Rival Dreams (Rival Love #3)
Page 6
“What is it?”
“Can you stay with your man tonight? I’m totally bringing Elliot back here.”
I almost ask her who the hell Elliot is, but I remember this is my roommate. She’s kind of a skank. I like her, don’t get me wrong, but the girl doesn’t make men work for anything. She’s always hooking up with someone so that I completely lose count and track of their names.
I chew the inside of my cheek and nod. I know! I know. I should totally sit her down and tell her to quit being so easily available, but my last attempt turned out so bad. No, really, it was monumental. Not only did she cry, scream curse, and call me every name in the book, she threw shit at me. Literally launched a freaking alarm clock in my direction, like I was the asshole who broke her heart or left her somewhere. Never again. Sometimes you just have to watch them crash and burn and hope they figure it out sooner rather than later.
Dressed in my outfit, I sit at my desk and apply a little bit of makeup. I’m pretty simple: eyeliner, a little mascara, and lip gloss. Bam. Done. I study my loose curls and decide to straighten them. I haven’t done it forever and Caleb likes my hair straight every once in a while.
After twenty minutes of running a flat iron through my hair, I do a recheck of myself, then grab my purse and coat, and my gift for Caleb, and wave goodbye to Brie, who’s applying makeup. “Have fun,” she says. “Thanks again.”
I nod and wish her luck.
I’m almost at Caleb’s dorm when I spot him outside with a group of guys and girls hanging around him. Is this why he didn’t answer me?
No, I know him. He loves me. I’m just being stupid. I march up to him and his expression slowly changes. From laughing with his friends to silence. “Skylar?”
“Hi, um … I got off early. I tried calling.”
A girl with short red hair looks me up and down with a sneer and says, “Who the hell are you?”
“Skylar. This one’s long-term girlfriend.” I sidle up next to Caleb and press my lips to his.
He smiles and wraps his arm around me. “Hey, you. Whatcha got there?” he asks, looking down at the red box in my hand.
“Gift for you. Happy Valentine’s day.”
He kisses my forehead. “Thanks. Come on. I got you something too.”
Redhead bitch glares at me and I actually stick my tongue out at her as we walk away. I know, so immature, but sometimes, no matter how old you are, you need to do things like this. It’s better than the alternative. Smacking a ho in the face, or cursing her out.
Caleb and I step inside the elevator and he mumbles, “That was Kelly. I think she’s dating Mark, or maybe it’s Dexter. I can’t remember.”
“She seemed like she’d like to get with you instead,” I mutter.
He shrugs. “She’s two years too fucking late for me. I’ve got what I want.”
“I called. You didn’t answer.”
“Yeah.” The doors slide open. We step out on to his floor and head to his room. “I didn’t want them all listening in on our conversation.”
I nod and he opens the door to his room. A part of me wants to yell, “So you couldn’t text me, then?” But of course, it’s Valentine’s Day, and I honestly don’t feel like fighting. We hadn’t fought for so long, until recently.
We enter his room, and I shrug off my jacket and lay it on his desk chair. I spin around and he is right in front of me. “I have to ask you something. Can I stay with you tonight?” I ask.
“Why do you want to stay here?”
“Um … well …” What the hell? Because I’m your fucking girlfriend and I want to stay with you. I release a breath slowly. “Brie has company.”
He nods. “Ah. Well … Kyle is going to have company tonight. So that leaves us both fucked for tonight. Unless you want to listen to Kyle getting laid.”
I shake my head. “No. Maybe we should go stay with my mom and your uncle; they’re in town.”
“I’d rather listen to Kyle getting his brains fucked out. No offense. We can get a room for the night if you want.”
I shrug. “If you want to.”
Caleb doesn’t respond. Instead he grabs a small box from his desk and hands it to me. It’s the same size of box that holds things like, I don’t know … rings. I get all excited and open it all greedy. I gush when I spot one glittery stone, and then … another. Oh. He got me earrings.
“Do you like them?”
