When I got there, they were standing by the stands waiting for me. I walked over and Shane walked toward me a little, greeting me with a quick hand shake, "Well he finally returns!"
I laughed and shook his hand and then Eric's. Who looked me up and down and mockingly said, "Look, it's Ryan the big football star. Too good for his friends."
I started stretching for our run and joked back with them. "Knock that shit off. You guys have been busy too."
Eric laughed, "Yeah. It's good to see ya man."
"It's good to see you guys too."
We ran and then sat down on the ground and caught up. It sounded like they were both having fun in school and they were really interested in hearing about playing football for Auburn.
They were also enjoying the abundance of girls in college and asked about the girls in Alabama. They were both equally disappointed in me when I told them I didn't have time to meet that many.
We all parted and promised to keep in touch.
Christmas morning I woke up and had hot cocoa with my mom and grandma while we opened presents, which was a tradition, going back to when I was four years old.
My presents consisted of clothes and non-perishable food items to take back to my dorm. My mom beamed when she opened her present, which was a sweatshirt that said, Proud Mom of an Auburn Football Player.
I got my grandma the same thing with mom replaced with grandma and she gave me a big hug and told me "Thank you."
I spent the next few days with them and being lazy for the most part with exception to my daily run.
I had sent a text to Maddy on Christmas day to tell her Merry Christmas and got a simple "You too!" back. I wanted to ask if she wanted to hang out, but had talked myself out of it.
A day before New Year's Eve I got a text from my cousin, Josh, asking if I wanted to go to a party in Great Bend at the lake house.
I thought about it. Maddy would more than likely be there and it would be a nice casual way to see her. I made plans with him to go.
The next night I drove to Josh's house and then we drove separately out to the lake house in case one of us wanted to leave early. Memories of the night we met and the night we broke up flooded my mind as I stared at the large house.
We walked in and my eyes instantly zoned in on Maddy. She had her back to me and was talking to Michelle. No guys were around her. I walked up and smiled at Michelle who said, "Good timing."
Maddy turned around to see who she was talking to and looked slightly surprised to see me, "Ryan? What are you doing here?"
I examined her, she looked the exact same. I gave her a quick hug and told her I was home for break and I had tagged along with Josh. I also added that I stopped by to see her because I hadn't heard much from her. I guess I was hoping for an explanation even though she didn't owe me one.
She looked a little guilty and said, "I'm sorry I've been kind of busy this year."
I smiled. "Yeah senior year is a crazy time."
She took a drink from the cup in her hand and asked me how college was. Before I could answer Michelle said, "Well I'm gonna go get more to drink. You two have fun." She really emphasized the word fun.
After she left I answered the question, "College is good. It's really busy, but it has been fun too."
She nodded, "Well that's good. I'm glad you like it."
"How's your senior year going besides being busy?"
She looked like she was thinking about what to say and it seemed like she was holding something back when she answered, "It's been okay, just hanging out with friends and applying to colleges. I'm going to K-State next fall."
"That's awesome. Congratulations."
Just before midnight we were still catching up. She seemed a little distracted and I finally asked, "Are you seeing anyone?"
I held my breath waiting for her answer, "No, not really."
I wasn't sure what that meant, "Not really? That sounds a little complicated."
She took a small drink, "No it's actually pretty simple."
I wanted to ask more questions, buy her face was saying she didn't want to talk about it. But she was single.
When people counted down at midnight I took a chance and leaned over and kissed her. I felt her kiss me back and smiled into the kiss, relieved she didn't push me away. I had missed her so much and was pleasantly surprised when she grabbed my hand and led me down to the bedroom in the basement.
After we were in the small room we both moved slowly undressing each other. Her body was flawless and I mine had missed her touch.
We laid down on the bed left only in our underwear. She seemed more confident than the last time we were here and I held her face gently and looked into her blue eyes, "Maddy, are you still a virgin?"
She gazed back at me and simply told me no.
My chest tightened a little with her answer. We had ended our relationship and she was free to do whatever she wanted, but I really didn't think she would sleep with anyone else. I didn't say a word and just started kissing her again.
We both fully undressed and I got a condom out of my wallet and slipped it on. I couldn't wait any longer and slowly pushed inside of her. Being with Maddy was indescribable. We moved together slowly, finding a perfect rhythm until we both got to an explosive end. We laid together, cuddled up for the rest of the night.
When I woke up the next morning, Maddy was lying on my bare chest. Everything felt right again. I had a huge uncontrollable grin on my face when Maddy opened her eyes. "Good morning."
She smiled back. "Good morning."
I hugged her small body closer to mine and then told her I had to get going. I was supposed to have lunch with my mom before my flight that night.
She told me it was good to see me.
We got dressed and she walked with me out to my car. When I opened the car door I looked back at Maddy, "I've missed you so much this year. I'm so glad I decided to go to the party last night."
She smiled at me and told me she had missed me too.
I was happy to hear that. It didn't matter that she had been with someone else. We were together again. "So we will email and text all of the time and the rest of the school year will be a lot better."
