Crossing the Line

by Lauren Landish

  “And if I don’t? Are they going to hamstring one of the most promising minds I’ve met at this school since I started teaching here?”

  The Dean shakes his head. “No. She probably won’t get any good internships that she can’t get from her own hard work, but Stanford would be stupid to not accept her for the PhD program. She won’t get offered the associate professor’s slot that I know we’ve been scouting her for, but that’s it. As for you . . . if you hang on, they’ll make the hearing on your tenure revocation public. They have to by state law. And if that happens, this all comes out. The Board’s willing to take the hit on it.”

  “So resign or get shamed publicly,” I state, and the Dean nods miserably. “Tough choice.”

  “It is. I’m not going to say I have the same tastes, but I’m also not going to condemn you on it. I could tell, like you said, that it was consensual. And you obviously care about this girl. But there are other places out there than Stanford.”

  I nod, then take the letter the Dean gave me and tear it into four quarters slowly, handing them back to him. “Here, give this to the Board. Tell them that I honestly don’t give a fuck what they want to worry about. I knew exactly what the risks were when I started my relationship with Shawnie, and compared to her, this university doesn’t mean jack shit to me. So if they want to get rid of me because the two of us happen to enjoy the relationship we have, then they’re going to have to grow a set of balls and look me in the eye and say it. I’m not resigning.”

  I don’t know if he’s pleased or not when he takes the pieces of paper back from me, tucking them in his pocket. “I’ll take it to the Board. It’s my duty, then, to inform you that when the Board does call a hearing, you’re entitled to have a legal representative. There are some changes to the rules from a court hearing, but I’ll have Melanie bring by the file on what’s going to happen. If it matters, I’m hoping you stick around. You’re a good teacher, Rafe.”

  “One more thing,” I ask as the Dean gets up. “The CyberFighter?”

  “From what I know, the Pentagon doesn’t know anything. Your lab and your funding there are safe for now.” The Dean leaves, and I spend a few minutes trying to calm myself before my workout.

  I don’t want to tell Shawnie during that time. She’s got a class after lunch before lab time, and she’s not in a place where she’s ready to handle what just happened. And the last bit about the CyberFighter being safe? That’s just so much bullshit. The Pentagon might have let a public relations issue go back in the fifties or sixties, but this is the new era, where the PR men have as much influence as the engineers, the soldiers, and the bean counters.

  I’m getting my bag together when there’s a knock on my door and Melanie opens it, a thick softbound book in her hand. “Professor Meyers? The Dean asked me to bring this by.”

  “Thanks, Melanie,” I say, taking it and setting it on my desk. “Looks like some fun reading for Spring Break. A lot better than the Dean Koontz book I had planned.”

  Melanie laughs, but when I turn around, her face is haunted. “Professor . . . Rafe. If there’s anything I can do to help, just ask. I feel like this is partly my fault. If I hadn’t been so upset . . .”

  “You did nothing wrong,” I reassure her. “If anything, Melanie, you’re one of the people I most respect around this place. You do your job, you do it well, and you conduct yourself with class. Don’t blame yourself for this. This is me and a bunch of fearful people who think that they can control the world, when in reality, all you can do is control yourself.”

  Melanie smiles, nodding. “You should teach philosophy too. That bunch of blowhards could use some real wisdom around there.”

  I laugh, shaking my head. “I’d be in even more trouble over there. But thanks.”

  Melanie shakes her head and leaves, and I get my things, the anger starting to flare inside me again. I bury it, let it burn inside me, knowing that Shawnie’s going to wonder what’s going on, but I can keep my tongue until then.

  Either way, it looks like I might need to make another visit to The Club.

  Chapter 24

  Shawnie

  Watching Rafe torpedo through the water the way he is, I’m breathless even though my workout finished ten minutes ago. I was surprised at first that Rafe wanted something as supposedly normal as swimming, but at the same time, it turned me on to wear my new swimsuit, a one-piece with a mostly open back that allows my wings to be seen by everyone. During Spring Break, I’ve already tried to think of ways that I can wear backless outfits or outfits that highlight my wings as best I can.

