Frankie and Joely
Page 15
‘Where’d you get them?’ he says.
She gives him a stare that she knows he’ll never see.
‘They’re my dad’s aviator sunnies. He’s a pilot.’ She’s not even sure that pilots wear sunglasses like this, but she banks on Rory not knowing either. Besides, if she acts sure enough, he’ll be impressed because he has this thing about her being from the city.
‘Cool,’ he says and she smiles, loving that she was right.
He takes her hand and pulls her back towards him. ‘Don’t go.’
‘You can walk me back to the chemist. But then I have to get the bus back.’ She pulls away.
‘I’ll dink you on my motorbike,’ he says. ‘If you kiss me.’
Frankie laughs. ‘I don’t kiss for payment.’
Rory shrugs. ‘It’ll be pretty hot on the bus.’
Frankie takes his shrug and raises it with her own. ‘Yeah, I don’t care.’
When they get back the metal sign is outside the chemist advertising discounted photographic prints. Frankie smiles, wondering how many people actually bother printing their photos anymore.
‘I’ll wait here,’ says Rory.
Shrugging, Frankie pushes open the door and steps inside.
Rory watches her through the gaps between the letters painted on the window. She walks around grabbing things, reading them and putting them back. The way she moves makes him want her. She’s like a new drink he hasn’t tried yet.
Lighting a cigarette, he leans against the window and looks down the street.
‘Can you lend me twenty bucks?’ Frankie leans out the chemist door, her hand out, no embarrassment on her face.
‘Depends …’
She gives him a look that makes him take out his wallet and count whatever he has.
‘Eighteen sixty. That’s it.’
‘Thanks.’ Her hand closes over his and scoops the money away, and Rory knows no matter what he does, she won’t make it easy for him.
Frankie counts out the money at the counter, hating that she had to ask Rory for some and knowing it will come back to haunt her. She wishes she could turn around and see him through the window to catch him looking. Frankie knows it would be a mistake to let a boy like that get too close too quick. Besides this holiday was supposed to be about her and Joely hanging out.
‘Can I get a receipt?’ She wants to show Joely where all the money went.
Expecting Rory to be gone when she pushes back into the heat, she’s surprised that he’s still in the same spot she left him.
‘Why are you always where I am?’ says Frankie, wanting a real answer.
‘Maybe you’re always where I am.’
Shrugging, Frankie wonders why it all seems to be floating away from her: this holiday, her friend who only knows bits of her, and this boy. It’s all so fleeting and she can’t hold onto it.
If she’s lucky the bus will be pulling up just as she gets to the stop. If not, she might be sitting in the sun for another hour. As she walks around the corner, Rory still at her side, she sighs when she can’t see it. She could just ask Rory to dink her, but then she’d owe him that plus the eighteen dollars she’s borrowed. It’s too much. Instead, she kisses him, right under the bus shelter with an old woman watching. She lets him slide his hands across her bum again, thinking that it might cover some of the money she owes and thinking how like her mum she actually is.
She lets him go, and sees Rory looking at something over her shoulder. She turns to see what it is, wondering what could possibly make him smile so strangely.
‘Hey Mack, enjoying the view?’ yells Rory with a smile.
‘Fuck,’ Frankie says to nobody. She starts smoothing down her skirt, terrified it might be up at the back, but knowing that no matter how much she fixes it, she’s already exposed.
She looks behind, hoping Mack’s gone, but he’s staring, like he’s accusing her of something and she’s pretty sure she knows what of.
Thinking about Mack telling Joely before her makes Frankie anxious because he’ll use it as proof that Frankie is all the things he thinks she is, and she worries Joely will listen. It’ll be just like what happened with Jamie Marks at the school dance. Frankie becomes suddenly too aware of how long she’s been gone, and the only thing she can think about now is that she has to get back fast to shut Mack up. But what if she’s too late?
‘You have to go Rory, please,’ she says.
Rory tries to pull her close again. ‘Why do you care if he sees us?’
‘Please.’