She agreed with that and kissed me. I left to go back to my house. I thought about the night before the entire way back. I felt like myself again. Strange how Maddy seemed to complete me.
I made it home and packed my bags. I hugged my grandma goodbye and then went off to lunch with my mom. When we sat down she asked, "So was Maddy at the party last night?"
"Yes."
She raised an eyebrow like she knew there was more to it. I grinned, "We are back together."
Instead of looking happy for me she had a look of concern, "Are you sure that's a good idea? I mean Maddy is a sweet girl, but you are in two different places in life and long distance relationships are hard."
I listened to what she had to say even though I was a little irritated. "I love her mom. That's all that matters."
"I just don't want either of you to get hurt."
"Nothing could ever make me hurt her and I trust her."
She still looked worried, but didn't say anything else.
At the airport she hugged me goodbye and I flew back to Alabama. When I got there campus was pretty empty and I went upstairs to my dorm, which was empty.
I unpacked and watched TV for a little bit and sent a text to Maddy letting her know I got back safe. She replied instantly and told me she was glad I made it back safely.
Around ten o' clock, Pete came barging in the door. I looked over at the doorway, "Hey."
"Hey! Damn it's good to be back!"
"Didn't have a good break?"
He plopped down on the couch next to me, "It was alright. Hung out with a girl I used to fool around with in high school. Got lectured by my dad and oldest brother about how my grades should be better. Blah blah blah."
I laughed. He asked me how my break was and I thought about leaving the part
about getting back together with Maddy out, but decided just to get it over with. "It was great. I ran into Maddy. Started dating her again."
He grumbled, "Ugh, you've got to be kidding me. I told you not to do anything stupid, so what do you do you go and date your ex-girlfriend who lives a thousand miles away!"
"I know, but we're gonna make it work. We're gonna text and call and it will be fine."
"You sound like a chick."
"Thanks."
He stood up and reached his hands up stretching. "I don't get it man. This girl must be something else."
I grinned. "She's amazing."
He looked at me like I was crazy and then went into his room.
The second semester went a little easier. We still had team meetings and practice every day, but the team meeting didn't start until eight in the morning and we didn't have a practice in the mornings - just one in the evening.
Maddy and I did a lot better at texting and emailing each other, but we were both still really busy.
I went to a few parties with Pete and Trevor, who were always trying to get me to hook up with some random girl. I wasn't even tempted. I knew what I had with Maddy was special.
Spring semester ended, and we had a few days off. The week after finals, we were told we had ten days off. That was it. Ten days of summer vacation and then we had to come back. I decided to take a couple of classes during the summer since I was going to be there anyway.
I didn't care I was going to spend every bit of the ten days I had off with Maddy.
I knew her senior prom was coming up and she had told me she was planning on going with Michelle and Jackie. Her prom was scheduled for my first day off, so I left early that morning after telling Pete and a few other teammates goodbye and drove home. I decided to drive since I would be home for a while, and I didn't want to have to borrow my mom's car every time I went to see Maddy.
I knew I wasn't going to make it in time for prom, but I could get there for the after party. I drove out to the lake house at around eleven and walked in.
I was exhausted from the long drive, but excited to get to hold Maddy again. When I walked in I scanned the room and saw Maddy standing with a large group. I snuck up slowly behind her and wrapped my arms around her and whispered softly in her ear, "Guess who?"
She turned around and looked really surprised to see me, "Ryan. What are you doing here?"
I smiled at her, "Well I wanted to take you to prom, but it's a long drive from Alabama so I figured I could at least make it to the after party. I thought about telling you when we talked Wednesday, but thought a surprise would be better."
Jake who was standing next to Maddy looked confused and said, "You guys still talk?"
Maddy had mentioned that things had gotten better with Jake and Andy and they weren't torturing her anymore, but I didn't know why he was asking. I looked over at him, "Of course we do."
He looked oddly irritated and I looked back at Maddy whose attention was on me, "I can't believe you drove all the way here."
I pulled her close to me and said quietly, “Of course. I've wanted to see you again since New Year's."
She had a strange look on her face and then I heard Jake ask me, "You were here for New Year's?"
I didn't know why he was so interested and I looked over at him, irritated, "Yes." And then I looked back at Maddy. He looked over at her also, "He was here? Did you sleep with him?"
Maddy looked sick and like she wanted to be anywhere, but here. I fixed my eyes on Jake who looked pissed. I told him it was none of his business.
My eyes returned to Maddy when she meekly said, "Well that's not necessarily true. I mean..." She looked to her friends for help who were all just staring back at her.
I didn't know what the hell was going on. "What do you mean? Why would it be any of his business?"
Jake and I both were staring at Maddy who looked totally lost. "Ryan..."
The minute she said my name, it clicked. Jake. It was Jake she lost her virginity to. Fucking Jake. "Seriously? Jake? He's who you slept with before me?"
Maddy didn’t say anything, but her friend Jackie piped up, "You slept with Jake? And Ryan? You aren't a virgin anymore?"
Well, at least I wasn't the only one in the dark.
