The Line That Binds Series Box Set

by J. M. Miller

  On Tuesday, class with Izzy was awkward. I could hear the hesitation when she spoke to me. I figured Ben had told her and Spaz about us. Thankfully, she eased back into small talk the remainder of the week, making things far more comfortable.

  The headaches continued as usual, pumping all the voices of students inside my head and swirling them in one giant mass of misery. Some days were worse than others. Most wishes I could let go, ignoring the internal pleas for creativity, diligence, or humility. But others I couldn’t. A handful brought me to my emotional knees. Knowing that some people were living situations graver and far more punished than my own, I damned my own fate and welcomed the nosebleeds.

  Another headache, aside from the literal ones, was Ryan. Luckily, Mr. Hobt continued to keep a close eye on me after I’d gotten in trouble for talking Monday. His incessant stares to our area at the back of class forced Ryan to keep his mouth shut. He didn’t give up completely, though, working as many charming smiles and flirty words as he could at the beginning and end of class. Izzy picked up on my subtle discomfort and would often step between us or cut him off to give me some space.

  After school, I’d been overloaded with work information from Simone. She delved deeper into the party planning aspects, going over more procedures as well as the arrangements we had with local companies. She also brought up payroll and basic expenses and I found myself taking more notes than a bloated school day.

  By the time Friday came around, I was drained. The week was messy and I was so glad the end was within reach. As per Simone’s latest request, I plugged some client info into the computer and printed out next week’s event schedule to display in the kitchen’s prep area for temps and caterers.

  “You better get going,” Simone murmured to me.

  I leaned back in my chair to see her desk from the closet office. “It’s not five yet,” I said, glancing at the clock hanging by the window behind her. It was only three.

  Her face stayed angled toward her computer monitor, the soft glow highlighting her sharp nose and cheekbones. “Emily will be here soon.”

  I watched her slim fingers pull at the ends of her brown hair unconsciously while I contemplated her statement. Emily’s on her way. I tapped my foot and tipped my eyes to the ceiling, rolling the words through my mind again. Oh, right. I had to leave when she was scheduled to avoid conflict. Today was the first day she’d be here since I started Co-op.

  “LJ?” Simone called me again, breaking my thoughts, still not looking away from her monitor. “Don’t forget you’re babysitting the Connor wedding tomorrow. I’ll leave all the information on my desk. If you have any questions, call me. It’s a simple ceremony/reception combo with a planner so there shouldn’t be any issues.”

  I stood from the closet desk then stuffed my phone into my jean pockets and slid my arms into my hoodie. I thought I was off this weekend. “I’m babysitting?”

  She finally looked up with one of her eyebrows raised. I fidgeted nervously while I wracked my brain. Shit. I got nothing. Did I really agree to party sitting already?

  “Are you backing out on me? I don’t really like employees who duck out of commitments.”

  “No. I’m not trying to get out of it. I honestly forgot. It’s been a really long week,” I added, hoping she’d relax. Her intensity brought a restricted feel to the room, forcing me to breathe deeper.

  The small creases along her forehead evened out, settling her eyes. “Good. The ceremony starts at ten, which means you need to be here at nine. A few temps are scheduled to assist the caterer, florist, and planner. Do you have any nicer pants or skirts?” she asked, staring down at my ripped jeans. “You can’t wear the Krueger jeans.”

  “Krueger?”

  “You know,” she said, rippling her fingers like she was the cheerleading captain for a psycho ward. “Freddy Krueger? With the knife fingers? Sliced up.”

  I shook my head, vaguely recalling the name. I knew I’d heard it somewhere before.

  “It doesn’t matter,” she said, waving her hands and looking back to the monitor. “Just make sure you look presentable.” She reached in front of her, grabbed an envelope off her desk, and handed it to me without looking. “Payday. I’d suggest you use it for clothes if you don’t have any.”

  “Thanks,” I muttered as I walked out the door. Even if I had to babysit an event, it would still be nice to get a weekend break from her. I had a feeling her nice was wearing off.

