BOSS

by Ashley John

“Here, right now, with me.”

  That was easy to answer.

  “Because I want to be.”

  They sat in silence again. The people behind them were trying to calm a woman who was having a panic attack at the back. She’d been screaming about their impending death since the ride stopped but Joshua had tried to tune out from it.

  “If you want to drag me through the courts, fine, but -,”

  “I don’t,” Joshua jumped in, “I did, but I don’t. I don’t know what I want anymore.”

  Ezra had the life Bill Silverton had wanted for Joshua but Joshua had never wanted it. Seeing Ezra in the position had awoken a fire in his belly. That fire wanted to prove something to his dad. Did he want to stick his middle finger up, or did he want to step up to the plate?

  “I’m not your enemy,” said Ezra, “there are people who want to see me fall but I hope you’re not one of them.”

  Ezra’s words were only confusing him further. Why does he have to keep saying all of the right things?

  “I’m still left with nothing,” Joshua mumbled, almost to himself, “and Levi is bugging me about flights. I feel like I’m a spider trapped in a glass and the air is getting thinner and thinner and -,”

  With a groan and a shudder, the ride suddenly started moving. Without any warning, they plummeted to earth the only way they could. Everything was a blur as they were dragged up, down, left and right. Joshua didn’t know which way was up or down. Terrified screams from the people behind him sounded like they didn’t trust the ride but Joshua was secretly enjoying the thrill of the danger.

  They were riding on the edge; they were playing with fire and it seemed to be a new hobby of Joshua’s.

  They groaned into the station and the brakes screeched to a halt. Representatives from the company were there to offer sincere apologises with a promise of a free day pass for another visit if they signed a waver. Most people signed but Joshua and Ezra grabbed their things and walked back through the now empty line. Before they reached the gate, which was now blocking off the closed ride, Ezra stopped.

  “I’ll make you head of research,” he said, the fire Joshua loved in his eyes, “you’ll get a proper salary. I don’t care about what’s happened. I don’t care about lawyers and contracts, I just want you to promise me one thing.”

  The thought of staying in London in a real job was scarier than being trapped on a roller-coaster one hundred feet above the ground. It was even scarier that it was in the one company he vowed to never be a part of. The thrill he’d felt when he impressed the Chinese businessmen with his designs had been better than the thrill he felt when he stepped off a plane in an unknown country. The truth was, he was tired of running. Tired of pretending he didn’t think about his future. Tired of pretending he didn’t care.

  “What’s the catch?” Joshua nervously ran his hand through his beard, not sure if he wanted to know.

  “Stay in London,” Ezra’s hand cupped Joshua’s cheek, pulling him in, “don’t leave.”

  Joshua didn’t know what to say. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing. He didn’t want to tell Ezra a lie. The pull of the airport was all he knew. Running is all I know.

  “I don’t know,” Joshua’s voice quivered as Ezra pulled him in closer – Why does he smell so damn good all of the time?

  “Just say yes,” his hazel eyes darted down to Joshua’s lips, “because for the first time in a long time, I’ve found something I don’t want to lose.”

  He lost control of all thoughts or senses. He listened to the uncomfortable writhing in his stomach. He pushed his lips against Ezra’s as he slowly closed his lids, the sun lighting up the network of blood red veins.

  The airport, Levi, his father, they all left him alone for that moment because all he wanted was the man in front of him.

  When they opened the door to Violet’s house it was in total darkness and Ezra wasn’t wholly sure what he was walking into. They both walked towards the kitchen and Joshua mumbled under his breath that this was typical Violet meddling.

  “You’re early!” she cried as she slid what looked like Hunters Chicken onto two plates.

  Two plates.

  “Vi, it’s half past seven, we’re late,” he held out the bag with the bear inside, “got you a souvenir though.”

  Squinting at the clock on the oven, she shook her blonde hair over her shoulder and waved her hands in apology. Accepting the bag without even looking inside, she told them to wait for her in the dining room. Ezra followed Joshua through the house as he flicked lamps on.

