Never Coming Home

by Evonne Wareham

  But you might have tried.

  Maybe he would try? He couldn’t be a father to Bobby Hoag’s baby, or even an uncle, but maybe he could be a friend to Bobby’s son. Oh, Christ, maybe it would be a daughter, with her mother’s blonde hair and her daddy’s eyes.

  Children. That’s where all this had started. Two children, one with long blonde hair and the other with dark, and an ocean between them. Two young girls, and a need for justice. And now the grief he would always carry, until death finally took him. Love. The silent killer.

  He shrugged away from the window, with one last look around. He wouldn’t find her here. He wouldn’t find her anywhere, not now.

  He picked up the box and headed to the door, and the rest of his life.

  Kaz unpacked the contents of the suitcase and laid it out on the bed, grinning. Her mother’s idea of an outfit for a manhunt included the sleekly fitted lace top, a slimline skirt and killer heels. She slithered into the clothes, twisting her hair up high and anchoring it with a jewelled clip. Her hands were trembling as she fastened the matching necklace. A slick of lip gloss and she was done. She picked up her bag and headed for the door.

  She paid the cab at the end of the street, looking around curiously. She’d expected the address on the card to be an apartment in the city, but this was a neighbourhood of wide lawns and white-painted porches. She recognised Devlin’s house immediately. It was the one with the For Sale sign outside.

  There was a hire van parked by the kerb. Kaz caught her breath as Devlin emerged from the house, carrying a box. The bruises were healed and the plaster cast had been replaced by a brace on his left arm. The well-worn jeans, faded almost white, clung low on his hips. The writing on his sweatshirt was even more faded. His hair was brushing his collar.

  Kaz took a shaky step and then another. ‘If you ever run out on me again, Devlin, I’m going to hunt you down and shoot you.’

  His head jerked round. She couldn’t read his face. It looked completely blank. He set the box down carefully. ‘Is that a promise?’

  ‘Of course it is, you bloody idiot.’ She cleared the last few steps in a leap, landing in his arms. She heard his breath woof out as she thudded into his chest, then her own breathing stopped entirely as his mouth came down on hers in a crushing kiss.

  Her head was swimming and her knees were weak when they came up for air. She had to cling to him, to stay upright. She wasn’t going to let that stop her. She thumped him, with the heel of her hand.

  ‘I love you. I came all the way across an ocean to say that.’ She thumped him again. ‘I know you love me, you bastard, so say it.’

  ‘Hey! Ouch!’ He grabbed her hands, fending her off. ‘The kid squealed.’

  ‘Of course she did, she’s only five, but it took a month.’ Kaz wriggled in his arms, loving the feel of him against her body. ‘You told my daughter you loved me, before you told me. What’s she got that I don’t?’

  ‘Dimples?’ He had her anchored now, solid against his hips and chest. She relaxed against him. Just sank in. The kiss this time was long and soft and languorous. He rested his forehead against hers.

  ‘I love you.’

  ‘At last.’

  ‘I never said that to anyone before. Never knew what it meant. I do now. But I’m still not sure I should be saying it to you.’

  Kaz flinched. ‘You must know, I have said it. Which is why it’s taken me a while to even think about saying it again.’ She put her hands flat on his chest. ‘I can’t wipe out history. I had a marriage, I have a daughter. I come as part of a package, Devlin.’

  ‘I know that.’ He pushed her gently away from him. ‘And that’s why I can’t ask … I can’t expect … I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know how to make a family.’

  She held her breath. ‘Is this about Jamie, or about your past?’

  ‘God.’ He swore. ‘It’s not about Jamie, it’s about me. The stuff I’ve done, I shouldn’t be around a child.’

  ‘I wouldn’t have my child, if it wasn’t for you. And before you start on that tack, this isn’t gratitude.’ She waved a finger. ‘The stuff you’ve done. Are you still doing it?’

  ‘Well no, but –’

  Kaz didn’t allow for any buts. ‘I’ve asked you this before. Is there anyone else, like Luce, likely to come after you in the future?’

