The Way Back Home

by Barbara Freethy

  “She certainly likes you,” Alicia commented.

  Gabe grinned. “I’ve got a way with the ladies.”

  “The four-legged ones, anyway. Sadie, down.” The dog stopped jumping, giving Alicia an expectant look. “I know you’re hungry,” Alicia told her. “I guess I’ll start the salvage operation after breakfast.”

  Before they could start back to the house, Justin came running down the hill in his pajamas.

  “You’re up early,” Alicia said in amazement. “On school days, I can barely drag you out of bed.”

  “I wanted to see what the fire did. Wow. It’s really bad,” Justin declared. “How did it start?”

  “We’re not sure yet,” she said. “But we’ll be fine. We can rebuild.” She ran a hand through Justin’s hair. “Are you hungry?”

  “I’m starving. And you need to make me a lunch, too. Because Keith is going to take us hiking at Mc-Claren’s Park, and we’re going to have a picnic.”

  “That sounds like fun.”

  “And we’re still doing the sleepover tonight, right?” Justin’s face scrunched up in concern as he looked at her. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay with you today? I don’t want you to be alone on your birthday.”

  “I’m not alone. And I have a lot of things to do today. Your gift to me is to go out with Keith and David and have a fantastic time.”

  “But you’re going to be sad, because it’s Uncle Rob’s birthday, too.”

  She squatted down so she could look him in the eyes. “I will miss Rob today, but I know he wouldn’t want us to be sad. Rob was always happy. So I’m going to honor him today by not being sad, and you should do the same.”

  Justin didn’t look completely convinced but said, “Okay. When do you want me to give you your present?”

  “How about after breakfast?”

  “All right,” he said, then took off up the hill.

  “I forgot it’s your birthday,” Gabe said as they walked toward the house.

  “I wish everyone would forget,” she said with a sigh. “I asked Keith to take Justin today and tonight because I didn’t want to spend all day pretending to be happy.”

  “Keith does seem like a good guy.” He hated to admit it, but so far, he hadn’t found anything to actively dislike about the guy. “But he wants you to give up your business, you know that.”

  “I do. Keith doesn’t like conflict. He likes people to like him, and that usually happens, because he’s really likable. The animosity toward me and my father, and even the kids at school toward Justin, is getting to him. He thinks it would be easier for all of us if we just moved on. And maybe it would be. Sometimes I don’t even know why I’m fighting, because going out on the river is actually the last thing I want to do. But I feel compelled to save my business, too, because I don’t want to let some cowardly, fuel-line-cutting arsonist win.”

  He smiled. Alicia was good at bouncing back. “Of course you don’t want that. You want to kick someone’s ass, and I’m going to help you.”

  She nodded. “Yes, because frankly, an almost-ten-year-old and a crippled sixty-year-old are not enough firepower.”

  “Speaking of firepower, I saw two rifles in Rob’s closet.”

  “Yes, Rob loved guns. My father does, too.”

  “Do you know how to shoot?”

  “I used to go with Rob and my dad to the shooting range. But I’m not going to shoot anyone,” she added, her gaze narrowing. “It’s one thing to aim at a target, but a person—I couldn’t do it.”

  “What if they had a gun pointed at you—or your son?”

  “Well, that’s completely different. If Justin’s life was in danger, I could do anything. But I’m sure no one’s life is at stake here.” She frowned. “Are you trying to scare me?”

  “I would have thought the fire would have done that.”

  “I don’t think anyone was supposed to get hurt.”

  “Probably not. But I’m not going to let anyone get this close to you again, Alicia.”

  “I have no idea how you’re going to do that,” she said wearily.

  He didn’t, either, but he’d just made another promise that he was not going to break.

  Twelve

  The kitchen at the Blackberry Inn smelled like cinnamon and maple syrup. Kelly finished up the last of the breakfast orders with a weary sigh. They went all out on Sundays, offering pancakes and waffles with blueberry and strawberry toppings, a vegetarian frittata, a slow-cooked flaxseed oatmeal sprinkled with brown sugar, along with fresh pecan rolls and an array of colorful fruit.