Jake looked even more surprised than I did, if that was possible. "You did sleep with him?"
I glared over at Jake, "Why the hell do you care? It's not like you were dating." I paused. I actually didn't know if that was true. I looked over at Maddy, "Were you?"
She shook her head, "No, we weren't dating."
She looked around at her friends before settling on me. I was pissed and still so confused. "What the hell is going on Maddy? Have you slept with Jake since we slept together?"
I watched as she nodded her head slowly and said so quietly I could barely hear her, "Yes."
I felt like someone had punched me as hard as they could in my stomach. I looked around and saw all of her friend’s eyes on me, waiting to see what I was going to say next. I pointed to an empty space in the room and asked Maddy to go talk to me privately.
She agreed and walked over with me. I didn't know what to say. I had been so stupid. "I thought we were dating again."
"What? You did? We never talked about that."
"We said that we would keep in touch and you said that you missed me!"
She looked down at the floor and then back up. "Ryan, I am so sorry. I had no idea. I thought it was just a hook up. I mean it was nice..."
A hook up? Obviously I didn't mean the same to her as she meant to me. I had read her completely wrong. I thought she was a sweet innocent girl, but she had become a different person. Or maybe that was who she always was and I had been blind to it. I interrupted her set off by the word nice, "Nice? Are you fucking kidding me Maddy? Nice. I haven't been with anyone since then. I thought we were together."
She spoke quietly, "I am so sorry, Ryan. I had no idea."
How could she be so clueless? Or was it me? Shit. I glared at her, "You've changed so much. You gave your virginity to someone who treated you like shit. You're perfectly happy with hooking up with whoever is there at the moment and don't stop to think about people's feelings."
The more I thought about it the angrier I got. I wasted so much time thinking about her and she didn't spend a damn minute thinking about me. "Wow. You and Jake deserve each other."
I just left her standing there looking stunned. I went outside and tried to calm down before I drove home.
I took deep breaths and got in my car and drove back to my house. I went over every conversation I had with Maddy. Every text. How could I be so fucking stupid?
Chapter 8
When I got home I was grateful that my mom and grandma were asleep. I didn't want to see anyone or talk about it. I hadn't told them I was coming in that night because I had planned on camping out with Maddy.
I very quietly snuck into my room and took my shirt and jeans off and got under the covers. Laying in my bed I continued to obsess.
Maddy had been sleeping with Jake. I wasted my first year of college thinking about a girl who had completely moved on. I couldn't believe how pathetic I had been.
I thought back to the morning after Maddy and I had slept together. We had never officially said we were dating again. I was just so desperate to be with her that I heard what I wanted to hear. Every time I talked to her after that she had just thought we were friends.
I had told her I loved her a few times and thinking back she had never said it back. It was always, "I care about you too" or "You'll always be special to me too."
I pulled the pillow from underneath my head and put it over my face, to muffle the loud groan that came out of my mouth.
That was it. I was fucking done with dating and relationships. I obviously had no idea what I was doing. I decided that night I was going to focus on school and football and that was it. I was going to try like hell not to think about Madison Wright again.
; I finally fell asleep at four in the morning. I woke up to my mom shaking my shoulder, "Ryan! You didn't tell us you were coming home last night!"
I opened my eyes and looked over at the clock next to my bed. Eight a.m. I sat up slowly rubbing my eyes. "Surprise."
She smiled and sat on my bed, "Yes it certainly was. I saw your door was opened and someone was sleeping in your bed. I was pretty relieved when I saw your face."
"Sorry. I didn't want to wake you. I got in kinda late."
"Well yeah I imagine. It's a long drive."
"Yeah."
She patted the bed and stood up, "Well I'll let you rest. I just wanted to tell you hi."
"Thanks mom."
She left and I tossed and turned for another hour before giving up and putting on a pair of shorts and my old high school t-shirt. I went for a long run around the neighborhood trying to clear my head.
I kept thinking about Maddy. Jake had looked pissed last night and I wondered like a fucking idiot if they had made up.
I ran all the way to Cory's house, which was only about four blocks, and knocked on his front door. His mom answered, "Well hi Ryan!"
I was breathing a little heavier than normal from the run, "Hi Mrs. Kern. Is Cory home?"
"No, I'm sorry. He decided to stay in New York for the summer. He didn't tell you?"
I shook my head. I hadn't talked to Cory for months. I hated that I was losing touch with him. We had been friends for so long. "No. I guess it's been a while since we talked."
"Yeah well I imagine you are very busy in Alabama and I know Cory has been busy in New York. I'm lucky if I hear from him once a week."
I thanked her and then ran back to my house. Usually, running was freeing for me, but not that day. That day my head was full of every thought imaginable.
When I walked back into my house I was covered in sweat and went and took a shower. Afterward I went out in the living room and found my grandma putting a puzzle on the coffee table. I sat next to her and picked up a piece trying to find its place.
When I was younger I had spent hours doing puzzles with my grandma, and the memories of it brought a smile to my face.
Rebound (Soulmates Book 3) Page 6
