One Giant Leap

by Heather Kaczynski

  Emilio turned to me. “Cass, are you okay? You look pale. Do you need to lie down?”

  I couldn’t absorb it all. The fact that my face was being broadcast across the state—maybe across the country—it wouldn’t compute. Would my parents see? What would they think?

  “No, I’m fine.” I was still disturbed by my mini flashback, and didn’t know how I could sleep right now. “Hanna—are you sure you want to come?”

  She looked at me for a long moment with an expression I couldn’t read. “I can’t exactly go back now. Crane is going to know what I did. And I don’t want to be around him when he does.” She grimaced.

  Something struck my heart like a splinter. “So, you . . . what? You just gave up your job?” For me? I added silently. I couldn’t believe she would just throw it away. Hanna, who’d always been out for herself.

  She gave a barely discernable shrug.

  “You can’t do that,” I protested.

  “It’s done,” she said simply. “Yeah, it was a good job. But if we do things Crane’s way, I don’t know if there’d even be a job to go back to. He’s . . . lost sight of things. All he cares about now, his sole mission, is to harness whatever power the vrag have dangled in front of him. He’s obsessed with it.”

  I sighed, rubbing at the bridge of my nose. “I’d hoped maybe we could get him on board. I don’t know how I’m going to convince the world otherwise.”

  “He’ll never listen to the truth. The vrag have basically bribed people into thinking they’re our fairy godmother. He wouldn’t accept the alternative.”

  I had to hope that somebody would.

  Mitsuko returned surprisingly fast, laden with plastic shopping bags.

  Despite what I’d told Emilio, I did end up dozing on the couch. It had grown dark outside. I stretched and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand to make sure I hadn’t been drooling before I joined the others.

  There were at least a dozen full bags littering the table. What could she have possibly bought? At most I needed food, clothes, a phone, and transportation.

  “This is too much,” I said, confused.

  Everyone stared at me blankly. Mitsuko spoke first. “We’re coming with you. Obviously.”

  I hadn’t been that far gone, had I? Was my memory still recovering? “I don’t recall that being part of the plan. It’s too dangerous for you guys.”

  “All of us are in danger now, Cass. We’re collaborators. SEE is working with the government. They have free rein to do whatever they want and they wanted to lock you up, so who knows what they’ll do to get you back. We want to come with you. Help you.”

  Was this really happening? Were we really about to go into hiding together? Become fugitives, like we’d committed some crime? This was crazy. Running from our own people—we should be working together. “NASA could help us,” I countered.

  “NASA doesn’t have enough power now. And who knows who might turn you in, thinking they were doing the right thing?”

  “Unless it was just one person. Somebody we trusted. My dad, or . . .”

  “Pierce,” Hanna and Emilio said together.

  Colonel Pierce, retired NASA astronaut and first man on Mars, had been in charge of us during selection. When things had gone wrong during a simulation, Pierce had personally saved our lives.

  Mitsuko took that into consideration. “Yeah, maybe he’d help us. But how?”

  She had me there.

  “They can’t touch us. We’re still American citizens with rights. Michael’s a cop, or close enough,” Emilio argued. “That should count, right?”

  “FBI,” Michael corrected him, but no one paid any attention.

  “Michael might be fine or he might not be. But he can take care of himself. These are desperate times, Cass. And we can be useful.” As if to demonstrate, Mitsuko gestured to the wealth of goods spilling from plastic Target bags.

  Three prepaid burner phones with five hundred minutes each. A wad of hundred-dollar bills. Various road-trip-appropriate junk food items. Portable phone chargers. A small pantry’s worth of shelf-stable food: trail mix, canned fruit, beans, energy bars, water bottles, Gatorade, instant coffee. Multiple sets of new clothes, a pair of tennis shoes, a huge set of toiletries, paper plates, toilet paper, laundry detergent, trash bags, a first-aid kit, batteries, walkie-talkies—on and on. Suko had bought us everything we might need to set up a household and stay there awhile.

  “It was the max amount I could take out of the ATM,” Mitsuko was saying. “But we can go again in the morning when we leave.”