  He opened the oak door to the dining room and the strongest smell of vanilla hit his senses. Candles dotted the room, casting flickering shadows into every dark corner.

  Only two places were set.

  “I’m gonna kill her,” Joshua spat through gritted teeth, “what is she playing at?”

  Leaving Ezra alone in the dining room, he stormed back to the kitchen. The room was small but exquisitely decorated. A table fit for a dozen people filled most of the room. Tall, slender candles ran along the middle with the two place mats.

  A bottle of white wine sat between two empty glasses. Knowing that he’d need a drink, Ezra snatched up the bottle, ignoring the glasses. He cracked the seal and tasted the wine. It was nice, excellent in fact – That woman has good taste in wine and strawberries.

  He heard raised voices and he turned towards the door but it didn’t sound like they were going to come back any time soon. Something silver and flickering caught Ezra’s eye in the dancing candlelight. He wouldn’t have thought anything of it because the entire room was flickering and shining at him, but it was something he recognised.

  The Silverton Industries logo.

  It was embossed into a thin, leather folder with a candle in the middle of it. Pulling it out from under the candle, he listened out. He heard Joshua say something about interfering and something about Violet just trying to help.

  Keeping one eye on the door, he opened the folder and his heart stopped. It was Bill Silverton’s will. He wouldn’t have thought anything of it but when he flicked to the last page, the date caught his eye.

  March 24th, 2014.

  He knew the date and he knew what he was looking at but he didn’t know how it had gone from the boardroom safe to Violet’s dining room cabinet.

  Two sets of shoes in the hall made him snap the folder shut. Before the door opened, he quickly replaced the candle and leaned his hand against the table.

  “As it turns out,” Violet squeezed through them with the two plates in her hands, “I have a thing I need to do, so it looks like it’s just you two.”

  “Shame,” Ezra looked over her shoulder to Joshua.

  “There’s a strawberry gateau in the fridge,” she slapped Joshua on the chest, “Marks and Spencer’s too.”

  She left them alone and with it, she left an awkward silence.

  “I’m sorry about this -,”

  “It’s fine,” Ezra cut him off, “God knows why she thinks she needs to do this, but it’s sweet. She cares about you.”

  “She cares about herself. She’s just trying to bribe me to stay and you’re just a pawn in her game.”

  “Games,” Ezra’s eyes darted to the folder, “takes two to play them.”

  “We can ditch this if you want,” Joshua hooked his thumb over his shoulder, “if you have somewhere to be?”

  Ezra didn’t have anywhere to be. The only place he wanted to be was with Joshua. He wanted to spend time with him and he wanted some answers.

  “I’m all yours,” Ezra turned and poured them both glasses of wine.

  Joshua turned on a lamp and blew out a couple of the candles. They both sat at the table and made small talk about the food. It was a situation neither of them seemed comfortable in. Ezra Steele didn’t do ‘dates’ and it didn’t seem like Joshua did either.

  “So, you come here often?” Ezra sipped his wine.

  “First time,” he played along, “although I won’t be comin
g back. I hear the owner is an interfering witch.”

  “Quite,” Ezra winked, “she’s just trying to help.”

  “Well, I don’t need it,” he mumbled through a mouthful of chicken, “I wish people would leave me alone to make up my own mind about things.”

  Did that include Ezra? Was he talking about his question at Thorpe Park? He hadn’t answered it, he’d just kissed him. Ezra had assumed that was a yes but now, he wasn’t so sure. They spent the rest of the day enjoying the rides, rather than talking about business. It was fun and carefree but now Ezra needed the answers.

  “Do you want me to leave you alone?” Ezra made sure to look him dead in the eye when he asked that question.

  “No,” he answered straight away, “I just wish it was all easier.”

  “Life isn’t easy.”

  “I’m learning that,” he huffed out his chest, “is it always this crazy?”

  “Not always,” Ezra shook his head, “there’s good stuff too.”

  “Like?”

  Did he really need everything explained to him?

  “Like, what we have,” Ezra sipped the wine, trying to keep it as casual as possible, “what I hope we can have.”

