The Deadbeat Next Door

by Katharine Sadler

  “We did,” Carrie said. She was smiling at George like she’d forgotten all about her fiancé next to her. “You always could make me laugh harder than anyone else.”

  “So hard you nearly peed your pants that time on the Ferris wheel at the carnival.”

  Carrie barked out a shout of laughter. “The kids below us would have had an unpleasant surprise.”

  Everyone laughed and I joined in, though I absolutely didn’t like this walk down memory lane.

  “I would cook for her every night,” I said, trying to get the conversation back on the right track.

  “What are you going on about, boy?” Bart asked, narrowing his eyes at me like he was angry. I wondered if I’d ever had any shot at his land or if this whole dinner had been his way of getting Carrie and his grandson back in the same room to remember how much they’d cared for each other.

  “You asked me for details,” I said. “I’d cook dinner for Carrie every night, and I’d rub her feet after a long day. I’d hold her when she cried because she was worried about one of her students, and I’d take her out on a date at least once a week. I’d always tell her she looked beautiful, and I’d make sure she never forgot that I’m in her corner, that I’m her partner, and will be there for any problem she might have.”

  I’d been talking to Bart, but on the last words, I turned to Carrie to find her looking at me with a tender expression on her face and tears in her eyes. Whatever I’d just said had made her weepy in that way women think is wonderful. I placed a kiss to her forehead and hoped that someday she found a man to do all those things for her, because she deserved it. That and so much more.

  Mary Ellen cleared her throat. “Sorry to interrupt,” she said. “But sweet nothings and romance ruin my appetite. Anyone see the game last night?”

  Everyone started talking sports and then moved on to the unseasonably warm weather. Mary Ellen told a funny story about trying to find a “mountain” home for a young couple from Northern Virginia, and Bart told us about the weird creatures he’d seen in the woods not too far from his house. The meal passed quickly.

  When we’d finished eating, Bart asked everyone to give him a few moments alone with me. The others helped clear the table and headed to the other side of the large kitchen to wash the dishes and chat while they cleaned up. I watched Carrie cross the room, standing way too close to George in my opinion, and turned my attention to Bart.

  “Boy,” he said. “I can see you’re fond of our Carrie, but I’m not sure I believe this relationship of yours is real.” He held up a hand when I opened my mouth to argue. “Mind you, I’m not saying the two of you are lying, I’m just saying that I don’t see any kind of hope for this relationship to stand the test of time.”

  “I know we’re different, but I think it’s our differences that make us such a good couple. I’m strong where she’s weak and she’s strong where I’m weak.” I was just making stuff up at this point, as far as I could tell, Carrie didn’t have any weaknesses. “I have no intention of giving her up.”

  “Uh-huh. If it was up to me, I wouldn’t sell you the land until you two were officially married in a church, but my boys are pressuring me to get rid of this place and I understand weddings take time to plan. What I’m proposing is that you two stay together for a month, maybe move in together to give this marriage thing a real trial run, and I’ll sell you the property at that point.”

  My stomach dropped. “A month? By the end of the month, it’ll be too late to put in the grapes and I’ll be way behind—”

  He waved a hand. “Don’t try to hoodwink me, kid. I may not be a farmer, but even I know it’s already too late to get your grapes in. Even if you started today, you’d never have the land ready in time.” He shrugged. “If you don’t want to wait, buy someone else’s land. My offer is one month of happiness and love with Carrie, prove to me you’re in this for the long haul, and I’ll sell you the land.”

  Shit, there was no way Carrie was going to agree to a whole month of this lying and deceit, but I didn’t have any other choice. “Okay,” I said. “I’ll be back in a month.”

  Bart frowned. “I’ll expect to see you more frequently than that. Stop in once a week and give me progress updates.”