Feeling silly, I nod. “They’re beautiful.” Of course he wouldn’t propose to me. We’re way too young for that, right?
Caleb smiles at me and kisses my mouth. “Good.” He opens up his own gift and says, “For real? How do you keep on doing this kind of stuff?” He holds up to tickets to the opening day Boston Red Sox game. It’s his favorite team. He plants one on me.
“Are you hungry?”
“I am,” I say with a smile.
“Okay, let’s get something to eat.”
Chapter 12
Caleb
Clearly, I’m a dick. I didn’t plan this night out very well. In fact, I didn’t plan it at all. We went to three restaurants; all of them asked for reservations and informed us that they were completely booked. The host at the last restaurant actually snorted at me and said, “Buddy, good luck.”
I swear, this night keeps turning into more and more shit. It’s a sign. Feeling like a useless asshole, I mutter, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, you were busy.”
I turn to her and shake my head. “It’s not okay. Don’t you get it? I did have some time. I got you these fucking earrings, but I didn’t plan shit after that. You deserve better than this, Sky. So much better. You deserve a man who looks at apartments with you. Who tells you when shit comes up. Checks on you when you come home from work just make sure you’ve arrived safe and sound. That’s what you deserve. And I used to be that man.”
“Hey, you still are.” Her hand rests on my cheek and I don’t have the balls to look her in the eyes. “Caleb, it’s going to be okay. You’ve been a little stressed. It’s fine. Everything will be fine. I love you.”
We walk a little farther, and there is this constant nagging inside of me saying, “Do it. Do it now. You’re only making this shit worse.”
I sigh. “And that’s the problem.”
She backs up like I slapped her. “What do you mean?”
“Sky, I didn’t plan one thing for tonight. Hell, if we’re going to be honest, I forgot today was Valentine’s Day. I honestly didn’t care, but someone told me you chicks love this sort of shit so I went and got you a gift.”
She nods slowly. “Okay. Well, I didn’t need anything. I love the earrings, I do. But you didn’t have to do anything.”
“That’s bullshit. You got me those fucking tickets. They weren’t easy to come by either, so don’t play it off.”
She chews on her lower lip. “Why do I feel like you’re purposely trying to piss me off?”
Because I am. I need you so mad at me you will walk away from me and never think twice about it. “I can’t … I don’t want to do this anymore.”
Her brows knit together; she looks more confused than angry. She grabs my arm and pulls me away from another restaurant. “Okay, let’s just head back and …”
I cut her off and jerk my arm free from her. “No. I can’t do this shit anymore.” I use my index finger to draw an imaginary line between us.
“What?” Tears form and fall. An ache settles in me. It has to be done, though. The longer I wait the worse this will get. I just … I love her so fucking much and I need to let her go. Let her follow her dream and accomplish it. I’ve got to do this.
I glare at her. “You heard me.” My voice is cold. I almost can’t believe how Jekyll and Hyde I can be. “I don’t want to be in this relationship anymore.”
“That’s not funny! If this is some stupid joke of yours, it’s not one bit funny!” she says, pointing at me with a shaky finger as a river of tears streams down her face.
“I’m not
joking. Didn’t you hear me earlier? I’ve been trying. And honestly, I can’t be this beck-and-call bitch anymore. You need someone else.”
She takes a few more steps back and shakes her head. “I never asked you to be that. I just … I just wanted you …”
I don’t want to hurt her any more than I already have, but she’s fighting me. I need her to give up now or I’ll cave like a house of cards. “The last couple of weeks I’ve realized the guys are right. I mean fuck, Sky, I feel like we’re married. I don’t want to be married. And what the hell was up with your gasping earlier? I mean for fuck’s sake. I know earrings and rings come in the same box, but holy Christ, you looked like I stabbed you with a knife as soon as you saw they were just earrings.” I shove my hands into my pockets and laugh. “Look at me. All this doesn’t need to be tied down just yet. Not to you. Not for life. Why the hell do you think I ditched you the day we were supposed to look at apartments? Yeah, I know I promised, but here’s the thing: I like my space. You’ve got OCD so fucking bad that if one god damn thing was out of place you’d have my ass for a week over it.” It’s not true. Sky is only OCD about her closets, books, and CDs—they have to be in a certain order. But mostly she just likes things neat.
