Vows of Revenge

by Dani Collins

  ‘You should have done this about two months ago.’

  Each matter-of-fact word lacerated her heart, almost annihilating the love for him she’d carried in her heart since she’d left the island. Each carefully spoken word proved she had been nothing more than a convenient amusement.

  Whatever her dreams of Nikos had been, to him she’d only been a passing fancy—a brief encounter that didn’t require commitment, just soft words and passionate kisses. One he thought he could brush aside when it suited him. But things had changed and now he had to acknowledge the situation.

  Enraged by his attitude, and all she’d learnt, she faced up to him, the fire of determination scorching through her. ‘For the past two and a half months I have been somewhat preoccupied with nausea.’

  Each sharp word flew at him like a dagger. The injustice of his accusation was stinging, giving her the strength to stand her ground. After desperately keeping her pregnancy from her family, the strain was too much. He was pushing her almost to breaking point.

  ‘You could have called. I did, after all, ask to be told.’

  His blue eyes had become so dark and forbidding they were like the hidden depths of the ocean. Unknown and uninviting.

  ‘Ask?’ The word rushed from her, wrapped tightly in disbelief. ‘You didn’t ask anything. You demanded.’

  His eyes hardened, glinting like icicles as the full moon shone on them and fixed her to the spot. ‘I was doing the right thing. I asked that you tell me if you became pregnant. I did not demand anything of you. It would only have taken one call, Serena. Why wait so long? Why now?’

  ‘I needed time to think—to decide what I was going to do.’ She’d thought herself into circles. Total panic had made any kind of sensible thought impossible, but even then the answer had been the same.

  Nikos had no intention of being a father. She would have to bring up her child alone. Such thoughts had driven her mad with fear and panic, as had the conviction that her mother would be devastated. Her daughter falling pregnant after little more than a one-night stand would be too much of a nightmare for her to deal with. And she wasn’t a naive teenager, which would only make her mother’s reaction worse. She always worried about what other people thought of her—that was why she’d hidden the sham of her marriage behind a facade of happiness.

  At twenty-three Serena should have known better. But, having purposely kept any advances at arm’s length, she hadn’t.

  The experience of making love with a man was something she’d planned to share with someone she loved. So when Nikos had sauntered into her life, sweeping her off her feet, she’d known almost from the moment they’d met where it would end. She’d given Nikos, the man she’d fallen instantly in love with, her most precious gift.

  In doing so she’d let everyone down. But worse to bear was the pain she would cause her sister.

  ‘To decide what you were going to do?’

  She saw his brows quirk together savagely as his gruff voice startled her out of her thoughts.

  ‘Yes—do.’ He was beginning to exasperate her. He was making her do all the work in this conversation, forcing every word from her when he didn’t even have the decency to admit his deceit. Was it a form of punishment?

  ‘And have you thought?’

  The powerful aura radiating from him was something she hadn’t noticed before, even though they’d spent almost every evening of her time on the island together. Not only did he look different, he acted differently. This Nikos was totally in command, completely intimidating—and, worse than anything else, he was without care or kindness.

  She met it head-on with a cold indifference that hid the panic and nerves she really felt.

  ‘Yes, I’ve thought, Nikos. I’ve thought of your lies, and of those callous words you threw at me the last time I saw you. I’ve thought of nothing other than your insistence that I inform you of any consequences.’

  His mouth was set in a grim line of irritation, but she pushed on. Behind him the sky displayed beautiful oranges and deep purples, and she wondered how such a stunning sunset could play host to this terrible moment.

  ‘It seems I’m now to be punished for not telling you as soon as I knew, but—more fool me—I wanted to tell you personally. Face-to-face. Not in a phone call. And that meant waiting until now—until I felt well enough to travel.’

  ‘Yet you can’t.’ He moved closer, his words coming out in a provoking growl. ‘You can’t say it, can you?’

  ‘Oh, I can, Nikos—I can.’ Fury charged through her like a tornado. Her heart raced and each breath she took became deeper. He was killing her love, shattering any hope she had harboured. Despite the turmoil her mind was in, the irrational sway of emotions, she flung the words he wanted to hear forcefully at him. ‘I’m pregnant, Nikos. I’m pregnant with your child.’

  ‘Why have you come all this way, Serena? What exactly do you want from me?’

  He stepped closer, towering over her, intimidating. She hated the way her breath caught in her throat, hated the way her body longed for his even as his icy words splintered around her.

  ‘I don’t want anything from you. At least not from Nikos the fisherman—but that isn’t you, is it?’ She lifted her chin, aiming for defiance—which was far from the uncertainty she was fighting so hard to conceal.

  His eyes narrowed and he pierced her with a fierce stare. ‘How much?’

  Serena’s mind swam with confusion. What was he talking about? ‘How much what?’

  She backed away, unable to deal with the close proximity of his body. How had she ever thought coming to the island was a good idea? She’d wanted to tell him face-to-face to convince herself that any hope of more was futile, knowing it would be the only way to prevent that what if feeling.

  ‘Money.’

