We Thought We Were Invincible
Page 18
“You shouldn't.” I turned again to pour the coffee in a carafe. “Do you know where you're going to go?”
She grinned. “I'm starting in Prague. We'll see from there. Parker's coming with me, especially since dad agreed to finance it. He thinks we need to get away.” She took the carafe from me and started heading toward her table. “Anyway, have you decided what you're doing after graduation?”
“No. No, I haven't.” I took a step back. “Enjoy your coffee. I'll be over by the counter if you need me.”
I couldn't get away fast enough. It was the question on everyone's mind. What's next.
Morgan and her mom stayed for two cups of coffee, leaving some bills on the table, and waving as they left.
The silence of the empty diner left me with only my own thoughts for company, eating away at my sanity. Kat was cleaning in the kitchen, so I wiped down every surface out front. Twice.
I pulled the picture I always kept with me out of my purse, staring at the man who now had a face, but no name. E. Eric? Ethan? Elijah?
The bell chimed and I put it away quickly. Colby and Jamie walked in. Without a word, Jamie wrapped me in a hug.
“Mmm,” I said. “How do you always know what I need?”
“Oh, this is totally selfish. I just wanted your hot little body pressed up against me.”
I pushed away from him, slapping his chest with a laugh. “Jerk.”
“I was just kidding.” He chuckled. “Come here.” He pulled me back to him. “Wanna get out of here?”
I nodded against his chest, looking toward Colby who was putting on his apron.
“I'm here to relieve you,” he said. “Go.”
I couldn't untie my apron fast enough.
Jamie and I ended up back at his house. He slid past me into his room, giving me a kiss on the move. I followed him in, climbing onto his big bed and leaning back.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure,” he responded.
“We never talk about what's next.”
He leaned over, removing his guitar from its case. “I don't know what you mean.”
“Yes, you do. We've actually gotten quite good at it. Masterful even. I've known you most of my life. We've been together for months. Yet, I have no clue what you're doing after high school. You don't find that weird?”
“I don't know what you're doing.” He shrugged the strap over his shoulder, testing a few notes with his thumb.
“That's weird. We're weird.”
“We're perfect.” He flashed me a dimpled grin and started playing slow and steady, his fingers switching chords smoothly.
I knew what he was doing. When he started singing, it almost worked. His voice had a smooth quality that was hard to resist.
“I know what you're trying to do.” I crossed my arms, keeping my eyes trained on his face. Those lips as they formed the words to the song. Those cheeks that always reddened slightly when he was playing for me. Those eyes, deeper than the ocean.
“I don't know what you're talking about.” There was that grin again. The one that worked for every girl he unleashed it on.
I clamped my hand down over his on the strings, stopping the vibrations immediately. Leaning forward, I captured his lips, biting down to elicit a growl. He kissed me back just as hard, the guitar preventing it from going further.
I finally broke away. “Now that that's out of my system.” I flashed him a smile of my own, enjoying his speechlessness. “Talk to me, Jamie.”
He pulled the guitar strap off over his head and pushed it to the side. “I'm still deciding,” he said vaguely.
“Didn't most people already have to accept their college spots?”
“I'm weighing my options.”
I took what he said at face value because at the time, it never occurred to me that Jamie Daniels, son of a state senator, wouldn't go to college. And it definitely didn't occur to me that the place he would choose would be far away.
“What about you?” He nudged me. “You didn't apply to college, so what's next for Callie McCoy?”
“I honestly don't know.” I leaned into him. “And, Jamie, that scares the crap out of me.”
34
Jamie
We regret to inform you that you have not been selected to attend our university for fall semester.
“Regret,” I said, my voice growing louder. “Regret. Here's what I'll do with your regret!” My fist curled around the letter, crumpling it into a ball and flinging it with all my strength. It flew out my open bedroom door, striking the wall with little impact.
That was the last one. They all said the same thing. With a GPA that was barely enough to graduate, I didn't know what I was expecting. Maybe that my dad's status as a state senator would hold some sway on my future.
Great. Just my luck. My father's footsteps, slightly muffled by the carpeting, came down the hall. I couldn't look at him as he stopped to pick up the ball of paper.
“Throwing things?” he asked, reaching to hand it back. Before I could take it from him, he thought better of it and started to flatten it out. “Hmmph.” His only response. I braced for his reaction, but he only released the letter, letting it float to the ground, and left without another word.
I had to get out of there. My fingers grazed the phone in my pocket, itching to call Callie, but all it'd do was prove that I wasn't good enough. Not for my father. Not for her.
Grabbing the shirt hanging on the back of my desk chair, I slid it over my head and swiped my keys off their hook. I was in my car and heading down the road in record time. Rolling my window down, I felt the warm spring air blast my face and pressed down harder on the gas pedal. Weaving in and out of cars, I knew where I was heading.
Dixon road was lined by preserve on one side and horse ranches on the other. It was deserted save for the odd car. I sped up, adrenaline pumping through my veins. The car slid toward the center of the road when I took a curve too fast, but I veered back over quickly.