  He blinked. ‘No.’

  ‘In that case, done is done.’ She looked up at him, clear-eyed. ‘I know what I feel for you, Stuart Adams. I’ve never felt like this before. I trust you. I want you to take care of me.’ Something shivered up her spine. ‘I trust you with my life, with my heart, with my daughter. When I came around the corner and saw how close I got to losing you –’ she gestured over her shoulder to the rental van – ‘I knew exactly how much.’ She waved her hand. ‘Now I’m done. The rest is up to you. I, Katarina Elmore, need you. You want it in writing, you have it. You want to throw it all away, go ahead.’

  The corner of his mouth was turning up. The smile, when it bloomed, took her breath away. ‘You drive a hard bargain, woman.’ He scooped her up and put paid to any remaining trace of air that might have been hanging around in her lungs.

  ‘I want the whole thing.’ He finally put her down. ‘If we’re going to do this thing, then I want marriage. I want to be a father to Jamie, if she’ll have me.’

  Kaz knew she was going to cry. The water just squeezed out of her eyes. Devlin wiped it away with his thumbs.

  ‘She’ll have you.’

  ‘I figure I owe her.’ He lifted his head. ‘She’s the reason you came, right?’ Kaz nodded. He was frowning. ‘Barbie dolls – little girls like Barbie dolls, right? Or what about a pony? Would she like a pony?’

  ‘Probably.’ Kaz was laughing now. ‘I think a honeymoon in Disneyland will do, for the moment.’

  ‘Honeymoon.’ Devlin pulled her up off her feet again. ‘Is that a yes?’

  ‘It’s definitely a yes.’ She held him off from kissing her again, eyes sober. ‘You were about to disappear. If you need … if Jamie and I need to make a new life with you, somewhere else, then that’s okay.’

  ‘I …’ He stopped, thought. ‘We should talk about that – but no, we don’t have to go underground. I will have a new life. A wife and a family. Who’d have thought?’ The wonder in his face tugged at her heart. ‘Family.’ He looked like he was tasting the word.

  ‘I want six kids, you know,’ she said casually. ‘Jamie would love a little brother or a sister.’

  This time he gulped. ‘Uh – straight away?’

  He was stepping up to the plate, even though his face had gone white.

  She hid her delight, smothering the grin that wanted to burst out.

  ‘We can negotiate. Let’s see how you do with the family stuff first.’ She narrowed her eyes. ‘There are a few other questions and conditions.’

  ‘Of course.’ He’d straightened up, shoulders back.

  ‘For a start, do I have to have the scary woman you used to work for, to give you away?’

  Devlin shook his head. A grin was starting to form. ‘Only if you want to.’

  ‘Good.’ She ticked off on her fingers. His eyes were gleaming now. ‘Will this agreement involve a lot of crazy hot sex? Because if not, the deal is off.’

  He sucked his teeth. ‘I think I can manage that.’

  ‘Good.’ She nodded. ‘Then this one is the clincher. I want everyone to know I belong to you. I want a rock. The hugest, most obscene diamond ring you can find.’

  ‘No problem.’ Devlin pulled her tight into his arms. ‘It just so happens that I have these shares, in a diamond mine – ’

  About the Author

  Evonne Wareham

  Evonne was born in South Wales and spent her childhood there. After university she migrated to London, w
here she worked in local government, scribbled novels in her spare time and went to the theatre a lot. Now she’s back in Wales, writing and studying history and living by the sea. Her membership of the Romantic Novelists’ Association lets her enjoy the company of other authors and gives her an excuse to sneak back to London from time to time for essential stuff, like attending parties. She still loves the theatre, likes staying in hotels and enjoys walking on the beach, where she daydreams about her characters. She hopes that all those things come through in her books – drama, glamorous locations, engaging heroines and dangerous heroes.

  This is Evonne’s debut novel. Her second novel, Out of Sight, Out of Mind, will be published in 2013.

  For more information visit www.evonnewareham.com and Evonne’s blog at www.evonneonwednesday.blogspot.com

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