The Secret Wolf (A Full Moon Mercy Novel) (shifter / MC romance)

by Ana W. Fawkes

  “She’ll give birth to your child,” Leah said.

  “Yes. A child I’ve created. Perhaps a beast. But it’s the wrong woman. I believe that in my heart.”

  “Are you going to tell me now that I’m the right woman?”

  “Yes,” Lucas said. “You are the right woman. I want to claim you. Make you mine forever.”

  “Does that mean changing me?” Leah asked with her eyes flickering.

  “No,” Lucas said. “You’re a human.”

  “Then I’ll never be able to give you a child. Or a family. It’ll kill me, won’t it?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “It’ll hurt.”

  “Yes, it will. But we don’t need to talk about that right now. I haven’t fully claimed you yet.”

  “Maybe you should,” Leah said.

  “Don’t tease,” Lucas said. “You know what I can become.”

  Leah leaned up and kissed Lucas gently on the lips. “Then become it.”

  She backed away and folded her arms. Lucas stared in disbelief.

  “What?”

  “Do it,” Leah said. “Show me what you are again. Just you and me right here.”

  Lucas looked around. “I can’t. Not here. Not now.”

  “Do it for me,” Leah said. “You want to claim me. Then show me. I want to watch it happen.”

  “You already saw…”

  “I saw so much at once before,” Leah said. “Seeing Cooper as a wolf. Those men bleeding. Bullets flying. You jumping in the air. It was all so much. This is just you and me.”

  “You and me,” Lucas whispered.

  “You want to give me all your secrets,” Leah said. “Prove it right now to me.”

  Lucas had never felt strong-armed by another person before, especially a woman. No woman would ever push him into a corner, except the one he’d give his heart to. That was Leah.

  Lucas looked down at himself. Leah wasn’t afraid of him. She wasn’t afraid of the beast he was or the beasts he called brothers. He thought of how Ian mentioned Leah seeing Cooper covered in blood.

  “Did it scare you to see Cooper when he returned?” Lucas asked.

  “The blood did,” Leah said. “But only because I thought for a second he was hurt. Like with you when you came from the woods.”

  “Not the idea of him as a beast? Not the idea of him as a killer?”

  Leah shook her head. “I see death all the time. I see good people suffer from disease. I see miserable people live to be a hundred, wishing they were dead. I have no reason to be afraid.”

  Lucas shook his head. Leah was real. The realest woman he’d ever met in his life. It scared him how much he cared for her, and it scared him for what he was about to do for her.

  “Please stand back,” he whispered.

  Leah dropped her arms and swallowed hard. She slowly stepped back. Lucas looked into her eyes. He sensed a little fear, but not nearly as much as he sensed her desire to see him shift.

  Lucas put himself into a corner and closed his eyes. He took a few deep breaths, calling for the change to happen. In the heat of battle or the heat of a moment, shifting just happened. It was more instinctive than a calling.

  To change now, he needed to channel his passion for Leah. He pictured her nude. He pictured her perfect body. He smelled her, everywhere. Then he thought of the Reckingdune crew. The danger and war all around him. The pressure from the club. The love that was growing for Leah. The background noise that Debbie brought and would continue to bring.

  When Lucas opened his eyes and stepped forward, he saw Leah and then began to shift. To him it always happened fast, his body perfecting the change so that everything happened at once for the sake of saving time when in the middle of a fight. His heart grew and forced his chest to grow. The extra muscles and blood flow then went to work on his arms and legs. His clothing fell from his body as his human flesh became a rippling beast. He shook his head and suddenly found himself on all four paws, crouched, his muscles tense, his senses even more heightened than normal.

  He blinked and stared at Leah.

  He wanted to speak to her, but he preferred not to confuse her with his purpose as a man and as a beast. This wasn’t to be used for enjoyment. Becoming a beast was about survival and necessity.

  “You’re huge,” Leah finally said.

  Lucas nodded his head. Of course he was huge. The ability to grow his heart so fast and provide so much blood to his body allowed him to become as large as he did.

