Calamity @ the Carwash (Parson's Cove Mysteries)

by Rose, Sharon

  I waited until Reg had devoured two muffins before I said, “I imagine you heard about Prunella?”

  “Prunella?” His beer was now finished but he still had muffins to go. “What about Prunella?”

  “You didn’t hear that someone beat her up and she’s in the hospital?”

  Sheriff Smee stared at me. He was silent for several seconds. There was shock in his face but also a look of sadness.

  “Nobody told me, Mabel.” He quickly stood up. “I’ll be right back.”

  He returned with two more beers and stood one in front of me. I made no protest but quickly downed the small portion I still had left. Flori would never forgive me for this.

  “So, tell me about it. How do you know? Is Maxymowich keeping in contact with you now instead of me?”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s just that I’m the one who found her. That’s why I know.”

  “You found Prunella? Where?”

  “Well, I went to her place and when she didn’t answer, I opened the door and called. I heard someone moaning so I went into her bedroom and there she was. I thought she was dead. She was just lying there, staring up at the ceiling and there was blood all over the side of her head. I called the ambulance and after Fritzy and Herman took her away, I checked out her house. At least as much as I could before Maxymowich arrived.”

  “Hmmm. So they didn’t even call the local sheriff. How do you like that, Mabel?”

  “I personally think it’s totally unfair. To tell you the truth, Reg, I think you and I could solve this murder faster than any of those city cops could. Anyway, guess what I found at Prunella’s?”

  He smiled. “So, you think that you and I could solve this case?”

  “Of course, I do. We’ve solved other cases, haven’t we? Why couldn’t we solve this one?”

  “Without Captain Maxymowich finding out?”

  “Obviously, it would have to be done very discreetly. But, Reg, don’t you want to know what I found at Prunella’s?”

  He tipped his bottle and I waited.

  “You win. What did you find at Prunella’s? Couldn’t be the murder weapon because I have that here.”

  “You have the brick that killed Bernie here? Like, right here in your house?”

  He nodded. “Yep. I was the one who sent it to the lab for prints and I’m the one they returned it to. It is now in my safekeeping until the trial.”

  “Does Maxy know?”

  Another guzzle. “Yeah. Had to tell him. The only reason it’s here is because there weren’t any prints on it at all. Everything was all smudged.” He laughed. “Wasn’t that generous of him? Leave something with the old sheriff to guard so he’ll feel important. Hey, I know – how about something that means nothing.” With that, he tipped the bottle up and drained it.

  “Can I see it?”

  “You want to see the brick?”

  I nodded.

  Reg shook his head and grinned. “Mabel,” he said, “You’re a bit on the morbid side, you know that?”

  “You know I am, Reg. I’d like to have a look, that’s all.”

  He hauled himself off the chair with a few more grunts than were necessary. However, when a person is full of self-pity, I’ve found he tends to do that.

  “Okey-dokey, Mabel. You sit tight and I’ll bring the brick out for you to see. Mind you, you can’t touch it.” He stopped and looked at me. “You’re sure you want to? I mean, most ladies get a little skittish around murder weapons.” Then, as if he’d told the funniest joke in the world, he burst out laughing.

  “Oh right, that’s only ladies. But, Mabel, you’re one of the best old girls there is.”

  I watched as our noble sheriff turned and walked a bit unsteadily towards the door. If he returned with more beer instead of the brick, I would have to as nonchalantly as possible, knock them over and spill all the beer. Sheriff Smee was definitely past his limit.

  Thankfully, he returned with only the brick. A heavy clear plastic bag with information attached protected the brick inside. Reg handed it to me and sat down.

  “There it is, Mabel. An ordinary red brick. The kind you see all over Parson’s Cove. You know how I know? I went into every yard in this town and checked them out.”

  “What about the blood? They identified it? It was Bernie’s?”

  “Yep, it was Bernie’s all right. And, Biscuit’s.”

  “Could they tell who was killed first?”

  “Oh, they’re a smart bunch, Mabel. The dog was killed first but not by much.” He took the package and pulled the plastic tight so I could see the dark dried blood. “They can tell it’s a dog’s blood and they can tell that Biscuit was probably killed about an hour before Bernie.”

  I stared at him. “Biscuit was killed about an hour before Bernie?”

  “That’s right.”

  “So, there goes my theory out the window.”

  “What was your theory? You figured someone was attacking Bernie and the dog interfered and ended up dead too and then the murderer dumped the dog?”

