by J. L. Beck
“Please,” I whimper, not sure what I’m begging for. All I know is I don’t want him to stop. He gently pulls the thin fabric aside, and the rough pads of his fingers land on my now exposed clit. A jolt of pleasure zings through me at the touch, and I almost come undone right there. No one has ever touched me like this, and nothing has ever felt this good.
“You’re wet for me,” his husky voice finds my ear.
He’s breathing deeply and starts rubbing little circles over the small bundle of nerves.
“Mmmhhh,” is all I can manage to get out. I’m beyond words, beyond coherent thought.
His touch is gentle but possessive at the same time, and he holds me, touches me like a fragile jewel. I feel the orgasm building deep in my abdomen, and I’m almost scared of the intensity. I’m almost there, right at the edge, and then he moves, dipping his fingers lower.
I gasp softly as he presses into my opening. I’m so wet, he slides in with ease.
That’s when I come apart. Shattering into a thousand pieces, I’m positive I’ll never find all of them. Falling off the cliff, I continue my descent, never hitting the bottom.
I’m still trembling when I finally pry my eyes open. I’m plastered against the wall, and Cage is holding the rest of my weight. Both of his hands are placed firmly on my hips now. Which is perfect because my legs are utterly useless at this moment.
Pulling away, he peers down, inspecting me. I look up at his face, and that’s when reality hits me. I just let Cage Wilder, the infamous playboy, finger me. Worse yet, in the hallway of a frat house. But that’s not the worst part, the worst is that I don’t care. Like a horned-up teenager, all I can think is I want more.
Licking my lips, I bat my eyes at him.
“I want you to take me downstairs…”
Conflict flickers in his dark gaze. The devil and angel hang on his shoulder, and I wonder which will win out. I want him, but do I want him bad enough to give him my virginity in some dark basement.
Shaking his head, he gives me a pained expression. “No, you don’t. You don’t want this. Hell, I don’t even want this. We’re just friends, remember?”
I nod. I know he’s right, but that doesn’t lessen the rejection. He doesn’t want me. For some stupid reason, my heart feels as if it’s being ripped in two.
As if I’m bleeding out sadness, Cage moves his hands from my hips and cups me by the cheeks, peering into my eyes.
I can smell the beer on his breath, and his spicy, manly scent makes it hard to think straight. I want him to touch me again. The booze I consumed is wearing off, and I’m feeling less fearless now, so no way would I make the first move, and especially not after the way he just rejected me.
“If you think for one second, the reason I don’t want to take you down there has to do with not wanting you, then you obviously haven’t been paying attention. I want you so bad, so fucking bad my balls ache to empty inside you, but this…” he pulls a hand away and gestures between us, “this is not what you need. I’m not what you need. I’m not going to cheapen your virginity with alcohol and a dark basement. If you had asked me any other time, I would probably take you up on your offer, but not right now. Plus, how can we stay friends if we’re screwing?” He winks. His response lessens the blow to my fragile ego but doesn’t ease the tension around my heart.
“I think…I want to go home now.” I look down, trying to forget about the way he just made me feel and the swarm of butterflies in my belly.
“I mean it, Blair. I want you. Just not tonight. Now, if you really want to go home, let me drive you back to the dorms.”
“Yeah, I’m ready to go. I’m partied out.” I make a feeble attempt at smiling.
We don’t go back to say goodbye to the guys. Cage leads me straight outside and to his truck. He helps me into the cab, even buckling me up before he walks around to his side.
Closing my eyes, I drift off a little. The next time I open my eyes, we are in front of the dorm, and Cage is killing the engine.
He comes around and helps me out of the truck. Just like at the party, he takes my hand and leads me upstairs to my room.
When we get inside, my eyes go to Amanda’s bed immediately, and I sigh in relief to see she isn’t here.
“You gonna be okay?” Cage asks. I let the question run through my head. Yes, I would be okay, but the thought of him leaving has dread seeping into me.
