by Emily Bowie
“I heard Ms. Mayberry just fell into a bunch of new money from her divorce. You could easily get her to do it.” The words are out of my mouth before I can rethink them. I’m just looking to punish myself it seems like.
“Well, as I mentioned to your folks, I’m going to have to be available more at home. Not sure how long I’m going to keep bull riding as a career. It’s not like it’s stable, and unless you’re in it to win the whole thing, sponsors only pay enough to get to the event. That doesn’t leave much money for living.”
“You got to number fifty-one last year. I thought you’ve been climbing up the rankings?”
“To make any money, I need to be top ten. I need to start thinking about my future, and I’m not sure if bull riding is the way to go.”
This was all new to me. I hadn’t realized his parents needed so much help he’d have to give up his dream. I just assumed when he talked about staying around to help that he only meant when he was in town. Not that he would stay in town because of it.
“I can help your parents.” This seems like a simple fix. “Is that why you were in town this weekend and not gone?” I hadn’t expected Danger to show up today with a petting zoo. We never talked about dinner at my parents’ after we left last week, or me wanting to do something for the kids. Danger has no time to respond as I continue talking a mile a minute. “I thought you were going to be gone more than ever this year. It’s all you talked about at the end of last season. I’d hate for you to give up a dream.”
“It’s not your place to help. It’s my job. I’m the oldest in the family. I’m the man. It’s my job.” His response is clipped and to the point. His jaw tics like it does when he becomes frustrated. I had no idea this was a prickly subject for him.
“But I can help,” I urge, challenging him. There is no reason for him to be pigheaded about this. I’m here, available. Why not use help when it’s offered to you?
“Drop it, Haven. I want to enjoy our night, not talk about a bunch of what-ifs.” The look he wields in my direction shows he’s unwilling to continue this conversation. He can be so closed off to ideas that aren’t his that I wish I could shake him to knock sense into him.
When he glances toward me, I try to mirror his expression, wanting to stand up to him, prove to him that a little help can go a long way. Hell, I bet more than half the church would come help if they knew he needed it. I want to keep talking about this, because it doesn’t make sense. What on earth happened to make him change his mind in what seems like overnight?
The air is thick in the cab of the truck, making me fidget. I keep stealing glances over at him when I think he won’t notice. His jaw is set, and he looks mad. We’re silent except for his heavy breathing. His fingers keep flexing around the steering wheel. It’s as if he’s imaging holding onto the rope before the bull leaps from the chute to buck for those eight endless seconds.
Sighing, I know this Danger too well. We’re sliding close to that hate area of our relationship. He can’t be pushed; it’s not physically possible. Once he’s made up his mind, nothing else matters.
“You can stop staring at me.” His voice is softer than normal. I hadn’t realized I was still staring. Looking around, I realize we’re parked in the public beach parking lot.
“You finally going to let me teach you how to surf?” I tease, trying to cut the tension between us.
“Naw.” He chuckles, and the coiling stiffness in my body relaxes. “Something better.” He nods out toward the darkness of the beach.
Nine
Haven
The early summer breeze blows strong off the ocean, allowing loose tendrils of my hair to escape the messy ponytail I have created. The night is dark, making the ocean impossible to see. Danger takes my hand, and the heaviness from the truck escapes into the wide-open spaces. This isn’t the first time he’s taken my hand, it feels different. Our fingers are interlocked; his thumb brushing softly over the pulse point of my wrist. The small comforting act has my heart beating a faster pace. With each sandy sunken step I take, butterflies start to invade my excited stomach.
“Close your eyes.” I nearly jump at his voice at my ear. I swear I can feel the tip of his nose brushing against my neck, but then it’s gone so fast I could have imagined it.
His loose hand slides down my face, closing my eyes for me. His pine scent invades my personal space. In this instant, I want Danger to kiss me. Not because he wants to comfort me, but because he just needs to have a taste. Because he can’t get me out of his system.
I can sense lights all of a sudden, and it takes all my willpower not to peek.
“Don’t open yet.” His hot breath feathers across my lips.
His hands lead me a few more steps. What on earth has Danger planned? The excitement of it all has a genuine smile splayed across my face, forcing me to push aside the memory of my tears that slid down my face less than an hour ago.
“Duck down.” Slowly and cautiously, I feel the ground, moving carefully before my fingertips touch something soft and padded. What feels like pillows and a blanket are under my feet as I shift my crouched body into a sitting position.
“Ready?”
The anticipation is killing me. Danger doesn’t go out of his way like this for people. Nodding, I wait for him to say something. I can feel his body close to mine. It zaps mine fully awake, and my heart has grown a mind of its own, beating hard against my chest. With each quick thump, it seems to be healing my bruised chest cavity instead of harming it further.
“Open.”
My jaw drops, seeing little lights around our blankets on the sand. The lights are faint but give enough illumination to see around our small area. Tied above is a white sheet pulled tightly, with one of my favorite movies of all time, Leap Year, projected on it, its opening scene frozen.