Rory shrugs and leans forward to kiss her. Frankie ducks, so he misses.
She considers hurrying over to Mack and asking him not to say anything, but she sees Mack pull on his helmet, and she knows he’s heading straight home.
‘See ya tomorrow,’ Rory says as the bus pulls up and he slinks off, lighting a cigarette, leaving Frankie to hop on the bus with all of her shopping.
The only seats left are on the sunny side. Frankie takes one at the front to avoid passing a long line of glares. The seat is hot. She tucks her legs under her and tries not to sit back against the melting vinyl. The bus takes off and she is tossed around like she’s on a ride at an amusement park.
As the bus drives down the main street, she sees Rory laughing with a blonde girl. He’s touching her bare shoulder. Frankie turns to see them, but the bus turns too, and Rory disappears. She wonders who the girl is, and that starts her wondering about all the things she doesn’t know about Rory. The way he seemed to enjoy being caught by Mack comes back to her, and fear starts spreading through her. She was the one who said this holiday would be all about her and Joely, and now she’s been caught with Rory when she was supposed to be going to the chemist. Quickly, she makes herself stop thinking, but for some reason, all she sees is Thommo’s face. She remembers the gentle way he talks to her, the way he makes her feel, and she realises that it’s not Rory she wants to kiss at all.
She hears Mack’s motorbike roar past and tries to look out the window, but the sun is so strong she can’t open her eyes.
Now she’s worrying about Joely, and Thommo too, and hoping she’ll beat Mack home. She wonders what he’ll say, whether he’ll tell them. She could tell Joely, but she doesn’t want her thinking that Frankie is using this holiday as a way to meet boys, so she has to get to Mack first.
The old tree is coming up on the left, so she stands up and calls to the driver to stop. There’s a squeak of brakes as the driver responds.
She hears Mack’s motorbike, but can’t see it as she hops off and runs up the long driveway towards the house.
Chapter 28
Five unanswered text messages. Where could Frankie be? Surely the chemist has to be open by now. It’s after lunch.
Joely knows she shouldn’t snoop in Frankie’s things, but she can’t help herself. She’s bored, she hurts all over and she can’t believe her friend is taking so long. Before she starts she shuts the bedroom door, just in case someone comes. She draws the curtains, too, and then has to turn on the light because the room is really dark.
The red bikini is sitting on top of all of Frankie’s stuff in the drawer. She’s glad it’s on top and not buried in with her undies and bras. Before she can think about what she’s doing, she pulls it out and strips off carefully, to avoid touching her blistered skin. She decides not to look at herself in the mirror until she has the bikini on. The top doesn’t really fit because she has smaller boobs than Frankie, but she pulls hers up to try to make them look bigger. Frankie once showed her that trick, but she hasn’t used it until now. The bottoms are just a bit too big too, which surprises Joely. She always thought they were about the same size in jeans.
She tries to look in the mirror, but all she can see are the top straps. She pulls her bed out from the wall so she can stand on it and see how the bottoms look. But she still can’t check out th
e whole look and that’s really what she wants to do. She decides to go to the full-length mirror in Jill’s room.
It feels weird running down the hall in Frankie’s bikini and Joely’s not sure she could actually go outside. It just feels so tiny, so exposed. Not like her one piece and her rashie top that pretty much covers her body.
Jill and Ged’s bedroom door is open. It’s always open and Joely’s happy about that. It’s like they don’t have anything to hide. Her mum always shuts her door. Even at night when Joely’s in bed, she hears it click shut.
When Joely was really little and used to come to the farm with her mum, she sometimes got to sleep in Jill and Ged’s bed. She could never work out where her mum was, but later Jill told her it was because she was trying to give her mum a rest. If Joely got sick, or if she had a nightmare, Jill would carry her in and tuck her between them, Ged snoring and not waking up, and Jill cuddling her until she went back to sleep. She can still remember the feel and smell of the sheets: crisp and vanillery. Just the sight of the bed now, makes her want to curl up and sleep. Maybe then her skin wouldn’t hurt so much.
