Juice

by Nako

  “Did you not read the message I sent you last night?”

  He turned to face her, leaning his body against the island in the middle of the kitchen.

  “Did it say read?”

  She had a bad habit of asking him questions that she already knew the answer too.

  “Do you think this shit is a game? I’m not playing with you and on a scale of 1-10, I’m at a-”

  “A what?” he challenged.

  The arguing was getting on his nerves. That’s all they ever did these days.

  “A FUCKING 10!” she roared, her chest was now heaving up and down as her eyes began to well with tears.

  This game that they were playing was no longer entertaining. Like a carousel in the middle of the park, they went around and round. She was more than ready to get off this ride.

  “What you wanna do, Tia?” he couldn’t do this with her today. Other shit was on his mind.

  The nonchalant behavior is what bothered her the most. As if her feelings didn’t matter to him.

  “You’ve changed, and you don’t even see it.” She shook her head in pure disbelief.

  “Who works this hard to stay the same?” he scoffed.

  She didn’t need to hear another word.

  “I’m done.” She shook her head, feeling superior. More confident than she had in months.

  “Done with what, Tia?” he said her name as if it was the last thing he wanted to fall from his brown, full lips. Like, she got on his nerves. As if, he was the one fed up. The irony.

  “You. This. Us. I’m done, Jamari.”

  The fact that she used his government name twice in less than a few minutes told him that she wasn’t bluffing.

  “Why?” he questioned. Because what was really the problem here? She had everything a woman wanted. Juice took damn good care of her.

  “If you even have to ask me, then I really am done with you. I sent you a text last night…”

  He interrupted her, “Do you know how many fuckin text messages I get?”

  Tia gave him a look that told him that she didn’t care if the phone had a billion got damn messages, that had nothing to do with her. She was to come first. Period. Now that she finally realized that she was no longer a priority, she was through with the chapter that included him in her life.

  “If you can give me ‘til the end of the day to find someone to help me move my things, I’ll appreciate it,” she changed the subject and prepared herself to wrap this up, mentally and figuratively.

  They’d been together for a while now, like a long ass time. So long that a ring should have been on her finger, her last name changed and a crib in the spare room that they used as storage. However, none of those things had taken place. Tia had been patient. Downright on hold while he chased his dreams, established his name in the industry, and built his career.

  She’d been patient while he traveled the world on tours with his artist, the superstar Mahogany. He only invited her twice and still, she never complained.

  She’d been patient while he dipped in and out, not knowing that she knew him better than herself. All because she was taught that ‘loyalty’ came with test but fuck the test. She wanted more. Deserved better. Today, she grabbed hold on to her dignity.

  “Are you serious right now?”

  This couldn’t be happening. Tia had his heart, she was home. Fuck was she on right now?

  “You’re that mad at me?” he had to ask her.

  She blinked back tears. “No, I’m not. Have a nice life, I wish you well,” she said before turning on her bare feet and walking down the hallway of their home so that she could start to pack her things.

  The final straw had been pulled last night and she was now empty with not another ounce or dollop to give to him.

  “Tia, do you know how long we’ve been together?” he questioned as he followed her.

  “Ask yourself that,” she mumbled under her breath. It wasn’t time for a history lesson. Her mind was made up.

  “You just gon’ leave me?” He was in complete shock right now.

  “You left us a long time ago, stop playing with me,” she turned around and quickly gave him the harsh reality of where they were right now.

  Tia pointed her finger at him, yelling, “YOU BROUGHT US TO THIS PLACE.”

  Juice knew what she was speaking of, but they had talked about this shit. She promised to not throw it in his face anymore and he swore that he’d do better.

  “Tia, what are you really telling me? Yo, you gon’ leave me cus I missed one event?”

  His girlfriend was a flower, planting her seeds and blooming all over the place. Not only was she about to start law school, but she also had a passion for photography and wanted him to come to every freakin’ showcase or gallery. Juice was one person, he couldn’t be everywhere.

  She shook her head, he didn’t get it. He never would. He didn’t even fucking try. She was tired. Weak. Drained. Overwhelmed and her soul was quenching for a good thing. The man standing before her was no longer a promised love.

  It was a waste.

  “You don’t get it, my love. If you can let me pack my things, I’ll leave the key on the counter,” she wanted to bow out gracefully. No fighting, overusing profane words, or saying things that they would most likely say out of anger. Tears formed in the corners of his lids and he let them fall because he could do that in front of her.

  “How did we get here?” he asked himself more so than of her.

  She heard him though. “We’ve been here baby.”

  He was her…wasted love.

  η

  Tia was a good girl, you know the girl that your mother loved, the one that your friends called “sis”. She was the chick that everyone constantly questioned when you would marry her. She was the girl that prayed for you, washed your clothes, cooked three meals if her schedule allowed it and even when it didn’t she still made sure you were fed. She was the girl that sucked your dick all night and went to sleep right after because she knew you were tired but still wanted you to receive that release that she felt you rightfully deserved. Tia was the woman that had it if you didn’t have it, the chick that told you everything was love and that y’all were forever in this together.

