Into the Darkness

by Margaret Daley

  “Some people would call you a fool to believe so blindly.”

  “We’ve made it this far. We’ll make it the rest of the way.”

  In the dim light of the half moon, no longer covered by clouds, Kate observed him touching the back of his head although she still couldn’t see his expression.

  “We’re going to make it, but I didn’t necessarily say in what kind of condition.” She forced a lightness into her voice, wanting not to consider the gravity of the situation for a little while.

  “You tell me this now when my head’s pounding and every part of me hurts.”

  “Well, look on the bright side. We’re nearly to the bottom of the hill, and it didn’t take long.”

  He laughed, a robust sound that competed with the other noises in the jungle. “For future reference, I think the more traditional way is better. Probably wouldn’t hurt as much.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.” She eased herself back against the rock face at the same time he settled next to her, their arms touching. “Have you climbed many hills?” she asked, hoping he would reveal a little more about himself. There were still a few hours to dawn, and she was still afraid to have him go to sleep. She was afraid to go to sleep herself. One false move and either one of them could continue the journey to the bottom of the hill—swiftly, dangerously.

  “A few. How about you? As I seem to recall, there aren’t that many hills in Oklahoma.”

  She smiled at the way he had turned the conversation around and focused it on her. She had learned more about him tonight than he had probably ever told anyone in a long time, except Renee. “There are a few. Oklahoma isn’t totally flat, at least not the eastern half of the state. How about where you’re from? Are there many hills?”

  “I think we’re stuck on one right now.”

  She gritted her teeth. He would have been the perfect spy. No one would have gotten a thing out of him unless he wanted them to know it. “I meant when you lived in the United States.”

  “I know what you meant. You’re bound and determined to have my life history.”

  She remained quiet.

  He sighed. “Okay. Here goes. It’s a short life history so it won’t eat up much time. I was born in Tennessee, not the mountain part, but Memphis. My father wasn’t around when I was growing up. My mother worked all the time to feed and clothe me and my sister. My childhood wasn’t anything I would want to write about. I went into the service so I could go to college on the government’s tab. I served my time, then went to the University of Arizona where I eventually got my doctorate in archaeology before moving to Texas. End of story.”

  Hardly the end of the story, Kate thought, rolling her head around on her shoulders. She knew the discussion of the relevant parts of his life was over. She would have to be satisfied with what she had discovered. “Very good. And the world as we know it did not come to an end with that revelation.”

  “Ouch. I think my sarcasm is rubbing off on you. Okay. It’s your turn. What’s your life story?”

  “Mine is even shorter than yours. I grew up in Red Creek and that is the only place I’ve lived. Zach is all the family I have left, except a grandfather. I am the secretary at my church. End of story.”

  “I doubt that. How old were you when your parents and sister died?”

  She’d hoped he hadn’t latched on to that bit of her story. His question produced buried emotions that rose into her throat and lumped together. She swallowed hard and tried to form an answer. No words would come to mind.

  “Kate?” Slader took her hands and cupped them between his, facing her.

  The gesture released the dam on her tears, and they flowed down her cheeks. She cleared her throat and squeaked out, “Seventeen.”

  His arm slid around her, and he pulled her close to him.

  Laying her head on his shoulder, she said in a stronger voice, “Tess was only fifteen and that afternoon we’d had a huge fight because she was taking my clothes and wearing them to school. She hadn’t bothered to return them, and I found several items in her room on her floor. There was a particular piece of clothing that I wanted to take on the church retreat Zach and I were going on for the weekend. I wanted to look extra nice for a boy I had a crush on. The shirt was dirty and wrinkled. I yelled at her, and she yelled at me.” Tears jammed Kate’s throat, locking in her words. She could still see in her mind’s eye the scene as if it had happened yesterday. Every line of her body had spoken her anger at Tess down to the balled hands at her sides.

  Slader squeezed her closer. “What happened?”

  His gentle tone urged her to release the torment she hadn’t expressed to another soul, not even her twin. “I stormed out of her room, telling Tess I wished I didn’t have a little sister. That night a fire consumed our house and my family. I no longer had a little sister.” Tears streamed down her face, and for the first time she truly cried for her loss. Guilt had stopped her for years—a guilt she had kept pushing out of her conscious mind because she hadn’t wanted to deal with it.

  “And you think God granted you your wish?”

  She nodded, then realized he might not see her action and said, “Yes—I mean, no. God isn’t like that, but at seventeen I thought that.”

  “That you were the reason your parents and sister died?”

  “Yes. Later I realized how much I needed the Lord’s love and forgiveness. He’s what has sustained me during the tough times.”

  He took her chin and brought her face around so he could look her in the eye, even though it was too dark to see much. “Believe me, you weren’t responsible.” He wiped away the tears that continued to fall.

  “There’s a part of me that realizes that, but I never got to ask Tess for her forgiveness. I never got to right what I said to her the last time I saw her. Do you understand now why it’s so important for me to find Zach? I can’t lose another sibling. Zach’s all I have.”

  He framed her face with his large hands. “Yes, but what if he isn’t alive? Are you prepared for that?”

