Wine of the Gods 03: The Black Goats

by Pam Uphoff

  Rain didn't have much in the way of garments to shed, and the other five virgins stripped the busy General without his actually being much aware of it, even when he switched his attentions to Dust, and then Sunshine. Somewhere around the third time through the Holy Virgins, he realized that his injury didn't seem to be bothering him. On the fourth round he considered a coup to take over the country. By the fifth pass he was contemplating whether he needed to go to all that trouble, just to allow polygamy. He passed out half way through the sixth.

  The Second Anniversary of the Orgy was a blast. Very authentic, except for the goat, which sensibly ran off to find some lady goats.

  The General was rewarded with reinstatement, and married a rich widow who owned a vineyard.

  ***

  The Cove Islands were well south of the equator, about three hundred miles off the coast of Auralia. The northernmost island was a curve, three fourths of a circle enclosing an excellent harbor, the cove for which the entire chain of islands was named.

  Oscar was high on the main mast as they approached, and as the details came clear he found himself clinging desperately . . . This was the place. Up there, the shining white palace, the steep drop to the harbor, the streets zigzagging madly. Racing down them had been one more nightmare. The busy docks where a small boy could easily slip onboard a merchantman . . . Oscar turned his face away from the islands, looked out over the ocean.

  "I'm free now." He kept his voice to a whisper. "I'm free. I can go anywhere and everywhere. I was nine years old, no one will know me. I'm safe. I don't have to face anyone or do anything. They can't make me come back. I'm free." He took a long deep breath of the ocean air, and let ocean's long rolling peace seep back into his bones. Then he climbed down, prepared to face whatever he might see.

  He and Bran were both packed and ready to go, as was the colonel. He wasn't sure if the witches had ever unpacked. They were definitely looking the worse for wear, and were no doubt to blame for his dreams of making love to a Sea Hag who promised to make him the King of the Sea.

  The Sheep Man seemed to be a bit distracted as they entered the harbor, and sailed across to the town built into the sides of the steep hills rising all about them. He shook his head about something and then went below.

  They practically had to carry the witches to shore. Only Particular actually kissed the ground when they reached it—actually a street carved out of the solid rock of the island. But all the witches kicked off their shoes and stood still for a long moment.

  Oscar took the opportunity to look around. The area was bustling, the people in sight were a collection from around the World. Tawny Veronians, pale Westerners and dark Auralians. The locals seemed to be about half black haired and half fair, although suntanned enough to nearly match the Auralians. The exotic slanted eyes varied from very to barely. In general, the people looked quite a bit like Oscar, and he wondered . . . No. He was not going to wonder. He was going to focus on his job.

  Curious took a deep breath. "Well, now that feels better. I may—in another year or two, be able to contemplate the return voyage."

  The colonel cleared his throat, "I doubt you have that much time, however, perhaps now we should continue up to the Embassy?"

  The Western Embassy was small. It was considered a near retirement post for the ambassador and a small staff, and a plum for the young assistants and the clerks that kept records and dealt with the merchants who traded regularly with Western. They were in a flurry, trying to find space for their guests, and a bit taken aback when all the ladies opted for beds in the basement.

  The Sheep Man chuckled. "They need to be in touch with the Earth. Stick them up against that solid rock wall and they'll all be very pleased."

  They even emerged for dinner, all looking healthy and bright eyed. The clerks swooned over the three youngsters, and the Ambassador and his staff over the elders.

  "Horny old men," Oscar muttered in Bran's ear.

  "Yep, good to know we'll never lose it, right?"

  "Right." Oscar's plan to offer his arm to Mostly was stymied by the rush from the staff. He ruefully realized he wasn't going to be getting any of her time for as long as they were here.

  Dinner conversation ran around the diplomatic niceties of warning the government about the Goat wizards. The ambassador seemed to consider them all insane, for even believing such people existed.

  "Prince Negue," The old man refused to address the colonel by his military title, "This sort of talk may be acceptable in Karista, but despite the idyllic reputation, the Islands are a hard working practical sort of place. They cannot be fooled into thinking magic exists."