  “Sure.” I hated this. I hated being under his thumb, because he had something I desperately wanted and he knew it. It’s a position my father never would have gotten himself in and, if he had gotten himself in this position, he would have walked away. I wanted the land too badly and had too much riding on it to walk away. I’d invested too much time and energy into finding this property. I pushed my chair back and stood. I offered my hand and Bart shook it.

  The others had already moved out to the porch and I went out there to find Carrie and George, heads together, at the far end of the porch and Mary Ellen and Dwight sitting on the porch steps. “I guess you and your brother want to get back to the city,” I said. I sat on the porch steps next to Dwight, even though my instincts were roaring at me to get between Carrie and George. She didn’t belong to me, I had no right to get between her and a potential real boyfriend. My chest pinched tight at the thought. I pulled in a deep breath and focused on Dwight.

  “I sure do,” Dwight said. “But George is sticking around. He’s not a city boy at heart and he’s got an opportunity working at the university in the next county over.”

  “Really,” I said. “What’s he going to be doing there?”

  Dwight looked up at me with what can only be described as an evil grin. “He’s going to be an English professor.”

  I groaned. Perfect ex-boyfriend George was so clearly everything that Carrie wanted, I didn’t stand a chance against him.

  “Ready to go?” Carrie asked, stepping up next to me and sliding her hand into mine.

  “Yeah.” We thanked Mary Ellen for dinner, said goodbye to Dwight and George, and got in the car.

  “What did Bart have to say?” Carrie asked as soon as I was back on the main road. “Do you think he bought it?”

  “Nope. Do you have any real interest in George?”

  “What?”

  “Do you want to date George? Do you think you might have a future with him?”

  “What does that have to do with what Bart said?” she asked.

  “I’ll tell you what Bart said after you answer the question.”

  She was quiet for several long miles and I felt the property slipping through my fingers, because I wouldn’t force her to keep up this charade if she had a chance at her happily ever after. Finally, a block from our houses, she spoke. “I was really crazy about him, you know, and I think that’s what I’m feeling now. It’s just nostalgia. I want to go back to those simple, fun times, but…” She hesitated. I pulled into my driveway and told myself this was for the best. It was better she walked away now before she developed feelings for me. “But I don’t know him anymore and I just…Well, I don’t want to be mean, because I don’t know him well, but…he’s kind of a douche.”

  That stopped me and I twisted in my seat to look at her. “You think he’s a douche? But you laughed at everything he said. You seemed totally smitten with him.”

  “Smitten? Who are you and what have you done with my rude, abrasive neighbor?”

  I laughed. “Apparently, he’s switched bodies with his sexy schoolteacher neighbor. Please tell me all the ways you think George is a douche.”

  “Um, well he hit on me three separate times with you either right there or in the next room. What kind of guy hits on another man’s fiancée?”

  I shrugged. “A man who thinks you’re only pretending to be engaged?”

  “Which he tried to get me to admit several times. I don’t like games and I don’t like subterfuge…Current predicament notwithstanding. Either he believes we’re engaged and hit on me anyway, or he was trying to get me to admit we were only pretending so he could run back to his granddad and tattle. Either way, he’s kind of a douche. Not to mention that his jokes were a lot funnier when I was sev
enteen.”

  “His bad jokes are my good fortune,” I said. “Come inside and I’ll tell you what Bart said.”

  She looked over her shoulder at Betty’s house. Betty wasn’t outside on the porch, since it was after eight, but she was likely peeking through the blinds. “Yeah, I’ll come in for a bit.”

  I led her inside and sat on the couch next to her. I was careful not to touch her now that we were alone. That just felt like asking for trouble. “Bart will sell me the property in one month, assuming you and I haven’t broken up before then.”

  “One month?” Her eyes widened. “As in four weeks?”

  I was confused, but I figured she was in shock, so I didn’t roll my eyes or ask if she’d hit her head. “Yes. Thirty-one days. He also suggested we live together.”

  She nodded, her expression thoughtful. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

  I stared at her. “The month deadline shocks you, but you’re okay with living together?”