  “He is alive.”

  His long sigh brushed against her lips right before his mouth settled on hers, his searing kiss a total shock. When he pulled back, Kate wanted to take his face between her hands and demand another kiss. His touch fell away, and he put some distance between them.

  “I shouldn’t have done that.”

  “Why did you?” Kate missed the feel of his mouth on hers, the comfort of his arms around her. For one brief moment the loneliness had been held at bay in his embrace.

  “It seemed the right thing to do at the time.” He adjusted himself against the rock face, his arms resting on his raised knees. “We need to discuss our next move.”

  “What next move?” Another kiss? Kate wondered, not at all appalled at the idea.

  “Should we go forward into the unknown or go back to Mandras?”

  “We can’t go back!”

  “Kate, we don’t have anything but the clothes we’re wearing. The jungle isn’t the lush environment everyone thinks it is. It’s hard to make it with nothing but our bare hands.”

  “You have a knife.”

  “That won’t cut down very much.”

  “What about the men after us?”

  “That’s a bit of a problem, but we can probably skirt around them. It’s just you and me and no supplies. Kate, I made a promise to myself long ago that I would not bury another woman out here in the jungle. I won’t break that promise to myself.”

  “And, being a woman, I am grateful for that promise, but I made a promise to myself. I will find Zach.”

  “So, this is a Mexican standoff?”

  “Not exactly. Going back could be more dangerous than going forward. You don’t know otherwise. But if I go back, I won’t find Zach. That’s a definite.”

  He laughed. “You’re one stubborn woman.”

  “Yes, sadly I am. I’m working on that. And my lack of patience.”

  “You’re gonna have to compromise on this. I�
��ll go forward for a few more days. If we don’t find your brother, then we’re going back to Mandras. Deal?”

  Kate chewed her bottom lip, still remembering Slader’s kiss.

  “Kate, deal?”

  “Okay. I guess I don’t have a choice in the matter.”

  “No, you don’t, because I will bring you back to Mandras over my shoulder if I have to.”

  The picture of Slader carrying her slung over his shoulder popped into her mind, and she chuckled. “That’s an awfully long trek, and I’m not what you would call slender.”

  “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

  The words were said in jest, but Kate heard the determination behind them and knew he would do exactly what he had threatened if she balked at going back to Mandras in a few days. Lord, I only have a short time to find Zach. Please point us in the right direction.

  “What about our backpacks? Do you think we might be able to find them?”

  “It’s possible they’re at the bottom of this hill. It’s also possible they are somewhere along the path we took down the hill.”

  “I think we should search for them.” Kate stared at the sky growing light with streaks of orange and yellow woven through the dark.

  “You’re right.”

  “I am? This is a first, you admitting I am right.”

  “Funny,” he said with a chuckle.

  She rubbed her arm. “Mud baths are highly overrated. I for one can’t wait to wash this mud off me.”

  “You’ll get your chance. Below we’ll have to swim across the river to get to the other side.”

  “Swim?”

  “You can, can’t you?”

  “Yes, but what about the piranhas?”

  “They aren’t as bad as they are made out to be. Usually they don’t attack people.”

  “Usually is the operative word here.”

  “You’ll be all right.”

  “Promise?”

  “Yes.”

  Somehow, she felt as though he would protect her against anything that might attack her in the water, so she refused to think any more about what might lurk there.

  “We’ll wait until it’s totally light then head out,” he said, stretching each leg as if testing them to make sure they worked after his spill down the hill.

  Then Slader turned his head and searched the area, his strong features highlighted by the gray shadows of dawn. Kate hugged her legs to her chest and rested her head on her knees, watching him. With lightning quickness, his attention returned to her before she had a chance to close her eyes. His gaze ensnared hers, and for a long moment she felt trapped by his look.

  The corner of his mouth slanted upward. “You should get a little rest. I promise not to go to sleep, so you won’t have to worry about me losing consciousness.”

  “I’m tired, but I can’t sleep now. Besides, it won’t be long before it’s fully light.”

  “True.”

  His gaze continued to drill into hers. “I look a mess.”

  He reached out and plucked a leaf from her wild mane. “I like your hair down.”

  The air between them electrified. She sat up, her tongue slipping across her dry, cracked lips. Staring at him, she wanted to tell him she liked everything about him, but she didn’t say a word. Even with his face scratched and two days’ growth of a beard, he looked wonderful to her eyes.

  “You shouldn’t wear your hair up.” He glanced away as though suddenly embarrassed and slowly rose on the small ledge, holding his hand out for her to take.

  She slid hers into his grasp, and he pulled her up to stand beside him. Below them, through the gray mist that shrouded the jungle, ran a river with a small waterfall no more than twenty-five feet upstream. A blanket of green covered the landscape for miles with little interruption except for an occasional tree that thrust itself high above the others around it. A colorful bird with yellow and green feathers flew close and landed on a branch not far from them. Its thrilling song filled the early morning air.

  Kate turned to say something to Slader at the same moment he turned toward her. There were only inches between them.