She tiptoes across the carpeted floor to the cupboards. Everything in Jill and Ged’s bedroom is wood including an ancient chest of drawers that belonged to her grandmother. Her mum still mentions it sometimes like she’s never quite recovered that things were willed to Jill instead of her. Joely sneaks in front of the mirror. The first thing she notices is how white and unfreckled her stomach is. It doesn’t match the rest of her body. Hidden away under layers of clothes, it never sees the sun. Not like Frankie’s perfectly brown stomach that makes Joely ache with envy.
She takes in the rest of her body, horrified at the sight of the blisters forming on her arms and neck. She tries to focus on the red lycra, determined not to see the bikini as she’s seen it on Frankie, but just look at it as it is. But she can’t. She feels like a little sunburnt girl in her mum’s high heels.
As she hurries back to her room, desperate to get changed and bury the bikini back in the drawer, she crashes straight into Frankie.
‘Joely, what—’ starts Frankie.
But Joely is off, sprinting to the bedroom and slamming the door. In seconds, she rips the bikini off and pulls on her own clothes, not even feeling the blisters pop on her skin. She climbs into bed, pulls her sheet up and closes her eyes.
‘Joel?’ Frankie comes in and sits on the bed. ‘Have you seen Mack?’
‘No. I don’t feel well. I’ve got blisters …’ Underneath the sheet, Joely knows she can only stall for so long. She’s just waiting for her face not to burn with embarrassment and she wishes Frankie would disappear.
‘Oh,’ says Frankie. ‘So you definitely haven’t seen Mack?’
‘No.’
‘Why are you hiding?’
Joely pops her head out. ‘Really? You didn’t see me?’
Frankie laughs. ‘Yeah. Course I did.’
Joely buries her head into the pillow. ‘Well, you’ve been gone for ages,’ she mumbles.
‘Sorry. I missed the bus and had to wait for the next one.’
Joely hears Frankie edging closer to her.
‘You can have the bikini, you know. It looked hot on you,’ says Frankie softly.
It’s all too much for Joely. She bursts into tears, crying for her friend’s kindness and for how stupid she feels that she got caught trying to be something that she’s not. She feels Frankie hug her gently and it just makes her cry harder and harder until she’s blowing snot bubbles into the pillow.
‘What’s mine is yours. You know that,’ says Frankie in Joely’s ear.
Joely’s never had a friend like Frankie: someone who shares her things and won’t let her hide.
‘Actually that’s not true. You can borrow everything except the new green coat I was just given in the op shop. Want to see it?’
Joely looks up, feeling red-faced, blistery and puffy. She nods like she’s three and wipes her nose with the back of her hand, making Frankie laugh. ‘You okay now?’
Joely nods again, not wanting to talk, worried that if she does she’ll start crying again.
Frankie hops off the bed and grabs her bags from the hall. She throws them down on her bed and pulls out the green coat.
‘Did you go clothes shopping?’ sniffs Joely, noticing all the stuff.
‘Op shopping. Sorry. I had to wait for the chemist to open.’ Frankie unbuttons the coat and slips her arms in. She keeps her back to Joely until it’s all buttoned up and the belt’s tied around her waist. ‘Ta da!’ As Frankie spins round, she smiles.
Frankie looks so incredibly amazing in the coat that Joely starts crying all over again.
‘That bad?’ says Frankie, rushing to hug Joely.
Joely manages to shake her head. ‘No, beautiful, really beautiful.’
Frankie laughs. ‘Then stop crying, crazy lady!’
‘Sorry, I’ll try.’ Joely strokes the soft leather of the jacket. ‘This is …’
‘I know, right? And the lady in the op shop gave it to me. For nothing!’
Joely looks up and finds Frankie’s eyes. She knows her friend never has any money and that she used to steal. That’s why she always pays for her now because she doesn’t want Frankie getting caught.
