Above all Else

by Sophia R Heart

  "Yeah," I said, pausing, "in Mom and Dad's room."

  He groaned. "You stay here, and I'll go get them. Where are they exactly?"

  "No, that's okay. I'll go with you," I said quickly. I didn’t want to be left alone in the dark. Even Kellan’s company was preferable to no company at all.

  He paused for a second, seeming to read the anxiety in my voice. "Okay," he said softly.

  He was being... nice – which was surprising. I'd expected him to poke fun at me for being so scared.

  We set base in the living room after locating the candles, some blankets, and an old oil lamp left over from Halloween years ago. Kellan took a lighter out of his pocket, and lit the candles and oil lamp.

  "Why are you still carrying that around?" I asked. Kellan had been trying to quit smoking these past few months... or so we’d all thought.

  "Sentiment. I haven't had a smoke since I started living here. I really have been trying to quit, so you can stop with the accusing eyes." Kellan paused, and then amended, "I haven't had more than one smoke since I got here. I slipped up... once.”

  "I believe you," I said, and I did. Kellan wasn’t a liar. If he didn’t want to tell the truth, then he just wouldn’t speak at all. There was a moment of silence before I spoke again. "How long do you think it’ll be until the power comes back on?"

  "I have no idea. The whole block’s out from what I can tell," he told me. Putting the lighter down on the coffee table, he picked up a blanket. "Scoot over."

  I shuffled further down the couch, and he settled in beside me. I jumped when a flash of lightening tore across the room.

  He pulled out a deck of cards, distracting me. “Do you know how to play blackjack?”

  “You want to play blackjack?” I asked, stupefied.

  “What else is there to do?”

  Good question. I shrugged, tugging the blanket close around my shoulders. “Okay.”

  We played for a while before moving on to board games. When the power turned back on two hours later, I hadn’t even realized that the storm outside had calmed. I’d forgotten all about it.

  - NOW -

  I remember feeling content and warm that night, both from the blanket wrapped securely around me and the heat of Kellan's body beside me. I felt no warmth or contentment during this storm. Well, physically, I was warm. Though the power had gone out again, just like last time, we had a fireplace in this house. Kellan had started a fire, and regularly got up to stroke the flames. It was my concern for Dad, growing as the hours passed, that chilled me to the core.

  "What time did he say he'd be back?" I asked Kellan.

  "I told you. He didn't." Kellan shone a flashlight at the clock on the wall, something in his eyes making me pause.

  "But he was supposed to be back by now?" I pressed.

  "He could be held up somewhere," Kellan said.

  I tried calling him again on my cell phone, but there was no signal. “Maybe I should try it upstairs again.”

  “April, you’ve already walked all around the house. There’s no signal. We’ll have to wait until the storm passes. Mario’s probably holed up in a restaurant, or a warm bar, waiting out the storm.”

  I sighed, hoping he was right and that I was just feeling paranoid because of yesterday. Kellan leaned back against the couch, stretching his feet out in front of him, as he clicked off the flashlight.

  We were sitting on the floor near the fireplace. It had grown dark a while back, the only light in the room coming from the soft orange flames of the fire.

  I fell silent, and picked up my guitar, comforted by its familiarity against my fingers. I felt pensive, and the music I played reflected that, casting a poignant air across the room.

  I glanced up at one point and caught Kellan’s startling grey eyes, slightly hooded, watching me. "Sing something," he said quietly, not looking away from me.

  The light of the fireplace emphasized the panes of his face and brought them to a sharp focus; the slant of his eyebrows, the deep dimple on his left cheek, and those sinfully full lips. He was breathtaking.

  It really wasn't fair to the rest of the male population.

  "No," I said, my lips curving up into a small smile. I loved saying no to him. It was my favorite pastime.

  His lips quirked up at the corners, his dimple making an adorable appearance. "Please?" he asked, glancing up at me through those incredibly long lashes of his.

