For Love of Emily

by Bonnie Gardner

  She wished she knew.

  Finally, she settled on pulling her hair to one side with a barrette and let it go. She was only going to the store. She strained her ears for the sound of a car. Of course, it was much too soon for Marianne and Thad to have made the trip back from the post.

  Finally, the Harbeson’s station wagon pulled into the driveway. When she heard the crunch of the tires on the drive, Silver went to the window and watched as Marianne helped Thad out of the car. Though his progress was slow, with the use of crutches, Thad was able to make his way from car to door without assistance. As he neared the house, Silver saw that his temporary splint had been replaced by a plaster cast.

  As happy as Silver was to see Thad moving around, a wave of sadness broke over her as she realized that in short time he wouldn’t need her anymore.

  She forced a smile as she held the door for Marianne and Thad. “It’s nice to see you getting around so well, Major Thibodeaux,” she commented as the pair brushed by her.

  “Thank you, Miss Burdette.” He sounded so formal. He spoke civilly enough, but there was a touch of coolness in his tone. Was he already regretting what had happened last night? “In just a few days you’ll be free to go home.”

  “Yes, it will be nice to get home,” Silver murmured, though she didn’t mean it at all.

  She wanted to stay here with Thad and Emily.

  Forever.

  Marianne Harbeson intervened. “You go and run your errands. I’ll keep Thad company till you get back.”

  “All right,” Silver agreed reluctantly and went to search for her purse and sweater.

  The errands didn’t seem that important now. What she really wanted to do was stay. With the prospect of leaving and possibly never seeing the house or its owner again, Silver almost wished she could change her mind.

  ****

  He probably shouldn’t have sent her off like that, thought Thad as he watched Miss Burdette leave. Sylvia, he said to himself, trying out the syllables to himself. He was quite confused about the way he seemed drawn to her. She was definitely not the type of woman that he’d sought out in the past. Yet, he had been attracted to her since the first day he’d seen her at Emily’s school, and he didn’t know why.

  And why now, of all times? The last thing he needed was another complication in his recently disrupted life.

  Yes he did. There was deceptive strength in her fragile beauty. She had already proved herself capable of taking care of Emily. And him. Especially him, he thought, remembering the heat beneath the deceptively cool exterior that he’d discovered last night.

  “Thad!”

  Pulling himself back from his reverie, Thad turned to Marianne. “Did you say something?”

  “Just wanted to know if you’d like some coffee while I get lunch started.”

  “Sorry. I was thinking about something,” he said by way of apology for his inattention. “Thanks. That’d be great.”

  He’d been thinking about how much Miss Sylvia Burdette had done for them. And what it would be like to have Emily’s teacher in his life forever. And in his bed.

  ****

  Though her foray into the world had been short, the trip did much to improve Silver’s state of mind. She hadn’t noticed the confinement until she had gotten away from it. Silver had never been a gadabout, but she’d recently discovered how trapped she could feel when her freedom to come or go was denied.

  She felt much better when she returned from her morning outing. Part of her brightness was due to her high spirits and the remainder due to the sudden onset of autumn weather which had arrived sometime during Silver’s stay at the Thibodeaux home. The crisp air had rouged her cheeks and invigorated her. She hummed the tune to a song that had been playing on the radio as she retrieved the parcels from her car. She whistled as she juggled her packages and opened the door.

  “Looks like your outing really helped,” Marianne observed as she came to Silver’s aid.

  “Oh, the cold, fall air really makes me feel good.” Silver handed a grocery sack to her friend and looked around the room. “Where is our patient?”

  “In the kitchen having lunch. What did you buy?”

  “Miscellaneous groceries. I thought I’d make a big pot of soup in honor of the change in the weather.” Silver brandished a long loaf of French bread. “I even went to the bakery.”

  “I’m sure they’ll love it. Let’s get these groceries into the kitchen, and get you some lunch.” Marianne headed for the kitchen. “I’ll get you started then I’ll head on home.”

