Husband: Some Assembly Required

by Marie Ferrarella

  She was magnificent in her anger, he thought. “Ooh, you’re getting me excited again.” Taking hold of her waist, he slipped her onto his body so that she straddled it.

  The position might have been unconventional, but that didn’t stop her. She leaned forward and took a fistful of his hair as if she meant to pull it out. Her face was inches from his. “Talk.”

  He’d never had a threat so enticingly delivered. Murphy raised his head slightly and kissed her, then fell back. “It was nothing. It’s gone now.”

  She wasn’t about to let him off the hook that easily. She squeezed her thighs against him and smiled in triumph as she felt him respond. “But?”

  The woman just didn’t give up. That had its merits, but not now. He rested his hand lightly along her knee. “You make me dizzy.”

  She frowned as concern returned. She’d hoped, irrationally, that his dizziness would have gone by now. He was playing Russian roulette with his eyesight. “Murphy, that’s not me.”

  Murphy slowly ran his palms up along her thighs until they rested on her hips. Humor had returned to his eyes. “Feels like you.” It spread to his lips. “And I’ve become an expert in the past six hours on what you feel like.”

  The past six hours. Maybe it had been a mistake—a glorious mistake, but a mistake nonetheless. For more reasons than just one.

  She tried to slide back onto the bed, but he held her firmly in place. He wasn’t going to make this easy, she thought.

  “Murphy, there’s a breach of ethics here. I’m your doctor. I can’t be your—” Shawna couldn’t bring herself to say the word lover. It put a cheapened spin on what had happened last night. “Whatever I am right now.”

  Her embarrassment tickled him. He was used to brazen women, women who took to sex as naturally as they took to breathing, with as little thought behind it. It was refreshing. And just maybe, something he needed. Something that he had been avoiding because of his own fears.

  “The word ‘terrific’ comes to mind. Also ‘sensual.’ ‘Wonderful.’ ‘Hopelessly erotic.’” Leaning forward, he let his tongue tease the skin over her knee.

  Unable to stop herself, Shawna squirmed as pleasure rippled through her. “Murphy, stop. I can’t think when you do that.”

  He laughed softly, the sound rumbling through her body. “That’s the whole idea.”

  Suddenly taking hold of her waist, Murphy brought her down, switching places. In the blink of an eye he was the one on top. His body skimming hers, he held himself above her, just near enough to activate her yearning. Very carefully he circled her neck with small, pliant kisses.

  “One more for the road?” His lips were so close she could form the words with him.

  Shawna’s arms were tightening around his neck as if they had a will of their own. Heaven knew she didn’t have one anymore. He’d stolen it from her. “The road doesn’t need it.”

  He kissed one eyelid, and then another. “Maybe not, but I do.”

  Her body, she knew, was ready to receive him. Perhaps it would always be ready. He could play her like an instrument, making every fiber in her being hum and vibrate. She and Doug has hardly paid attention to this aspect of their marriage. Lovemaking was something that was nice, but never important.

  There was a whole world she didn’t know about.

  Her mouth curved as she moved beneath him, arousing him as quickly as he did her. “You weren’t kidding about stamina, were you?”

  It was Sunday. Neither of them needed to be anywhere for at least an hour. Perhaps two. He meant to get the most out of that time. “You bring out the best in me, Shawna.”

  His words were muffled against her skin. He kissed the side of her neck, networking his way along the slim column of her throat. He felt her begin to rock beneath him, making his blood run hot. He was in awe of what she did to him. And kept on doing.

  “The very best.”

  A sigh of contentment escaped as she attempted to voice a feeble protest. “But I have to go.” The words were all but swallowed up.

  “Later,” he murmured against her mouth, his hands doing wonderful things to her as they reclaimed what was already his from the first moment.

  “Later,” she breathed in agreement.

  Or perhaps she only thought about saying the word. It didn’t matter. She was falling completely under his spell.

  Again.

