The Secret Wolf (A Full Moon Mercy Novel) (shifter / MC romance)

by Ana W. Fawkes

  "Lucas, is she a... like you?"

  "No," Lucas said. "She can't shift. She's as human as you."

  "I don't like being compared to that," Leah muttered. "She looks like a stripper."

  "She is," Lucas said.

  "Oh."

  The knife in Leah's heart twisted some more. But there were more important things to focus on.

  "Leah, she's not like me," Lucas said.

  "So how does that work with a baby?"

  "It shouldn't work," Lucas said.

  "Shouldn't? Does that mean it could happen?"

  Lucas turned and pounded his hands against the bedroom door. "It's not supposed to happen."

  "But it did," Leah said.

  Lucas looked back at Leah. "I guess so."

  Leah gave it a few seconds before speaking again. "I have to go. I can't be here for this. This isn't my place right now, Lucas."

  "Don't," Lucas said. "There's so much out there waiting for you, Leah. You know a lot right now."

  "I know that a woman is in your room right now carrying your baby. You need to deal with that first."

  Lucas looked at the door again. Leah stepped up to him and wrapped her arms around him as though she were on his motorcycle. She turned her head and placed it against his leather jacket. She inhaled the scent of Lucas... man, leather, the road, smoke, desire, and need. She told herself she could smell the beast within Lucas but she couldn't really be sure of that. As she squeezed tight, she felt tears rush to her eyes. It seemed so foolish to actually believe she could exist in this kind of world. A world where Lucas lived his life as a kind of renegade biker. A world where he contained a deep dark secret that he could indeed shift from man to wolf.

  "I'll miss you, Lucas," Leah said.

  "Don't say that."

  "I did. And I'll say it again."

  "No," Lucas growled. "You don't get it, Leah. What we have... what happened..."

  "Take care of your business," Leah said.

  She released her hold on Lucas and slid away. The walk down the hallway toward the bar was lonely and loud. As she passed through the bar, she considered just how many strong bikers were around her. She also wondered how many of them were like Lucas. Maybe they all were. Maybe that was part of the rite of passage. If a born man could become a beast that is. Perhaps Lucas was born the way he was. Perhaps he was somehow changed.

  The thoughts flooded Leah's mind as she hurried through the bar area. When she spotted Vince, she tried to look away, but she felt his eyes burning at her. It made her move even faster. Her life then felt endangered. It almost made her want to turn and run back to Lucas. She would endure whatever conversation he needed to have with Debbie.

  Leah kept moving.

  She left the bar and hurried down the steps and when she was finally outside, she leaned against the brick building, feeling the cool night air against her burning face. As she blinked, a tear fell from her eye.

  How could she have let herself fall like this? Lucas was a biker. Lucas was a werewolf. Lucas was almost like Richie, only he didn't hurt her with his fists. It felt like Leah was stuck in a cycle. From guy to guy, they all seemed the same.

  But that couldn't be true with Lucas.

  It just couldn't.

  Lucas meant something to her.

  The rumbling of a motorcycle came with a blinding light down the alleyway. Leah froze and watched as a motorcycle and a car came into the parking lot. When she saw the windshield of the car she realized who it was. It was the other guys from before. The one who was a wolf like Lucas... Cooper. He was the one on the motorcycle. He parked his bike and climbed from it. The car stopped without parking in a spot. As Cooper walked into the headlights of the car, Leah gasped and placed her hands to the brick wall, her nails scratching against it.

  Cooper was covered in blood. His face. His hair. His clothing. It looked like he had rolled into a puddle of blood.

  "Whoa, who is this?" he asked when he saw Leah.

  "It's... I'm Leah. With Lucas."

  The car door opened and the other guy climbed out.

  "What the fuck are you doing, Cooper? You need to get cleaned..."

  "Look, Ian," Cooper said.

  That's when two sets of eyes were upon Leah.

  Leah looked at the man outside the car and watched as he sniffed the air. The way his nose moved, she could sense it. He was a werewolf too. That meant there were at least three of them she knew of. Probably four, considering the way Vince had been staring at her.

  "I was just leaving," Leah said. "Lucas... has business."

