by J. L. Beck
“Earlier, my brother called me telling me about my mom’s new boyfriend. Well, ex-boyfriend. He left her last night, cleared out her bank account with it.”
“Shit, that’s fucked up.”
“The worst part is that this is the kind of thing that happens to her all the time. It’s not even that shocking. Growing up, I watched my mom have a revolving door of men that never stayed, only used her, used us is more like it,” she grumbles before continuing, “my mom never learns, she falls for the same kind of guy over and over again. Every time it’s the same. The guy is nice and charming at first, inserts himself in our lives, then leaves, taking a little piece of my mom with him. That’s why I’m like this… broken because I’ve always told myself that I won’t be like her.”
Fuck, she was right. This does help me understand. This makes everything crystal clear. Now, I see her in a completely different light.
“That’s why you poured the beer over my head that night. Why you were so against getting to know me. Why you would rather hide in your room than go out and see the world, meet people, or maybe even a guy.”
She nods. “I don’t want to end up like my mom.”
“You won’t, Blair. I promise. I’ll make sure of it.”
And I will. I’ll do whatever I can to prove to her that she isn’t going to turn out like her mother. If she trusts me enough to tell me this, then I’ll do my best to make sure she never gets her heart broken.
17
Blair
In my haste to get out of the dorm, I didn’t even pack anything to wear to bed. I was more worried about my school stuff and clothes to wear to class, not to sleep.
Cage brought me to the guest room and gave me one of his shirts to wear after I told him about it. It’s so big on me, it looks more like a dress, but the fabric is super soft, and there is something nice about wearing his clothes. I feel closer to him, and every breath I take makes it seem as if he’s right here.
Taking off my glasses, I place them on the nightstand before I crawl into the bed and pull the cover over my exposed legs. The pillow smells freshly washed, and I briefly wonder who does Cage and Murphy’s laundry. I bet they have a maid. I don’t see either one of them mopping the floor or scrubbing the toilets.
Closing my eyes, I force my mind to shut off and try to sleep, but the bed feels so cold. Great, I slept with him in my bed once, and I already can’t sleep alone. Tossing and turning, I tug the sheet up to my neck.
With my eyes closed, my mind does anything but shut down. It wanders to yesterday and how he held me at night and before… how he touched me, made me feel things that I’ve never felt before. The mere thought of it has me rubbing my thighs together. I never thought it could feel like that. So intense, all-consuming, and all he did was use his fingers on me.
Ugh, I can’t even grasp what actual sex would feel like. I’d probably never leave the bed. Once the thought has entered my mind, it doesn’t want to leave. I can’t stop thinking about how he touched me, the way he held me last night, the way I feel when I’m near him, and how my heart seems to beat a little faster.
I know I should be wary of him; he’s slept with a lot of girls, and he clearly has commitment issues, but he’s different with me. I know it. I feel it.
I don’t know how long I lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, but it definitely seems like a long time, maybe an hour. That’s when I’ve had enough.
This is dumb, I obviously want him, and he wants me. It’s just sex. It doesn’t have to be more. I don’t have to get attached. We can be friends with benefits.
That’s a thing, right?
Yup, it’s a thing. It’s totally a thing.
Throwing the blanket off my legs, I climb out of bed. I’m going to do it. I’m going to sleep with him. My insides turn hot at the thought. I’m going to seduce Cage Wilder. Me, the virgin with little experience, is going to seduce the all-knowing.
Reaching for my glasses, I stop short of grabbing them. I shouldn’t put them on. They’ll be in the way. Deciding to leave them, I open my door very quietly and peer into the hall. My heart is galloping in my chest.
It’s now or never. Stepping out of the room and into the hallway, I close the door behind me. The house is eerily quiet, and I shiver, my nipples pebble against the thin fabric. Butterflies fill my belly.
My eyes aren’t terribly bad. I can see plenty without my glasses, but in the dark hall, I have to use my hands to feel along the wall.
