“Mom says that about you, too.” Kelsey inched forward in the line, glad to have something else to think about.
“So I knew I had to help her get settled. I showed her where all the good junk food was stashed. Gave her lots of hugs when things at school were going awful. I just...made sure I was there. And she did the same for me. It wasn’t all sunshine, but having each other to lean on helped. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“That family is important?”
“Yes, that’s the first part. The second part is accepting their help and comfort.”
Kelsey churned the words over in her brain. She prided herself on logic and facts and being in control. But this? What Aunt Ashlynn had told her? It was about letting other people have control, which was scary, too.
Locked in thought, Kelsey moved toward the zip line waiting line. Nerves cranking again, she figured she had nothing to lose by trying something different. By taking Aunt Ashlynn’s advice and letting someone else guide her through something frightening.
So she counted five things she saw...a brown bird in the tree, the instructor’s bright orange vest, a pile of gray rocks stacked in the stream—
Suddenly, Ashlynn’s arm shot out and brought her up short.
“Kelsey, stop,” she cautioned softly but with undeniable intensity.
A big, skinny mongrel stood in front of a bush, teeth bared. Growling. Hackles raised. Not at all one of the friendly Top Dog canines. This was an animal in full defensive mode.
Then she heard it, the other, softer noises. Tiny little yips and squeaks coming from the underbrush nearby. She took a closer look back at the furry beast and realized all that hair almost covered milk-filled teats.
And then she realized, the dog wasn’t mean and aggressive. The mama was protecting her litter of puppies.
Chapter Twelve
With the final minutes ticking away until they had to leave the little getaway cabin at noon, Douglas drew his wife to his side, both of them naked under the quilt. Her soft body pressed against him as she rested her head on his chest as they took a catnap after waking up to make love again. He breathed in the scent of her hair. He’d missed sharing a bed with her, the scent of their lovemaking around them.
No matter how much he had of Nina—whether it was sex or just holding her—he never could get enough. He skimmed a hand up and down her spine, sated for now, hoping their time away had been enough to earn him a second chance.
Or at the very least, a chance at a second chance.
After they’d made love in the cave, they’d packed up their meal. Dinner had been decadent. Rosemary and garlic-encrusted prime rib. Mashed potatoes with creamy gravy. Butter-soaked green beans. Red wine he tasted on Nina’s tongue as they kissed before they’d driven to their getaway cabin. Dishes huddled together on the green painted dresser, messy stacks testifying to the aftermath of late-night snacking. He was especially pleased with the dessert choice, something called a mountain stack cake, steeped in an old tradition when guests would each bring a layer. She’d smiled so beautifully when he’d told her, he felt like he’d won the lottery.
Unlike the cabin he, Nina, and the girls had been sharing, this one-room space boasted intimacy, a sentiment reinforced by how the pale morning light bounced off the pine wood walls. Scents of apple and cinnamon permeated the air, coming from the wax burner shaped like a puppy. The quaint atmosphere reminded him of the bachelor pad over the barn where his brother had lived, the same space where Ashlynn had stayed for six months.
Thank goodness for Ashlynn watching the kids and making the date night possible. He wondered if he could persuade her to leave North Carolina and move back to the farm—He stopped that thought short. Was he honestly considering keeping the place after all?
Even the possibility stirred a wary hope in him he wasn’t sure he was ready to consider. It felt too...perfect. It felt like a dream he’d already released once, and it nearly killed him. How could he manage a loss like that again if he couldn’t figure out a way to keep the place for good?
Nina traced circles with her fingers along his chest. “Thank you for planning everything. It was good to get away.”
“I wish I had done something like this sooner.” He cupped her bottom and pulled her closer.
She slung a smooth leg over his, smiling with a hint of languid seduction in her amber-brown eyes. “We’re not out of time yet.”
Chuckling, he dropped a lingering kiss on her lips, indulging himself in a leisurely caress of her beautiful breasts. Even more than he wanted to keep the farm, he wanted more of these lazy mornings in bed with her. He should have recognized that earlier. Put her first sooner.
If he was going to make that happen, he would need to woo her with more than sex. He needed to dig deep, deeper than he’d ever imagined possible to give her what she wanted. Trying to be romantic, more open. Stepping out on a limb like this was scary, the stakes higher than ever if he failed.
Nina shifted under the covers. “I’m not sure when there would have been time back home.”
Dig deep, he reminded himself. “I should have figured it out. I was just so worried—” afraid “—that something bad would happen if I was away.”
“You aren’t responsible for every bad thing that happens in the world.” Natural light filtering in through the limbs of nearby trees cast her warm brown eyes in tender shadows.
“And to think we were sure everything would be perfect if the twins just survived.” He scrubbed a hand along his chest, right over where his heart squeezed. “But I saw them and kept thinking how my parents died and here I was about to lose my children.”
Sometimes, the bitterness of hope wrecked him. The idea that once this storm passed, everything would just work out. They’d suffered through enough.
“I didn’t know you were feeling that then.” She tipped her face up to look at him, stroking his cheek. “I’m sorry I couldn’t step outside of my own fears enough to see yours so we could comfort each other.”