  Leah moved from the wall and took two steps when Ian moved into her direct path. She cringed and began to shake her head.

  "I won't say anything," she said. "I mean, you can trust me."

  "Say anything about what?" Ian asked.

  His eyes were narrow, scanning Leah. She looked over her shoulder and glanced at Cooper as he stood in front of the headlights, sopping with blood. Just a minute ago he looked terrifying, but now, it didn't bother Leah at all. She thought about what Lucas had said. How Cooper was having a hard time controlling himself. She believed that whoever Cooper had killed was perhaps someone who had it coming to them. Playing judge and jury with someone's life seemed very wrong but maybe that was because Leah was human.

  "I'm just leaving," Leah said. "That's all."

  She took a small step, hoping Ian would get out of her way. He didn't. He stood his ground, staring at her.

  Feeling cornered, Leah wasn't sure what to do. She told herself to ignore the first thing that came to mind, but that didn't happen.

  "I saw Lucas," Leah said. "Cooper too. I was right there. I know."

  Ian laughed. "You did see plenty, didn't you?"

  Leah nodded. "I can be trusted."

  "I'm sure you could. Get in the car, I'll take you home."

  "It's okay. I'll walk."

  "You know more as a human than most humans should know. You left without Lucas, telling me there's trouble to smell in the air. Plus, I know about the mountain. You want to walk home? You want to walk into a trap?"

  "A trap?" Leah asked. "What kind of trap?"

  "Just get in the car."

  Ian walked by Leah, leaving her feeling cold. She slowly walked to the passenger side of the car and walked as Ian directed Cooper into the building, telling him to hurry and shower all the blood off himself and burn his clothes. Leah knew there was no way Cooper would be able to walk through the bar without being seen. She wondered what the reaction would be like. Probably celebratory.

  It made her shiver.

  When Ian returned to the car, Leah climbed in and shut the door. She looked at the bullet wedged in the windshield.

  "No worries," Ian said. "Once I drop you off, I'm taking the car to be taken care of."

  "What does that mean?" Leah asked.

  Ian smiled. "The car will never exist again."

  Ian drove fast and didn't speak. Leah directed him where to go. He stopped in front of her apartment building and Leah found herself just sitting in the car. She had the sudden urge to tell Ian what happened with Lucas. How Debbie had shown up in his room. How she showed her pregnant belly.

  "Your mind is a giveaway," Ian finally said. "Whatever you feel for Lucas, you better settle it quick."

  Leah looked at Ian. He looked at her.

  She took a deep breath.

  "I'm not going to help you," Ian said. "I'm not taking you inside. I'm not taking you to bed."

  "I never said..."

  Ian leaned close to Leah and sniffed near her. "He's claimed to you, Leah. You need to understand that."

  "I don't understand that," Leah admitted.

  "You will. Soon."

  "Should I go back to him?"

  "I told you," Ian said, "I'm not helping you. "Just know you'll be safe inside your apartment. Protection will be offered by Full Moon Mercy. Lucas's order, I'm sure."

  "Can I at least thank you for the ride?" Leah asked.

&n
bsp; "Sounds like you just did."

  Leah opened the car door and before she could close it, Ian began to back up. She watched him drive away and then stood in the darkness of the parking lot to her apartment building. She felt watched but knew it was probably in her mind. After a few minutes, Leah heard the distant rumble of a motorcycle engine.

  Was that the protection?

  Leah didn't feel like sticking around outside to find out. She went into her apartment, shut the door, and locked it. She leaned against the door and put her hand to her chest. Her heart was still racing.

  Inside her bedroom, she looked at the mess of her bed. She fell to the bed and rolled herself in the sheets, smelling everything she and Lucas had done together. It couldn't just end. It couldn't just go away.

  Keeping herself wrapped up her sheets, Leah held her cell phone in her hand and closed her eyes.

  "Please, Lucas," she whispered. "I'm... falling in love with you. The man. The beast. Everything."

  *

  Lucas couldn't handle the sight of Debbie on his bed. He went into the bedroom and grabbed Debbie by the hair and lifted her from the bed. She let out a moan and smiled.