Graduation was only a month away. I amped up the speed. I had no idea what was next. I cranked up the stereo. Everyone I knew was going off to college or travel. A scream ripped through my chest.
Not everyone, I suddenly remembered, easing up on the gas. Callie had been trying to talk about this for months. She was just as scared as me. I slowed some more, breathing deeply with the need to see her.
The road curved as a cross street came in on the left next to an old, run down barn. I tried to turn, but the car had other ideas.
I should have been frightened. I should have screamed.
Instead, I closed my eyes, stomping my foot down as hard as I could on the brake.
The car screeched. She protested, fought me with everything she had.
I slammed forward, my face bouncing off the steering wheel with a mighty crack. My eyes sprung open as I was jostled, the wheels bouncing along the rough terrain. Then it was over. I won. The car stopped five feet away from a large Florida pine that seemed to spring up from nowhere.
Breath returned to my chest with a whoosh as I panted and gasped, feeling at once relieved and exhilarated. I wiped an arm under my nose, my sleeve coming away bloody.
“Damn.” The word left me with a laugh. “That was close.”
My mind worked a mile a minute, slowly letting reality creep back in. My reasons for being out here, for needing the speed. Dad. College.
Needing something to do, I rummaged around, finding a napkin. Tearing it in two, I stuck an end up each nostril to staunch the bleeding. I turned the keys, only eliciting a loud coughing sound. “Dammit.”
Stepping out of the car, I was careful not to touch the burning hood. It smoked slightly. Looking around, I was glad to see I hadn't gone too far off the road.
Just as I started to get my bearings, a pair of headlights moved closer, all but blinding me in the process.
“You okay?” A man's voice yelled. He cut the lights and I saw him get out of his truck. He was solidly built, walking with the con
fidence of someone in authority.
“I think so,” I finally answered.
The man looked back toward his truck and it was the first time I noticed he wasn't alone. A girl sat in the passenger seat, but I couldn't make out her face.
“You need a ride somewhere?” he asked.
“Uh …” I looked at him skeptically, holding out my phone. “I can call my buddy.”
“Oh.” The man laughed suddenly. “Guess I should introduce myself. Logan Andrews.” He held his hand out for me to shake.
I took it, but still didn't get it.
“You know my sister Amelia.” He gestured up to the truck.
I swallowed hard, narrowing my eyes.
“We saw you veer off the road,” he explained. “She thought we should help.”
“What? Help you hide my body?”
“Come on.” Logan clapped me on the shoulder. “I have a buddy who can come tow your car.”
He made it nearly impossible to refuse his offer and before I knew it, I was in the backseat of Logan's truck. Amelia turned in her seat to look at me.
“Jamie Daniels, you sir are an idiot.”
I jerked my head up to look at her and she continued.
“We saw how fast you were going. Dixon road is no joke.”
I leaned back, crossing my arms and looking away. “Give it a rest, Amelia.”
“No,” she stated. “We just helped your ass, so I have a right to say a few things to you.”
“And I have a right not to listen.”
“You're infuriating.” She turned to her brother. “Let's go to Jessie's.”
“Take me home.”
“No.” We stared at each other for a long moment before I couldn't take it anymore.
Jessie's was a coffee shop nearby. It was fairly quiet when we got there. Amelia ordered me to a booth in the back and I had no choice so I obeyed. She sat across from me with Logan beside her.
After ordering our drinks, she fixed me with a stare that didn't seem much like the girl I'd known. Had we really known each other at all?
“Tell me,” she said simply.
And I did. I didn't mention my dad other than his disappointment in me, but I found myself telling them about the colleges I'd applied to and been rejected. It felt good to talk to people who had no expectations of me, no hopes. Amelia was easy to talk to, and I suddenly found myself wondering why we'd never done much of it back when we were together.
Callie. That was why. I never put much effort into my relationship with Amelia because she wasn't the one I'd wanted to be with.
“Why do you want to go to college?” she asked once I was finished.
That was something I'd been asking myself since I'd applied. To make my family proud? To have some direction? Was it enough?
I shrugged, occupying myself by taking a long sip of coffee.
“Have you thought about doing something else?” Logan spoke for the first time since we'd sat down.
Again, I shrugged.
“I'm technically going to college,” Amelia started. “But not your typical school. Air Force Academy all the way.”
“Wait, really?” I looked at her in shock.
“Shows how much you paid attention.” Her words held a hint of scorn. “I've been working toward it for years.”
“Yeah,” Logan jumped in. “Because she's a traitor.”
“Y'all just need to get over it,” she responded with a laugh before turning to explain to me. “We're an army family. Three uncles, two cousins, and this big lug here.”
“I'm home on leave, but I head back to base in a few days.”
A sudden interest struck me and I found myself leaning forward. “Are you glad you joined up?”
Logan's face brightened. “Best damn decision I ever made. Before, I didn't know anything. I was always getting in trouble. There's something about fighting for something bigger than ourselves that lets us figure out who we really are. It changed my life. Let me prove to people that I was more than the person I'd been.”