  As the server took out the last of the plates, Kelly tucked a loose strand of hair back into her ponytail and set her skillet in the sink.

  “That was fun,” Nora said, returning to the kitchen with empty plates. “Everyone loved your food. Most people practically licked their plates clean.”

  “That will make the washing up go faster. But you know that clearing the tables is not your job.”

  “I do what’s needed. I enjoy talking to our guests. It’s so interesting meeting people from all over the country. Your mother used to love it, too. I hope when she’s feeling better, she’ll be back in the dining room chatting it up.”

  “I took her some breakfast earlier, but she said she wasn’t hungry. She’s nervous about the surgery.”

  “That makes sense. Last time she was in the hospital, your dad died.”

  “Yeah, but this is completely different.”

  “Of course it is,” Nora said with a reassuring smile. “Lynette just has to deal with some memories, that’s all. But I know she’s relieved to have you here, even if she hasn’t been up for much conversation.”

  Kelly picked up a sponge and wiped down the counter. “I’d forgotten how much fun it was to run my own kitchen.”

  “How’s the restaurant in Sacramento?”

  “It’s all right. Sometimes they go for quantity instead of quality.”

  “That must be hard for a perfectionist like yourself.”

  “I try not to care too much.”

  “That doesn’t sound like you at all. You’ve always been very particular about your cooking. It’s your passion.”

  “I’m not interested in passion anymore. It hurts too much. So now I protect my heart.”

  “Oh, honey, protecting your heart isn’t the same as letting it heal. Sometimes you need open air and sunshine to close a wound. Hiding it away just makes it fester.”

  She sighed. “Leave it alone, Nora.”

  “I have been leaving it alone, and I’m thinking that was wrong.”

  “You? You’re never wrong,” she teased, trying to lighten the mood and change the subject. “Have you seen Ian this morning?”

  “Nope.”

  She set down her sponge and leaned against the counter. “I’m worried about him, Nora. He seems so angry and withdrawn.”

  “He’s been that way since Brian died,” Nora said. “I thought he was acting out because he was grieving.”

  Brian and Ian had gotten close. Ian had finally gotten a brother, and they’d joked about how he wouldn’t be outnumbered by women anymore. She’d been so caught up in her own pain that she hadn’t really thought about what her brother had gone through. “I need to talk to him.”

  “Well, you’ll have to catch him first. He’s probably in town at the carnival. It’s all anyone is doing this weekend.”

  And it was the last thing she wanted to do, but sitting around the inn with nothing to do but think also didn’t seem very appealing. “I guess I’ll go into town and look for him.”

  “Really?” Nora said with surprise. “I thought you were avoiding town.”

  “I was. But the one person I wanted to avoid showed up here yesterday, so I might as well go check out the carnival.”

  “Who showed up here?”

  “Alicia. Her car broke down a few blocks away. She couldn’t get cell-phone reception, and it was raining, so she came here.”

  “Oh, my.
How was that?” Nora asked curiously.

  “It was awkward, uncomfortable, sad, bittersweet. We had one kind of nice moment, but it was mostly bad.”

  “But not all bad?”

  “Stop it, Nora. I’m not making up with her. The wall between us is too high and too big.”

  “You can tear it down.”

  “I don’t want to tear it down. I just want to ignore it.”

  “The problem with walls is if you try to ignore them, you just keep bumping into them.”

  She took off her apron and tossed it at Nora. “I’ll see you later.”

  “You are so stubborn.”

  “Just like you,” Kelly retorted as she headed toward the door.

  Nora’s words rang through her head as she jogged up the stairs to her attic room. She wasn’t being stubborn. She was just moving on with her life. Some friendships didn’t last forever. And right now, she had a more pressing concern. She needed to make sure that Ian wasn’t in any trouble. Then, once she got her mom through surgery and back on her feet, she could return to Sacramento without any regrets.