  “Well, I’m not okay with it,” she said. “But it makes sense. If I was engaged to someone, I’d be at his place or he’d be at mine every night. Don’t you think?”

  “I’ve never had a relationship longer than a week, so I’m probably not the best judge.”

  She shook her head and bit down on a smile. “I also think we should have sex.”

  I tried to take in the words she’d just said, but I felt a bit like I’d been kicked in the nuts. “No, no, no. That’s a really, really bad idea. If we have sex, you’ll get attached and then the break-up will become a real break-up and you’ll cry and I’ll have to punch myself and shit will get ugly.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Why do men think they have the magic cock that will make women fall in love with them?”

  She said a whole bunch of stuff after that, but I was stuck on the word cock rolling from between her perfect, cupid’s bow lips. I had no idea she had such a filthy mouth and of course my cock was magic, that was why women…Holy shit, I didn’t exactly have women lining up begging me for more after they’d experienced my cock, with the tragic exception of Rachel Goldsmith. I’d always thought it was because I told them how it was going to be and they accepted that, but what if the problem was I was terrible in bed?

  Carrie snapped her fingers in front of my face. “Have you heard a word I just said?”

  “Not really.”

  She huffed. “My body is attracted to a complete and utter moron.”

  “Hey. That moron is sitting right here.”

  She shrugged. “I’m honestly not that concerned about your feelings, Cody. Here’s the deal, I’m attracted to you and you’re attracted to me. I’ve had the longest dry spell known to man and I would really love for it to end. There’s no danger of either of us falling in love with the other so why don’t we just do it and get it out of our system. Then the sexual tension will dissipate, we’ll realize just how incompatible we really are for one another and we can treat this like the business arrangement it is.”

  “You’re okay with the month deadline?”

  “As long as you agree to be my sex slave? Yes, I am.”

  I couldn’t match this brazen, open Carrie with the Carrie I’d known who didn’t talk about sex to me, ever. “Are you high right now?”

  She scooted closer to me and put a hand on my thigh. “Nope. Just sick of all the games and bullshit. I’ve tried dating the right way, I’ve looked for the right guy, and I’ve followed all the rules. Clearly, having fun and reliving my twenties is a bad idea in public, but in private…”

  I was having a really, really hard time focusing on anything but her lips and where I’d most like to feel them first. I wrapped my hand around the nape of her neck, but my conscience stopped me. “One more thing.”

  “Yeah,” she said, her voice breathy, her eyes on my lips.

  “We’re going out of town this weekend. My mother wants to meet you.”

  She pulled back and glared at me. “You want me to lie to your mother?”

  “No. She knows we’re pretending.”

  “Then why would she possibly want to meet me?”

  “Because she’s a meddlesome mother. She’s going to tell Bart the truth if we don’t visit.”

  “I guess we don’t have any choice.” She leaned in closer, her lips a breath away from mine.

  “Are you sure about this?”

  “Hell, yes.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  Carrie

  Cody’s mouth crashed onto mine and the last bit of reason and sanity I’d been holding onto fled. I’d done such a good job ignoring my lust for Cody, but then George had reminded me of all the jerks and losers I’d dated and I just wanted…I wanted a fun fling before I died alone an old spinster with fifteen dogs. I was allergic to cats, so I couldn’t even get spinsterhood right.

  I pulled at his shirt and slid my hands under it. I explored his hard, warm muscles. They felt really, really good. I was slowly beginning to think maybe I’d been wrong in writing off overly-muscled men. I pushed his shirt up and dropped my mouth to his chest, exploring the valleys and ridges of his pecs as I went. He moaned and the knowledge that I’d been the reason he’d made that sexy sound set me on fire. I’d only ever been with two men and it was so long ago I’d almost forgotten what it was like. Even so I was pretty sure it hadn’t been like this. My every nerve ending was alive and electric and I couldn’t get enough of him.

  I flicked my tongue over his nipple and then sucked it into my mouth. “Holy fuck,” he said, his body vibrating.