  My watch beeps, and I see that regardless of whether Rafe’s tired or not, I’ve got a class to get to. I slap the water at the end of the lane, and when he reaches the end of the pool again, he stops, looking up at me. “Hey, what’s up?”

  “I’ve got class in twenty minutes,” I reply. “You mind if I head out?”

  Rafe looks up at the clock on the side of the pool area, blinking in surprise. “No, of course not. Listen, I didn’t get to talk about it, but when we get home, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

  I can’t help it, I feel the worry start to come back. “Is it . . . bad?”

  Rafe shakes his head, giving me a reassuring smile. “It’s nothing that we can’t get through. Go take care of class, and I’ll see you at the lab later. Remember, it’s just you and me today. Everyone else is off already.”

  I smile, trying to be brave, but still, as I get dressed for class, I worry. I get to class on time, and the test we have today is able to calm me down some, even if it is easy. Still, I go over my test, and I get concerned when I see that I’ve made a few errors. Easily correctable, but it’s the sort of mistakes that I don’t make often.

  I make the corrections and turn in the paper, leaving the lecture hall with time to spare. I’m in the quad when my phone rings, and I pick it up. The phone number has a Stanford exchange. “Hello?”

  “Hello, Shawnie,” Mr. Robinson says in my ear, chilling me to the bone. “I bet you’re wondering how I got this number.”

  “What do you want? Threatening me again?” I ask, trying to remember. I’m not the same girl he wanted to take advantage of. I can deal with this man, stand up to him. “It’s not going to work. I’m not going back to The Club.”

  “Last chance. You won’t embarrass me again like you’ve been doing. If you don’t come to The Club Saturday night to meet my associate, not only am I going to broadcast you getting whipped and ass fucked in Hi-Def around campus . . . well, let’s just say 154 Bull Street.”

  The ice in my veins goes to subzero as he says the street address of my family’s home in South Carolina. I try to scream out my reply, but what comes out is nothing more than a breathy whisper. “No.”

  “You have a day and some change to think about it. My friend won’t get here until nearly midnight, so you have plenty of time to get yourself as dolled up as you want. He won’t love you, but he’s the closest thing you’ll ever have to a Prince Charming. Oh, and he likes purple eyeshadow, so be sure to wear a lot of that. Remember, Bull Street.”

  The line goes dead and I stare at my phone, slipping it back into my backpack as I feel the familiar scream of glee inside me. The demon has found his way out again. Rafe could defend me against everything inside me, he could protect me and build me up . . . but Mr. Robinson already had a corruptor’s back door, a Trojan horse in the program that let him get right past everything we’ve built up over the past three weeks.

  No, not this time. Go to him. Don’t let some crook and the devil inside ruin your progress.

  The voice inside me is different than anything I’ve ever heard before, and I stop, listening to it.

  If you go to The Club, you’re going to end up dead.

  I stumble up the stairs, desperate to see Rafe’s face. To feel his touch.

  I get the door open, and he’s there, looking up in concern as I stagger into the lab, tears rolling down my face. He’s out
of his chair in an instant, coming over and taking me in his arms, holding me tightly. Exactly what I needed.

  “Shawnie, what’s wrong?” Rafe asks, and I look into his eyes, so blue they sear my very soul with their inner fire. All of my fears, all the threats that Mr. Robinson made . . . they’re gone as I tell him about the phone call.

  “It’s okay, Angel,” he says. “I probably made things worse because I didn’t tell you about what happened this morning. I thought that since you had a test, it would be better to focus on that. I was wrong.”

  “What happened?” I ask, listening as Rafe tells me about his meeting with the Dean. “You mean you could lose your job?”

  “I could,” he agrees. “But it doesn’t matter. All that matters to me is that you are safe. I knew that bowing down to these assholes wouldn’t do that, so I told them to stick it. Let them fire me. I’ve found something better, something that scares me and sets my soul on fire at the same time.”