By the time I reach his door, my hands are clammy, and I’ve tried to talk myself out of going to his room five hundred times. I reach for the doorknob, the brass is ice cold on my heated skin. Breathing deeply, I turn it and push the door open.
The room is quiet, too quiet.
It’s even darker in here than it was in the hallway. Heavy drapes block out most of the light the moon offers.
I tiptoe into the room, inching closer to the bed, where I see Cage’s large frame in the center of the mattress.
I start to crawl onto the bed, the soft sheets rubbing against my skin as I do. Cage stirs, his huge body turning toward me, and that’s when I catch the contours of his face. That’s when I realize this is not Cage at all.
Like a cat touching water, I jump off the bed with a loud scream. I stumble back and fall flat on my ass. I screamed so damn loud that I make my own ears ring.
“What the fuck?” I hear Murphy’s voice, the moment before the light is switched on.
Squinting my eyes, I try to get adjusted to my surroundings. I’m still confused and disoriented when Cage comes storming into the room, obviously wakened by my scream.
“What the hell? Why are you in Murphy’s room?”
“I…” My cheeks feel as hot as the sun.
“I’m pretty sure she was trying to sneak into your room and walked in the wrong room.” Murphy chuckles like seeing me on the floor, my face the color of a ripe tomato is amusing.
Cage’s sinister gaze swings between us. Does he actually think I’d come on to his friend? It’s time to own up to what I was doing.
“I didn’t mean to come in here. I thought this was your room.”
Thank God the shirt he gave me is long. Otherwise, I would’ve flashed Murphy my bits. The harsh lines in Cage’s face smooth out, and he looks relieved. He thought I was going to come on to his best friend.
“This is epic.” Murphy moves to the edge of the bed. He’s shirtless and in a pair of boxers that hang low on his hips. Muscles for days reflect back at me, and I realize then that Cage is dressed similarly. Jesus, I’m surrounded by GQ models.
“Shut the fuck up!” Cage orders, pointing his finger at Murphy.
“I wasn’t going to say anything.” He chuckles, but the smirk on his face gives his lie away. He was totally going to say something.
Probably something crude, with a sexual innuendo attached.
Cage looks down at me with a smile that causes a fire to stir in my belly and offers me his hand. I take it and climb to my feet, my embarrassment only grows because now Cage knows what my intent was, as does Murphy.
It’s official, I’m a mess. Also, I should’ve stayed in my cold bed. At least then, my cheeks wouldn’t be burning, and I wouldn’t have to face Cage.
“Changed my mind.” Murphy snickers as we walk to the door. “I do have something to say. I want to make it known that this is the first time I’ve ever had a girl in my bed where she wasn’t screaming in pleasure.”
“You’re an idiot.” Cage tosses the remark over his shoulder before guiding me out of the room. Grabbing the door handle, he slams the door closed before Murphy can respond. I hold back a grin. These two are so full of themselves.
Without a word, he grabs my hand and tugs me toward his room. Just outside the door, he stops, turns, and looks down at me. His throat bobs, and his eyes shine with uncertainty. I can tell more now than ever that he isn’t used to this. Taking things slowly, asking before taking, or giving. The girls he’s used to aren’t anything
like me, and they want one thing and one thing only.
“Are you sure about this?” he whispers softly.
Am I sure about this? I don’t know, but I worry if I turn around now, I may never get this chance again. I want this with Cage. He sees me, and I see him, the real him, the one no one else gets to see, and that means something, even if he doesn’t realize it yet.
“I want you,” I say, almost shyly. Cage’s eyes flicker with heat, and I know the words have set him ablaze. He wants this, wants me, has for a long time. I bet he never stopped wanting me even after I poured the beer on his head.
“There isn’t any rush, Blair,” he says, twisting the doorknob. He opens the door and motions for me to walk in. “We don’t have to do this. Sex can wait.”
I walk into the bedroom, and Cage shuts the door, closing us inside. He walks over to the bed and flicks the nightstand lamp on, illuminating the room with a soft glow.
“Who is to say I was coming in here for sex?” I try and lessen the embarrassment I’ve endured so far by playing coy.