  * * *

  Shawna sat very still in Murphy’s car. Her hands were folded before her as she attempted to brazen out her sudden case of nerves. Second thoughts, belatedly, were multiplying within her rapidly. She had absolutely no idea how a woman behaved after a night, and a morning, of lovemaking with a man she had fantasized about.

  Fantasy, she thought vaguely, didn’t begin to cover it.

  But this wasn’t like her. This wasn’t who and what she was. She had behaved completely against type and the tinges of remorse she’d known were coming had arrived, baggage in hand.

  She stared straight ahead, afraid to look at him. Afraid to perhaps see amusement on his face at her expense. “Murphy, I don’t know what came over me.”

  He smiled to himself. There were times last night when she had demonstrated an enthusiasm that totally surprised him. It was as if there had been this font of emotion that had laid dormant until the right buttons were pushed. And he had pushed them. It made him feel almost humble. And infinitely glad to be alive.

  “Whatever it was, find out. I’d like to do this again.”

  The response was on her lips immediately. “No....”

  Instinctively he knew what she was thinking. That he wanted to bed her. He did, but that wasn’t the only thing at play here. There was more. Much more. It would have worried him had he let himself think it through.

  “Not just the lovemaking part, although I have to admit that I may have the bed sheets bronzed as a fond reminder of my finest hour.”

  “Hours,” she corrected automatically. He had made love to her all night. Time had stood still, and yet, it seemed to pour itself into hour after hour, until she thought she had always lain like this with him.

  “Yeah.” He drew the word out, grinning from ear to ear as he thought about it. “But it’s not just that,” he continued quickly. “I want all of it, Shawna. I want to be able to see you socially, without a tiny blue flashlight in your hand.”

  It took her a minute to realize what he was talking about. “That’s not a flashlight.” She laughed at his oversimplification. “That’s an ophthalmoscope.”

  He nodded carelessly. “One of them. I want to see you, with or without an ophthalmoscope,” he amended. “With or without your clothes.” He turned to look at her as he came to a stop before a red light. “I just want to see you, Shawna.” So much that it unnerved him. Maybe, if he saw her enough, this feeling would go away.

  And maybe, a small voice within him whispered, it wouldn’t.

  Run. Now. Before you get in too deep. Shawna took a deep breath, attempting to steel herself against everything. From the hurt she knew was waiting for her. From the emotions that had run rampant through her last night and this morning.

  That wanted to break loose now.

  She licked her lower lip, searching for a way to say this, for a way to explain. “Murphy, what happened before was an aberration.” She turned and looked at his profile as he stepped on the gas pedal again. She saw the line in his jaw grow rigid. “It’s too hard for me to go down this road.”

  He slowed down. It was still fairly early and there wasn’t that much traffic on the road. He was in no hurry to bring her home. To leave her. “I have no idea where this road is going to end.”

  “I do,” she replied stoically. “You just said it.” She could feel his eyes on her, but she didn’t turn her head. She could say this best if she wasn’t looking at him. “End. Things end.”

  He knew she was referring to the accident that had claimed her husband and child. “I’m immortal, didn’t you know?”

  She laughed and shoo
k her head. “That’s your problem. You think you are.” She could feel the pain building even as she spoke and she struggled to shut it away. The pain of losing someone she loved. “You go racing into burning buildings and taking on spaced-out toughs, thinking nothing will happen.”

  He knew it had to be the agitation talking. She couldn’t mean what she was saying. She couldn’t mean that she wanted him to just stand back and let things happen without raising a hand to stop them.

  “If I’d thought it out, a child would have died and you might have been killed.”

  Shawna raised her hand, shaking her head. Her thoughts were all tangled up in her head. None of this was coming out right.

  “I wasn’t speaking literally, exactly.” She took a breath and tried again. “You couldn’t have done anything differently than you did. That’s you. You saved the girl, you saved me and you were wonderful,” she said honestly. “What I meant was that you might think you’re invulnerable, but you’re not. No one is.” She bit her lip. When she looked at him, there were tears in her eyes. To love meant to lose. “And I don’t want to be left alone.”

