Love Desired: Rock ’n’ Roll Heiress Book 1

by McCracken, Kelli

  “If Ayden loved me, he wouldn’t have doubted me.”

  “You know better than anyone that things aren’t always what they appear to be.”

  She was right. It was a hard lesson to learn, but one I had figured out in the end. Still, I couldn’t prove my innocence beyond a shadow of a doubt, and the thought of Ayden still not believing me was too much for me to handle.

  As much as it hurt me to think things were over between us, another thought plagued my mind more. It wasn’t just the fact that my ex-boyfriend had managed to sneak someone inside my suite. It’s what the guy did while he was in there.

  Had this mystery man disposed of the condom because he’d used it?

  Chapter 16

  Mia

  A gentle breeze blew my hair across my back as I adjusted myself on the stool. It was hard to focus on my computer screen when the arena was full of life. Most of my staff was busy prepping for the public concert that was scheduled for this evening. I wanted to be involved in those preparations instead of chained to my laptop. If I were busy, maybe then my mind wouldn’t be plagued with horrible images.

  My cheeks grew hot as I thought back to the night I confronted Wesley for sneaking someone into my suite. He was the reason I had to go to the emergency room and have a rape kit performed. He was the reason I laid on that hospital bed, ashamed to meet my doctor’s eyes because of the examination she was doing.

  Even though she spoke kindly to me, the fact that I had to go through with any of it left me feeling ill. So did the fact that I had to wait for the results. No more than fifteen days is what they promised, but to me, it felt like a lifetime.

  We gave the surveillance footage to the sheriff, hoping he could ID the man that had entered my suite. I couldn’t think about the possibility that something could have actually happened. I kept telling myself that there wasn’t enough time. Not knowing was even worse than knowing. I physically didn’t feel any different when I woke up, but I couldn’t take the chance.

  I turned toward the right-hand bar, to the spot where Ayden and Bentley always sat. Both were having a few drinks as they faced the bar with their backs toward me. From what I could see, Bentley had stuck with beer, but Ayden was drinking shots.

  Refocusing on my computer, the heaviness in my chest made it hard to breathe. Ayden hadn’t made any attempt to talk to me or send any text in the last three days. Now that I had the codes changed to my suite, he wouldn’t be able to use the key I gave him anymore. Not that he would. He didn’t want to be around me.

  My lip trembled. I rubbed my hand over my face hoping Andi wouldn’t notice. I should have known better. When I glanced at her, she was looking at me. The dip above her brow deepened.

  “Are you okay?”

  I shrugged. My voice was clogged from the sadness choking me. I didn’t know how to answer her anyway. Nothing about this made me feel good. I was miserable, and there was no sign of the pain easing up.

  “You should tell him.”

  I shook my head at Andi. “Like he’ll listen? He’ll think I’m making it up so I won’t look guilty.”

  “Then let me tell Bentley.”

  “No!”

  I meant to say the word harsher, but it came out in a whisper. This wasn’t the first time Andi begged me to let her tell Bentley that I’d gone to the hospital later that night after she and I watched the surveillance recording. Hell, she tried getting me to call Ayden while I was there. As if getting tested for sexual assault wasn’t bad enough.

  “It’s going to come out later anyway. You have to bring it up to the board.”

  “Then I’ll deal with any questions or comments at that point. Maybe then I’ll be ready. Right now, I can’t. It hurts too much.” I swiped at my eyes, hoping to keep the tears I felt from falling. “Why didn’t I listen to myself? I knew history would repeat itself.”

  “The game is the same, but the players have changed. The past is the past. You can’t do anything about what happened before, but you can still salvage your relationship with Ayden. He bought into Wesley’s lies. You’ve done the same.”

  She was right. When the truth came out, Ayden would realize he’d been wrong. If he sought my forgiveness and wanted to work things out, I had to forgive him. I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t.

  Forgiving him wasn’t the problem. My faith in him was shaken. How could I get past that?

  How could I not?