  I looked away. Blinking rapidly, I began to play another song, and this time, I sang the lyrics too. Mom and Dad’s wedding song. I'd watched their wedding movie hundreds of times. It had always enchanted me when I was younger, seeing all the pretty flowers and gorgeous dresses. Mom and Dad had looked so young and blissfully happy.

  I hadn’t watched it again after Mom died, and felt a sudden longing to see her face. Pictures didn’t capture her presence, her energy, the same way.

  The fire continued to cackle as I played, and I lost myself in the music, in the memories, until a loud rumble of thunder reached my ears. Goosebumps broke out on my arm – though that might have been from the intense way that Kellan was watching me.

  Strumming the last and final note, I put my guitar down on the ground next to me. He didn’t speak, just continued to watch me.

  “What?" I asked.

  He looked away. "Nothing… you have a beautiful voice," he said quietly.

  "Thanks," I said, swallowing. I wondered if I was imagining the strange vibe between us.

  It was another two hours later, while the storm was still raging and after we’d had dinner, that my cell phone lit up on the table as a text from Axel came through. Finally. There was a signal.

  I snatched up my cell, and dialed Dad’s number. I could text Axel back later.

  "It's ringing," I told Kellan, my leg bouncing up and down as I waited for Dad to pick up. With each passing ring, my worry mounted. Kellan shifted closer, his ear pressed up against the cell phone on the other side of me so he could listen too. Any other time and I might have been off-balanced by how close our faces were.

  The call went to voicemail.

  Kellan leaned back. Worry and tension mounted in the air around us. My eyes caught his, and he seemed to read the unspoken, 'what now?' in them.

  "Don't panic – there could be a million reasons why he didn't pick up. Just go to sleep, and we'll try again in the morning once the storm’s over."

  Despite his words, I still tried to call Dad one more time, but the signal had disappeared. I made myself comfortable on the sofa and tried to sleep. Kellan was right. Dad was probably held up somewhere because of the storm.

  Eventually, I drifted off into a restless slumber.

  I awoke once in the middle of the night to hear Kellan trying to quietly call Dad again, going against his own advice.

  * * *

  "April." A gentle hand shook me awake, and I blinked blearily at my surroundings. I was disoriented to find myself on the couch downstairs. As soon as everything from yesterday came back to me, I sat up so fast I got a head rush.

  "Dad?" I asked, the word sounding hoarse.

  "He's not here," Kellan said, looking exhausted. I didn’t think he’d slept at all. There were dark circles under his eyes, but underneath the tiredness, there was a steely resolve, an intense determination, to find out what was going on.

  "Have you tried calling him today?" I asked, grabbing my phone. I couldn't believe I'd slept so long. "Oh shit. I’m late for work!" I said, catching sight of the time on my cell.

  "It's okay, ballerina." Kellan gently pushed my shoulders back down on the sofa. "I already called in for you, and said you were sick."

  I stopped resisting his hands and sat down. "And Dad?"

  Kellan hesitated, and I heard some rustling out in the hallway. "Luke's here," he said quickly, but he was too late. In that split second, hope had seared within my chest before it took a quick nosedive.

  Today, in the brightness of the d
ay, everything seemed so much more distressing. Where was Dad? Last night, I'd thought he'd gotten delayed by the storm somehow, but he hadn't called, and he wasn't answering his phone. That wasn't like Dad at all.

  Had there been an accident? Did this have something to do with Archie Chambers? Was he hurt?

  Kellan stepped outside for a smoke just as Uncle Luke walked into the living room.

  "Hey, squirt." Uncle Luke smiled. I hadn’t seen him for a while. He was one of Dad's closest friends and a good friend of the family. He'd been a police officer before becoming a fugitive enforcement agent, also known as a bounty hunter. He’d settled down in recent years and was now back with the police force.

  "Hey." I gave him a weak smile, and he came over and pulled me into a hug. He was in uniform, and for some reason, that comforted me.

  "Now, don't you go worrying about a single thing, April," Uncle Luke said to me, pulling back. “Most likely, this is all just a misunderstanding.”