  “It’s too much.” I put my hands on the back of my neck, suddenly realizing how sore my muscles were. “I can’t take your money.”

  “You can and you will,” Mitsuko said. “Because it’s a loan, not a gift. And besides, it’s a small price to pay to save the world.”

  The conversation went on without me, moving at the speed of light while I remained standing still. In a blur, I realized they were all making plans to come with me to the safe house, to rent a car, and were hammering out details.

  And I didn’t stop them. It felt so nice to have this burden lessened, if only a little. To have others help me shoulder it. To accept help. I didn’t always have to do it alone, did I? They were right. Saving the world was a lot to handle by yourself.

  I closed my eyes and felt myself waver slightly on my feet. I wasn’t in any condition to outrun anybody right now.

  My family, I thought again. What would happen to them? I should call them. But I said nothing. I felt like as long as they weren’t spoken of, they were protected, far away in our brick two-story in our cookie-cutter suburb. Nothing to do with this.

  “What about Cristiana?” Mitsuko asked.

  At the mention of that name, Emilio went quiet. The stop in the conversation shook me awake. “Wait, who are we talking about?”

  “His girlfriend,” Mitsuko explained. “Who lives with him and will probably notice he’s gone.”

  He grasped the top edge of the chair and frowned at it. “I don’t want her involved,” he said.

  “So you’re just going to leave her here without any explanation?” Mitsuko clearly didn’t like that plan.

  “I’ll think of something,” he said tightly. “But I can’t ask her to—to go on the run. I don’t know how to explain . . . all this.”

  “You have until tomorrow morning to figure it out,” Mitsuko said.

  “Why can’t we leave now?” Night felt like a long eight hours to wait when we already had an eight-hour drive before I could make sure Luka was safe. Before we were safe.

  “Oh, hon. You’re exhausted. We’ll all get some sleep and we can start fresh in the morning, okay?” There was a moment of quiet where I opened my eyes and Mitsuko squinted at me. “You need to sleep. Come on. I’ll take care of you, Cass. Since, unlike some people, we have an actual guest room, and not a video game room, because we are actual, certified grown-ups.” She gave Emilio a mock dirty look as we passed. He may have stuck his tongue out at her. Or maybe it was a finger. I didn’t really look.

  I was dead on my feet. All I could do was follow Suko obediently, which, I noticed, was what Michael did, too.

  Mitsuko said good-bye to Emilio, Michael shook his hand, and then I hugged him good-bye. It was short but tight, heartfelt. “I’m really glad you’re back,” he said.

  “Me too.” He laughed as I pulled away, but I wasn’t joking. “You’re a lifesaver. You too, Suko. I didn’t expect to just literally drop back into your lives and have you be one hundred percent in my corner right away. You don’t know how much I needed this. I’m really grateful.”

  Emilio and Mitsuko wore twin smiles. “You dope,” Suko said affectionately. “Of course we’re in.”

  “Totally,” Emilio agreed.

  Michael said, “You don’t get it, Cass. These two have been insanely jealous. They’re just trying to live vicariously through you. You should’ve heard all the whining I’ve had to endure the past few months.
‘Wonder where Cass is right now?’ ‘Wonder what Cass is doing right now?’ ‘Man, can you believe how lucky Cass is?’” He mimicked Emilio’s and Mitsuko’s inflections so accurately we all laughed.

  “It wasn’t all fun and amazing,” I said quietly. “I’m afraid I brought death and destruction back with me.”

  “Oh, Cass.” Mitsuko pulled me to her side, pressed my head into the crook of her neck.

  After Emilio left for the night, Michael disappeared into a back bedroom and Hanna stayed on the living room couch as Mitsuko took my hand. “Come on. We only have a few hours till daybreak, and you’re going to need them all.”

  “Suko,” I said, following her down the hall. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

  “I’m trying to build up my good karma. Oh, and you know me. I like being the center of attention. I’m just gonna try to stand close to you so I get to be near the action. It’s selfish, really.”

  I huffed a laugh, thinking that was the end of the conversation. She opened a door to the left and I caught a glimpse of a queen bed with a plush navy comforter.