“This is incredible.” There are no other words for it. My eyes prickle with wetness, but this time, for the first time in weeks, it’s not because I’m sad. I don’t remember the last time I cried because I was happy.
“You like it?” Danger asks, looking much like the young boy I once knew. His face holds a vulnerability I forgot he had.
“This is beyond perfect.” I still can’t believe my eyes.
“It took me longer than expected to set it up, and I had to wait till it got dark enough to see the movie.”
“Thank you.” I hold his eyes. “This is exactly what I needed.”
His eyes shift to my lips then back to mine. My heart whips around like a lasso, with each lash echoing in my ears. Can he hear it too?
“I’ll press Play.” Lying down beside me, he looks up to the screen as I take my spot next to him.
It’s hard to focus knowing he’s so close to me. Our arms touch each other, his fingers accidentally slipping across my legs. Each of my breaths matches his. When I’m not looking up at the screen, I’m stealing glances at him out of the corner of my eye. He watches intently like this is one of his favorite movies too. Only I know better. He only watches this with me, when I force him to.
Our bodies naturally come closer together, like magnetic poles being attracted to one another. Internally, I blame it on the sand pushing us together. Our arms are now resting together, our fingers slightly overlapping with each other. I might have a heart attack if my pulse doesn’t slow down.
His thumb starts sweeping in small circles on top of my hand.
“You watching any of this?” he asks me, still looking up at the screen.
“I’ve seen it a thousand times.” I keep my eyes on the screen like he is.
I can feel his body shift. Turning my head, I see he’s on his side, his head resting on his hand.
“Can I tell you something?”
I don’t know if I want him to.
Rolling to my side, I mimic his position. There’s no space between us. No one to interrupt this moment, no one to knock some sense into either of us.
“What?” I try to steady my voice. This moment echoes the emotions
of four years ago. If he changes things tonight, I’m not sure I can ever go back to the way things are. The first time around it was hard to pretend the lines between friends and more than friends had never been crossed. A second time might kill me.
“Promise you won’t get mad?”
The way he’s staring at me so intently sends a shiver down my body. I can stop this right now, and we can be the same Haven and Danger.
I don’t want to.
For once, I want to be reckless with my heart. I’m tired of playing it safe. What if safe isn’t what I need? What if Danger is what I need to start living my life? “Promise.”
He takes a deep breath. “Remember when you came crying to me, because Aiden broke up with you saying you were bad at sex?”
How could a girl forget? I thought Aiden was my first love. But he didn’t make it a week past me sleeping with him. I was crushed, beyond devastated.
“I try not to remember.” A pang of hurt seeps in, even from all those years ago.
“Do you remember what you asked me?”
I have to chuckle. “I asked if you could teach me to be good.” My heart warms, remembering those moments with Danger when I was nineteen. “You took your job very seriously too, I might add.”
I expect him to make some comment about when he saw a challenge he had to accept. Instead, his next words blow me away. “You were my first.”
I gasp, shocked at his confession. “You were twenty-one. I heard all the girls talk about you with hearts in their eyes.” I tried to block out all the ones who told their conquest stories about Danger. There were so many of them. Always bragging how they were able to get him.
“And I never slept with any of them till after we were done. Even after, most of the stories were made up. I just never corrected anyone.”
I study his serious face, a little confused. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
It’s probably a good thing. I might have fallen in love with him immediately back then.
He shrugs. “Thought maybe you wouldn’t want me to help you. I was embarrassed, and I liked the reputation I held back then.”
“Do you still like the reputation you have?” My breath stills, staying locked in my lungs as I await his answer. It shouldn’t matter, but it does to me.
“I like who I am when I’m with you.” He’s back to looking at my lips, but I can’t stop staring at his vibrant blue eyes. They hold a raw and unfiltered emotion I’ve never seen before. This side of Danger is one he refuses to put out there for anyone to see. I feel special for him sharing it with me.
He’s never looked so hot in my life. My stomach clenches, and I’m suddenly hot in all my layers of clothing. My core rockets to life under his watchful eyes. My body wants me to launch myself at him, and I realize that I hope Danger will make a move that will cross that line once again.
My eyes wander down to his full, parted lips. It’s been years since I’ve sampled them. Slowly, he moves in, and I wait to see what he’s going to do. He angles his face toward mine, his lips graze my cheek as he leans closer. The anticipation is killing me, but finally, his lips descend; kissing me wildly. It’s like lightning hits our small enclosed area, and sparks fly. Our mouths mold perfectly, even better than when we were younger. Our lips move together, and I let him in, feeling his tongue slide in, tasting a little like peaches. This is more than just letting him touch me. Deep down, I know this will cause him to hold my heart once again in the palm of his hand.
He maneuvers me so I’m flat on my back, him resting above me without ending our kiss. His weight on top of mine feels like a safety blanket I never want to let go of. His kisses are pure heaven, with a dash of forbidden. A moan slips free as my hands slide up his strong arms and over his shoulders.
Danger’s legs rest between mine, his stiff jeans against my soft sweatpants. I suck on his bottom lip, nipping at it just enough for him to feel the new sensation. Then his hand is sliding up my sweater, his cold hand dipping inside, a striking contrast to my warm skin. It doesn’t take long for my body to warm his.