  “What?” I ask, swallowing, and he takes my hands and looks into my eyes. “No, Master . . .”

  “Yes, Shawnie. I’ve fallen in love with you, and for that love, the first time I’ve truly loved anyone in my life, I’m willing to risk everything.”

  “Why?” I ask. “I mean, first . . . I love you too. But . . . why me?”

  “The same reason you scare me. Because being with you has been . . . perfect. But at the same time, that perfection worries me,” Rafe says, cupping my cheek. “You know, I was going to take you to bed right around Spring Break, show you how strong you are, and then let you outgrow me or 'break my heart,' moving on as respectful colleagues, not what we have become. I never expected to fall in love with you.”

  “Is that a good thing though?” I ask, slightly confused.

  “Of course it is, but what's left me shaking with night sweats is . . . what if part of the way I feel for you is because of the Program?”

  I think about it for a moment, then shake my head, trusting in what I’ve got to say, strength flowing into me with every word. “It doesn’t matter. Whether it's the Program, God, fate, or just the fact that you like my boobs, you feel the way you feel. And I love you. That's not some side effect of my own trauma or because you're a teacher and in a position of authority over me. What matters is that I love you and you love me, right?”

  He nods, taking my hands. “I do. I have no doubt.”

  “Then the reasons behind it don't mean nothin', as we would say back home,” I finish, my smile fading. “But what about Mr. Robinson and the threats he’s made?”

  “We’ll take care of those. But first, I have something else I need to take care of.”

  “What?” I ask, and Rafe kisses me, pulling me to him and caressing my back.

  “You . . . show me your desire,” he says softly. “Show me the angel. Show me your power and strength.”

  He pulls my body against his, letting my hunger and desire take away all of my inhibitions. Standing on my tiptoes, I can just reach his chin with my lips, so I kiss him there, trailing kisses down the sides of his neck. He initially resists me. He’s become accustomed to being in charge, but I desperately want to feel him. I pull his shirt back and over his shoulders, tossing it to the side. He pulls at my shirt and bra, stripping me quickly and leaving us both naked from the waist up, our eyes burning with something different than anything we’ve done before, more intense than even the strongest kink we’ve tried.

  “Like what you see?” Master asks, and I have to grin at his confidence and the feeling that he’s giving me. He’s intentionally letting himself be a little vulnerable, reassuring me even with his feigned weakness. Stepping back, I growl lightly, running my hands over my breasts, making sure to rub my nipples and tease him as much as I can.

  "Don't make me get on my knees and beg," I threaten, lightly pinching my right nipple. "Because if I do, I'm going to pull your cock out of your pants and suck you until you come in my mouth, and I don't want that. Not this time."

  "What do you want?" Master asks, his voice slightly husky. His eyes follow my hands as I run them down my stomach and over my hips, slipping my right hand inside my shorts to lightly tease my pussy. I sigh and look at him, my heart filled with desire and lust.

  "I want you inside me. I want all of you,” I sigh, stepping back until my butt bumps against the edge of the big conference table in the middle of the room and I sit down. I spread my legs, feeling my juices already start to soak my shorts.

  Rafe springs forward, kissing me powerfully and pulling my head into his, just a hint of his power even as he caresses and comforts me. I kiss him back, working the button on his jeans and opening them, pushing them off his hips to squeeze his ass through his underpants.

  “Mmm . . . you’re not obeying the rules,” Master teases, stepping backward. “I’ll let it slide just this once. Don’t tell me you want to tie me up now?”

  “The only thing I want is that piece of perfection you have there,” I tease back, reaching out with my right foot. The soft cotton of his shorts lets my foot slide over his bulging cock like it was covered in oil. "But please, Master . . . tell me."

  "Tell you?" he asks, a small smile on his face. He knows what I want. “How much you drive me wild?"