  Silver put down her parcel and took a moment to shrug off her sweater and deposit her purse on the hall table. She rummaged around in the sack that remained on the chair and pulled out two items before following Marianne.

  Thad’s back was to her when Silver entered the room. Her heart was thrumming along at a steady pace, but it skidded to an abrupt halt then sped up again at the sight of his dark hair. Try as she might to calm it, Silver was unable to control her runaway heart as it careened about, crashing into her rib cage loud enough for everyone to hear. She paused for a moment, staring at his dark hair, grown slightly past regulation length during his enforced stay home, before she could manage to say anything.

  “Obviously, you were trying to get it all finished before I got home. Thank you for being so considerate of my waistline.” Silver breezed into the kitchen, hoping that her rapid entrance would explain the breathlessness.

  “Don’t worry, Silver. There’s plenty,” Marianne said as she collected her purse and prepared to go. “Call me if you need anything.” Without waiting, she hurried to the door.

  Thad looked at Silver intently after Marianne uttered her nickname. The major’s look of concentration didn’t escape her. Had he finally remembered that night in August?

  “Silver.” Thad pronounced the word slowly as if savoring the sound and feel of it. “That’s an unusual name. I thought your name was Sylvia, Miss Burdette.” He looked thoughtful as he smeared meat spread on a cracker.

  Silver drew a deep breath. “Silver is a childhood nickname that I’ve never been able to escape,” she replied as breezily as she could. “My uncle started calling me that when I was a toddler.” How can he not remember that night now?

  “Oh! I almost forgot!” Silver fingered the items she held behind her back. Maybe she could change the subject. “I brought you something, and something for Emily, too. Just to be fair.”

  “That wasn’t necessary. I’ve imposed on you enough.”

  “I didn’t mind.”

  Silver slowly brought her hand around to the front. In it she held a paperback novel. She had seen several other books by that same author on Thad’s bookshelf.

  He accepted the book, but Silver couldn’t help noticing the way he seemed to avoid looking at her as she put the compact disk she’d selected for Emily on the kitchen counter. Thad opened the paperback and began to flip through the pages as if he wanted to think of anything but her.

  After a moment, he looked up. “Forgive me for forgetting my manners. Thank you for the book, Miss Burdette, it’s one I’ve been wanting to read.” Then he opened the book and started to do just that.

  Silver had no choice but to give up the notion of conversation and sat down to eat. When she had finished, she got up to do the dishes.

  After the prolonged and strained silence at the table, she was grateful for the clank and clatter the dishes made as she bustled about putting the kitchen back in order. Thad watched as she worked, and Silver was all too aware of his searching gaze.

  When the kitchen was straight again and the last spoon stashed in the dishwasher, Silver turned to leave the kitchen. As she walked past Thad, still sitting at the table, he reached out and captured her wrist. She stopped. A delicious tremor rumbled up her arm, but the cold words that followed abruptly turned the warm sensation into a chill.

  Chapter Ten

  “Silver is an unusual name,” Thad commented quietly. “I don’t believe I’v
e heard it but once before.”

  “Oh, really?” Silver tried to sound casual, but a roaring in her ears prevented from thinking clearly. He knows. He knows. He knows. Silver wanted to escape, but with Thad gripping her wrist tightly as a vise, flight was impossible.

  “Yes.” Thad’s words came out so as smooth it was as if they had been oiled. “I met the other Silver at a party last summer. She was not at all like you. She really knew how to attract a man’s attention, and she was not the kind of woman I’d want to have around my daughter.”

  Unlike plain-Jane me? Silver silently finished the statement. “How nice for her,” she replied icily. Her breathing slowed, but her heartbeat increased. She wanted to run, but she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her upset. Silver stood for an endless minute, held in Thad’s relentless grasp. Finally, he let go.

  “Do you need anything else, Major Thibodeaux?” Silver asked when silence seemed no longer appropriate.