  I trotted the stairs quickly, ready to sink into my tub and leave the whole week behind. A blonde girl wearing plain black pants and a white button-down emerged from the kitchen and strode toward me, flipping paperwork in her hands. She was wearing the required clothes for temps and part-time employees, but I hadn’t seen her before. She looked a few years older than me, with long legs and an easy smile.

  “Hi,” I said, facing her when I reached the bottom of the stairs. I heard the front door open behind me and watched the girl’s eyes narrow in that direction.

  “Hi,” she replied, though I barely heard it as a headache ripped through my head.

  I clenched my eyes shut, waiting for what always came next. Instead of a wish, there was another voice from behind me.

  “Paige! I heard you flunked out of Penn State. Your parents must be so proud,” Emily’s voice spit from behind me.

  “I wish I had the guts to finally put her in her place,” Paige’s voice joined the high pitches inside my mind as I watched her eyes gloss over. Her lids trembled slightly, using all control to hold back the tears. With that look, I knew their rivalry was old, but still very much alive. I didn’t know their circumstances and I really didn’t care. It took me one second to grab hold of Paige’s empty hand.

  “Hi, Paige, I’m LJ,” I said with a smile. “It’s nice to meet you.”

  She blinked, possibly frightened by my awkward greeting in the middle of the tense moment, or perhaps overcome with the wish I’d just granted. “N-nice to meet you, too.”

  “Aw. It’s so sweet to see two of Ben’s toys connect,” Emily said with a laugh from closer behind me. “And I’m thrilled Simone pitied you enough to give you your old job back, Paige. It should make things even more fun around here.”

  I crushed my own eyes together at Emily’s bitter words. Paige was with Ben too? It shook me more than it should have. I knew he’d been with other girls. Possibly many other girls. But I had to remind myself that those circumstances were a lot different than ours. Emily would never understand that. She was, however, about to understand more about Paige. And I didn’t feel one ounce of guilt.

  Blood started to trickle from my nose as I opened my eyes. Ignoring Paige’s stare, I turned to Emily and pinched my nostrils together.

  “What’s with the nosebleed, LJ? Can’t handle coke as well as your mom?”

  Bitch! The shock of her knowing about my mom was what hit me the hardest. I was already numb to the reality of Mom’s habits. I chuckled angrily, when I really wanted to punch her in the face. She could think what she wanted, but I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of getting me riled. I shrugged and moved to leave.

  “Good to know you haven’t changed a bit, Emily,” Paige snapped. “Let me guess, you still chasing Ryan? You know,” she said with a giggle, “he visited some friends at Main Campus last year. He mentioned you, actually. That’s right,” she paused, pointing her finger in the air as if she’d just remembered. “It was right after a party you threw at your house. He said he’d been dodging you all night when he happened to run into your mom outside. Apparently, she’d left your dad at his office soiree to grab something from home. Anyway, I guess that’s not really important. Ryan just mentioned how impressed he was with her blowjob skills.” Paige smirked when Emily’s eyes popped open.

  Emily stepped closer to Paige, her face as red as her hair. “You stupid—”

  “Emily,” Simone said from the top of the stairs. Her hand tapped on the bannister post, one of her rings echoing her irritation. “You’re
late.”

  “I might be stupid, but at least I’m honest,” Paige whispered to Emily then smiled at me. “I never hooked up with Ben.”

  I smirked at Emily. “Your time here is running out,” I whispered to her flustered face before opening the door and stepping out into the chilly November air.

  “You have to come out,” Gavin said then tipped his head back and drained the rest of his soda. When he finished, he slammed the can on the counter and burped for extra guy effect.

  “No, I don’t,” I replied, wiping a towel along the stovetop. I shook the crumbs into the sink and draped the towel over the faucet.

  Gavin finished chewing the last bite of his burger and wiped his hands on his shirt. “Yes, you need to come out and watch. Ben’s taught me some really cool stuff. I’m gonna do some jumps tonight.” His blue eyes twinkled with excitement, though I could hardly see them through his hair.

  “You’re not racing,” I stated, making sure he didn’t get too excited about this competition apparently organized by Ben and Spaz.