  Andi’s halfhearted laugh left me confused. Was there something about this situation she found somewhat funny? “Are you laughing?”

  “Of course not. I just think it’s funny that all this shit blows up as soon as Izzy shows up. It never fails.”

  “I let her get to me. It caused a strain in my relationship with Ayden. I guess in a way, I doubted him before he doubted me, but I didn’t think it would come to this.”

  “Even though we have proof Wesley is up to something, my gut tells me Izzy is involved in this too,”

  “She was the main reason D and I split up. It’s a lot like this situation with Ayden and me, except this time, I look like the cheater.”

  “Holy hell.” Andi slapped her hand against the bar. “We’ve been waiting for them to set you up the way they did before, but they changed roles this time. That’s why we didn’t see it coming.”

  The more I thought about what she said, the more I realized how right she was. “Oh my god.”

  “What?”

  I glanced past my laptop to the glass of water I had sitting behind it. “The night I got sick, I had a conversation with Izzy right before I started feeling weird. I hadn’t heard her approach. In fact, I didn’t know she was standing close to me until I glanced away from my computer.”

  “What did she say to you?”

  “She was bragging about how she could have Ayden back if she wanted him. I tried my best not to argue with her, but she kept provoking me.”

  Andi’s head tilted to the side. “What does this have to do with what we’re discussing?”

  “Everything. While Izzy and I were arguing, I closed the computer and grabbed my glass for a drink. I noticed that her drink was right beside mine. Do you think …” The scenario playing through my mind seemed too grand to be real. Then again, this was my sister we were discussing. When it came to Izzy, anything was possible.

  I didn’t miss the way Andi’s jaw dropped as she made the connection. She covered her mouth a second later. “She put something in your drink, didn’t she?”

  “I think so.”

  *

  Ayden

  I swished the last of the tequila in my glass as I motioned for Max to bring me another round. It was my newest routine. Drink tequila, get shit-faced, go to my suite, and pass out. It made the evenings go by quicker, but it did little to help me through the day. Not one had gone by without me running into Mia.

  For me to expect anything less made me a fool. I’m the one who’d fucked things up between us. It all started with Izzy’s arrival. It snowballed from there.

  The version of Mia I fell for wasn’t the version Wesley was painting. The woman that held my heart would never cheat on me because that woman had been cheated on. This time, it appeared she was the cheater.

  As much as I fought to deny it, I couldn’t ignore what I saw in her eyes the night she confronted him. Pain. Tremendous pain. I hadn’t noticed the same thing in Izzy the night she returned and lied to me about her abuse. That thought alone is what stuck with me since all of this happened. I couldn’t shake it.

  I wanted to believe Mia. It beat the alternative, but at this point, I didn’t know what to think. All I knew for sure is that someone had been in her room and a condom was in the toilet.

  God, this was a mess. I hated it. It was my own damn fault for letting down my guard and allowing a woman close to me. Why did I keep making the same stupid mistake?

  Max set two shot glasses in front of me as I pushed the thoughts from my mind. “Might as well bring a couple more. These won’t be here long.�
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  “Will do.” Max regarded Bentley then turned to fulfill my request.

  As I put the shot to my lips, I sensed Bentley staring at me. Instead of looking his way, I tipped back the glass and drank every drop of the liquor. The burn wasn’t as intense as the first couple, and the thought made me smile. I was on my way to getting what I wanted. Wasted.

  “Take it easy on that stuff. Tequila’s a mean bitch. She’s sneaky and packs a hell of a punch.”

  “I know. I want it to knock me out.”

  “You’re gonna feel like shit in the morning. Drinking won’t fix this.”

  “This isn’t fixable.”

  “Not with that attitude,” he mumbled as he took a drink of his beer.

  While I didn’t doubt he was concerned about me, I knew why he was reacting this way. Andi. Mia was her best friend. She defended her against Wesley and confirmed Mia’s story.

  There was no denying I’d do the same for Bentley, but could I say the same if he was guilty? It’s why I couldn’t trust what Andi said either. Still, I didn’t doubt my friend was trying to be the hero and save the day by convincing me to make things right with Mia.