  “No. You may go.” He dismissed her, the opened the paperback that had been lying forgotten on the table. He tapped the cover of the book thoughtfully. “Thank you for this,” he said again. “I’ve been looking forward to reading it.”

  “You’re welcome,” Silver replied mechanically, grateful that the subject had shifted. “While you’re reading I’ll go up and work on my grades. I need to get my first nine weeks grade averages ready for report cards. My sub will probably be climbing the walls unless I send her some more material to work with.”

  “You can tell your substitute that you won’t need her after tomorrow. I’m sure that I’ll be able to manage by myself until I return to work now that I have the walking cast, and Emily can help out even though she’s itchy.”

  Hot tears sprang to Silver’s eyes as she walked away. She knew that with Thad’s curt dismissal, she was being tossed out of his life. There would be no more chances.

  ****

  Later that afternoon, when Silver returned to the kitchen to prepare supper, she was relieved to find that Thad was not there. She hadn’t heard him go to his room, so she reasoned that he had moved into the living room since he still wasn’t up to frequently climbing up and down the stairs. Thad’s only choice was to go there where it was quiet. As much as Silver wanted to go in to check on him, she willed herself to stay out of his way. She couldn’t risk letting him remember that she was the woman he had spoken so coldly about.

  Soon the aroma of her hearty, family-recipe soup permeated the lower floor of the house. In spite of her wretched feelings on the inside, the homey smell warmed her. Silver almost felt cheerful. As she bustled around the room, preparing her meal, she discovered that she was actually humming.

  By the time Emily came down, her face dotted with dabs of calamine lotion, Silver found that she was feeling fairly content. Thad hadn’t said anything else about her name, so maybe he’d forgotten about it. She listened absently as Emily chattered on about a book she’d been reading as she put the finishing touches on the meal.

  The homemade soup and crusty French bread were an instant hit with both father and daughter. Silver had planned for copious amounts of leftovers, but she had underestimated their appetites. There was precious little left in the soup pot by the end of the meal.

  Thad pushed his chair away from the table, yet made no effort to rise. “Your soup was excellent, Miss Burdette. You are a constant source of surprises to me.”

  “Why, thank you.” Silver wondered if that was a left-handed complement. Why did she always try to read something into what he said? She reached for the bread basket.

  Emily deftly scooped her hand into the basket and plowed through the folds of the cloth that had covered the slices of bread. “Yay. I knew there was another piece hiding in there.” Munching on the last piece of crusty bread, she pushed her chair back and left the table. “Jerry Kola awaits,” she added to explain her haste in leaving the table.

  “Jerry Kola?”

  “He’s the current heartthrob of the pre-teen generation,” Silver explained.

  “How do you know all that stuff?” Thad asked as he watched his daughter leave.

  “You gotta keep up on it in my line of work. Of course, you also have to remember that the fickle minds of adolescent girls could completely change by next week.”

  Thad’s eyes steered back in Silver’s direction and stayed on her while she finished kitchen duty. She tried to ignore him, but as his piercing gaze seemed to bore into her, Silver felt a tell-tale flush creep into pale cheeks. Fortunately, the room was warm, and she hoped that Thad would attribute the color to the heated kitchen. She forced herself to finish the dishes. Though she kept her back to him, Silver could see Thad’s very muscular and very attractive reflection in the window above the sink.

  The self-assured confidence and piercing indigo eyes had first attracted Silver to Thad on that fateful night in August. Now she recognized the expression. It was the same one that he had worn as he had stalked her in the early moments of their first encounter before everything had gone wrong.

  She finished the dishes and rinsed out the sink. Silver had no reason to linger over it, yet she was reluctant to turn around and face him, but she knew she must.

  “My roommate, Carole, is coming over to pick up my lesson plans for tomorrow and my grade sheets. She should be here any time now.” Silver tried to make her comment sound casual, but it sounded forced to her. She hoped Thad didn’t notice her nervousness.