  “Yeah, yeah. Ben said I couldn’t anyway. He doesn’t know some of the people coming. Plus, I ride a smaller engine. I wouldn’t have a chance of winning.”

  I sighed, mentally thanking Ben for having enough sense to shut Gavin down when he needed to. “How many people are coming to this thing anyway?”

  “Not many.” He jumped off his seat and put his plate in the dishwasher. “Does that mean you’ll come then?”

  It probably wasn’t the best idea, but I did love to watch Ben ride. “Maybe.”

  “What the hell, Spaz?” I said, watching another truck roll up the drive. There were already seven lining the track. None of them I knew.

  “Dude, chill. Really,” he replied, shifting his bike in the bed of his truck then riding it down the welded metal ramp. Iz followed his lead immediately after, coasting her bike to the ground. “Look, I only invited a couple of people. If it gets too big, we’ll deal.”

  I shook my head, feeling a hazy delay from the first couple of beers. Shit. Why did I agree to this crap? All I wanted to do was drink a few more hefeweizens and pass the hell out. This night was going to suck. I managed to reply with a regretful grunt as I bent down to open the small cooler at my feet.

  “Is Lloyd home?” Spaz asked after I cracked open a new bottle.

  He eyed me, waiting for a response while I tipped the bottle back and let the cool brew drown my cares. Pop was okay with me having some beer here and there as long as I kept it discreet. Spaz knew. He also knew I was pushing my luck by bringing a cooler outside.

  I righted my face and stared behind him at the people unloading bikes from their trucks. Headlights were on, skimming beams across the small peaks of the track as the surrounding sky faded out to inky blackness. “Actually, Pop went out tonight,” I finally answered. “Poker with Randall.”

  “Well, that’s good,” Izzy said a little too sarcastically, tapping the base of my beer with her fingernail.

  I raised an indifferent eyebrow. They both saw the changes taking hold of me. If they knew the whole truth, they probably wouldn’t judge me as harshly.

  “Cool,” Spaz said and snagged a beer of his own, dropping his inquisition.

  Iz folded her arms, no longer staring at the bottle in my hand. She probably pitied me. The daily recap of Chem class she gave me allowed her glimpses into my currently jacked-up head. I craved information about LJ and Iz was my only supplier. Knowing LJ hadn’t been responsive to Ryan’s douchery was a huge relief. It was one less thing I needed to worry about. Hopefully.

  They both kicked their starter pegs and tore off toward my half-ass track, which was about to have its durability tested. I walked over to the barn, ditching the small cooler for my bike. The bottle in my hand ticked against the brake lever as I rode over to meet the group.

  I killed my engine, jumped off, and leaned back against its seat. After a few brief introductions over the twang of the country music spewing from someone’s cab, I found out the riders who worked with Spaz’s mom had invited some friends of their own. I knew it wouldn’t stay a few people.

  I downed the rest of my beer while Spaz and Iz covered host responsibilities. It was their idea, and I barely cared, so keeping everyone straight was on them. Two more trucks pulled up. One was a black-on-black Chevy with a Honda 450 identical to mine strapped in the bed. Ryan.

  “Who invited the douche?” I said.

  Spaz and Iz whipped their heads around and so did the mid-twenties guy they’d invited. I’d already forgotten his name. Maybe Cliff, or Chris.

  “No clue,” Spaz said, standing a little straighter.

  “The douche is my cousin,” Chet or Chase said, casting a quick glance at me like he was offended. He was tall, but almost as thin as Iz. I knew I could take him if I needed to.

  Spaz glanced at me, possibly thinking the same thing, then turned back to Chaz, or Chip. “Your cousin’s an ass, Colt. Maybe you should let him know he isn’t welcome before we do.”

  Colt? I was close enough.

  Colt shrugged his scrawny shoulders and nodded a greeting toward Ryan, who hopped into the bed of his truck with a smug look that made my fist clench with a muscle memory, anxious to blacken another one of his eyes. “I’m sure we can race without any problems, right?”

  Spaz glanced at me again, unsure of what I wanted. I nodded at Colt’s question, watching Ryan unstrap his bike in the bed of his truck. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s possible. Cash is cash. I’ll take it regardless who hands it over,” I said, receiving chuckles from Spaz and Iz, and a few scoffs from the other riders.