As soon as my eyes adjust to the light, I peer around the room. It looks nothing like I expected it to. There isn’t any garbage, or clothes littered on the floor. It’s actually clean and smells like him, earthy with cinnamon. There’s a queen-size bed against the far wall with grey sheets and a matching dresser on the adjacent wall.
A TV is mounted to the wall above the dresser, and there’s another door, which I assume leads into a closet or bathroom. I walk over to the bed and sit on the edge of it, bouncing a few times. It feels soft, but firm like I could sink into it.
“Now that you’re done looking around the room like it’s an HGTV episode, tell me why else you would be coming into my room.”
I snort and decide to play dumb. “To cuddle?”
Cage stalks toward me, his eyes are hooded, and when he pierces me with his gaze, I shiver. The intensity in his green eyes steals the air from my lungs. Tipping my chin up with his finger, he forces me to look at only him.
“Don’t play dumb with me, Blair. Is this what you want? Do you want to give me that sweet cherry between your legs?”
Swallowing thickly, I try to come up with a response, but there aren’t words to convey how much I want this, so instead, I shut down my thoughts and rely on my actions. Reaching for the band of his boxers, I tug them down.
That’s all the incentive he needs before he’s on me, his hands in my hair, his lips on mine, sealing both our fates. Easing me back, he presses me into the mattress. I can feel every inch of his muscled body against mine, and I need to feel him skin to skin. Possessed with need, I push against his chest, wanting to put just enough space between us so that I can get rid of the shirt I’m wearing.
Pulling away, he breaks the kiss, and I let out a soft whimper of protest.
“Shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have jumped on you like that...” he starts, but I shake my head, wanting to banish any worries from his mind.
“Stop. You did nothing wrong. I want to feel you, skin to skin,” I say while reaching for the hem of the shirt. I start to lift it up when Cage swats my hands away. A boyish wink is given, and then, he’s performing the job of removing my shirt. Up and over my head it goes, he throws it behind us, and it lands somewhere on the floor.
Drinking me in like I’m a fine wine, Cage’s eyes fill with a hunger I’m not sure I can sedate. My core tightens at the look he’s giving me, and my nipples harden.
“You’re so fucking beautiful. I don’t deserve you. I really don’t,” he whispers, and I wrap an arm around his neck and pull him down on me.
His lips touch mine again, and it’s like a match has been lit. It’s like I am fire, and he is gasoline, and when we come together, we start a fire that will consume both of us.
Manic with need, he peppers kisses along my jaw and down my neck, dragging his teeth over the sensitive flesh and alternating between sucking and nipping on the spot right above my throbbing pulse. He kisses me until I’m helpless and whimpering.
He moves lower, dragging his mouth down, his lips find my breasts, and he sucks on the rosy tips of my nipples, eliciting sparks of pleasure from deep within my center. Swirling his tongue, he sucks one nipple while rolling the other between two fingers.
Raising my hips off the mattress, I signal my need to him.
“Cage, please, touch me. Please…” My fingers sink into his hair, and I hold his face to my breast, never wanting him to stop.
Releasing my breast with a pop, he kisses a path down over my belly until he reaches my hips, where he places a kiss on each one. My chest is heaving, and I’m burning with need. I’ve never felt so worked up in my life. I’m strung as tight as a bow, and I need Cage to release the arrow to remove the tension.
With an experience that makes my cheeks burn, he spreads my legs wide enough so his hulking frame can fit between them. Then he drops to his belly and peers up at me.
“I’m going to touch you, but it’s not going to be with just my fingers. I need to taste you too, see if you’re as sweet as you smell.”
“Yes, please!”
I’m far too overwhelmed and needy to be embarrassed, and my lips part on a moan when he presses my knees back against my chest and licks me, ass to pussy and back again. He feasts on me like I am air, water, and his final meal.
“Fuck, just like I’d imagined,” he growls against my folds, his tongue working some type of voodoo magic on my clit. Sucking and licking, he flicks the tiny bud until I swear, I’m going to start shaking.