  "I love it rough," she whispered. "I'm already pregnant, so you can..."

  "No," Lucas said. "That's not how this works."

  "Then how does it work, baby?"

  "I'm not sure. If you are pregnant with my..."

  Debbie grabbed Lucas's hand and placed it to her stomach. She held her hand tight and looked at him, her lip curling in disgust.

  "I fuck a lot of guys," Debbie said. "But I stay safe in my own way. This is all you, Lucas, okay?"

  "How do you know?"

  "I was in the big office. With Mandy and Vincent."

  "Shit," Lucas said and shook his head.

  This was what Vincent wanted to talk about then. He wanted to tell Lucas of the pregnancy. Maybe a plan. But instead, he let Lucas walk right into the club with Leah, knowing Debbie was in his room.

  "It hurts a lot, Lucas," Debbie said. "And I've seen it move. It's too soon for that. It can't happen like that."

  "Then it's not mine."

  "Oh, it is. Mandy took me to her doctor, but once she saw it move she made me leave."

  Lucas thought about what to say next to Debbie. As he did, he felt something touch his hand. The touch made Lucas want to feel jittery but he couldn’t. His hand suddenly felt glued to Debbie’s belly. The touch along his palm wasn’t felt at his palm. It was felt throughout his entire body. Head to toe, his body felt like something had entered him. He slowly moved his stare from his hand on Debbie’s stomach to Debbie’s eyes. She wasn’t a true beauty, like Leah. She was sure as hell fun, willing to let Lucas lose his cool in the bedroom…

  “It can’t be,” he whispered.

  Debbie opened her mouth and the movement came again. This time Lucas watched the pain in Debbie’s eyes as it spread across her face. She started to hunch over and Lucas slowly dropped to his knees before Debbie’s stomach. His moved his hands to her sides, his thumbs gently moving up and down her stomach.

  Lucas wanted to see it now.

  He waited, gripping Debbie tight. He listened to her breath and moan, the pain obviously getting worse by the second. When he finally saw something press against Debbie’s stomach, he smiled. He didn’t smile because Debbie was in pain or because she was there. He smiled because he could feel it. He could really feel it. The life inside her stomach was his life. His creation.

  Lucas continued to move his thumbs and watched as the movement started to follow him. It was as though the life inside Debbie knew its father was present now.

  Just as fast as the movement came, it left. When it did, it seemed the pain went away also. As Lucas waited to see and feel more movement he felt Debbie touch his hair. Her fingers were long and skinny. Her nails cut through the knots in his hair with ease. She curled her fingers around the back of his head and then pulled at him, wanting his face against her stomach.

  Lucas lost himself for a moment as he came forward. His nose touched Debbie’s belly. He moved his nose up and down, nuzzling against Debbie’s stomach. He shut his eyes and wished it were Leah. The thought was wrong to have but it was Lucas’s thought to have. He felt the urge to kiss Debbie’s stomach but caught himself when he realized it was Debbie before him and not Leah. He hurried back to his feet and backed away from Debbie.

  “What’s wrong?” Debbie asked. “We’re going to have a baby together.”

  “No, we’re not,” Lucas said. “You don’t know…”

  “Are you going to give me the speech Vince did?” Debbie asked. “For the record he said he’d take care of me, not matter what.”

  Lucas felt anger swarm through his body. “I think you should go.”

  “I’m not allowed to go,” Debbie said.

  “Then get out of my fucking room. Find somewhere else to crash for now.”

  Debbie pulled her shirt down. Lucas looked and blinked a few times. Had her stomach gotten bigger in the last minute?

  He didn’t want to believe it for a second, but it was possible. It would all depend on…

  “Get out,” Lucas ordered again. “My bed is not yours to share with.”

  “But I guess my bed was good enough?” Debbie asked.

  Lucas opened his mouth, but he held off. He opened the door and waited for Debbie to leave. When she did, he watched her stroll down the hallway as though she owned the damn place.

  The scary part was that in some twisted way, Debbie right then was the most important person in Full Moon Mercy.