  Joshua picked up some of the steamed vegetables, cramming as much as he could into his mouth. Ezra knew it was so he could avoid talking for a couple of minutes while chewing as he thought where to take things.

  “You’re an arrogant show off and you wind me up so much,” Joshua swallowed.

  “You’re amazing as well.”

  “Just listen,” Joshua arched an eyebrow, “you’re all those things, but you’re also in my head. You’re under my skin, you’re -,”

  “In your pants?”

  Joshua dropped his knife and fork, giving Ezra ‘do you really have to always take it there?’ eyes.

  “If it was as simple as sex, I’d know the answer.”

  “The answer to what? You’re always so vague.”

  He watched as Joshua gulped down the wine. How could a grown man be reduced to avoiding everything about his life? Ezra thought he had that in the bag but Joshua would win first prize in any contest.

  “The questions keep changing,” he shrugged and leaned back in the chair, using his nails to pick food out of his teeth, “strawberry gateau?”

  “I haven’t even finished this yet,” Ezra poked the chicken, which was dry, despite the sticky sauce it was covered in.

  “Yeah, but this is shit,” Joshua laughed, poking his own chicken, “Violet has many talents but cooking isn’t one of them.”

  Joshua disappeared before Ezra could agree with him. A couple of minutes later, he returned with a gateau in one hand, two spoons and cream in the other and a bowl crammed under each arm.

  “You could have called for help,” Ezra watched his struggle to let go of everything.

  “I don’t need help,” he dropped one of the bowls, quickly catching it again, “I have everything under control.”

  He sat down and dished up two huge servings of the gateau, smothering it in double cream. They sat eating Violet’s Marks and Spencer’s strawberry creation, catching eyes across the table.

  “I think this is our second strawberry encounter,” Ezra pulled the spoon from his mouth, “I think they’re becoming our thing.”

  Joshua plucked a fat strawberry out of the sticky sauce. He tossed it across the table and it landed messily in Ezra’s lap, right next to his zip. Leaning over the table, Joshua looked down at it with a smirk on his face.

  “You could always clean it up,” Ezra leaned back, “with your tongue?”

  Joshua laughed off the suggestion, even if Ezra was being slightly serious. Sex would take his mind off the will, which was only a couple of feet away. He wanted to know how Joshua got it and what he thought it meant.

  “Do you want to come to the wedding on Saturday?” he said instead.

  “I’m not invited,” Ezra dropped the strawberry into his mouth, “besides, I’m sorting through my porn collection on Saturday.”

  “I’m inviting you,” Joshua narrowed his eyes as he scratched the side of his beard, “she’s given me a plus one.”

  He was trying so hard to stay casual but it sounded like it had been a question sitting on his mind for a while. How could Ezra turn him down when he was being so adorable?

  “Like your date?”

  “Like my plus one,” Joshua’s eyes turned to slits.

  “I guess I can squeeze it in,” Ezra nodded carefully, “should we wear matching suits.”

  Joshua picked another strawberry out, dunking it in the cream first. He tossed it at Ezra but this time, it landed on his collar.

  “This time,” Ezra leaned back and pointed to it, “you’re cleaning it up and I don’t want any fucking stains.”

  “Make me,” Joshua tossed his arms out, a mischievous smile on his face.

  Ezra wanted to so badly but the leather folder was whispering to him. Should he ignore it? Should he question Joshua? Do I want to ruin the mood?

  “Are you and Tobias cooking up a crazy scheme? Should I be worried?”

  He could tell the question was expected but unwanted. Joshua dropped the spoon into the bowl and leaned back on the back two legs of his chair as his eyes wandered out of the window and into his cousin’s garden.

  “Tobias wants me to,” he rested the back of the chair against the wall, his arms on his stomach.

  “What do you want?”

  Joshua gave a small shrug and it made Ezra believe that he was truly confused. If he was planning something, he was doing a good job of throwing Ezra off the scent and Ezra was a pretty damn good judge of character.

  I don’t have to worry about him, which means I can enjoy him.