  “It’s a start," I coo, sliding my foot over his cock again. I hook my big toe into the waistband and start to pull down, but he’s just so big the elastic gets stuck. After a few seconds, he gives me a little help, his cock springing free. "But as much as I love that, it’s not what I want to hear."

  He laughs, pushing my legs apart and stepping up to the desk until he’s nearly pressed against me, his hands pulling me up to look him in the eyes. "Maybe," he whispers as his hand cups my left breast and drives the breath out of me when his thumb brushes my nipple. “Maybe what you want to hear is that if you give me the chance, I'm going to spoil you and give you every little fantasy you've ever imagined, every little gift your heart desires, even as you wear my collar and call me Master."

  “I love the sound of that too,” I reply, pulling him in and kissing him. Our tongues meet, and we slowly kiss for what seems like hours. Rafe runs his hand down my body to slide my soaked shorts off, leaving both of us naked in the chilly lab air. I wrap my hand around the hard shaft of his cock, pumping him slowly while his thumb rubs me. "But that's not what I want to hear."

  Rafe pushes my legs up, my hips sliding down until I’m in position and he’s in between, forcing me to let him go and to hold the backs of my knees. Taking his cock in his hand, he traces the thick head up and down my wet slit, teasing me with his eyes and with his cock. "I know what you want me to say. I want the same thing," he says honestly, his eyes deep with emotion. "I love you, Shawnie Holliday."

  When he says my name, he pushes inside me, filling me with one stroke. Reaching down, he takes my hand in his, entwining out fingers and bonding us together with more than just our hips. "I love you, Angel, and I always will."

  The position we’re in gives both of us shared control, Rafe with speed, and I can control depth. I want him deep inside me though, so it’s easy as I wrap my legs around his hips and shift until the curve of my ass hangs over the edge of the table, giving him full depth. He strokes slowly, showering me in the luxurious feeling of his cock slowly sliding in and out, each perfect inch different from the last it seems, and each wonderful. Rafe holds my hands tightly, and for the first time in the close to a year we’ve known each other, I see something in his eyes, something in his face. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing, it’s just that for the first time in my life, I feel like a man and not a monster,” he replies. “I guess love is a miracle.”

  Rafe brings his hands up to cup my breasts, pinching and rolling the nipples between his fingers, and I throw my head back, crying out at the pleasure. His hips speed up, faster and faster until I feel him taking me with powerful, deep strokes that set my body on fire, his cock filling me over and over. My clit rubs against the hard base of his cock with every
thrust, and stars shoot across my vision as my heart sings, and inside, I can feel the side of me known as Angel burst forth, forever ridding me of what I like to call the demon inside me. I hear a voice telling me it’s okay, that I’m safe and whole now.

  I realize now what it all is. There’s just me, and I’ve been at war with myself. But what I need isn’t to fight the monster, but to become the monster, to become what Master wants me to be. Tears pour down my cheeks as Rafe keeps stroking in and out, his hands strong and supportive, making me the woman that I can be. I scream in triumph and happiness, opening my eyes to see Rafe looking at me still. “Master . . . I love you. Now fuck me!”

  He never hesitates, leaning down and sucking my nipple deep into his mouth and licking the sensitive tip with his tongue even as he pushes me deeper onto the table, crawling up with me so that he can pound me with all of his strength and desire. I can’t hold out much longer, so I pour my heart out as he unleashes himself on me, my fingers digging into his shoulders.

  "I love you," I gasp as he plunges his cock deep into me. Each time his cock drives into me, I repeat myself, amazed that it can feel this good. I realize it’s because it’s making love.

  Finally, I can take no more. Pushing up into him as hard as I can, I impale myself on Rafe’s cock, burying my face in his shoulder and screaming as a deep, hard orgasm grips me. He holds me tight, letting my body tense and quiver until I start to relax. When I can breathe again, Rafe holds my hips tightly and lifts his, his legs giving him just enough space on the table as he seeks his own release. In only four more strokes, he groans into my neck, his cock shooting deep inside my body until I can feel the come dripping out of me. He sags against me, utterly spent.