  He wanted to pull over the car and just hold her. But that wouldn’t resolve what was being said here. So instead, he continued driving. “Let me get this straight. You don’t want me with you because you don’t want to be left alone.” He waited for a beat until his words sank in. “Is it just me, or is there something wrong here?”

  Her smile was sad. But it was there, and he counted its emergence as a triumph. A point for his side.

  “You make it sound ludicrous.”

  “That’s because it is,” he said gently. He grew more serious. “I don’t know what there is down the road for us, but I do know that I want to walk it with you. Not because we burned up sheets but because of what happened before that. And after.”

  “After?”

  He nodded. He could see the scene vividly and probably would for a long, long time. Shawna, standing barefoot in his kitchen, wearing only his shirt. He’d come in, toweling his hair dry from the shower and almost swept her back into the bedroom. “After. You making coffee for me, wearing my shift and nothing else.”

  Even the way he said it was arousing. She struggled to remember the point she was trying to make. “I was making coffee for me.”

  He wasn’t going to be put off. Murphy raised a brow in her direction. “Did I drink a cup?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then it was for me.” He rested his case. “Leave me a few illusions.” He took a left turn, passing an old Packard in mint condition. The driver was proudly taking it for its weekly run, he guessed. “Don’t fight too hard, Shawna. You might not win.”

  She watched, fascinated, as a dimple formed in his cheek. It took all she had not to reach out and touch it. What was he doing to her? She knew she didn’t want this, knew that if she opened herself up to feel something for him she’d live to regret it.

  “Even if I win—” she said the words more to herself than to him “—I might not win.”

  He toyed with the logic behind that. “You sure you don’t want to be a lawyer?”

  She laughed as she shook her head, then sighed. “You make me laugh, Murphy.”

  “Not all the time,” he reminded her with a smile that brought last night back vividly. He gestured toward the right. “Well, here we are. Want me to come in with you?”

  She looked up in surprise. She had been so wound up in the discussion she hadn’t realized that they had reached her apartment complex.

  Shawna squared her shoulders. This was going to be a challenge. “I’d rather face my mother alone.”

  “Think she was worried? You are over twenty-one.”

  “Worried?” Shawna laughed as she repeated the word. Murphy looked at her, waiting for the punch line. “She probably has party streamers out, celebrating the fact that her daughter finally stayed out all night.” Shawna looked toward her apartment door with a shake of her head. She knew she wasn’t exaggerating by much.

  He wasn’t quite following her. “You must have done it before—”

  “No.” She believed in being honest, even though she knew what it must make her sound like. Like a prude. Or worse, someone no one else wanted.

  He found that difficult to believe. “Never?”

  “Never.” She was in this deep, she might as well go all the way. “As corny as it sounds, I was a virgin when I got married.” She looked down at her hands, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “Doug wasn’t exactly the kind of man who wanted to get me into bed. He was more into research.”

  Sex and the physical side of marriage had never been a high priority with Doug. But he had been loving in his own fashion. And he had made her feel safe.

  Murphy listened and wondered what sort of a man she had been married to. How could anyone be married to someone like Shawna and then turn toward his work? Her late husband must have been a hell of a dedicated man.

  “There’s research and then there’s research.” He turned off his engine. The topic fascinated him. Murphy scrutinized her as he folded his arms before him. “How about after?”

  She merely shook her head.

  Now, that he really found hard to believe. After Janice left him he’d forced himself to get back into the swim of things. Quickly. “You mean I’m the only other man that you ever—?”

  “Yes.” The word came out in a rush. She raised her eyes to his. “If you have the audacity to gloat, I swear that I won’t be responsible for—”

  “Gloat?” he echoed. “Why the hell would I gloat?” His mouth softened as he looked at her. Did she think that little of herself? Or him? “That’s the nicest present anyone ever gave me.” He nodded toward the front door. “Sure you don’t want some moral support?”