  She was your person.

  Your best friend. Advisor, Counselor, Manager, Stylist, and most importantly, your cheerleader. On good and bad days, Tia was there.

  He took her for granted. Took her presence, her essence and what she brought to his life, all for granted. He didn’t think she would ever leave. Off and on for almost eight years, more on than off. More good days than bad days.

  More laughs than frowns. She cried out in pleasure more than she did out of pain due to heartbreak.

  He was a good guy. Juice loved her, she knew that…never questioned it not one bit.

  However, love wasn’t enough. She needed him, the man…the person. He was hidden somewhere behind shows and meetings.

  The guy that she gave her all to and needed to give it back to her in the same, he failed. Her expectations were high, and he continuously aimed low.

  What was ironic was that she’d been praying, faithfully.

  Praying for a sign, hoping that things would either get better or worse.

  It had reached a point where she would have felt as if she had no other choice but to leave him, for once and for all. Which is why Juice felt like her reasoning was poor, but to Tia it was the last straw.

  And the last straw wasn’t weighed, it was simply the last fuck up that she would deal with.

  Out of the door and out of his life.

  New number.

  New location…not too far from her new school, but far enough where she should never run into Juice. They didn’t hang in the same circles anyway, her nigga, ex-nigga, was famous. She wasn’t. On the most, she was known as the light-skin girlfriend of Juice, P’s protégé. What a title.

  Digital detoxing and soul yearning for some peace, Tia moved.

  She dyed her hai
r blonde and began to do the work. The work consisted of repairing her broken heart. Refreshing her goals and rejuvenating her spirit from the inside out, she was going to get it together and constantly told herself that she would be alright.

  Thankfully, her career was in a place where she could either sink or soar and baby girl had nothing to lose, so she gave it her all. She was climbing the rank as fast as she could, staying late and showing up early. Overextending herself to be around the best so that she could become one of the greats. One thing she learned from her former lover was that sometimes you had to do what everyone else didn’t want to do. That was how Juice could go from intern to managing one of the world’s biggest artists and Tia had been by his side since the very fucking beginning. She was there when he shared a pad with four other niggas and they had to have sex on the floor, so the bed wouldn’t creak against the wall. When they were splitting the tab because he couldn’t afford to take her to dinner. That’s how long she’d been around.

  The fame didn’t get to Juice’s head, but the bitches surely did. She’d been around for that too. Tia remained loyal, stayed patient with him, forgave him when he knew he was in the wrong in the first fucking place. Pussy didn’t just fall in your lap, but according to Juice for him, it did. He swore that temptation was a motherfucker and she told him that, but so was her trying her hardest not to chop off his balls. She’d done the fighting, crying and blocking his number for days at a time.

  Tia was a bad bitch in the making. As soon as she finished law school, she’d have her shit together too.

  One thing she knew for sure was that Juice had better pay her tuition, broke up or not, he was the one that pushed her to apply. He figured that it would keep her busy while he traveled the world with Mahogany.

  She applied and was accepted, so now he needed to continue to foot the bill. She would figure out how to pay her high ass rent once the money she saved ran out at a later date. In her doe-shaped eyes, he owed her that.

  For the pain, shame, embarrassment and misery.

  A notification arrived at her phone letting her know that it was paid in full for the remainder of the year. It killed her to text him the reminder to pay.

  He didn’t respond, but clearly had gotten the message. Lord knows, she was thankful.

  She sent a text message, “I appreciate it, Jamari,” and then blocked his number. Not caring if he read it or not. He knew what it was. Today was the first day of her second life and she felt damn good.

  She was about to unapologetically pour into herself. The same amount of love and energy she’d given him for years would now go into the woman that she was trying to become.

  Tia was done with niggas and their baggage. She was done with relationships and pointless friendships too. It was time for her to be selfish.

  Moving was one of the best things she could’ve ever done.

  They say that the one who loved the hardest takes the longest to move on and that was true. Sooooo fucking true.

  η

  Mahogany asked Juice an hour later for the third time, “Are you sure you’re okay?” Something was off about him and because she was quite familiar with his persona and moods, she could detect it easily.

  “Yes. You need to redo that verse, it sounds horrible.”

  Mad or not, business still had to be taken care of and Shorty wasn’t sounding her best. She flicked him off as she headed back into the booth. Juice took a deep breath and found himself checking his phone for the umpteenth time. Today was her first day of law school and he assumed that she would still hit his line to let him know how things went. Did she like her teacher? Was the class full?

  He had helped her pick out her classes and they coordinated their schedules to still be able to work and spend time together. He wondered if she wore the all black or the pink dress with the nude Tory Burch flats. On the low, he was her stylist. Tia loved his opinion when it came to looking her best.

  No text messages. Not even a phone call. All he had to go off was the selfie she posted on Facebook. She had deactivated her Twitter and Instagram but kept Facebook because that’s how her “family” kept up with her.

  “First day of law school, wish me luck!”

  Her smile was bright and contagious. Juice lit up just looking at those pretty ass teeth. She seemed happy. Without him? He didn’t know. Wasn’t too sure.