  The colonel put his elbows on the table and contemplated the ambassador. "Why don't they believe in magic? I thought the Sea King was supposed to be some sort of magic user, himself?"

  The ambassador snorted. "The ancient Sea Kings are a myth, nothing more. The Islanders tended to idolize the old king, and pretend he and his child bride were the last true Sea Kings, but it's all nonsense, along with 'the Lost Prince'. The Sea King's nephew was killed by the same pirates that tried to capture Cove City, and killed the old king. Don't bring it up." he glared fiercely at his own King's eldest son.

  Oscar kept his eyes on the table, his finger white from the pressure of his grip on the edge. Pirates? What pirates? Uncle must have pulled some men out of the jails and accused them, posthumously, no doubt . . . He forced his grip to ease. Forced himself to listen to the conversation.

  The Sheep Man raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. "Tell us about the other islands. From the tales I'd heard I expected smoke and lava everywhere."

  "Oh, there've been no eruptions here for several centuries. All the active volcanoes are on the other islands."

  "Do they erupt often?" Oscar asked the assistant sitting next to him. A safe subject! Hooray!

  "Oh, there's always one or another erupting." The assistant said cheerfully. "We hear about this village or that moving everything, and then moving right back after the lava's cooled."

  "You're kidding."

  "No, really, the lava flows are relatively slow, plenty of time to move everything but the houses, and once a flow is cooled, well, if it hasn't destroyed all the crops, then why not go back? You hear about people getting killed every once in a while." He waved a casual hand.

  "Have you got any maps?" Lefty asked from the other side. "I want to see one, and I'm sure the others will too."

  "Oh, you don't need a map, just hire a local fisherman to take you, they know the islands and the currents."

  None-the-less, with a bit of persuasion, Geri did produce a map showing all the islands and the volcanoes marked along with the villages. They had a number of maps rolled up and close to hand in a swank library.

  "This is a bit out of date," Geri said, tapping a point on the map. "Down here, for instance, this big volcano hasn't erupted in years, but the water just off shore is steaming and the locals say a new volcano is building up under the water."

  "So, the northern third of the Islands don't have volcanoes?"

  "Active ones. You're standing on the rim of one, you know?"

  Oscar envisioned the circular island. He'd seen maps like these before . . . "It's way too large to be a volcano. Probably a circle of volcanoes."

  "Nope." Geri pulled out another map. "Soundings of the harbor. See here, in the center, another volcano was building up underwater before it stopped, but look at the depths. It's just like crater lake in Hester Province, that old extinct volcano."

  "Just a lot bigger," the Sheep Man spoke from the door. They hadn't even heard him coming. The rest of the group was close behind, and they poured over every map the Embassy had.

  "Colonel? Can you send these youngsters to scout out the volcanoes?" The Sheep Man asked. "We're going to be stuck talking to diplomats for days, I suspect."

  "Certainly, umm." The colonel looked at Curious.

  "We're not setting foot on a boat for at least a week. Even for a short trip." A
ll the witches nodded agreement.

  "All right, you two are on your own. I'll fund hiring a local and a boat. Start by getting copies of these maps, as up to date as possible, report in before you leave."

  "Yes, sir!" They both spoke with identical enthusiasm. He eyed them and they put on sober expressions.

  "I expect you back reasonably soon and with good, up-to-date notes on which volcanoes are erupting, and what the land and people are like. Trying to get a bunch of government officials to accept that a magical invasion might be on the way is not going to be fun, so you keep my foul mood in mind and don't have too much fun."

  "When the wizards arrive, they'll learn all about magic." Curious said. "If they won't listen before hand, they will also learn about invasions from a bad perspective."

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Summer 1356

  Cove Islands

  Enquiries took Oscar and Bran to the Harbormaster's office, and then through winding, climbing streets to a little hole in the wall where a man called Ecker produced beautiful maps. The back wall of his little empire was covered with a single map, patched with updated information, scribbled on tentative corrections, and written notes about seasonal shifts and ongoing changes.