  “You’ve made it clear to me that you think Mia’s innocent, but have you considered how you would feel? Imagine if I told you I saw someone going into Andi’s room.”

  “Ayden, stop.”

  “No,” I grumbled. “You need to understand why I’m having a hard time with this. Put yourself in my shoes.”

  “I’ve said this once, and I’ll say it again. Why would Mia cheat on you?”

  “Maybe because something better came along.”

  Bentley twisted off the cap of another beer and took a long drink. He mumbled something right before he did, but I hadn’t been paying attention. Max brought my next round of shots and set them next to the empty ones. After he grabbed the used glasses, he left to help another guest further down the bar.

  Ignoring Bentley’s piercing gaze, I took another shot. A few more might be enough to erase the images in my head. As much as I didn’t want to think Mia had betrayed me, all I kept imagining was her and Wesley fucking.

  A familiar perfume invaded my nose as I placed the glass back on the bar and looked around. Mia and Andi were standing a few feet away. Neither was looking our way, but I was able to catch part of their conversation.

  “I’ll catch up with you later. I need to greet one of the bands that just arrived.” Mia waved to Andi then turned toward the main entrance. Part of me wondered if she would glance at me, but she kept her eyes forward, disappearing into the hallway a moment later.

  When I noticed Andi, she was gawking at me. As soon as she realized I’d caught her, she shook her head and concentrated on Bentley. “I just came to say hi. There are a few things I need to do backstage before the show starts. I’ll find you once I’m finished.”

  “Sounds good.”

  When Andi leaned in to kiss him, I grabbed my last two shots and stood. Even though I was happy that Bentley had someone in his life, I couldn’t help resenting him when that fact was rubbed in my face. He wasn’t doing it intentionally. If anything, Andi was. Maybe she was hoping it would remind me of what I had with Mia. She was right. It did remind me, and it made the tightness in my chest increase.

  Working my way through the crowded bar, I went to the same spot Mia and Andi once occupied at the end of the left bar. It wasn’t the wisest choice considering Mia would walk by me at some point. So would Andi. They often went backstage during public concerts.

  I hadn’t thought things through. All I wanted was to get away from Bentley and Andi’s public display of affection. Once I sat on the stool, I downed another shot then motioned for the bartender, Shawn. When I had his attention, I pointed toward the last glass and motioned him to bring me two more. After he gave me a thumbs-up, I finished the last one.

  “Dude, you’re going to kill yourself.”

  Bentley’s voice grated my nerves. Why didn’t he just go with Andi and help her backstage? It wouldn’t be the first time. No, he was too busy minding my life for me.

  “A little alcohol never hurt anyone.”

  “Maybe not, but you’re not drinking a little. Isn’t that your sixth shot?”

  I nodded as Shawn prepped my order. “I have number seven and eight heading this way. You can join me if you want, unless you’re gonna bitch about how much I’m drinking.” I looked him up and down. “In that case, you can go follow your girlfriend.”

  “Fuck you, dude,” Bentley flipped me off as he sat on another stool. “Just because things are messed up between you and Mia doesn’t give you the right to be an asshole to everyone else.”

  “Then quit acting like my dad. Let me drink if I want. Who gives a shit what I feel like tomorrow? It’s my problem.”

  Bentley didn’t respond. Shawn approached with my shots and handed them to me. “Yell if you need something else.”

  “Will do.” I picked up the shot, but Bentley grabbed my wrist, almost causing me to spill it. “Watch it, man.”

  “Ayden, you’re acting like a high school kid that just lost his first girlfriend. Stop this shit.”

  I laughed. “Chew on your own words. Fuck you.”

  Shaking his head at me, Bentley grew quiet. We sat there for the longest time just him drinking his beer and me enjoying shot number seven and eight. It felt good to have a moment’s peace.

  After I ordered two more shots, something caused me to glance toward the main entrance. Maybe it was out of habit. I didn’t know for sure, but what I saw made the ache in my chest worse.