  “Hey!” a voice cut through the song’s depressing melody. Gavin appeared a second later, walking around Ryan’s parked truck, holding the helmet I’d given him. His unfastened boots shuffled the last steps before playfully bumping shoulders with Iz. A happy greeting. Too happy.

  “No,” I said automatically, watching the peppy gleam in his eye disappear with his smile.

  “I know. I’m just here to watch, and maybe do some jumps later,” he mumbled and Iz bumped his shoulder again.

  I let out a sigh, relieved that out of all the possible fights tonight one was already resolved. He knew there was no chance he’d race. He wasn’t ready.

  “It’s a fifty dollar buy-in,” Spaz said, answering someone’s question. While Spaz started dishing the rules to the other riders, and Iz and Gavin started talking to themselves, I glanced up where Gavin had come from. Behind Ryan’s truck, I could see LJ’s window. Her light was out.

  I watched Ryan’s bike disappear off his truck then reappear alongside. He turned his head around for a moment, something catching his attention. LJ walked up beside him. I clutched the bottle in my right hand and the Honda’s throttle grip in my left. Why did she come out? Ryan smiled as he talked to her. She didn’t return one. Thank God. The music drowned out their conversation and I was tempted to throw the bottle at whichever truck was to blame. I ached to hear her voice. It’d been days since I had.

  Her hair was loose tonight. It’s silky, black strands swayed with the light breeze, flicking against her cheeks. She tucked some around an ear and kept walking, still listening to whatever the douche was telling her as he pushed his bike. The bulky bomber jacket she was wearing shifted as she shrugged her shoulders at him. He laughed. They were close enough that I heard it. She showed him a very small grin, her lips tipping in the softest of expressions. Shit! I shouldn’t be worried about this. Stupid high school crap was nothing compared to what she was dealing with. But I couldn’t stop it from digging into my skin anyway.

  I tipped my bottle back again, forgetting it was already empty. The last few drops trickled over my lips while I continued to stare at hers. I instantly thought of the last time I tasted them, lying in my bed last week after waking beside her. I gripped the bottle tighter in my hand, squeezing until I thought it might break. This was almost too much to handle. I let the bottle fall, tossing it aside without much force or care. Whe
n her face turned forward again, she lifted her stare from the ground, meeting my eyes fully for the first time in close to a week. Still yards away, maybe she felt safer with the distance between us. At the same time, though, it felt as if she were standing right in front of me, the distance dissolving the instant our eyes connected. Tints of light from the trucks shone on her face, causing her to glow like a freaking angel. Dammit. I took a deep breath as her eyes tore from mine, looking instead to Iz and Gavin.

  “Hey, who do you want to hold the cash?” Spaz asked.

  I couldn’t tear my eyes away from LJ as easily. “A neutral party,” I replied, wishing I had my cooler next to me to interrupt my thoughts.

  “No shit,” he said. “But who? Gavin?”

  “The little kid?” Colt asked with a laugh.

  I was just about speak, but Ryan approached and beat me to it. “LJ can hold the money. I trust her judgment. She obviously knows a bad deal when she sees one.”

  I stood up so fast my head spun from the alcohol. But I held my shit together because I was ready to pummel him.

  “Benj,” Spaz said, stepping in front of me and pushing his hand against my chest. I glanced down warningly, but he didn’t remove it. He kept his voice low and said, “Let’s just get on the track and take these assholes’ money.”

  “Yeah, whatever,” I grumbled, staring at Ryan, who smirked at me then collected the cash from the other riders. He took ours from Spaz and moved over to LJ.

  “Don’t let him get to you, man,” Spaz said while I watched Ryan talk to LJ again. Iz glanced at us from beside them and rolled her eyes. “See. You don’t have anything to worry about. Iz says he doesn’t have a shot with her.”

  I stole what little comfort his words held and hung on. It didn’t help settle my thoughts about her, though. She didn’t trust me. All I’d been trying to do was protect her, help her. Even though the fault was mine, it still hurt that she could stomp me out so easily.