  "Volcanoes? Well, I've got all of them, but some, I haven't got reliable information about for several years. Probably because there's not much that has changed . . . There are twenty-eight active volcanoes, including the one that isn't above water yet."

  They bought a map of all the islands from him "All updated to about a month ago." he pointed at hand drawn lines. "I only make new plates every other year, too expensive to do more often, especially since it all could change next week."

  He also directed them to the home of a recently retired fisherman, "Can't handle the heavy work with the nets any longer, but he hasn't sold his boat yet and he's as knowledgeable about the seas as any man you could find."

  Insk Sanjack proved to be a small gnarled old man who, once they showed him their money, was please to sail them anywhere at all.

  They talked it over, and finally decided to start at the southern-most island and work north. The southern islands were mostly uninhabited, and they quickly made notes about the eruptive stages of each of the twenty 'young islands' as Insk called them.

  The other eight volcanoes were on three large islands, with multiple villages on each island. They put into the harbor at Gendo village on Gendo Island in the late afternoon of the tenth day since they'd sailed from Cove City. Insk took them to a horrible tavern, run down and infested with old whores. Among other things.

  "Wish I could take advantage of the opportunity," Insk sighed. "But old age . . . " They were the only men there except the bartender. And he was questionable.

  Oscar and Bran looked at each other. The Sheep Man had given them a tiny bottle and told them to not get into trouble . . . but Insk had been such good company, and showed them every volcano, even let them take soundings.

  Oscar bought a bottle of red wine that smelled like something Harry would use to clean his floor, and Bran added a quarter of the Sheep Man's bottle. The sunlight flashed off it as he swirled it a bit.

  "Here you go, Insk. The medicine will be a bit dilute, but it should put you in top form." Bran poured him a glass. "We're going to go take a look around town, see you back here."

  After they were a few steps down the street, Oscar said, "I really don't want to sleep there. I think I got fleas just walking in the door. Old gods know what I'd catch if I touched a mattress in there."

  "No kidding." Bran shuddered, "But if that was dinner I was smelling, it does have one thing to return for."

  Unfortunately, the village hadn't much else to offer, and after much too short a length of time, they found themselves back at the Sea God's Garden.

  "Hey, at least it sounds happy." Bran said.

  "Right. So what if there's not a woman under fifty years of age in there." Oscar squared his shoulders and led the way inside.

  They found a one-man party in full swing.

  "Hey boys, that wine's a real hit!" Insk yelled as he waded through the crowd of aged whores, waving the bottle. "More glasses, Mev! The boys is gentry!"

  Oscar tried to defer, but large tumblers of wine were shoved into their hands.

  "We'll probably need this to survive the night," Bran muttered.

  Oscar took a sip. "Damn. It tastes good."

  Bran took a gulp and looked at the rattled old women who had oozed up on either side of him, "Sip ladies?" he sounded nervous.

  Oscar found himself equally surrounded and offered up drinks. If I'm going to bed with them, they need to be healthy. All three, err, four of them.

  Insk was pulled away by some others, and Oscar saw him pouring a bit of his wine into another bottle, nearly full. The lantern light gleamed off it. "Tell me that doesn't work, it's got to be much too dilute by now. Otherwise we are in so much trouble."

  The women giggled in his ears. "Come, on, we'll show you how much trouble you are in."

  He finished the glass. He was going to need it.

  The next morning he managed to crawl out from among a heap of snoring women, poke Bran to wake him, leave Insk sleeping, and stagger downstairs. One old woman was awake and cooking. She beamed at them and handed them bowls of porridge. Oscar thought back to all the women last night . . . surely he and this old hag hadn't . . . err, yes. He had. The old gal was incredibly flexible for . . . anyone of any age.

  He caught Bran's eye. "It didn't happen."

  Bran nodded firmly. "And there were no goats."

  "We need to hike inland and take a look at the volcanoes."

  Bran nodded in relief, "Yes, might take a couple of days."