  “You can understand me?” Leah asked.

  Lucas nodded.

  “Can… can you talk to me?”

  Lucas blinked. It would have been much easier to lie, but he didn’t want to base his relationship off lies. So he nodded again.

  “You’re not going to talk to me,” Leah said. “I understand. Can I touch you?”

  Lucas shook his head.

  Leah put her hands out and then made fists. She dropped her hands to her sides. She began to walk, slowly, looking at all of Lucas’s beastly features. He stood his guard, needing to protect Leah but also needing to protect himself. The silence in the apartment gave way to the sound of Lucas’s heavy breathing. To some it may have sounded like he was panting and growing short of air. For Lucas, the heavy breaths were needed to provide blood and oxygen to his entire body. He needed to be ready to lunge without the notice of a second. He needed to be able to run. The pounce. To attack. To feast.

  The words came at Lucas faster than he anticipated. He shut his eyes to calm himself. As a beast, the urges and instinctive needs were much harder to push away than as a human. As a beast, emotions took a backseat to everything else. Yet, when he opened his eyes and looked at Leah, he felt it. He felt true emotion for her.

  “I can’t believe this,” Leah said. “I mean, I can. I’ve seen it before. But like this… Lucas, you’re… amazing…”

  Lucas exhaled a breath with a small growl.

  “I don’t care,” Leah said. “You’re not going to scare me. I can’t believe this is who you are. You’re beautiful. As a man…” Leah looked at Lucas. “As a beast.”

  Leah put a hand out and reached for Lucas. Lucas watched her fingertips move closer and closer, just inches away from touching him. He couldn’t allow this to happen. There could never be confusion as to what Lucas was or why.

  The very tip of Leah’s fingers grazed the fur on Lucas’s body. He then crouched back and jumped to his back paws. He threw his head back and let out a growl as he ordered his body to shift. There was no threat nor danger, there was no need to be a wolf at that moment.

  Lucas kept his eyes shut and took heavy, fast breaths. He did it over and over… and over and over… and over and over…

  When he felt Leah’s hand touch his chest, his eyes opened and he looked at her. He grabbed for her left shoulder and tried to stop himself, knowing that his massive paw would tear her to shreds in a matter of seconds. Instead of hurting Leah, he saw his hand - his human hand - on her shoulder.

  “It’s okay,” Leah whispered. “You’re you again.”

  Lucas took a deep breath and looked down. He was himself, his human form again. He was naked, standing with Leah.

  Leah’s hand rested on his chest. “Your heart is…”

  “That’s how it works,” Lucas said. “The heart.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “I don’t know,” Lucas said. “Do you understand everything I’ve told you? Shown you?”

  “Yes,” Leah whispered. “I understand.”

  Lucas slid his hand from her shoulder up to her face. The feel of her skin against his hands sent shivers through his body. Being with Leah made Lucas want to stay human forever. He’d give it all up to be with her.

  “You can finish claiming me,” Leah said. “I accept it all.”

  “That’s not quite how it works,” Lucas said. “Maybe soon, Leah. We still have to get through so much right now. None of it should matter to you. You didn’t cause any problems, Leah.
”

  “I won’t walk away from you,” Leah said. “You saved my life. You protected me. You touched me in a way I’ve never been touched before. I won’t walk away because I can’t. I’m… I’m addicted to you, Lucas.”

  Lucas turned his head. Of course she felt that way, he had taken claim to her. Leah had no idea what she was feeling or what to do with it. If Lucas had known about Debbie before all this, he would have spared Leah the road before her now. But when he looked at her again, there was no stopping it.

  Leah kissed Lucas and he didn’t stop her. Her hand found comfort between his legs, gripping and stroking his thickness, making him harder by the second. Lucas then lifted Leah and carried her to the bedroom. He tore at her clothing, kissing her with each second allowed to do so. He’d never felt so in need before. And Leah just knew how to act. She knew just when to take her hand off Lucas’s body. She knew just when to get on the bed and open her legs. She prepared herself for Lucas as he came forward at her with a passion that perhaps should have scared her. But it didn’t. Nothing scared Leah. Lucas entered Leah with a deep, satisfying thrust. There he rested, his arms locked as he hovered over Leah’s body. Her hands were on his chest, shaking and clawing.