  Yeah, right. I knew he meant well, but there was no way that I would stop worrying.

  The storm had long since passed. Dad should have called by now. He would have called. Even if something had happened to his cell phone, he could have used a pay phone. He would have moved heaven and earth to let us know that he was okay, which made me think he wasn’t. And that fucking petrified me.

  Kellan came in after his smoke break, striding purposefully towards the couch. "Mario left yesterday to question a Mrs. Sydney Hale. I think I should go and have a word with her. See what happened."

  “Sounds good to me.” I was relieved to hear some plan of action.

  “If you could stay here while I’m gone,” Kellan said, turning to Uncle Luke.

  But Uncle Luke didn't want Kellan going alone – not when Dad hadn't returned from his visit yesterday. I agreed wholly, and in the end, Uncle Luke made a phone call, requesting for an officer to be sent to the house.

  I thought this was overkill, but Kellan reminded me that Archie was likely still out there somewhere. His words chilled me to the bone. If Archie Chambers had anything to do with this... rage and fear encompassed me.

  He'd wanted revenge, and it absolutely terrified me to wonder if he'd gotten it.

  * * *

  I was wearing a hole in the living room carpet a few hours later, waiting for Kellan and Uncle Luke to get back.

  Officer Morgan sat on the couch, a cup of coffee in one hand and a cookie in the other. He’d get up every half hour to walk the perimeter of the house, but otherwise stayed put on the couch, keeping a watchful eye out of the window.

  I tried calling Dad's phone several more times; all to no avail. It went straight to voicemail every time.

  Hearing the front door open, I turned around to see Kellan and Uncle Luke walk in.

  "Well?" I asked anxiously, unable to decipher anything from their faces. Officer Morgan excused himself to go outside after a short nod from Uncle Luke. "What happened?"

  "Mrs. Hale denied ever having seen your father yesterday," Uncle Luke said, brows furrowed pensively.

  "Well, of course she'd say that!" I said.

  "That's what we thought too." Kellan sat down on the couch, sighing tiredly. "Luckily, her apartment complex had security cameras. After fast forwarding through several hours’ worth of it, we concluded that Mario never reached his target location.”

  "So... what are you saying? He never made it there?" I asked, swallowing what felt like a huge ball in my throat.

  Kellan nodded.

  I felt like the rug was being pulled out from under my feet, and sat down heavily on the couch. Kellan's hand twitched, and for a moment, I thought he was going to reach out to take my own.

  “We’ll find him, April. I promise you, we’ll find him,” Uncle Luke said, determination in his steely eyes. "As soon as twenty-four hours are up, we'll be able to file a missing person’s report, and normal procedures will ensue. For now, I'll still use every measure at my disposal to find him.”

  I nodded and thanked him, even as I blinked back tears. I was so glad that they were both there. I didn't know what I'd do if I were facing my worst nightmare alone. Every time Dad had left for work, I'd always feared him never returning home.

  I was living that reality now, and it was worse than I’d feared.

  "Do you... do you think it was that guy, Archie?" I asked, holding my breath. Kellan’s jaw clenched.

  "That is a very real possibility," Uncle Luke said sympathetically. My heart ached, fear making my body tremble. What had happened to Dad? Maybe he was chasing another lead... maybe... God, I was grasping at straws. I couldn't come up with one single reason why Dad wouldn’t have called if he got held up somewhere.

  Uncle Luke stayed for the next few hours, asking a few questions, but mostly, he tried to lighten the mood. It didn't work. Kellan kept getting up and going outside. I could see him from the window, smoking, or on the phone, speaking to someone with an urgent look on his face. Even when he was in the room, I carried on staring out of the window, hoping and wishing that Dad's car would pull up the driveway.

  I was cleaning up after a late lunch when Kellan's phone rang. Something in his eyes made me pause, as he excused himself and stepped out into the hallway.

  I strained my ears, but couldn’t make out more than a handful of words. Dad’s name was mentioned.