This is crazy. I can’t believe I’m kissing Danger, when I vowed I’d never do it again. But I never had reason on my side when it comes to Danger. He’s far too tempting, and I have no voice of reason where he’s concerned. His lips find my neck, and I moan out again, the sound being taken over by the lapping of waves.
We’re too far out to be seen clearly. The night and a small group of trees at the start of the parking lot give us the privacy we need.
My fingers thread through his hair, giving him small tugs of affection. His cock bumps into my sensitive area with each kiss down my neck. My heart is pounding, my whole body aching with need. The movie plays in the background, no longer the focal point. I welcome the sensation of his hands grazing my skin as he slowly brings my sweater and shirt up a few inches at a time. I relish under the affection of his lips dipping down to follow the trail of my clothing that’s moving upwards. I want him, like I need air to breath. Fisting his shirt, I pull him toward me, my hands going underneath, wanting the connection his skin under my hands.
Danger tosses his shirt over his head and begins pulling at mine. It’s not long before I’m bare before him, the dim light giving us just enough to see each other. He’s chiseled in all the right places, able to make any girl drool.
He leans down, placing kisses on top of my nipples. I already know he’s thinking about the nipple barbell I got when I was eighteen. He’s probably wondering when I got rid of it.
He kisses me again. This time, he’s demanding, hard, and passionate, like he may not survive if we stop. Our hands are everywhere. He’s cupping my breasts, tweaking my nipples while I fumble trying to get his belt undone.
Breaking our kiss ever so briefly, he unfastens his belt for me, and then we both rip off our pants. The only thing between us is my black cheeky panties. I can feel his dick press against the apex of my thighs while he kisses me as if he may never let me go.
“Derek.” His name comes out breathless. I’m not sure if I’m pleading for him to keep going or trying to warn us off.
“Do you want this?” he asks, his body stilling, ready for any response I may have.
“I want you.” That’s all he needs to hear. His fingers slide through the bottom of my panties, circling my clit before slipping through my wet folds. I’m almost embarrassed by how drenched I am.
His fingers are magic, working my body over. Then he’s pulling away from me. A brief history of all our years flashes through me, thinking he’s going to take it all back. Instead, he’s taking my panties off, a condom wrapper clenched with his teeth.
“I want you to know that I didn’t plan for this when I brought you here.” I watch in fascination as he rolls the condom over his hard length.
“Make love to me, Danger.” I tug at him, kissing his neck. I don’t want to be fucked by Danger, the rodeo god. I want to be loved by Danger, the boy who first held my heart when I was eleven years old. Our eyes hold each other; there is no mistake he understands the meaning behind my words.
He nods, positioning himself to slowly enter me.
I suck in a breath as my body acclimatizes to his size. Slowly, he rocks back and forth, my legs wrapped around him, my heels pressing into his back. Then he’s moving us with ease so that I’m straddling him, his hands holding onto my waist as his cock goes deeper, burrowing all the way in.
His dick feels incredibly deep, rubbing against a spot deep inside. It’s not long before I’m the one out of control, riding him like a bull. I can’t get enough. With each thrust, he’s kissing some part of me, his hands never leaving my body.
Just as he bites down on the nipple that once held my piercing, an orgasm shoots through me. Danger hugs me close, his lips kissing up and down my neck, trying to keep me from moving off him.
Just as I’m starting to come down from my high, he’s pushing himself deeper into me, grunting as his orgasm washes through him.
Ten
&
nbsp; Haven
“I did it again, Frankie,” I announce, walking down Main Street that’s across from the boardwalk.
“You ate the sketchy chili dog again, didn’t you?” She’s shaking her head at me.
If only that was it. But I have to give her credit for her choice of wording; hopefully, it’s not an analogy.
We’re the only two around, except for the squawking seagulls that are hoping to find a free meal. The early risers for boating left hours ago, while the stores still don’t open for another hour.
My head tilts. “Not exactly.”
This morning at sunrise, all I could think about was every scenario that could go down once Danger woke up next to me. The possibilities scared me. My biggest fear was he’d wake up and regret what we had done, or worse, pretend it didn’t happen.
“Did Danger kick you out for having too much gas? Is that why you woke me up at the ass crack of dawn, and we’re walking like the red hat ladies who walk then lunch?”
“Worse. We kissed...” She stops in her tracks. This feels more nerve wreaking than admitting to my parents I’m not a virgin. “And maybe some more.” Wincing, I try to gauge her reaction.
“You slept with my brother again!” You would think her tone would be full of disappointment, maybe even anger. Instead, she’s jumping up and down, practically giddy. “Now we can be real sisters!” she yells before she hugs me so hard it feels like my ribs are crushing. For a small girl, she has some force behind her. She’s the forever romantic who is always searching out her happily ever after.
Shushing her, I don’t need the whole town knowing my business more than they already do. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. This is new. You can’t tell a soul. Not until we have things figured out.”