  “Tell me what you’re thinking right now,” Lucas ordered.

  His muscles were tense. He needed to pull out of Leah and thrust again. And again. And again. He saved himself until he heard what she had to say.

  “I want it to never end,” Leah said. “The feeling inside me. You inside me. I never want it to end.”

  That was the answer that Lucas needed to hear.

  With that spoken, Leah had just made it known she wanted to be claimed by Lucas.

  He began to love her, knowing that outside the apartment, all around Full Moon Mercy, blood was boiling and wars were being prepared to begin.

  25

  Lucas didn’t sleep much because he didn’t need much sleep. He prepared to hold Leah and listen to her breathe. He touched her soft skin, caressed her hair, and smelled her. He memorized every inch of her and allowed every passing second to become a lasting memory. Through the small cracks between the blinds he saw the amber glow of the morning sunrise. Another day had come. Humans were always able to plan for their futures. Some were able to plan a week out, some were set on years out. Some people even created large plans for themselves that included careers, money, houses, cars, marriage, and kids. For Lucas, with the animal instinct of a wolf, his plan was to survive the morning, the afternoon, and the night. Each day brought its own set of challenges to face.

  With the morning upon the town of Mercy, Lucas already considered it a good day with Leah in his arms. She slept soundly, even through her phone ringing several times. The same number called her over and over, leaving a total of four messages. Lucas even caught himself drifting back into sleep, but when he did, he saw the visions of nightmares. He heard screams and cries and through what looked like a dark tunnel he saw blood. He heard the sound of ripping flesh. He heard the sound of last breaths.

  His eyes popped open and one name came to mind…

  Vince.

  Lucas sat up and it shook the entire bed, waking Leah. Her beautiful eyes opened and looked at him. The blankets were just barely covering her nipples, leaving plenty to see and plenty to tempt Lucas with.

  “What’s wrong?” Leah asked.

  “Your phone kept ringing. I need to be somewhere.”

  Lucas rushed from the bed and found his clothing near the front door of the apartment. That’s where his clothes had landed the night before when Leah asked him to shift. By the time he dressed, Leah came walking down the hall with a robe covering her body.

  “Everything okay?” Lucas asked.

  “That was my boss,” Leah said. “I was supposed to be at work today.”

  “Oh. Sorry.”

  “I’m not. I can’t handle it over there. Can I… I mean, if you ever needed me…”

  “What?” Lucas asked. Each time he blinked, he saw visions. He saw guns, fists, paws, claws, and fangs. It was almost too much to handle.

  “You said something about a special doctor for Debbie,” Leah said. “If you ever needed help with her. I have experience… I’ve seen a lot of stuff.”

  Lucas rushed to Leah. He took her by hands. Holding her hands made him feel better, but not by much.

  “Leah, listen to me. I need you stay right here.”

  “Something’s wrong.”

  “I’ll come to you before the day is over. I promise. But it’s important you stay right here. Spend the day in bed even. Don’t worry about your boss and your job right now. I’ll take care of whatever you need financially.”

  “I wouldn’t ask that…”

  “I wouldn’t expect you to ask,” Lucas said. “But I’m going to take care of you. Just trust me.”

  Lucas kissed Leah, keeping it simple. Anything more and he would have been tempted to stay and forget about what was happening outside.

  The moment Lucas stepped outside the apartment, he could smell it in the air. His eyes looked to the southern mountains of Mercy and he growled. It would have been easier and quicker to just shift right there and charge as a wolf. His speed and strength was much greater than that of a motorcycle. Lucas knew he couldn’t act irrationally. It was bad enough he had taken claim to a human woman and had gotten another woman pregnant.

  Lucas started the motorcycle and rode off.