  He spat the word at her so venomously she stepped back even further, until the backs of her legs met the large rock she’d been sitting on whilst waiting for him. She’d never thought telling him would be easy, but this was totally unexpected. Did he think she was here just for financial gain?

  ‘I don’t want your money.’ Her head began to swim and giddiness threatened, but she couldn’t stop now. Not until she’d told him everything. ‘All I wanted to do was tell you in person and leave.’

  She looked up at him, wishing things were different—that he hadn’t lied, that he hadn’t said the words that still replayed over and over in her mind. ‘You will tell me.’ The insistent way he’d delivered them had left her in no doubt that fathering a child was the last thing he wanted.

  She took in a deep and silent breath and thought of her sister, and the heartbreak she and her husband had been through each time IVF had failed. It seemed so unfair to find out that she’d become pregnant so easily when her sister was breaking her heart, wanting a child. It was just too cruel, and it had left her unable to say anything to her family, let alone confide in her sister. The only person she’d told was Nikos. And right now he was making her feel alone and isolated.

  Her time with Nikos had been nothing more than a holiday romance—one of many for him, she was sure. But for her it had changed everything—for ever—and he’d just confirmed her worst fear. He was going to turn his back on her and his child.

  She briefly closed her eyes against the torrent of emotions that coursed through her. Pain induced by Nikos, infused with the ever-present hurt of knowing she’d been an unexpected addition to her family, forcing her parents to stay together. If only Nikos felt something for her everything might be different, but that was evidently a hopeless dream. She should walk away now—for her baby’s sake, if not hers.

  ‘You think you can tell me I am about to be a father and then just leave?’

  He moved away from her, towards the ebbing tide, and turned to look out at the sea. His broad shoulders were tense, but she was glad she
wasn’t under his scrutiny any longer.

  I don’t know what to do. The words screamed inside her head as intense pain stabbed at her heart. She pressed the pads of her fingers to her closed eyes. Going down that line of thought now wouldn’t accomplish anything.

  Guilt boiled inside her—as if she’d stolen something from her sister. Especially as she knew there wouldn’t be any more IVF for her after the last treatment. Her sister and her husband didn’t have any savings left.

  ‘How can we raise a child, Nikos?’

  Her words were a tremulous whisper as she moved to stand beside him. The rush of the waves suddenly sounded loud on the beach as she looked at his profile. Not for the first time, she wondered who this man was.

  Images of the handsome man she’d had an affair with filled her mind as she looked away and out across the sea. The setting sun was almost gone from the sky. But she didn’t see its beauty. All she saw was Nikos, the man she’d given her heart to, believing she loved him and that he might love her. During those long, hot days his dark hair had gleamed beneath the sun and his blue eyes had filled with desire each time they’d met.

  He had been everything she’d ever dreamed of and more, sweeping her away so fast she’d given up her teenage dreams of waiting to find her true love before discovering the pleasure of intimacy with a man. She didn’t regret one moment of that decision. She’d loved Nikos—until he’d looked at her with his condemning eyes on that last night.

  He didn’t respond and instinctively she reached out to him, touching his arm. As he turned and looked at her she saw his face wore an expression of pain, and she had the unexpected urge to throw herself into his arms, to be held tight and told everything was going to be okay. Because deep down it was what she wanted—what she needed. To be loved by only this man. But the man she loved didn’t exist.

  Instead she stood as tall and proud as possible, finding strength she hadn’t realised she had left. ‘We can’t, Nikos. Not together.’

  * * *

  ‘What are you saying, Serena?’ Nikos all but stumbled over his words as the implications of what she’d said almost silenced him. The reality of the situation had hit him hard, taking away the ability to speak.

  Memories of the day his mother had left and questions from his past rushed forward. He tried hard to prevent them from colliding with the present, but he couldn’t shake them off. His father had cursed her, saying he should never have married an English girl, and Nikos had stood alone, ignored and forgotten by each of them. Then his mother had left, her cruel parting words ringing in his ears.

  If his father had still been alive he could have found out more about the mother he barely remembered. As a teenager he’d been angry when he’d learnt that her career had been more important than her marriage and her young son. So when she’d made contact on his sixteenth birthday, saying she’d never meant to hurt him, he’d blocked her from his life. He didn’t want to open that door again.

  He clenched his hands into tight fists. Fury carried through the years raged inside him, but he pushed it back. He had to keep calm.

  That letter from his mother had made him vow never to marry. He had no intention of making the same mistake as his parents. But that vow also denied him the possibility of being a father.

  Something shifted inside him. Serena was carrying his child. He took in a deep, steadying breath. He was going to be a father. Fate had altered his life decision and no matter what Serena did or said he would be a father to his child in every way. His past would not write his child’s future. His child would not experience the heartache he’d known and he’d do everything in his power to achieve that.

  ‘Neither of us can give this child what it needs.’

  Her voice was soft, with a definite and unyielding firmness. He looked down at her, hardly able to believe what he was hearing. He couldn’t comprehend the cool and composed words that had slipped easily from her mouth. She was writing off her child as easily as his mother had done.