  Twenty minutes later, Kelly parked at the edge of downtown. There were a lot of tourists in town for the festival and far more cars and people than she was used to seeing on Main Street. In one way, it was good. It was easier to blend in with so many strangers around, people who didn’t know her or Brian. She wasn’t in the mood for carnival rides or games, so she decided to take a walk and see what had changed in six months. It soon became clear that nothing had changed. Her life had been spun off its axis, but River Rock had simply gone on without her.

  As she passed friends and neighbors on the street, she said hello, exchanged pleasantries about the weather and what she was doing with her life now, cooed over a few babies, and pretended that she was doing fine. No one probed too deeply, and for that she was grateful. She was just starting to relax when she turned the corner and saw Brian’s photography studio.

  He had opened the studio three years ago with his cousin, and apparently, Randy had decided to keep it open. Her steps slowed. She wasn’t quite ready to see Brian’s photographs in the large display windows on either side of the front door. Then again, she couldn’t hold herself back.

  Pausing in front of the window, she drew a deep breath as the beauty of Yosemite greeted her. Brian had taken the shot when they’d gone on a weekend getaway, and he had truly captured the majesty of the mountains and the waterfalls. He’d had such an eye for the perfect shot. Even though he’d made a living taking school pictures and photographing weddings, his true gift had been his artistic photographs. And he’d made some nice money on the side selling his pictures online.

  The other photographs on display were just as beautiful. Brian had left behind a legacy of art. He’d made his mark on the world. That was something most people didn’t get to do.

  She was so caught up in the pictures that she jumped back when the store door opened.

  “Kelly?” Brian’s mother gave a shriek of surprise and then rushed forward, embracing her in a big hug. “Oh, my God. I heard you were back. It’s so good to see you. So good,” she repeated as she pulled back and gave her a long, searching look. “How are you? You look pale and thin. Have you been eating, sleeping?”

  “I’m doing all right,” she replied with a smile. Dina Farr was a tall woman with white-blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a perpetual tan. Like Brian, she was outgoing and full of energy. She’d been very close to her youngest son and had been devastated by his shocking death. But it looked like Dina had managed to pull herself together in the past six months. Or maybe, like her, Dina was just pretending to be normal.

  “How’s your mother?” Dina asked. “I heard she’s about to have hip surgery.”

  “Yes, and she’s quite nervous about it.”

  “I’ll bet she’s glad to have you home. And I’m sure the hip replacement will be great in the long run. I know she’s been hobbling around in pain for a few years now.”

  It was amazing how different in agility her mother and Dina were, even though they were about the same age. Dina played golf and tennis and hiked on the weekends. Her mother pretty much puttered in her garden and talked to her guests at the inn.

  “I’m hoping the surgery will allow her to be more active,” Kelly said. “So, what are you doing here?”

  “I’ve been helping out the past few months. Randy is busy with the photography side, and he needed some help with the bookkeeping. I’m only working three days a week in the school library now—cutbacks, you know. So I was happy to help out. I came in today to pull out the proofs from Jordan’s wedding. She just got back from her honeymoon and is dying to see the pictures. I was going to wait until Monday, but when I ran into her this morning at church, she looked so wistful I told her she could come down and pick them up.” Dina checked her watch. “I hope she’s not late, because I have to judge the pie contest at the carnival.”

  “You?” Kelly asked with a smile. “Do they know you can’t cook?”

  “They know I love to eat.” Her eyes sparkled. “I’m so glad I ran into you. I want you to come to the house for dinner. Lowell is in Scotland with his ailing sister, so I’m all alone. I’ll ask Russell and his girlfriend to come over, too. It will be just like old … well, it will be good,” Dina said quickly, catching herself.

  “I’d love to come,” she said, even though the thought of sitting down at the Farrs’ and seeing Brian’s empty chair made her feel nauseated. But they’d been so good to her, welcoming her into their family. She couldn’t say no.

  “I’m kind of hoping you might decide to move back here. I hate to think of you in Sacramento all alone.”