  Mia. She had come back to the arena alone. I assumed she was meeting a new band, but I’d been wrong. She was just greeting a group that had been there at some other time. I’d witnessed her do it on several occasions. Recurring guests never took long to check in.

  “You know every second you spend apart from her, you’re giving Wesley what he wants.”

  “This whole thing is complicated, Ben. Why can’t you get that? Be my friend, damn it.”

  He slapped his hand against his chest and leaned closer to me. “I am your friend. I’m trying to help you, Ayden, but you’re not listening. You’re stuck on this idea of Mia cheating.”

  “Save it, man. This was inevitable. I’ve never been good enough for Mia.”

  “Bullshit. You and Mia were happy until that asshole decided to mess with your head. And mark my words. Izzy is involved in this. I’m willing to bet money.”

  “I wish we were going on tour already.”

  Bentley scoffed at me. “What the hell would that solve?” He waited for the bartender to hand me the shots and walk away before he continued. “If you leave for the tour before sorting things out with Mia, you’re going to be impossible to be around. Why put yourself and everyone else through that.”

  “Maybe I’ll take your place and make the same wager you made with Jason and Ryan. I can go out on tour, get back to our music, and have fun.”

  It was a nice thought, no matter how much of a lie I knew it was. Bentley knew too. He rolled his eyes and placed his hand against his forehead.

  “Talking to you is like talking to a brick wall. Hell, at least the wall would listen.”

  “I’d pick a wall over a conversation with you too. At least the wall wouldn’t badger me.”

  Shaking his head, Bentley grabbed a bottle from the new bucket of beer he’d brought with him when he followed me. I was glad that my comment hadn’t offended him enough to make him leave. I hated being negative. It’s like someone had taken over my body and was speaking words for me.

  The same thing happened when I spoke with Mia about this situation a few nights ago. Hell, every time I talked about it, I couldn’t control the nasty words coming from my mouth. I was angry, and sadly, most of it stemmed from my relationship with Izzy. Knowing as much left me with one question, one that was tormenting my mind.

  Was I unfair to Mia because I was still angry with Izzy?

  Chapter 17
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  Mia

  My heart sank when I noticed Ayden was no longer sitting at the bar. Maybe it was just as well that he wasn’t. I’d been an idiot to let Andi get to me. After everything she said to me earlier, I had considered coming back to talk to Ayden. I’d made up my mind to tell him about my trip to the hospital and the fact that I thought my sister had drugged me.

  It was my last chance to save our relationship. Now it was gone. At least I thought it was until I noticed him across the bar. He was sitting near the spot where Andi and I usually did our paperwork in the evening. Bentley was with him, and both were in a deep conversation.

  As much as I wanted to go to him and ask him to speak in private, the stern expression on his face said whatever they were discussing shouldn’t be interrupted. There was no guarantee that he’d agree to talk with me anyway. I’d give him a few minutes and see if his face softened, or I’d wait until Andi came to get Bentley.

  Sitting on a stool near the main entrance, a familiar stench penetrated my nose. I glanced up just in time to see Wesley walk inside the main doors. He stared me up and down as if he were going to attempt a conversation with me, but as soon as I narrowed my gaze, he went to the other side of the bar.

  As he flirted with one of the guests, I hurled daggers into his back. Even though they weren’t real, I pretended they were. Part of me wished it too. Death would be the only thing to get him out of my life for good.

  Yet I wasn’t a murderer. My conscience wouldn’t allow me to hurt someone and not feel terrible after the fact. I wasn’t a violent person. Wesley was the only one who’d driven me to the point of using my fists to deal with someone. It only happened after he’d hit me, as well as wrecked my relationship with Ayden.

  The mere thought of him had me looking in his direction. When I did, I saw something I wasn’t expecting. Ayden was looking toward me this time.

  I fought the urge to go to him and beg him to talk. If we got to the point where we could discuss all of this, I wanted him sober. After seeing him consume several shots, I knew he was far from it.