It must have been the final nail in the coffin, though, because she storms up to me and bitch slaps me. I might have whiplash from the blow. “Fuck you!” she screams. “You brought up the idea of us living together. You should have been a man and told me you’d changed your mind. I asked you more than once if you were sure you wanted to go through with it and you kept saying yes. So don’t you dare for one second turn this around on me. You want us to be nothing to each other, fine. We’re nothing!”
“Great. It’ll be like we were the first day you came into my life.”
She turns on her heels and walks away. She’s still in my view, not looking back, which is good, because what would she think of me staring after her? I’m supposed to be the selfish prick who broke her heart, not the person who cares about her.
Skylar stops at the corners and takes a seat on a bench. I can see her body shaking. She texts someone and a few minutes later I watch her get into a car with North Carolina plates, and on the back bumper a sticker that says, “Surf’s up bitches.”
I sigh as the car disappears from my view. “Bye, love.”
The streets are full of happy couples hugging each other, laughing at possibly nothing. It only makes me realize what I’ve done. My breathing comes hard, like I’ve run a marathon. I blink back some tears that are about to fall. A tip for those of you who don’t know this: guys don’t cry in public. They avoid it as much as possible.
I rub my smarting cheek and make my way back to the parking garage. Popping the door open, I finally break down. It’s ugly, if I do say so myself. A grown man crying is never pretty. My chest heaves and a flood of tears breaks free. I drop to the ground and smack my head against the door. Yeah, there will probably be a dent, but I honestly don’t give a fuck.
My phone falls out of my coat pocket and onto the paved ground. Through blurred eyes I snatch it up and call the one person who can stop me from doing something stupid, like running to Skylar’s dorm and begging her for forgiveness. I need to be strong and stand my ground, even if it kills me. For her. That’s what this all comes down to: her happiness in the end.
Derrick answers after two rings. Yeah, I know. I’m calling the one person I haven’t really spoken to since last year. In all fairness, he’s the only one who can distract me from my mess.
“Yo yo. Derrick here.”
“What up, man?” I say, trying to hold back the ache in my voice.
“Caleb! Holy shit balls. What’s up, man? I haven’t talked to you in forever. How’re Sky and you? Don’t tell me you’re fucking getting married.”
Okay maybe Derrick wasn’t the best choice after all. The very mention of her name sends me into another spiral. I slide into my car and laugh bitterly, “Nah, man, we, uh … I … uh … broke up with her today.”
I hear some noises in the background that sound like the makings of a party. A couple of doors shut and then Derrick says, “What do you mean you broke up with her today? On Valentine’s Day, are you out of your fucking mind? That’s so completely messed the hell up, bro. Where the hell is Lance? I’m going to kick his pansy ass for letting you do something so stupid.”
“Derrick, calm down! Jesus, man. I had to do it. I just …” I start to sniffle as I recall the look on Skylar’s face. The pain I put there. Her hand colliding with the side of my face so hard you would have thought she punched me. My jaw still hurts and I deserve it. “I love her so much, but I know she won’t follow me. She fought tooth and nail to get into Duke and she’s not going to leave it when I go into the draft.”
“Dude, congrats. I was wondering if you were … but Caleb, don’t take this the wrong way, you’re a goddamn moron. Did you even ask her if she’d go?”
“You don’t get it. I can’t ask her. She belongs here. And who knows where I’ll be.”
“Okay. I just think maybe you should have asked her and let her draw her own conclusion. You two have fought this long to be with each other, I just can’t understand why you wouldn’t ask her.”
I sigh. “I was scared she’d follow me and regret it for the rest of her life. I can’t let that happen. Sky needs to finish what she started here. Without me.”