  “Is there anything stronger than wine?” Ezra pushed his chair back and stood up, “This stuff isn’t touching the sides.”

  Joshua seemed to like the change of tone because he too jumped up and headed straight for the door. Ezra followed him through to the living room and Joshua produced a bottle of whiskey from a drinks globe in the corner.

  “Is this strong enough for you?” he shook the bottle and it caught the moonlight in the dark room.

  The gold lettering twinkled and it was a logo Ezra had seen many times before, “Jonnie Walker Blue. That was your -,”

  “Yeah,” Joshua cut him off as he poured it into two crystal tumblers, “my dad’s favourite.”

  He handed the glass to Ezra and he felt like a fool for even mentioning it. Of course he’d know that. It was the drink Bill would always produce when business meetings were taking a wrong turn. Ezra had never been sure if it was to tempt the other men or to convince Bill it wasn’t going so bad.

  “I never liked whiskey,” Joshua sipped it, “but I find myself appreciating it more since I got back.”

  “That happens with age. One day you wake up and you suddenly don’t like the crap you were drinking when you were a kid. What was it, White Lightening on a park bench?”

  “Does that look like me?” Joshua settled in the sofa, the room still in darkness, “Me and Vi used to take whatever we wanted from my dad’s stash. He either didn’t notice or he didn’t care. We were those kids at the parties with Grey Goose vodka when everybody else was drinking Smirnoff.”

  “I was drinking Smirnoff,” Ezra raised his glass in the air, “but look at me now.”

  They both laughed. They had both travelled in opposite directions to get where they were but it felt like they were both at the same place in their lives. Ready for a change and ready for something new.

  “I never liked whiskey because it was what he drank,” Joshua circled his finger around the rim of the glass as it glittered in the moonlight, “most nights, he’d lock himself in his study at home with a bottle of Jonnie Walker Blue and that was it. I wouldn’t see him until the morning when he was going to the tower.”

  “I never knew my dad.”

  It wasn’t something he told people. It was something he’d tu
rned into a fact so he could detach himself from it. He didn’t want to be bothered that his mum had never bothered to narrow it down from the list of suspects.

  “I can’t really say I knew mine either,” Joshua sipped the drink, “after my mum – well – we just went in different directions. I think we both hit self destruct but mine took me around the world -,”

  “And his took him to Silverton Tower,” Ezra was finally starting to get it.

  “Exactly,” he nodded, “now I don’t have any parents. I just have Violet. What about your mum?”

  A slow and deep chuckle left Ezra’s throat. The less said about mother dearest, the better.

  “She’s a drunk and a whore,” he said the words lightly, “I don’t think she ever wanted children, we were just a bi-product of her mistakes. When I was about fifteen, she looked me in the eye and she said ‘Ezra, you were a split condom’. I told her she should have bought more expensive ones and she agreed. I moved out soon after that. Felix is seven years younger than me, so he was only a kid but the second he wised up, she kicked him out and he came to me.”

  “Shit -,” Joshua sighed, “I had no idea.”

  “Why would you?” he attempted to shrug it off, “I don’t talk about it. I don’t even know why I told you. I’ve already told you more than I’ve told anyone and -,”

  Joshua took the glass from Ezra’s tight grip and put it on the floor with his own. Half of his face was in complete shadow as he turned to face him but that didn’t stop his piercing blue eyes shining in the dark.

  “I got you wrong,” he said, “there’s more to you than just sex and suits.”

  “Is there?” Ezra straightened up his tie, “I want to know who’s spreading these vicious lies.”

  Joshua smirked, lowering his eyes to Ezra’s lips. Almost like a reaction, Ezra licked them as he felt his heart start to tremble. As Joshua closed his eyes and leaned in, he felt a weight lift from his shoulders.

  When their lips connected, Ezra felt himself slowly falling back into the couch. Joshua’s fingers fumbled with the tie around Ezra’s neck, ripping it out so he could work on the buttons. He exposed Ezra’s chest and his kisses started to direct their way down his body. It was awkward and inexperienced, as if he wanted to kiss every part of him all at once. That innocence instantly turned Ezra on.