His words cemented themselves in my brain and I knew without a doubt that they weren't ones I'd forget any time soon.
35
Callie
What did I like to do? What was I good at? Those were the questions the visiting speaker had for us in Creative Writing. Mr. Chase brought in a woman who was supposed to help us figure out what we might want to do in life.
Surfing. That's the only thing I came up with and she looked at me like I was a little nuts. Yes, I knew I wasn't going to surf for a career. I wasn't good enough to be a professional.
I liked to write - something I'd found out first semester and kept doing when I had the time. I was even kind of good at it. Once again - not exactly a legit career choice. She'd asked if I knew how many writers never made it.
Plus, there was the whole college thing to consider. I wasn't going.
After that, I came up blank.
Beside me, Morgan was chattering away about all the things she could see herself doing.
I stuck my hand in my backpack, running my fingertips over the now familiar picture. That was what I wanted.
The last month of senior year was a little pointless. There were no exams to prepare for. No homework to be done. Our senior projects were turned in last week. It was just a whole lot of waiting.
That's why I had no problem with leaving after my first class. Okay, it wasn't like I'd had issues with it before, but now it felt different.
I didn't text Jamie to ditch with me. No, today I had a mission. It'd been over a month since Colby and I found the picture. I wanted answers.
The diner was now closed on Mondays so I hoped I'd find Kat at home.
She looked up from her coffee when I pulled open the door.
“Hi, sweetie, what are you doing home?”
I marched toward the table and slapped the picture down.
It took a moment for the image to register with her. “Where did you find this?” She lifted it gingerly to get a better look.
I didn't answer her question. “That's our dad, isn't it?”
“Yes.” Thickness clouded her voice. “That's Asher.”
“Asher?” I demanded. “Then who the hell is E?” I turned the picture over to show her the writing on the back.
She sighed. “There's so much you don't know.”
“And whose fault is that?” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Yours and mom's.”
“Don't you dare blame this on her.”
“She never told us anything.”
“You were a kid when she died,” Kat yelled. Squeezing her eyes shut, she sighed. “You're still a kid.” Opening her eyes, she stared at me in sadness. “If I tell you, you're going to go. I know you, Cal. And your mom didn't want you in that life.”
“Go where? What life?”
“California.” She stood up slowly. “Come on.”
I followed her into her room. She stepped into her closet, returning a moment later with a small box. Setting it on the bed, she gestured for me to take a seat.
“Callie, you have to promise me you won't judge your mom too harshly.”
“Why?”
“Promise me.”
“It won't make me stop loving her if that's what you mean.”
She sighed. “I guess that'll have to be good enough.”
She lifted the lid off the box and took out a stack of news clippings and pictures. Sliding the first one across to me, she said, “To start, this was your mom.”
The headline read Emma Bay Lands the Role of a Lifetime.
“Emma Bay?” My heart pounded in my ears as I recognized the young girl in the picture.
“That was her Hollywood name.” Kat sat next to me. “I was so proud when she was cast in her first role. I told everyone my sister was going to be a big star.”
“Was she?”
A tear leaked from the corner of her eye as she nodded. I picked up the next few press clippings, each about a girl named Emma Bay who
was the darling of Hollywood.
My mom? A movie star?
“She met Asher Hendrick during a movie when she was playing a surf whiz. Her favorite kind of role.”
Asher Hendrick. A name for the face. A niggling sense of recognition bit at me.
“Asher was the son of a studio owner.”
“Wait a second,” I stopped her, my head spinning. “The Asher Hendrick. Hendrick's Productions. Everyone knows him.”
Kat nodded, watching me warily. “That's him. Cal, I need to get this story out before my better judgment stops me.”
“No more interruptions. Got it.”
“Asher was wild. Irresponsible. And your mother loved him completely. He took her down a dark path that is so easy to find in that town. The drinking. The drugs. Then one night they were out at a club. A man was quite aggressive with your mom. Asher was the jealous type, the angry type.”
“The fight didn't last long because Asher was on something, crazed. The man almost died and Asher was arrested.”
“Oh my God.” I covered my mouth.
Kat continued. “Asher's father was a dangerous man. He controlled much of what went on in that town, but this was something he couldn't fix. Asher only got a few months, but his father blamed your mom, the great Emma Bay. He started working against her to ruin her career, spreading nasty things around Hollywood and putting pressure on the studios who were producing her current movies. She was a determined woman and took everything he threw at her. Then he tried to force her out another way; to scare her, make her run.”
“So, he had his thugs show up at her place, smashing a window to break in. They held her at gunpoint. It worked. Emma Bay disappeared from Hollywood and Allison McCoy showed back up in Gulf City, a new look, old name, and newly pregnant.”
“When Asher got out of prison a few months later, he tried to use the media to find her, but she was gone.”
She grew quiet. I blew out a long breath, trying to calm myself as I watched the tears roll freely down Kat's face. Had I even known my mother at all? She was this whole other person that had nothing to do with Allison McCoy.