to my sis
ter to use to get me in line, according to Rod, at least. That means I have to meet with him. I have to find out if that’s the truth and what he’s planning. I have to… I have to help her, because I love her, but I hate her. I don’t know! Ugh!”
I throw my head into my hands.
Thankfully, because Sage is a saint, she doesn’t say anything. She simply scoots close and rubs my back, once in a while murmuring soothing words and planting a kiss on my back and shoulders.
“Tell me more,” she murmurs. “Keep going.”
I laugh bitterly. “Isn’t that enough for you?”
Her hand strokes lightly down my chest.
“Sage,” I groan.
“Let it out. Come on. There’s something so broken inside you, Nix. Just like me. I’m gonna help…”
Ring! Ring! Ring!
I sigh and stare at Sage.
“Get it,” she murmurs, massaging my chest.
I growl and open my phone.
“Nix.”
“Nix, shit, something’s happened.”
My blood runs cold at the sound of Sven’s boss’s voice. The sound of men screaming rings in the background.
“What happened?”
“Nix, Rose was murdered less than an hour ago. There’s no body, so there’s no official confirmation, and I’m on that, but that’s what we’re being told.”
He sighs.
“My condolences.”
The world around me spins. I slam my hand down on Sage’s thigh for balance.
“No! Th-that wouldn’t… You said you’d protect her!”
“She ran off to get tampons with a driver Sven assigned. It’s slightly complicated, and I’ll loop you in when you’ve had a moment to process—”
“I have time now!”
“I have men here. It’s a mess. Lacey’s freaking out, demanding to know what’s going on. Sven’s on his way back. You don’t really know her. Let me deal with the people who did, fair?”
I hiss out a breath. “Please call me as soon as you can. I’ll… I’ll do what I can from my end,” I whisper.
“Thank you. I’ll be in touch soon.” He pauses. “For the record, I am sorry.”
Click. Dead line.
I look to Sage, whose eyes are big and watery with concern.
“I need you,” I whisper, before collapsing into her. Her arms go around me and I cry.