  The last thing she wanted was to bring him in with her. Her mother would pounce immediately. “I’m sure. I can do this alone.”

  He accepted her decision and started the car again. “Just don’t get back into the habit of doing everything alone,” he warned. She’d already opened the door on her side when he leaned over and kissed her. “I’ll call you.”

  Shawna nodded and then got out. She knew that she would be better off if he didn’t call. And wretched, too.

  She walked slowly to her door, not relishing the scene that lay ahead. She knew her mother was going to attempt to pump her for details. What her mother needed, she thought, was a nice, stable relationship with a nice, stable man. That was what she had needed all along. Too bad she didn’t know anyone for her.

  Turning at the last moment, Shawna saw that Murphy was still sitting in his idling car. He waved and then pulled away.

  Bracing herself, Shawna unlocked her front door. The sound of voices floated to her immediately. They were coming from the living room.

  Oh, God, she’s called the police, Shawna thought.

  The next moment she discarded the thought. Her mother wasn’t the type to panic that way. If she called the police, it was to buy tickets to the policeman’s ball. And perhaps to snare the policeman while she was at it.

  Then she was in the living room, looking at the distinguished-looking older man sitting on her sofa. He was nursing a cup of coffee and laughing. Her mother gave the impression of fluttering around him even as she sat beside him, laughing into his blue eyes.

  Shawna could only stare. “Dr. McGuire, what are you doing here?”

  He’d been so caught up in the conversation and the charming woman beside him that he was surprised to hear his name called. McGuire looked up and stared, amazed.

  “Dr. Saunders?” She was wearing what, in his day, was described as a becoming frock. He smiled broadly. “I didn’t recognize you without your lab coat.” He rose slightly in his seat until she waved him back down. McGuire settled his coffee cup and saucer on the table before him. “I must say, you really look lovely.” His eyes skimmed toward Sally. “Having now met your mother, I can see where you get it from.”

  Her mother was absorbing this
like a vacuum cleaner with its suction set on high. She always came alive at compliments, Shawna thought.

  Sally rose and crossed to Shawna. The smile on her face was sheer contentment. Shawna was surprised that she even acknowledged her. Being around a man tended to block most of her mother’s thought processes.

  Sally took her daughter’s hand. “Did you have a nice time, dear?” There was what amounted to a secret smile on her mother’s face that told Shawna the woman couldn’t have been happier that she had waltzed in at this hour, still wearing the clothes she had had on the night before.

  Her mother was one of a kind, Shawna thought.

  “Yes.” Shawna was more interested in what the doctor was doing here than what her mother thought. “Is there something wrong at the clinic?”

  He grew serious. He didn’t like having things kept from him. “Not exactly, but last night was my turn to be on duty.”

  “Yes, I know.” What was he getting at? Had there been another break-in? She hadn’t mentioned anything about what had happened at the clinic to anyone, hoping that it would all blow over. The less attention this received, the better. But if there’d been a break-in, then maybe she’d been wrong.

  He rose and crossed to her, a tall man with the air of a patriarch. “I just found out from one of my patients that two men tried to rob the clinic last week while you were there.” He sounded angry.

  “I—” She didn’t get very far.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” He felt responsible. What if something had happened to her? He’d been the one to recruit her in the first place. The anger he felt was directed toward himself, not her.

  “Nothing was stolen. I didn’t see the point in upsetting you.” She placed a comforting hand on the man’s arm. They were friends, as much as she had allowed anyone to be in the past year. If she didn’t think of Murphy. “Besides, Murphy was with me.” She smiled at his concern, touched. “We even got a neighborhood protector out of it. This huge man who calls himself Mount.”

  McGuire nodded. He had made a point of getting all the details once he’d found out about the incident. “Jeremiah Jones, yes, I know him. He has his own brand of law enforcement. The police usually give him a wide berth.” He frowned. McGuire knew what it was like to keep his own counsel. But he wasn’t an attractive young woman. The risks doubled. “Still, you should have come to me with this.”