  “I know you’re exhausted, Cass. But listen. If you’re right about all this, some major shit is about to go down, and nobody knows but us. We have a duty. We need to fight back. The regular people who are just going about their lives, minding their business, hoping someone else fixes this mess so they can go back to worrying about the dumb shit we all worry about? Nobody else is going to fight for them. So let us help you, Cass. This is too big a thing to do alone.”

  I couldn’t muster the energy for the appropriate response. Just, “You’re right. Thank you.”

  Her voice must have carried in the silence, because Michael returned, unexpectedly half-dressed, his shirt unbuttoned. I startled out of my fatigue and averted my eyes, blushing hard, but he marched right past me as though I weren’t there. He walked straight to Mitsuko, grabbing her face in both his palms, and kissed her full on the mouth. “I knew I married you for a reason.”

  Twenty

  MITSUKO LEFT ME with an oversized T-shirt and pajama pants. “I’m just down the hall if you need anything.” She smiled as she paused, hand on the door. “Good night, Cass. I’m so glad you’re back safe.”

  Her words made me remember all those people who had not returned safe. Luka’s family. My crew, my former instructors, all experienced astronauts: Bolshakov, Copeland, Shaw, Jeong.

  Luka.

  I changed, slipped under the blankets, and closed my eyes. But instead of sleep, I was back on the deck of the megobari ship as it exploded around me. The blood and fire and destruction. I fell deeper and deeper into the memory, never able to emerge, never able to escape.

  I woke sweating, bolting upright in bed in the darkness of an unfamiliar room, clutching at my racing heart. A pale blue dawn glowed through the curtains, enough to illuminate the room.

  As I willed my heart to slow, I tried to recall what was real and what was a dream.

  Luka was not dead. I wouldn’t accept it.

  When I felt steady, I crept out of my room as quietly as I could and found the hall bathroom. I splashed water on my face and examined my reflection for the first time. It was like looking at someone you used to know. My hair was longer than it had ever been, my skin a pale shade of brown. My eyes looked shell-shocked and red. My frame was sickly, the muscles I’d earned after years of training wasted away.

  I finished and edged out of the bathroom, careful not to make too much noise in the quiet apartment. But then I heard sounds of dishes clinking in the kitchen, and the smell of coffee wafted down the hall.

  The kitchen was flooded with sunlight, windows open. I blinked in the light, surprised to see the collection of people seated together having breakfast. Everyone was here—even Hanna, who I’d forgotten about.

  It was almost like we were back in the competition, all of us together again in the cafeteria.

  I chose an open seat between Hanna and Emilio, and someone slid a plate of eggs and toast in front of me. Everyone else’s plates were nearly empty, with only the remains of breakfast on them. “Guys, what time is it? You shouldn’t have let me sleep so long.”

  “You needed it,” Hanna said beside me.

  “And it’s not that late,” Emilio said.

  I took a long drink of the orange juice beside my plate—Mitsuko had actual place settings complete with napkin rings; it was super intimidating—and shot a look at Hanna. “Where did you sleep last night?”

  She inclined her head toward the family room. “The couch.”

  I ate quickly while Mitsuko and Emilio looked up the best route on their phones.

  “Wait, you guys are using your real phones?” I sputtered. “You know people are looking for us? Tell me you didn’t type in the actual coordinates.”

  “Chill, Cass. We’re professionals. Suko and I worked out a way to—”

  His eyes flicked to Michael, who shook his head, covered his ears, and said, “I officially can’t hear any of this.”

  Emilio flashed a grin and said in a confidential tone, “Anyway, we’re anonymous. Just don’t worry about how.”

  “What’d you tell your girlfriend?” Hanna asked Emilio.

  “She’s taking a vacation back to her parents’ place in Michigan. I figured she’d be okay there. Luckily, she trusts me enough to just take my word that maybe she should get away for a while. And with this alien ship in the sky . . . well, let’s just say that a lot of people have been acting strange.”

  I nodded. “I’m sorry, Emilio. Really.”

  He shook himself out, gave me a smile I didn’t believe. “Hell, Cass. This is the next best thing to going into space. We get to save the world without ever having to leave the great state of Texas. Best of both worlds.”