“Will you stay with me for a little while?” When he doesn’t answer right away, I add, “Please…”
“Okay.” He nods and slips out of his shoes. “Lay down,” he orders, and I sit on the bed and take off my sandals before crawling under my blanket.
A moment later, he climbs in behind me. It’s only a twin-sized bed, and Cage is a big guy, so we have to squeeze together, but I don’t mind the least bit. He pulls me into his chest and wraps his arms around me.
My last thought before I drift off is how I’ve never felt so safe and protected.
16
Cage
Warmth. It surrounds me like the sun beating down on my back on a summer day. There’s a body beside mine. Actually, tucked into me is more like it.
For a fraction of a second, I worry I went home with someone last night, someone other than Blair, but then I suck in a sharp breath, and I’m assaulted with the scent of fresh berries, and I instantly know where I am.
Like a trickling stream, the events of last night come back to me. The party, the basement, kiss, and the way Blair clung to me, her trusting eyes and whimpers as she asked me to touch her. I’ll never forget the way she felt as I sank two fingers inside her. It was like heaven feeling her silky channel squeeze my digits. I’ve been with plenty of girls, but no one came close to the way Blair felt, or the way she made me feel in return.
I’m a fucking saint for not going further than I did. All I wanted to do was strip her bare and touch every inch of her perfect body, but there was no way in hell I was going to let her first time take place in the basement of a frat house where anyone could see.
No, when I popped her cherry–if I get that lucky–I want it to be just the two of us, in my bed, with no one to interrupt us, so I could spend as many hours as I wanted feasting and fucking her. Fuck, I want her to be mine, every beautiful inch of her.
Beside me, she stirs, and I tighten my grip, holding her closer, wishing there wasn’t anything between our bodies.
“Is it really morning already?” she groans into the pillow.
“Yes, sunshine, it’s morning, but we don’t have to get up yet if you don’t want to.” Used to a rigorous workout schedule, it isn’t often that I get to sleep in. Between football and classes, I’m usually up at six am most days.
“Is Amanda here?” Blair asks, turning slightly in my arms, causing her ass to rub against my already stiff cock.
Holding back a groan, I croak, “No, I don’t think so.”
Just as I’m saying the words, the devil itself comes walking in. Blair moves so fast, jerking forward into an upright position, that her movements send me rolling off the bed, and I land on the floor in a giant heap.
“Didn’t I tell you not to sleep with him?” Those are the first words out of Amanda’s mouth and enough to make me snap.
“What is your problem? What do you actually achieve by treating others like shit?”
She shrugs. “Probably the same thing you achieve by sleeping with every girl on campus. Sucks to be on the receiving end, doesn’t it?”
“I didn’t sleep with him,” Blair confesses. Her voice is nothing more than a caress of wind between the trees.
I push up off the floor and climb to my feet before turning to look at her. Her face is red all the way up to her hairline, and she looks like she’s been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. She winces, and her gaze screams, sorry.
Is she ashamed or embarrassed? Maybe both. I know she doesn’t want Amanda to think we’re sleeping together, but who cares? Or maybe it’s my reputation and the rumors that
will come with doing so. I’ll bet it’s the latter.
“What’s it matter who she sleeps with?” I counter, pissed off that she wants to shove her nose in Blair’s business.
Amanda smiles, but it’s faker than the makeup on her face. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t care really. I just thought I would remind her that once she gives it up, you’ll want nothing to do with her. Seen it happen more than once, hell, I experienced it myself.”
Cringing, I grit my teeth. For once, I hate the reputation I’ve brought upon myself.
“It’s not like that with Blair, we’re friends.”
Well, we were friends. I’m not sure after what we did last night. Can you be friends with someone after you put your fingers in their vagina?
Amanda bursts into a fit of laughter, and I turn to Blair, who has a doleful expression on her face. This is getting worse by the second. I don’t want to leave her here to be Amanda’s personal punching bag.