  23

  Lucas stood in his bedroom, the door open, and as he gazed around, he lost sight of everything and thought of everything at the same time. The seconds became minutes and when Lucas finally came back to reality, he almost wished he could have found himself in his bed, waking from a terrible nightmare. That wasn’t the case and it wouldn’t be the case. The reality was right in front of him.

  There was a potential war to wage with the Reckingdune crew. Lucas had taken claim to a human woman, Leah, who he couldn’t stop thinking about or wanting. And if that weren’t enough, now someone he’d slept with was pregnant.

  Some of it made sense, most of it didn’t.

  Lucas left his room to seek out Vince. Vince knew more than anyone else in the MC and with the possibility of Full Moon Mercy blood continuing within the crew and the pack, Lucas knew Vince would be carefully planning all of this out.

  As he walked by the bar, he purposely ignored anyone who tried to talk to him. It wasn’t out of disrespect, he was just focused. Nothing could distract Lucas now. He needed to figure this all out and settle it. He needed to get his hands back on Leah’s body and finish staking his claim to her. If Leah had been a shifter like Lucas, she would have already understood all this and welcomed him. But she was human, she didn’t understand the connection between lovers.

  Lucas opened the door to the conference room. A cloud of smoke hung in the air and Vince sat at the head of the table. Mandy stood next to him, dark and beautiful. A few of the guys sat at the table - including Seth, Nate, and Ethan. The meeting didn’t seem to be very important. The sight of Lucas stole all of Vince’s attention. With a head nod, the signal had been given for the room to clear out.

  As Seth, Nate, and Ethan walked by, they all hugged Lucas. When Mandy walked by she gently touched his shoulder and smiled at him.

  The conference room door shut, leaving only Lucas and Vince.

  Vince leaned back in his chair and nodded to Lucas’s vacant seat. Lucas walked and took to his seat, reaching for a cigarette. With Debbie around, the urge to smoke grew ten times over itself.

  “Look,” Vince said, “I didn’t think it would be right to have me tell you everything. If I had known you were going to be bringing someone else tonight…”

  Lucas took a deep drag and exhaled slowly. “Fair enough. Didn’t expect any of this.”

  Vince chuckled. “Did you forget how to read a
calendar, bro?”

  Lucas looked at Vince and raised an eyebrow. “What?”

  “Come on,” Vince said. “You think we just howl at the full moon every month? Like we’re some kind of creatures out of movies? There’s an entire cycle with the moon that only we know about, Lucas. You know about it.”

  “What’s your point, Vince?”

  “My point is that you spent the night with Debbie on a cycle change,” Vince said. “That means when you finished the job, you really finished the job. No form of birth control short or pulling out could have stopped what is now our reality.”

  “Our reality?”

  Vince slapped the table. “Of course this is our reality. There’s a half beast in that woman’s stomach. A human at that. She can’t handle it. She’s going to give birth in weeks, Lucas, not months. That’s not how it works for us.”

  “Weeks?”

  “Look at the calendar, son,” Vince said.

  Son.

  Lucas didn’t like it when Vince called him son. He wasn’t Vince’s son. Lucas considered himself nobody’s son and it was much easier to live life that way.

  “You’re telling me that all this is my fault,” Lucas said.

  “You fucked her,” Vince yelled. “Not me. I didn’t stick anything in that woman. This is all your fault. We have to tread very carefully here. If Debbie goes to a regular doctor…”

  Vince shook his head.

  “What?” Lucas asked. “What will happen?”

  “What do you think?” Vince asked. “She’ll be poked at. Made into a spectacle of. Best case scenario, she and the baby would be killed. It would cause a rift not just through Full Moon Mercy but all of the goddamn crews we support, and the goddamn crews we hate. This isn’t something to take lightly.”

  “So what do we do?” Lucas asked. “I can’t stand having her around here. She’s not going to end up with me. I’m not taking claim to her, Vince. I will not love her. I will protect her for the sake of the baby inside her, that’s it.”

  Vince slid his hand to Lucas and placed it on top of Lucas’s hand. “Would you care for the baby?”

  “If the baby is mine, yes,” Lucas said.

  “Would you allow the baby to live elsewhere? To be raised the right way? To learn if it was… like us?”