  "Who was that? What's going on?" I asked, biting my lip anxiously as he walked in.

  "A trace has been found on your dad's phone.” His face was inscrutable.

  "I'm coming with you," I said immediately.

  "Wait, hold up," Uncle Luke said, looking at Kellan in confusion. "How did you get a trace on the phone? I’ve got one of my best guys working on getting a GPS signal."

  "I had… an old friend track Mario's phone for me," Kellan said, not looking very forthcoming. “He’s one of the best, and I didn’t want to waste anymore time.”

  Uncle Luke looked like he wanted to ask more questions, but seeing the hard look on Kellan’s face, he seemed to decide against it. "Well, I'll call in for backup and–"

  "I want to come too," I interjected before any of them got any ideas. I stood up and crossed my arms, ready to go.

  Kellan and Uncle Luke exchanged a glance.

  “You can’t,” Kellan said, shaking his head.

  “Why not? He’s my dad. I want to go,” I said. Seeing he wasn’t about to relent, I added pleadingly, “I can’t stay here, wondering and waiting, for another second. Please.”

  Kellan looked sympathetic, but resolute.

  “April, it’s for the best if you wait here,” Uncle Luke said, his voice firm yet kind. “We… we don’t know what we’ll find.”

  I swayed a little on my feet, and both Kellan and Uncle Luke reached for me at the same time. Kellan got there first and helped me sit down on the couch. “We’ll be back as soon as we can, April. Officer Morgan will be here if you need anything.”

  I watched them go, fear and anxiety warring within me.

  * * *

  I jumped up about an hour later when I heard the front door open. They were back sooner than I’d expected. I rushed into the hallway, something in me wilting when I saw that Dad wasn’t with them. I searched both their faces, looking for an answer… looking for something.

  “Why don’t we take a seat inside?” Uncle Luke said.

  “Kellan?” I looked at him weakly.

  “We didn’t find him,” Kellan said, probably reading the worst in my eyes.

  “You didn’t find the trace?” I asked, confused.

  “We found his phone. It was on a random street in the suburbs, lying in someone’s yard,” Kellan told me, his face twisting.

  “It’s likely that it was just abandoned there, but we’ll still be interviewing the neighbors and the occupants of the house. Find out if anyone saw anything,” Uncle Luke told me.

  I nodded numbly, and walked back to the couch. More waiting. I didn’t know
whether to be relieved or disappointed. I needed answers. I needed Dad.

  "Hey," Kellan said softly, resting his hand on my knee. I looked up at him, as he took a seat next to me, biting hard on my bottom lip to stop it from trembling. "It's going to be okay. We'll find him."

  I nodded, glancing away. Dad's phone was in someone's yard. Abandoned. I didn't know what to think. I didn't want to think at all. I just wanted him home.

  Uncle Luke left after a bit, telling me he’d be back soon. One of his colleagues was outside, and they’d be going to interview the people on the street where the phone was found.

  Kellan stayed with me, and when Uncle Luke returned with no news, he got up to leave.

  After making sure all the windows were shut and the back door was locked, he hovered by the couch where I was slumped, looking conflicted.

  "Do you need anything?" he asked finally, and I shook my head. "I'll be back in a few hours. I need to… do something. I can’t wait. I’m gonna go search some of the places we used to go. Find out if anyone’s seen him. Okay?”

  I nodded, curling into a ball on the couch. Kellan didn’t move for a full minute. Then after a final worried glance in my direction, he left.

  I waited. I waited for answers. I waited for Dad. The wait turned from hours into days, and then from days into weeks.

  I carried on waiting.

  CHAPTER SIX

  * * *

  - THEN -

  Four years ago

  "DAD?" I SAID SOFTLY, padding into the kitchen.

  "Hey, sweetheart. Shouldn't you be asleep?" Dad asked, looking up from where he'd been staring down at the mug on the table in front of him. I’d intended to quickly say goodnight, but seeing the morose look on his face, I made my way over to him.