  “I have friends there now. It’s a good change for me.”

  Dina gave her a look that said she wasn’t quite buying her story, but she didn’t press. “I guess we all do what we have to do.”

  “Yes,” she agreed. “Speaking of doing what we have to do, I’m worried about Russell. He seems so angry still. And I know he got into a fight the other day at Mullaney’s.”

  Dina’s smile faded. “I heard about that. Apparently, some friend of the Haydens said something to him.”

  “Or Russell said something. He needs to find a way to work through some of his anger. I’m afraid it’s going to eat him alive.” She paused as a familiar figure called her name and then came running down the street. Before she knew it, she was being swung around in a tight hug.

  “Kelly!” Jordan declared with a big smile. “I’m so glad you’re here. I was going to come down to the inn later.”

  Jordan looked amazing, with a light tan to her normally fair skin, a sparkle in her green eyes, and a short sundress that showed off her long legs.

  Kelly smiled. “I’m so happy to see you,” she said with genuine pleasure. Jordan had been one of her closest friends. They didn’t go back as far as she and Alicia, because Jordan’s family hadn’t moved to town until the end of middle school, but they’d still shared many wonderful moments and memories. “You look radiant.”

  “I’m in love. I guess it shows.”

  “Absolutely. So, the honeymoon isn’t over?” she teased.

  “Not by a long shot. We’ve just moved it back to River Rock. Married life is so wonderful. I never imagined it could be so good. And my parents are ecstatic that I’ve finally settled down and that there might even be grandchildren—” Jordan stopped somewhat abruptly, as if she’d suddenly realized that she was a little too happy for this particular conversation with these particular people.

  That’s what Kelly hated the most, the fact that people couldn’t just be normal around her anymore. They kept tripping over themselves not to say something hurtful. But it didn’t matter what they said, because the hurt was always there.

  “The proofs are inside,” Dina said, her expression strained. Obviously, Jordan’s words had reminded her of the wedding she would never attend for Brian. “Why don’t you both come in?”

  Jordan grabbed h
er hand and pulled her into the studio before she could say no.

  It took her a moment to catch her breath. In this room, where Brian had invested so much of his time and his life, she could feel his presence more strongly than anywhere else. She could picture him sitting at the consultation table, talking to prospective clients as he’d done so many times. She’d always been amazed at how good he was with people, even the nervous brides who were afraid that their precious pictures would get screwed up.

  “Sit down with me while I look,” Jordan said, drawing her attention back.

  Dina took the proofs out of an envelope and spread them across the table. “I have to run over to the carnival for a while. Do you still have your key, Kelly?”

  “Oh, I guess I do,” she said. Brian had given her a key when she’d started helping out in the studio a couple of days a week, and she’d never taken it off her key ring. “I should have given it back to you.”

  “Don’t worry about it. Just lock up here when you’re done. And, Jordan, let me know what you want to order, and I’ll pass it along to Randy. He’ll take care of everything tomorrow.”

  “Thanks, Dina. I appreciate the early preview,” Jordan said.

  “Well, I don’t blame you for wanting to see your pictures. You two have fun.”

  As Dina left, Kelly glanced down at the first photo of Jordan and her husband, Philip. It was a shot taken at the altar of the local church, and Jordan looked spectacular in an off-the-shoulder gown. But it wasn’t Jordan’s beauty that captured her attention; it was the look of love in her eyes as she gazed up at Philip. It was clear that she adored him.

  A rush of moisture filled Kelly’s eyes. “You look beautiful. I wish I’d seen you walk down the aisle.”

  “I wish the same thing,” Jordan said.

  She lifted her guilty gaze to Jordan’s. “I’m sorry. I thought about coming. I just couldn’t make myself do it.”

  “You should have been there, Kelly,” Jordan said with hurt in her eyes. “I understood why you didn’t want to be a bridesmaid anymore, and I understood that it would be hard for you to attend, because we made so many of our wedding plans together. But I thought you’d still show up for me.”