  He smoothed a stray strand of her hair behind her ear and cupped the back of her neck. “You’re not as plain looking as you want people to believe, Kate. Why do you hide behind unflattering clothes and a ‘do not approach’ attitude?”

  She straightened, shrugging away from his touch and trying to muster anger at his question. But she couldn’t. His question bored into her, demanding she take a good hard look at her life. The past night had stirred memories she hadn’t allowed herself to think about in a long while. “Because that is who I am,” she finally answered, no conviction behind her words.

  He brought his arms to his side, but sympathy was in his eyes. “Maybe you aren’t the only one serving penance for a past action.”

  She took a step back, careful not to go too far. “What do you mean?” There was more strength in her voice this time.

  “I mean your guilt over your sister’s death. You yelled at her for wearing a shirt you had wanted to wear to impress a guy. Now you go out of your way to dress in a way that is certain not to attract a guy.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with how I dress.”

  “So, you like the schoolmarm-in-mourning look?”

  She opened her mouth to deny his words but couldn’t. She snapped it closed.

  Slader stepped into her personal space. She thought about moving away but was trapped by the narrowness of the ledge. She brought her hands up to push him back. Capturing them, he held them against his chest. “In Red Creek, do you date?”

  “It’s none of your business.”

  “As you told me earlier, I’m making it my business. Do you date, Kate?”

  The intensity of his question battered her defenses. “No. I’m very busy and don’t have much time for dating.”

  “Doing what?”

  “Working.” She threw her shoulders back. “Volunteering. Reading. Gardening and…” She couldn’t think of anything else she really did with her time.

  “And doing a fine job of running away from life.”

  “I do not. I am quite involved in my church and I serve on several committees. I have a lot of friends.”

  “Any of them male?”

  The space between them shrunk even more. Her breathing became shallow, raspy. “Sure. There’s the reverend at our church and Mr. Benson next door.”

  “Any males between the ages of thirty and forty-five?”

  She thought for a moment, then slowly shook her head.

  “My point exactly. Ever since your sister’s death you have hidden yourself from the opposite sex. You think that will make up for what you wished that day you fought with Tess.”

  Anger took hold of her finally. “And from experience you know that it doesn’t work—hiding that is. Life has a way of finding you.”

  For one split second her anger ruled, then suddenly it melted away, leaving her clinging to him for support. His hand fisted in her thick, wild hair and held her still while his mouth claimed hers in a kiss not anything like the gentle, brief one a few hours before. This one went straight to her heart. Legs weak, she dug her fingernails into his shoulders while his mouth possessed hers.

  When he finally moved back, his dark, dark gaze pierced her. “We’d better get moving. We have a long way to go today, and we need to find at least one of our backpacks and maybe one of the machetes. I released mine when I knew I was going to tumble down the hill. What happened to yours?”

  “Mine released itself when I went tumbling down the hill. Everything happened so fast, I doubt I would have thought to untie it.”

  He gave her an odd look. “Someone’s watching out for you.”

  “God is.”

  “Perhaps you’re right.”

  “I know I am.”

  He turned away and stared down the hill, then up the way they had come. “I don’t see anything. Do you remember where you were when you los
t your backpack?”

  “I don’t remember much except branches clawing me and green whirling by.”

  He ran his hand through his hair. “Neither do I.”

  Kate eased herself to the ledge and looked over into the dense jungle below. Squinting as though that would make a difference, she scanned the area. Something blue caught her attention. A bird? Her backpack was blue. “Look. What do you think that is?”

  Slader peered at the place she pointed at. “That might be your backpack. There’s only one way to find out.”

  “Go down?”

  “Yes, we go down, preferably at a more controlled rate.”

  Half an hour later with her backpack, Kate stood at the edge of the river fifty yards down from the small waterfall, staring at the water that flowed by at a more sedate pace than she had imagined. She had to swim across. What choice did she have? Across the river was where Zach was. Her crash course in learning to swim before coming to the Amazon suddenly didn’t seem long enough for her to get herself to the other side.

  “Kate, what aren’t you telling me?” Slader moved in front of her, blocking her view of the river.

  “Until a few weeks ago I didn’t swim at all. When I decided I had to search for my brother myself, I took some lessons from a friend.”

  “You can’t swim?”

  “I can swim. I’m just not sure how good I am at it.”

  “Lady, that explains why you almost drowned a few days ago.”

  She bristled at his use of the word lady as though their time on the ledge had counted for nothing when in her heart she would never forget how close she had felt to him. “Mr. Slader, I will swim across that river, and I will do it without any help from you.” She lifted her chin and glared at him.

  His laughter echoed through the jungle. “I can always count on your stubborn streak, Kate. If it will make you feel any better, you shouldn’t have to swim much. This is the end of the dry season when the water is at its lowest even with the rain that has fallen in the past twenty-four hours.” He gestured at the river. “See all those sandbars. During the rainy season there aren’t any. Are you ready?”

  She nodded, gulping down the fear that threatened to surface as she stepped closer to the river. The water all of a sudden seemed to be rushing by her at a quick pace. The rumble of the waterfall masked the thundering heartbeat that had lodged in her throat.