‘Honestly, Joel,’ says Frankie, hurt that Joely would doubt her. Suddenly, she doesn’t want to tell her anything else. She doesn’t want to tell the story of how the lady wore the jacket when she was young, and how amazing it had made her feel too. She stands up, cross that Joely’s ruined the moment. She’d never steal anything as beautiful as this coat anyway. Maybe a chocolate bar or a can of drink, but never anything of meaning. She’s tried to explain the code to Joely, but it’s one of those things her friend will never understand. Just like finding something this rare in an op shop in a town like Payne.
‘And I didn’t spend your money either. I had a few dollars that Mum gave me. Here’s your receipt and change to prove it.’ Frankie throws coins and the receipt at Joely. ‘I bought you a dress for the party. It’s in the bag. It’s blue and it will cover all the burnt bits.’
‘Frank, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—’
‘Whatever,’ says Frankie not looking at her. ‘I’m going to have a shower.’
Chapter 29
Mack takes a beer from his dad’s fridge. He doesn’t care what shit he’ll get into. He sits down on Thommo’s motorbike and drinks. The sky is as beautiful as ever, but tonight Mack just glares at the stars. Right now he hates the heat, the dusty ground and the dying trees. Even the sound of the cattle, usually cheery, makes him want to shoot them all and save them the pain of starving to death. He sculls the rest of the beer before the hot air warms it. He wants to toss the stubbie into the paddock, but he knows his dad would be angrier about finding glass near the cows than he would if Mack drank everything in the fridge.
He doesn’t know what to do. He can’t go to bed because he’ll just lie there seeing Rory’s hands on Frankie’s bum. He hears someone walking across the driveway. He stands up, ready to disappear before anyone can find him. But Frankie steps into the shed and it’s too late.
‘Mack.’
‘That’s my name.’
‘About today …’ says Frankie, hating that she has to have this conversation at all.
‘Yeah?’
‘Do you mind not telling anyone?’
‘About what?’
‘About me … and Rory,’ she says as if he doesn’t already know what she’s talking about.
‘He’s an arsehole,’ says Mack, staring straight at her.
‘No,’ says Frankie defending Rory only because she got caught kissing him, not because she doubts that Mack might be right.
‘Yeah, he bloody is. I’ve known him my whole life. He’s an arsehole.’
‘Just don’t tell—’
‘Why? Why do you care who knows?’
Frankie doesn’t answer at first. She doesn’t really know what to say. He’s right. Why does she care? She shouldn’t. Not after Joely basically called her a thief. But then there’s Thommo. And she definitely doesn’t want him knowing.
‘I just don’t—’
‘You like secrets, don’t you? My brother likes you and Joely needs you, and you’re off fucking around with Macleod.’
‘I’m not.’
‘May as well be.’
Mack picks up the empty bottle and throws it, smashing glass across the ground. Swearing, he storms away.
Staring at the shattered glass, Frankie thinks of her mum and of how she must have felt when Frankie’s dad left. She remembers when Frankie found his photo after they’d moved house again, and being embarrassed by how in love her mum looked when Frankie asked who the man was. Even after all that time why would her mum still light up when it was clear he’d barely ever wanted anything to do with her? Frankie would never feel like that. She would never be happy to be someone’s scraps.
She hears Mack’s motorbike start up. She wonders where he’s going and how much he’s been drinking. But it’s nothing to do with her anymore. After today they will probably never have a real conversation again. Thinking about him, about his coldness, Frankie’s jaw tightens. He has no right to be rude to her, to treat her like she’s just some girl in the way. It’s not her fault she’s disappointed him. He shouldn’t have hoped for so much.
Chapter 30
Joely can smell the rotting kangaroo from where she sits in the dark on the edge of the road, but strangely it comforts her. The smell is her beacon because the clouds are so thick they’ve covered the stars and made it hard to see.
She wonders if her skin will smell similar when the blisters start to burst. Dead things shouldn’t have a scent. They should dry up quickly like a fallen branch or an empty cicada shell. Not rot slowly, exposed to all the creatures choosing their next meal. She wishes now that she’d made Thommo help her bury the body properly. It isn’t right that it lies in a ditch, waiting for time to make it disappear.