“Friends? You, Cage Wilder, friends with a girl? And of all people her?” She snorts, but it’s nothing like Blair’s adorable snort. No, this sounds like a foghorn. “That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.”
“Shut up!” I growl over my shoulder.
“How about you get out!” she yells back, and I’m ready to explode on her, but as I look at Blair, the deep frown etched into her features, I hold it together. I know the moment I walk out of here, Amanda will turn her anger on Blair, and I won’t have that.
I’m completely out of my element with my next question, but I ask it anyway.
“Do you want to come stay with me for a little bit? You can have the spare bedroom. It’ll be temporary just so you can get away from her.”
“I’m right here, asshole,” Amanda yells, and I know if she continues with this hysteria, someone’s going to call campus security.
Blair shakes her head, and strands of hair fall into her face with the movement. “No, it’s okay. I’ll be fine.” I can tell she’s upset, but I can’t do anything if she doesn’t want to come with me. Disappointed, I shove my hands into my pockets.
“Are you sure? It’s no hassle.”
“I’m fine, Cage.” Blair smiles, but it lacks luster, and I start to wonder if last night was nothing more than a dream. I really want to toss her over my shoulder and carry her down to my truck, but I doubt she would appreciate that.
“Okay. I guess I’ll see you later then.” I hate how desperate I sound; how upset I am that a girl is turning me down, but this isn’t just any girl. This is Blair.
“Bye,” she whispers, looking down at her hands. Turning on my heels, I see Amanda, who gives me a bitchy smirk and a wave.
“Buh, bye,” she says and follows behind me as I walk out the door. I’ve barely stepped into the hall, and she’s closing the door behind me.
Fuck, this feels wrong, and yet there is nothing I can do about it.
Moving at a sloth’s pace, it takes me forever to get to my truck and even longer to get to my condo. Once home, I head straight for my bedroom, but I’m cut off in the kitchen by Murphy.
“So, where did you stay last night?” He wiggles his dark brows at me.
The fucker knows good and well where I was and is only trying to bait me.
Blinking slowly, I stare at him like he’s stupid. “You know where I was.”
He grins. “Yes, with nerd girl. Now tell me, was she a virgin? Part of me says she was, but I want to be certain, can never just assume.”
I clench my fist, wanting to drive it straight into his nose. “I didn’t sleep with her, asshole, and even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you.”
“Ooo,” he fakes a cough, “is someone catching feelings?”
“Murphy!” I growl, already pissed from the confrontation with Amanda.
His brows pinch together, and the playful expression disappears. “What’s up? Did something happen? I was only messing with you.”
“Yeah, I know, but I’m in a shit mood, and I need a shower, something to eat and a nap.”
“Did something happen with Blair?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know. Nothing happened. I took her back to the dorms and put her to bed. She asked me to stay, and we slept, nothing more than that. Then her roommate showed up, and it was a mess. For once in my life, I’m actually regretting being a manwhore.”
Murphy’s face becomes stone-cold serious. “Ahh, shit. Don’t tell me you’re getting attached to her. You said you were just friends, dude.”
“We are, and I’m not. I just… I care about her is all. I don’t know. Forget I said anything. I’m going to go shower.”
“Sure, but if it makes you feel any better. I like Blair…”
“I hope you mean like as in friends,” I interrupt and shoot daggers at him.
He chuckles. “Fuck, you’re in deep, man, and yes, just as friends, though, if shit ever goes south with you two, let me know, and I’ll…”
“Do not finish that sentence or so help me god, I will kick your fucking ass,” I snarl, which only makes Murphy laugh harder.
Rolling my eyes, I head for my bedroom and ignore the laughter that follows me down the hall. Walking into my room, I slam the door closed and click the lock into place. I pull out my phone and go to my messages.
My fingers itch to text Blair, but I shouldn’t. I don’t want her to think what happened last night was anything, even though I know it was. It was huge, not only for her but for me too. It was the first night I did something for someone else. The first night where I wanted to give instead of take.