  The ride was comfortable and cool. The feelings within himself were anything but. It was a long time ago when Vince had begun to speak to Lucas of making his claim to Lucas as a son. At that time, Lucas was too young to really understand what the bond between father and son actually meant. It seemed more of a gesture from Vince to Lucas, a symbol and way of showing love. Lucas loved Vince very much. He wasn’t sure if he loved the man as a father because Lucas wasn’t sure what that love actually felt like.

  But never before had Lucas been able to sense something happening to Vince. This went beyond some nightmare that Lucas had in Leah’s bed. This was real. There was a connection between he and Vince. Lucas sped through the streets of Mercy, blasting through stop signs and red lights. Luck was on side and kept him from causing an accident and from getting pulled over. It seemed strange that no police were present. The town had an eerie feel to it. It was too quiet. Like the calm before the storm.

  When Lucas began to descend the mountain, he considered dumping the bike and shifting. He stayed on his motorcycle and just before the top of the mountain, he came around a bend to find the scene he’d been waiting to find.

  There was a small black car on the side of the road. Two men sat on the hood of the car. They looked nervous and very jittery. Lucas stopped his bike and got off. He began to walk toward the car, sensing the scene was going to turn ugly and fast. He could smell the men. They were junkies. They were high and looking for another score. The scene looked just like the mess from before. The Reckingdune crew were still luring people to the mountain to die.

  “Hey!” Lucas called out.

  The men jumped from the hood. Their hands were in their pockets as they walked toward Lucas.

  “Who are you?” one asked.

  “Who the fuck are you? Looking for a little score here?”

  The man on the left pulled out a handgun and pointed it at Lucas.

  Of course it would come down to this.

  Lucas didn’t back down from a gun. He never would. By the time a bullet dared to reach him, he could shift into a wolf and the bullet would do nothing.

  “Fuck you,” the man with the gun said.

  “Fuck you,” Lucas said.

  “Fuck everybody,” another voice said. Lucas watched in surprise as Vince walked from the woods with a shotgun pointed at the two men. “Why don’t you two assholes drop your weapons?”

  “Weapons?” the man with the gun said. “Why don’t I blast this guy’s head off?”

  Vince continued to walk and Lucas saw another shotgun in his left h
and. He tossed it into the air and when Lucas caught it, he pumped it and pointed it at the two men.

  “Fuck,” the man with the gun said.

  “Fuck is right,” Lucas said. “Drop the fucking guns. Now.”

  “Okay, okay,” the man said. “It’s all good, brother.”

  The two men placed two handguns on the ground. Lucas glanced at Vince and Vince gave a nod. Lucas recruited the men back to their car. He reached into the car and took the keys from the ignition. He then ordered them to the backseat and stood with the shotgun pointed at them.

  “Vince, what are you doing?” he asked.

  “I could ask you the same,” Vince said.

  “I sensed it,” Lucas said. “I felt something was wrong. I came looking for you.”

  “I have a little meeting planned,” Vince said. He smiled and dropped his shotgun to the ground.

  “A meeting…”

  Before Lucas could say another word Lucas felt the ground rumbling under his feet. Something was running right toward them. He kept his senses keen, the shotgun on the men in the back of the car, his eyes and nose sensing everything else around him. A large wolf blasted from the trees, lunging off its four paws and landing in the middle of the road. This brought screams of surprise from the men in the back of the car.

  It didn’t bother Lucas or Vince.

  “Right on time,” Vince said as he reached into his leather jacket and pulled out a cigar.

  The massive wolf looked at Vince, then Lucas, then the men in the back of the car. The wolf’s eyes were desperate with hunger. The beast took a few steps toward the car and Vince put his left hand out and snapped his fingers.

  “Let’s not make this any harder than it’s going to be,” Vince said.

  The wolf looked at Vince and bared its teeth. Vince lit his cigar and smiled. The wolf then jumped back into a crouched position, the muscles of its legs thick and ready to attack. The wolf didn’t attack though. Instead, the creature stood on its back paws and became a man. A tall man, standing nude in the middle of the road. The man took heavy breaths and had his hands balled into fists.