  An icy-cold chill slipped down his spine and the image of the woman before him combined with that of the fair-haired woman in the tatty photograph he’d kept hidden away since he’d been given it by his grandmother. It was his mother—but as far as he was concerned it was just the woman who’d given birth to him. He’d locked it away, out of sight and out of mind, hating her too much to acknowledge her as his mother.

  Serena blinked rapidly and he thought he saw a glimmer of moisture, the smallest hint of tears. He narrowed his eyes, assessing the situation. His breath, deep and hard, almost burned his chest as his heart was pumped full of anger, his mouth filled with the bitter taste of betrayal as he remembered what had sounded like a throwaway comment at the time.

  Had she planned this from the very start? She’d seduced him so wickedly with her kisses that last night on the beach that he’d lost all control. Had that been her intention all along?

  He furrowed his brow, resisting the need to put distance between them. She’d been a virgin the first time they’d made love, which had shocked him so much that he’d fallen under her spell, wanting to spend more and more time with her, yet unable to allow himself to want her emotionally. Had he been naive to be seduced by her?

  ‘I never planned to be a father, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be there for my child.’

  He clenched his fists against the fear of what those words meant. Could he really be a good father when his own had ignored him so much that his grandparents had been compelled to taken him in?

  ‘I will.’

  A spark of something akin to fear mingled with hope showed in her eyes as she moved closer. ‘You want to raise the baby with me?’

  He shut his heart to the image of a happy family, slamming the door firmly. ‘That won’t be possible, will it? Not if you have already decided to give it away like a parcel.’

  ‘I haven’t decided any such thing.’ She glared at him like a wounded animal, wary and untrusting.

  ‘You constantly spoke of your sister—about her longing for a baby. Do you recall what you told me?’ The harsh words growled from him, and before she could reply he pressed on. ‘“If I could have a baby for her, I would.” Those were your exact words.’

  ‘How can you twist things like that? It’s what I wished I could do—not what I planned.’

  Disappointment rushed over him like a waterfall. When she’d asked if he wanted to raise the baby with her he’d almost allowed himself to believe it was what she wanted, that it could be possible. How foolish.

  ‘Did you really think you could come here and use the baby—my baby—as a bargaining tool to get money for your sister? Or, worse, give my baby to her?’

  She pushed slim fingers through the thickness of her red hair, distracting him momentarily.

  ‘No. That’s not how it is. This is my baby.’

  ‘It’s my baby too, Serena.’ Fury thundered in his veins, pulsing around him so fast he couldn’t think straight. It was obvious she’d done her homework. She knew who he was. But was she really capable of seducing him, hoping to become pregnant with a baby for her sister? If he was thinking rationally he’d say no, but with such a revelation knocking him sideways he’d believe anything right now.

  As she stood there, glaring angrily at him, challenging him on every level, he knew he had to be there for his baby as it grew up. He wanted to give it all he’d never had. But it didn’t matter how much money he had, he didn’t know if he could do the one thing a father should. Love his child—or anyone.

  How could he when he’d never known the love of his parents? And he’d always kept his distance from his grandparents, shunned their love, preferring to stay safe behind his defences even as a young boy. But he had a bond with them. Could he at least bond with his child?

  Was he heartless? Was that why his mother had turned her back on him? Why his father had
barely looked at him? Was it his fault?

  ‘I will be there for my child.’ He watched her for a hint of guilt, any trace of her deceit.

  ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

  The fury in her voice overflowed, confirming his suspicions.

  ‘Drop the innocent act. You know who I am. For a woman with your journalist’s training it must have been all too easy to discover more about the father or your child.’ Venom spiked every word as he looked at her, suddenly becoming aware of the waves creeping closer to them. How long had they been discussing this? Hours? Seconds? He didn’t know. Only that it would change things and change him for ever.

  ‘I have only just looked you up on the internet—in the departure lounge at the airport, to be exact. Because, stupidly, I believed you were an island fisherman, living a simple life. There shouldn’t have been anything more to know.’ Her furious words were flung at him and her eyes sparked like fireworks. ‘You lied to me, used me.’

  So the flame-haired temptress had a temper!

  ‘Just as you lied to me—using me, the “simple fisherman”, as a means to an end.’

  ‘I didn’t use you at all.’

  ‘So you deny you seduced me in the hope of getting pregnant with a child you planned to give to your sister?’

  She gasped in shock, her acting skills well and truly on display. ‘Of course I do.’

  ‘In that case I won’t be upsetting your plans.’

  ‘And what does that mean?’

  Her temper flared again. Begrudgingly he admired her spirit. She was even more beautiful when the fire of determination rose up within her.

  ‘Only that I have every possible means at my disposal and I will be a father to my child, no matter what obstacles you put in my way. I will remove each and every one to get what I want. My child. My heir.’

  Copyright © 2015 by Rachael Thomas

  ISBN-13: 9781460386392

  Vows of Revenge

  Copyright © 2015 by Dani Collins