  He wrapped his big arms around me and lifted me with him as he stood. “I’m stating for the record that this is a mistake,” he said.

  “I like you better when you don’t talk.” For once in my life I was going to make the wrong choice, and I was going to enjoy the hell out of it.

  He chuckled and carried me down the hall to his room. He set me down on the bed and took two steps back. His expression shuttered and he put his hands behind his back, as though he was trying to remember not to touch me. “We shouldn’t do this.” He took another step back. “This is only going to complicate everything. We should stick to the plan and keep this platonic and business-like.”

  Damn it. He was supposed to be a party boy, a good-time guy, he wasn’t supposed to worry about my feelings. He wasn’t supposed to be the sensible one. I just wanted to enjoy him. I just wanted…I told myself I wanted to feed my lust, stoked by an eternal dry spell, but the truth was, I was lonely.

  With Cody, I could pretend, just for a bit, that he was my everything. I could push my loneliness away and know my heart would be safe at the end of it. I wouldn’t get the real thing with him, but I wanted a taste, I just wanted to pretend for a little while that I wasn’t alone, that I had someone in my bed and at my back. I just wanted to pretend…“What if it’s not a bad idea?” I said. This was either the craziest idea I’d ever had, or the best one. “What if you aren’t my neighbor? What if I’m a vineyard owner and you’re the guy who…I don’t know, does whatever job on a vineyard requires sweat and muscles and shirt-less work?”

  His brow twisted in confusion and he shook his head. “What are you talking about?”

  I had no earthly idea, but I liked it. I was a mental person, I used my imagination with every book I read, and this fantasy I was painting…Well, it was kind of fun. “I’ve been watching you work in the fields and I’ve been…” I felt my cheeks heat, but I pushed on. If I gave up now, he’d walk away and probably never give me another chance to convince him we should consummate our attraction. “I’ve been dreaming about you, naked and touching me, kissing me. I’ve wanted you, but you haven’t even looked at me. Not once.”

  “Carrie,” Cody said, but he took a step forward and I could see the desire on his face. “This is a mistake.”

  “You’re right. This would be a mistake, if Carrie the school teacher and Cody her neighbor had sex, but it’s not a mistake for Carrie the vineyard owner and Cody the hot, sweaty worker to have sex, because th
ey aren’t real.” I could see the doubt on his face. I could see him resisting. “We’ll pretend we’re other people, remove ourselves from this room by another step and be sure no one gets hurt.” He still doubted, I could see him mentally backing up and I wanted…I wanted…For once, I wanted to take what I wanted without guilt or shame or hesitation. “Please, Cody. I just…Just let me have this. It’s been so long since I—”

  “I want a raise,” he said, his voice gruff and firm and…Yes, there was still hesitation on his face, but his eyes were alight with something like excitement.

  “What?”

  “I’m working in your vineyards from sun-up to sun-down. I’ve saved your grapes and your winery with my knowledge and fast-thinking and I want a raise.”

  Oh…Oh. I smiled at him, slipping into the fantasy, taking on the role of a woman in charge, a woman who sees what she wants and is willing to take it, regardless of ethics or morals or…Okay, if she was a real person, she wouldn’t be very nice, but she wasn’t real and this was…This was fun. I looked Cody up and down like he was an object. The way he straightened and his eyes darkened let me know I was having an effect on him. I liked having an effect on him, I liked this game. “I wasn’t planning to give out any raises this year and, quite honestly, I’ve noticed you slacking and taking more time off than you should. I’m not sure you’ve earned a raise.”

  Cody took those two steps back to me and his eyes blazed with heat and desire. I suspected if I looked down, I’d see a more certain sign of his interest, but I was playing a game and Carrie, the vineyard owner, wasn’t going to look. “Do you have any suggestions for how I could earn that raise?”

  I looked over his shoulder at the open door. “I’ll have to think about it. It’s not something that can be discussed in a public place.”