Throwing myself down on the bed, I type the words out that I want to say.
Me: I wish you would’ve come with me. I hated leaving you there with Amanda. She’s such a bitch.
I wait a second, then another just staring at the screen waiting for her message to come through, but nothing appears. Shaking my head, I push up off the bed.
Maybe Amanda ruined everything after all. Maybe my reputation has finally caught up with me.
Defeated, I throw my phone onto my mattress. It barely has left my hand when it starts to ring. Even before I pick it up, I see Nerd flash across the screen. I make a mental note to change her name in my contacts before I answer the phone.
“Hey–”
“I changed my mind. I want to stay with you,” she sobs into the phone.
“What happened? Why are you crying?” Fucking Amanda.
“I’m fine. I just… can you come back?”
“I’m on my way.”
“Okay, thank you.”
I hang up the phone and half run back outside. Murphy yells after me, asking where the hell I’m going, but I ignore his question. Blair needs me, and I’ll be damned if I’m not there for her. Driving back to the dorm, I keep wondering what Amanda could have said to make her cry. Or maybe it isn’t Amanda at all? Maybe something else happened? The thought sends me into a tailspin.
When I reach the dorm, Blair is already standing out front. She climbs into the truck as soon as I pull up to the curb. The very first thing I notice is that her eyes are puffy and red, and her glasses are a little fogged up. It makes me want to pick her up, take her into my arms, and make sure everything is okay.
“Please, tell me what’s wrong. Did Amanda say something else?”
“I’m just tired, and Amanda wouldn’t leave me alone, and then my brother called and told me something that made me upset. I just… I wanted to get out of there.” She looks down at the floor.
“Okay, do you want to tell me what’s going on with your brother?” I grip the steering wheel.
“Not right now. Can we just go to your place, please?”
“Sure.” I try to hold on to the thought that she called me to pick her up and not to the part where she is still hiding something from me. I can’t expect her to tell me and trust me about every little thing. We aren’t an item, we’re just new friends.
Besides the occasional tiny sob, she stays quiet during the short ride back to my place. Her d
iscomfort is eating me up inside like a cancer. I hate seeing her like this. Normally tears don’t get to me with women, but Blair upset, her eyes misty, fuck, it’s like someone is stepping on my balls.
“Want to watch a movie with me? Maybe order some sandwiches?” I ask, hoping to be able to distract her a bit. “There is a small bakery three streets down. It’s really good, and they actually deliver for lunch and dinner.”
“That sounds like exactly what I need right now.” She beams.
As soon as we get to my place, I order some food, and we get comfortable on the couch. She doesn’t sit close to me, which kind of pisses me off. I would honestly prefer to have her in my lap, but really, I just want her close.
I turn on an Adam Sandler movie, hoping to lighten her mood, but when I glance over at her, she isn’t even cracking a smile. Her arms are tightly wrapped around her torso, almost like she is hugging herself. She looks so lost...so sad.
“Blair,” I say, and her eyes find mine.
They are still red, and tears are already forming again behind her glasses. I scoot closer, wrap my arms around her waist, and pull her onto my lap.
Perfect. This feels perfect.
Her slender arms come around my neck, and she pulls me closer as well, almost as if she knows she needs the same thing. Burying my face in her hair, I breathe deeply, breathing her in, wanting to feel her deep in my lungs.
“I’m sorry I’m such a downer today. I promise it’s not your fault. I don’t want you to think this is about what we did… ah, yesterday.”
“I figured if it was because of that, you wouldn’t have called me, of all people, but I would really like to know what’s going on.”
“Okay, I’ll tell you. Maybe then you’ll understand why I am the way I am too.” She pauses and takes a deep breath as if she is getting ready to tell me her whole life story. The crazy part is, I want to hear it. I want to listen to her ramble and listen to her tell me some story about when she was a kid. I want to get to know her, to hear the good and bad times.