Before he could stop himself, the words poured out. “Just when I felt like I was getting my feet under me again, losing Tyler brought back the full weight of those memories crashing down.”
Her fingers stilled on his jaw. “Why didn’t you tell me you were feeling this way when we were losing Tyler? Or afterward?”
Because sharing that piece of himself might have cracked him wide-open. It had been all he could do to get up every day to take care of the farm and his family.
“I’m telling you now,” he said carefully instead. “Is it too late?”
Time paused. He could hear the steady tick-tick-tick of the wrought iron clock on the wall across from the bed.
“I don’t know. I honestly don’t.” She looked away, as if meeting his eyes could offer an invitation she wasn’t willing to extend. “I do know I can’t even consider a future together if the next time we have a crisis in our lives you shut down altogether. Maybe we can get lifetime membership cards to the Top Dog Dude Ranch.”
“That’s not funny.”
She shot a sidelong glance at him. “Sure it is, a little bit at least.”
“Okay, maybe a little.” Especially if that meant they would still be coming as a family. His heart knocked against his rib cage. Relief tangled up with all the other feelings roiling in his gut at dredging up old memories and yes, even the good stuff from being with Nina through the night.
God, he hoped this emotional purging paid off because he was gutted, depleted. He didn’t have another word left to offer her. Usually when he felt twitchy like this, he found something to fix on the farm. If Nina had been right about what he needed to do to rekindle their relationship, could she also be on the mark that he may have overlooked a way to save their home and livelihood?
The chime of an incoming text pulled him back from his thoughts. He’d put his phone on Do Not Disturb, only
allowing for three numbers to push through that setting.
Jacob O’Brien and Ashlynn, in case there was an emergency with the girls.
And the Jacksons, for if there was a problem at the farm.
Both scenarios made his stomach clench.
Dread dropped him back into the realities of his daily life and he angled away to grab his cell off the bedside table. “I should get that. It could be about the kids.”
Nina placed a hand between his shoulder blades. “Is it the kids?”
Sitting up straighter, he pulled open the text... His stomach dropped. “No, it’s the Jacksons back home. There’s a problem at the farm.”
* * *
Braiding her hair, Nina braced her boots against the truck’s floorboards as they jostled over a pothole in the mountain road. Once that text came through, there hadn’t been time to shower—or talk. They’d just thrown on their clothes and dashed out the door.
How different things had felt in the seat of their pickup fourteen hours ago. Memories of their time in the cabin stirred phantom sensations of longing. Her husband’s roving hands across her thighs. Her need to touch him. Their closeness, a connection she hadn’t felt in longer than she cared to admit.
And today?
A quick glance to the driver’s seat gave Nina the sensation of free-falling, stomach dropping level after level with no parachute to deploy. Nina watched Douglas as he thumbed his phone, eyes half on the brightly lit screen as he turned into the driveway for the cabin. Worry knit his brows together, causing hard lines to surface in his forehead and around the edges of his eyes.
Douglas had become distant after the text, even more so after calling the Jacksons. She recognized his mood. He was more than withdrawn. He’d shut down altogether. Their fantasy evening was over and reality was back in full force.
One brief message about broken machinery was all it had taken for Douglas to bolt out of bed and insist they head back to the Top Dog Dude Ranch. She had to confess, she was nervous, too.
His cell phone rang right as he pulled the truck alongside Ashlynn’s compact car.
“It’s the Jacksons again,” he said brusquely before answering. “Yeah, hello?” Douglas’s baritone voice filled the truck cab as he turned off the engine.
The girls waved from the cabin window, blissfully unaware of the latest struggle in their parents’ rocky marriage. Kacie and Kelsey rushed out the cabin door, chattering excitedly. Douglas held a finger to his lips, waving them off toward Nina. Worry radiated from him in waves.
“So can you tell me more?” Douglas said, blue eyes widening as he made his way around the back of the cabin to continue his call.
Kelsey and Kacie tugged on Nina’s red sweater, leading her inside. But her mind was half out of the cabin, panic and worry igniting her steps. She did her best to take a steadying breath before crossing the threshold.
Ashlynn sat at the small, squat table where she did an exaggerated point toward a plate piled high with what smelled like fresh-baked sugar and chocolate chip cookies. Through the window, she could see Douglas pacing around the yard on his cell phone. Thank goodness the kids didn’t notice.
Kelsey waved a sugar cookie in the air excitedly. “Did you two have fun? We had a blast last night on the wagon ride and stargazing.”
Kacie trailed her sister. “Kelsey was really good at naming the constellations. She found Pegasus and Aquarius. Those aren’t easy ones, either.”
“Thanks, but you helped me find Andromeda.” Kelsey’s eyes sparkled and the girls exchanged smiles for what felt like the first time in ages.
Ashlynn had worked some kind of minor miracle. And even though Nina feared a crisis brewing at home, she still took a moment to appreciate the joy of seeing a warm, sisterly bond between her girls.