When I’m on the verge of an orgasm, he pulls away and brings two fingers to the entrance of my pussy. I’m so wet, my arousal coats my thighs, making it so his fingers slip inside with ease. There’s a slight burn and stretching. I feel fuller than I’ve ever felt before. I whimper as he gently moves his fingers, pumping them in and out, giving me time to adjust while also preparing me for his cock.
“You should see yourself, see how pretty your pussy is with my fingers inside it. I can’t wait for my cock to be in there.”
“Please,” I beg, unsure of what I’m asking for. Do I want him to fuck me? Touch me? Make me come? I want all of those things, right now.
Ignoring my plea, his movements remain leisurely. Each stroke of his fingers is precise, touching the exact spot he intends. Upping his pace, he moves faster and deeper, rubbing at some special spot at the top of my channel.
“Come for me, come on my face. Soak me, baby.” The words are muffled by my folds, but they do their job.
Lifting my hips, I grind my core into his face. Cage chuckles or I think he does, but I can’t remember anything after his lips close over my clit, and he starts to suck. The combination of his mouth and his fingers working me over sends me into oblivion. Rattled to the core, my entire body shakes, and the orgasm zings through me like a lightning bolt.
My entire body tightens, and I clench onto his fingers, half holding them inside while half trying to push them out. The pleasure is so great that I drop my hands onto the mattress and hold onto it to keep myself in place.
A moment later, as I’m drifting down from my high, Cage gently withdraws his fingers and rises up from between my legs. His lips glisten with my juices, and I’m mesmerized by him. He towers over me, looking like a god, his body sculpted from stone.
Reaching for him, I run my hands over his chest and down over his well-defined stomach. I trace over each ab, which moves with each heaving breath of his chest.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” His voice comes out breathless.
“Yes, I want this. I want you,” I say without giving my brain a chance to think up a reason why I shouldn’t want him.
Lifting me by the ass, he scoots me up the mattress until my head reaches the pillows. His body blankets mine, and I conjure up the strength to look down at his cock. It swings between his legs like a bat, and the mushroom head glistens with a bead of liquid.
“Fuck, stop looking at me like that. This is your first tim
e, and I need to take you slowly, not fuck you straight through the mattress.”
I almost laugh, but it catches in my throat when he parts my legs further, and the head of his cock brushes against my entrance.
He’s going to break me. Rip me in half.
Fear starts to rise up inside of me, and I grab onto his shoulders to secure myself. He presses a kiss to the corner of my mouth and pulls away an inch, his eyes scanning my face.
Lifting a brow, he asks, “Birth control?”
I nod. “Yes. I’m on the shot.”
“I’ve never gone bare with anyone, but I want to with you. Are you okay with that or do you want me to put a condom on? I’m good with either.”
“No condom is fine,” I tell him, nibbling on my bottom lip with worry. Even as scared as I am to do this, I don’t want anything between our bodies. I want to feel him, every inch of him.
Nodding, he positions himself on his forearms and lines up our bodies. Cage swipes his thumb across my trembling bottom lip. His eyes become two emeralds as he looks down at me, watching my face for any type of reaction.
“I don’t want to hurt you, but there isn’t any way around this.” His words come out strained, and I realize then that his entire body is trembling. I can’t imagine the effort it is taking him not to plow into me right now. He’s used to girls falling onto their backs and taking them hard and fast, and for the first time in his life, he’s slowing down.
“I know. I don’t care. I want you.”
Lifting my leg, I dig my foot into his ass, bringing him closer. Pressing the head of his cock to my entrance, he slowly slips inside. Feeling stretched but not in pain, I urge him forward, my lips parting, and my heart racing out of my chest as he moves another glorious inch inside me. There is a pinch and a sting of pain that moves outward like a wave. Above me, Cage grits his teeth, and his eyes fall closed for half a second before they blink open again.
Leaning down, he kisses me deeply, reminding me how much he cares for me, and how much we both want this.