  Thad Thibodeaux continued to stare, saying nothing. He regarded her, calmly appraising her, displaying no emotion in his keen eyes.

  Finally, Silver could stand no more of his close scrutiny. She pushed the chairs neatly under the table and moved to leave the room. As she brushed past Thad’s brooding figure, Silver again found his hand barring her way. This time, he simply extended his arm to block her passage.

  Silver stopped; her heart caught in her throat. Her breathing grew rapid as her heart pounded loud enough to be heard. She forced herself to breathe normally. “Do you need something?”

  Thad’s eyes met hers for the briefest of moments. Then he apparently noticed that his arm was still barring the way. He lowered it quickly, brushing against her hand as he did.

  Neither moved for a moment. Tiny arcs of current seemed to flash between them, then slowly the electric field faded. Silver moved to pass.

  “You’re both of them,” Thad stated quietly as Silver reached the hall.

  Silver stopped. “What?” she whispered hoarsely.

  “You’re the woman from the pool party.”

  Silver wanted desperately to deny it, but she knew it would be futile. She twisted her head just enough to see him from the corner of her eye. She didn’t want him to look at her, but it was suddenly very important for her to see him so she could judge his reaction. “Yes,” she answered softly, “but that wasn’t really me.”

  The silence that followed was pregnant with unspoken recriminations, but none were voiced. Silver looked quickly down the hall toward the living room, hoping that Carole would arrive and rescue her. Why wouldn’t he say something? Anything, Silver thought desperately, the silence brittle in its thickness. Finally, she broke the stalemate herself. “Aren’t you going to say something?” Her voice wobbled and cracked with tension.

  “What is there to say?” Thad’s voice, too, showed the strain of the situation.

  “I guess, nothing,” Silver replied sadly. The doorbell rang, giving her an avenue of escape that she happily accepted.

  Thad swore softly as he watched her hurry away. How could he not have recognized her? Now that he finally had all the facts, he saw the resemblance as clear as day. Sure, the hair and the makeup were different, but the face, and the voice, and the slender body were the same.

  No wonder he was so drawn to her. Silver. No wonder the chemistry had been so strong. Sylvia. Which one was the real person? Silver or Sylvia? And which one did he want her to be? Thad stared after her departing figure, no closer to the answer than before
.

  One thing was certain. He couldn’t stay in the house with her. It had been hard enough keeping his hands off her when he thought she was merely his daughter’s demure teacher. Before he knew that she and the sensuous, sexy Silver were one and the same. And after last night, he couldn’t think clearly with Silver Burdette so close by. She had to go.

  At least, until he figured out what he really wanted.

  From her. From himself. From everything.

  ****

  “What’s wrong, Sil? You’re white as a sheet,” Carole demanded as soon as she was inside the door. She plopped down onto the couch without being invited and waited.

  “Nothing,” Silver said grimly. “Nothing at all.” She pressed her hands tightly to her head and shook it, letting go before she added, “Just everything!”

  “Well, that makes a lot of sense, kid. Care to explain?”

  “Not particularly.”

  Carole rolled her eyes at Silver in an impatient look.

  “I haven’t quite made sense of it myself yet,” Silver explained with obvious agitation.

  “Try me. It can’t be that hard to figure out.”

  “Well, it’s pretty bad.” Silver paused. “He figured out where he’d seen me before,” she stated flatly.

  “So?”

  “Apparently, I’m no longer the type of person he wants to have around his daughter.” Silver’s voice wobbled.

  “Did he say that?”

  She nodded numbly. “Almost word for word. Now his attitude has completely changed. He’s being very… Oh, I don’t know.” Silver paused, searching for the right word. “Controlled,” she finally said. “Very polite, and businesslike. He seems almost angry. And you should see how he looks at me.”

  “Maybe he’s remembering what he’s missing,” Carole remarked with a knowing wink.