Hoping to keep the happy mood inside the cabin for at least a little longer, Nina kept the conversation going to prevent the girls from seeing their dad’s body language outside. “How was zip-lining?”
Ashlynn fluffed her dark curls, the sound of her thin metal bracelets sliding and clanging. “Well, that part of our day got canceled because of another kind of excitement.”
“Really?” Nina asked in surprise, grateful for the distraction from her worries. “What happened?”
Kacie swallowed down her cookie before launching to her feet, full of animation. “A rabid dog came running out of the woods, right at us.”
A fresh layer of her already-mounting panic tore through her chest. Images of a foaming, lunging dog had her trembling, reaching to check over her children and be sure they were unharmed.
Ashlynn rested a reassuring hand on Nina’s arm. “The dog wasn’t rabid and no one got charged. And definitely no one was bitten, or even scratched. The dog had a collar with a rabies tag. And it also had a litter of puppies.”
Kacie continued, talking in rapid-fire excitement, “When we called the vet to trace the rabies tag, they found the owner. Some jerk dumped the mama and her babies in the woods. But we called Mr. and Mrs. O’Brien and they came with all the right equipment to catch them safely and take them back to the ranch. It was so exciting, right, Kelsey?”
“Sure was,” Kelsey agreed. “Their vet is looking over them now, but Mrs. O’Brien said if the doctor gives the okay, we can come see the puppies later, as long as we don’t get too close. If you give us permission.”
Kelsey clasped her hands together. “Please, please, please.”
Kacie offered the plate of cookies like a bribe. “Pretty please.”
Taking a sugar cookie with orange sprinkles, Nina glanced at the window. Douglas was still on the phone, pacing. The tension in his shoulders and his jaw indicated the news was bad. Really bad. What if they had to leave early? The girls would be devastated.
And so would she. She hadn’t realized until just this moment how strong the flicker of hope had grown inside her after her night with Douglas, and she had no idea what to do with that.
Her hands trembling, she set her cookie on a napkin before she crushed it. “We’ll see. First, I need to talk with your father.”
To find out if they were one step closer to losing their home. She couldn’t imagine any other scenario that would have Douglas so worked up. A sick animal would be upsetting, but they could manage a vet bill. This looked like something bigger.
As she stared down at the plate of cookies, her vision blurring with tears, she wanted to hope they could still save the farm. She’d told Douglas so often that they could do it if they thought outside the box and looked for more ways to generate income. But had she been delusional? Desperate? Deep down, she couldn’t help but fear that her insistence they could save the place was nothing more than a need to replace what she’d lost as a kid.
* * *
Douglas charged up the cabin steps, mentally clicking through what he needed to accomplish before hitting the road to go home. Movement had always been his answer, his default setting when his carefully curated plans exploded.
Today was no different.
Striding through the cabin’s great room, he dimly registered the girls offering him cookies. He swiped a couple off the plate, going through the motions of politeness on his way to the bedroom. He stuffed the cookies in his mouth, on autopilot as he clicked on the lights and tugged out his old brown duffel.
All he had to do was get packed. That was the plan of action after his conversation with the Jacksons. Pack now. Drive. Figure out a plan.
The motor on the vacuum pump for their primary milking machine had burned out. And since Hershel Jackson was a seasoned mechanic, if he said it was busted beyond repair, that was as good as a death sentence for the machinery.
There wasn’t enough money in the bank to purchase a new one, and without the current one in good working order, he wasn’t even sure he could get a decent bid on the property. Certainly not as much as he would need to
put a down payment on a place for Nina to live with the girls.
If they couldn’t keep up with the cows’ milk production, the animals would be in agony, even risking infection. Repairs would be costly, but absolutely crucial.
His hands clenched into fists, his fingers digging into the thick flannel of his folded shirts. With a steady breath—steadiness he did not feel—he tossed his shirts into the suitcase.
Levelheaded, cool action was needed.
But at what cost?
So much for changing the trajectory of his life. He’d enjoyed what—a whole few hours of hope for the farm? He should have known there was no way to buy into Nina’s pie-in-the-sky notions that somehow the family land could be saved. He’d known months ago that he’d given it his best and his best wasn’t enough. It had been purely wishful thinking to believe anything different.
Anger at the injustice of it all left a sour taste in his mouth that threatened to undo him.
Douglas heard the door click shut. Without looking up, he could feel Nina’s eyes boring into his back. The weight of her stare added to the burden of failure already bludgeoning him.
She cleared her throat. “What did the Jacksons have to say?”
He didn’t turn around, couldn’t face her as the impact of their predicament struck deep into him. He opened another drawer, pulling out socks. “What are the girls doing?”
“They’re with Ashlynn. She’s taking them to the pumpkin-carving party.” She touched his arm. “Douglas? You didn’t answer my question. What did the Jacksons have to say when you talked to them?”
“I have to go.” His eyes flickered to hers and caught there for a moment.
“The girls are going to be crushed.”
The disappointment on her face was so much Douglas had to turn away. He broke their gaze, heading to the tall wardrobe in the corner of the room.
Last-Chance Marriage Rescue Page 15