  Michael cleared the plates away, started the dishwasher, and all of a sudden we were leaving, turning off lights and locking the door behind us.

  I felt a sudden pang of guilt. They were leaving their homes and lives for me, and none of us knew when—or if—we’d be able to come back. This was too much sacrifice. And they didn’t even know the worst part.

  I stopped at the front door. I couldn’t let them go into this not knowing the whole truth. “Guys. There’s something you should know. Luka and I . . . The megobari had hidden a weapon they’d devised to use against the vrag. And we . . . we brought it back. We’re not sure what it does or even how it works. And it’s . . . big, you guys. But it might be our only chance to win this thing.”

  Hanna snorted. “Better and better.”

  Emilio’s eyes went wide, and he made the sign of the cross.

  Mitsuko gave him a bewildered look. “I’ve never seen you do that before.”

  “Yeah, well, no one ever told me that we’re about to be caught in the middle of a war between two advanced alien species who both outgun us AND we have an alien nuke. I’m just hedging my bets.”

  “Where is it now?” Michael asked, concern etching his brow.

  “It’s hidden. Or should be. Somewhere near the safe house.”

  Mitsuko gave an exasperated sigh. “Then we’d better get going, kiddos, before somebody else finds it first.”

  The car Michael had rented was some kind of SUV, big and shiny and silver, with bags presumably full of the supplies Mitsuko had bought piled in the back. Mitsuko got behind the wheel and I sat in the back beside Hanna, while Emilio took shotgun.

  Michael was leaning in the driver’s-side window, murmuring good-byes to Mitsuko. They’d decided he would stay behind. He’d be more useful to us at home, with the resources from his job, if we needed help.

  The air-conditioning was still blowing hot, new-car-scented air in my face; the leather was sticky against my thighs. The hours ahead of us weighed on me. I’d flipped open the communicator Luka had given me a dozen times, but nothing happened.

  It was taking all my energy to not focus on why I couldn’t get in touch with him.

  Once we pulled onto the interstate, Mitsuko turne
d on self-driving mode and swiveled her chair toward me. “Have you called your parents yet?” Seeing the look on my face, her eyes narrowed into laserlike points. “Cassandra Gupta, you have an untraceable phone and eight solid hours in the car ahead of you. Call your family. Right. This. Instant.”

  I groaned, head hitting the back of the seat. And called up the communication module in the armrest.

  It was a Tuesday. Midmorning. The sun was already bathing the roads with shimmering waves of heat. So I wasn’t surprised when Dadi’s face appeared on the screen in front of me—except for the slight bit of surprise that she knew how to answer the video chat. Tears sprang to my eyes instantly. Dadi looked so much older, her gray hair frizzy in its loose bun, her eyes a bit confused and unfocused until she realized it was me.

  She actually jumped away from the computer as though it had shot sparks, and then her face became so huge on the screen I was pretty sure she picked up the laptop and physically brought it to her face. A string of her surprised curse words was like music to my ears. “It can’t be. Cassandra Gupta, what are you doing calling home? Your parents are worried sick. They called NASA, they called everyone looking for you! Where are you?”

  “I’m safe, Dadi,” I replied. “I’m back from . . . from space. I can’t come home yet. Tell Mama and Papa I’m sorry. I miss you and love you guys. But I can’t come home yet. I still have work to do.”

  She was already shaking her head. “No, no, no. Enough now. Your mother has endured enough. You come home now.”

  “Dadi, I can’t. Please understand.”

  “Are you in trouble? Is someone keeping you locked in a room? Blink your eyes if yes! I will have your chacha trace this call and we will come and get you!”

  Though I doubted my grandmother’s faith in my uncle’s ability to perform such a feat, I didn’t doubt she’d sic the FBI or the Texas Rangers or whomever she could get to come after me in a heartbeat. “No! Nobody is keeping me locked in a room. I’m perfectly safe and with friends. Dadi, is Uncle Gauresh there? Can I see him?”

  “He is out walking Saachi. You can see him when you come home! What’s so important it would keep you from coming home? I’m getting old, you know. I might die soon!”