  The old woman beamed at them. "No problem, but what do you need to know about the volcanoes?"

  She turned out to be a repository of gossip and news from the entire island. Oscar wrote it all down, well, mostly just the geology part, and in the end they dragged Insk away and sailed around the island doing a quick check of the accuracy of the news, and then away to the next island to the north.

  "Ah, love 'em and leave 'em types, are you?" Insk laughed. "Ah, what a night! Now I can retire happy, knowing I had one last fling!" He patted a bottle tucked into his seabag. "Or maybe more."

  "Ah, Insk, that stuff, umm, maybe you should save it up, find a woman you'd like to marry . . . "

  "Marry! Never again! Women are a curse to men!" He tugged his hat down hard on his head, "Except fer, you know."

  "Yep, we know." Bran grinned, "So is there a tavern like that on this next Island?"

  "Indeed there is, lad, and this one is called the Net Full of Grief."

  The Net had a few other patrons, and not quite as many over-the-hill prostitutes. The end results were just the same, though.

  Right down to the gossip about the local villages, volcanoes and eruptions.

  After a night at The Boiling Pot on the third Island they headed back to Cove.

  "Thank the old gods." Oscar collapsed on the foredeck. "I don't think I could survive a fourth night in a row like that."

  "Now, lads, surely you're going to let me show you around the harbor areas of Cove City! Some of the finest whorehouses in the world! Or at least that's what some travelers say. I've never been away from the Islands my whole life."

  "We have to report to the colonel." Bran whimpered. "We'll hunt you up in a few days, if you live that long."

  They spent one night anchored by a rock in the sea, and then sailed on to Cove the next day, arriving at dusk.

  "Now, you boys just ask for the Sea King's Harem anywhere down here, and you'll find me there." Insk took his pay and headed for his version of paradise.

  Oscar hitched his pack onto his back and headed uphill. Bran staggering after.

  The embassy was practically smothered in gloom.

  The colonel grabbed them and pulled them down to the basement. The visitors had pretty well taken it over the level.

  "We
got thrown out of court." The Sheep Man said. "Bloody idiots. Of course if I'm wrong about their coming here the King isn't going to thank me for messing with his relationships with a sovereign nation. They don't believe in magic. Got a few superstitions about the Sea Hag and dolphins."

  "I couldn't get the court to even admit that there'd ever been such a thing as a Sea King with actual magic. They were completely disbelieving in invading wizards. 'We have occasional pirate gangs claiming an island, we can deal with them.' They wouldn't listen." The colonel spread out their maps and looked over their notes. "You even have rough censuses?"

  Lefty unrolled a bunch of maps and started transferring notes.

  Oscar cleared his throat. "Gossip mainly, although I did a rough estimate of several to check. If the Wizards are looking for an inhabited island with an active volcano, it'll be one of these three. If they don't care about crops and food, then there's twenty, well, nineteen above water, other volcanoes, mostly just the cones sticking out of the water. There's a few goats grazed on some of them, no real farming."

  "It'll be one of the three." the Sheep Man tapped the inhabited islands. "They have an army of about seven hundred to feed. If you had to pick one, yourself, which island would you pick and why?"

  "Gendo," Oscar had no doubts. "Of the eight live volcanoes on inhabited islands, four are on Gendo, plus it has a large inland area that is farmed. One of the volcanoes is currently erupting. The other two islands have two volcanoes apiece, one small eruption a year ago, nothing now."

  "The only thing against Gendo is lack of a really good harbor," Bran said, "But defensively, that's not really a negative."

  "And the village of Gendo . . . umm, this one over here is actually larger?"

  "Yes, and it has farms up over this ridge." Oscar crossed his fingers for luck. Please, we don't want to spend a lot of time, say, nine months, in Gendo. "Or so I heard, we didn't actually stop in, just sailed down the coast and checked out this volcano."

  "That's the one that is erupting?"

  "Yes. It blew out the seaward side of the peak two years ago, and has been pouring lava into the ocean ever since. Very steamy."