Derrick clears his throat. “I don’t know. You’re right, I guess. But how are you going to handle it? Think about it. Some other dude is going to ask her out. Might be her study partner. Might be some douchebag on her team. Fuck, it might be some dumb punk-ass bitch in one of her classes. Point is, someone’s going to ask her out. And eventually she’s going to say yes. Then what? Are you going to come charging back and stake your claim all over again?”
“No. I think it’s pretty clear I am never going to get another chance with her again.” The reality of this statement is like a knife to my heart. Tears prick my eyes and I actually let them fall. She’s the best damn thing that ever happened to me, and I just let her go. “All I can do is hope they make her happy and treat her right.”
“Jesus, man, you really did ruin it for good. I’m sorry. Look, I got break coming up in a month, maybe I’ll come hang out with your sorry ass. We’ll celebrate your going pro and just shoot the shit. Until then, man up. Quit crying like a girl. I can hear you sobbing. And tell Lance to fucking call me. Pronto.”
“Gotcha. Thanks, bro.”
“Any time. I gotta get back to the kegger.” He hangs up and I’m alone with my thoughts in a parking garage.
***
Breakfast was awkward. Skylar didn’t look at me the entire time. She drank juice only because Erin made her. Uncle Bri was a whole other story. He glared at me. A hardcore, glint-in-his-eyes kind of glare. As soon as Sky excused herself from the table and Erin followed her to the bathroom, that’s when things really took a turn for the worse.
“What did you do?” my uncle asks.
“I broke up with her.” There. No beating around bushes, let it all out there on the table.
I barely touch my eggs. In fact, looking at them makes me sick. And I thought losing your appetite after a nasty breakup was just a chick thing.
“Oh. When? You told me yesterday things between you two were fine. Were you lying to me? I get it if you don’t want me in your business, but I sort of need to know what I’m walking in on, Caleb. This situation isn’t exactly normal.”
I roll my eyes. “Last night. I broke up with her last night. And I know, of all the damn days in the world I picked the worst, but it had to be done. I can’t do this to her.”
“Did you tell her about the draft?”
“No. And why do you think that is?” I ask in the most sarcastic tone I can possibly muster.
Uncle Brian shakes his head. There are traces of silver streaked through his brown hair; I guess I never really noticed him aging until now. “So, you’ll suffer and let her suffe
r because you think it’ll somehow spare you both in the long run? Am I understanding you correctly?”
I can’t stand it when he acts like such a wiseass. Something tells me this is exactly how he’s going to be the whole day though. “It doesn’t matter, does it? It’s done. She can continue on with her dream and I’ll go down the path toward mine.”
“Oh, so you did this for her. I see now. Excuse me for still finding this to be one of the most idiotic solutions you’ve ever come up with to fix a problem.”
Why? I’d seen him do it countless times before he met Erin.
As if reading my thoughts, he sighs. “I never loved those women. None of them. They wanted more and I wasn’t ready for it. But Erin is different. She … gets me, like no other person ever could. Much like Skylar gets you. I’m not saying you had to put a ring on it to keep her.”
I look down at my lap. Erin and Sky both return to the table. Skylar drinks a little more of her juice and then blurts out, “Sorry. I have to go. Work needs me to help set up some last minute touches for a signing tomorrow.”
Erin frowns but hugs Sky. My uncle hugs her next and kisses her forehead. “We’ll see you later, then.”
Sky walks right past me and I drop my gaze so I don’t have to look at anyone at this table.
Chapter 13
Skylar
I haven’t been home since Caleb tore my heart out of my chest and stomped all over it. I haven’t eaten either. Food just seems so unappealing. My mom yells at me to at least drink juice. But how can I possibly ingest anything at all when the person who stole my soul is sitting across from me? I can’t tell my mom what’s wrong. Not right now.
I hardly believe it myself. How can he sit there? Does he have any clue how difficult it was for me to get off Kayla’s couch and come here? She offered to come for support, but I told her it would look bad, that my mom would sense something was wrong. I’m just not in the mood to hash out the details all over again.