  He was going through it right now. He missed her like crazy.

  Mahogany called his name twice and he didn’t hear a word. His mind was on his baby and he wanted her back but knowing that the damage had fucked her up. Tia was a lot of things, but bold wasn’t one of them. She was soft and sweet, which is how he knew that she was taking the breakup serious. They hardly took breaks. The most the couple could stomach was going the day without communicating and even then, they both were usually miserable, but he would never tell her how he felt. Juice didn’t know what he had until it was gone. His career was usually the distraction that he welcomed but not this time around.

  “Do we need to reschedule?”

  As a manager that stuck to a very strict schedule, he snapped the hell out of it. Hearing the words re and schedule in one sentence with one of the world’s biggest artist, if not the biggest, was a major no-no.

  “Uh no. What does me having relationship problems have to do with you recording? You see all these people in here? They’re experienced in this…I’m your manager,” he reminded her before standing up and stepping out of the

  studio to call Tia. He was in his fucking feelings and had some shit to get off his chest.

  Juice called her phone and it went straight to voicemail. Surely, he had to be tripping so he dialed her right back.

  Voicemail again.

  Tia blocked him.

  “The fuck?” he mumbled under his breath, in pure disbelief.

  At the exact same time his phone rang. It was an unsaved number, but he knew exactly who it was.

  Baby mama number 2 and both of those bitches drove him crazy.

  “Yeah, I’m busy. Wassup?” She couldn’t or shouldn’t be calling about money because the fifteen-thousand dollars that she received monthly was automatically drafted out of his account. Who needed that much money for a one year old? He’ll never understand.

  “Hey Juice, how are you?”

  She was a nice girl, a lil' scandalous in his opinion but nice. However, he hated her and there was nothing she could do to change how he felt.

  “Busy. What do you want?” he never understood why she never texted him.

  “Not much, did you think about what we talked about last week?”

  How did she expect him to remember anything other than what was happening right now? He was busy as hell. Not only was he managing Mahogany, but he had shit going on. A lot of it.

  “No, tell me again…” his memory needed to be refreshed.

  “I wanted you to go to the circus with me and Jayla.” She was crossing her fingers. Her daughter deserved her father and so far, she’d only seen him twice. Once when she was born when he came to the hospital after the hard part was over. He took one peek at her and pressed for a DNA test, although a blind man could see that the child was his. The second time was her birthday in which he was an hour late to, brought gifts, took a few pictures, and introduced the little girl to his mother who didn’t care how the kids were conceived, she was happy to be a grandmother. That was months ago. He didn’t answer her FaceTime calls and had her blocked on all his social media handles. The fifteen-thousand was his parental duties. He didn’t plan on contributing anything else. In his eyes, those kids ruined his fucking relationship. Tia hadn’t been the same since.

  “Uhhhh… When is it?”

  For some reason, he heard his mother’s voice in his head telling him to do better.

  His baby mother exhaled deeply, she’d been holding her breath praying for a slow yes versus a fast hell the fuck no and stop calling me. He was good for saying that to her.

  “Tomorrow at seven.”
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  He didn’t have anything to do. Mahogany would be in the studio.

  “Yeah, you want me to meet y’all there?”

  “If that works better for you.”

  “I’ll come scoop y’all.”

  She wanted to back flip over the couch, but she kept it cool. She didn’t care for him as a person, but he had to do better when it came to her daughter. Period.

  “Okay, I will text you in the morning to remind you.”

  “Kia, I’ll be there at 6:30, no reminder needed,” he said dismissively. If he could remember a million meetings, he could remember to take his kid to the circus.

  “My name is Crystal.”

  Shit was embarrassing…he couldn’t do nothing but hang up.

  When he returned to studio A, Porter, his big homie, brother, but most importantly, his mentor was bending over the sound board. Every now and then, P would stop by the studio and check up on shit. He stepped aside to allow his wife to flourish, but the music exec in him couldn’t stay too far away.

  “Oh yeah, she sounds way better,” Juice had a good ear for melodies and could spot a number one hit a mile away. No one could tell him that Mahogany wasn’t the best.

  It was an honor to work alongside with her. He didn’t take the opportunity for granted.

  “What’s up lil' bro? My baby doesn’t sound that much better. She needs to come home and let me take care of her.” Porter faced him and dapped him up.

  “She really does.”

  Mahogany rolled her eyes and said into the microphone, “Y’all do know that I can hear y’all, right?”

  “Take a five-minute break. Rest your vocals... Get her some tea,” Juice told her assistant.

  Mahogany came out of the booth and went right into her husband’s arms.

  “What you doing here?”

  “Had a meeting with Yara and stopped in to check on you. You’re burning up. Do you think it’s the flu?” He looked at Juice, as if he was a doctor.

  He shrugged his shoulders. “Not sure, but I was thinking about cutting out the meet and greets for a lil’ bit. She’s picking up the germs of other people.”

  For the most part, Mahogany was a young, vibrant and healthy woman. She stayed in the gym. They had a chef that traveled with them on the road to cut back on eating out and over-indulging on fast food.