  I nodded. “That’s pretty much my theory. That seemed to fit somehow. Now I have to get my head around the dog being hit on the head before Bernie. Why? Who would murder a lazy sweet dog like Biscuit? I don’t even think he barked, did he?”

  “Not much. I hear Murray is devastated. Erma was talking to Beth about him. Beth thought it would help if Erma joined this book club thing so she invited her.” He shrugged and tipped his empty beer bottle up. There must’ve been a couple of drops because he smacked his lips. I could see him eyeing my half-empty bottle so I tipped it up and guzzled the whole thing down. I’m learning that I should not do this because I’m sure I swallow half a bottle of air with it. The wind that blew out from my mouth and nose when I was finished almost knocked the empty bottle down.

  Reg smiled with appreciation. “You sure know how to drink beer, Mabel. Can’t get Beth to join me for some reason. Course, she does like a nice glass of white wine once in awhile.” He drifted off into a momentary dream world. I imagine thinking about Beth either daintily sipping her white wine or letting out an earsplitting belch.

  I stood up. “Well, I guess I’d better be heading home, Reg.”

  He looked down at my feet. “Might be a good idea to put your sock and shoe back on.”

  “Oops. Guess I’m not used to downing two bottles of beer so fast.” I sat back down and pulled on my sock and shoe.

  “You never told me what you found at Prunella’s place, Mabel. Actually, you never even said if she was dead or alive. I’m surmising that she must be alive, right?”

  “Oh yeah, I guess I got distracted with that brick.” I stayed sitting. “I hope Prunella will be okay. She looked like she was dead to me but Fritzy got there in time.”

  “She’s going to want to thank you for saving her life, that’s for sure. You did a good thing, Mabel. So, what did you find in her house? Something to link her to the murder?”

  “I don’t know if it links her to the murder but it links her to something. I found a pouch with a roll of money and a small packet with some white powder in it.”

  “Really? What was in the packet and how much money are we talking about?”

  “That I don’t know because the Captain walked in and took everything.”

  “I’d say the white powder was cocaine. That means she’s buying and she needs cash. I wonder where Prunella would get money to buy drugs.”

  “Right and if it was legitimate money, why wasn’t it in the bank?”

  “This definitely implicates her in something and it doesn’t look good, Mabel.”

  “I guess that’s something we’ll have to check out, Sheriff Smee.”

  “Yes, I think we will, Deputy Wickles.”

  My heart skipped a beat. “You mean I can be a real deputy?”

  “Nah, I was just joking.” Then, I guess he saw how disappointed I looked because he said, “You can pretend though, Mabel.”

  I trudged off home, pretending to
be thrilled.

  Chapter Twenty One

  It was almost ten when Flori called. She was all excited about her book club.

  “Oh Mabel, I wish you could’ve been there. It was so much fun. And, guess who came? Erma! She seemed quite preoccupied at first but about half way through she relaxed and really had a ball.”

  “That’s great. I’m glad for Erma, Flori. Did she say anything about Murray? How he’s doing?”

  It took a minute or two for my friend to remember.

  “No, I don’t think she said anything. Of course, she was talking mostly with Delores so I couldn’t hear what she was saying. It was so much fun, Mabel. You have to come next time. It isn’t the same when you’re not there.”

  “Flori, if you were having so much fun without me, why would you need me there? I think it’s good for you to do things on your own once in awhile.”

  Perhaps I should have worded that a bit differently. There was another moment of silence and then, a sob. I waited for the first wave of hysteria to pass.

  “Are you finished now, Flori? You know I didn’t mean that I wanted to do things on my own, right? I meant that I thought it was nice for you to be able to enjoy an evening with a group of people without me being there. That’s all I was saying. I didn’t say that I didn’t want to be with you.”

  Another wave of hysteria rolled past.

  “Flori, would you stop crying? I’m sorry that I upset you. Could we talk about your evening now? Could we change the subject? Please?”

  There were several sniffles and a long nose blow.

  “Mabel, you didn’t upset me by what you said. I was feeling so awful that you had to spend the evening all alone. You must’ve been so bored and lonely. I can’t believe that I could be so selfish and go off like that, having a good time while you’re stuck at home with all those cats.”

  “My cats aren’t all that bad. Don’t forget you’re stuck at home with Jake every night.”

  “Oh Mabel, you are so funny.” The hysterical tears turned to hysterical laughter, which brought on more tears.

  When calmness restored, I said, “Well, I didn’t exactly stay at home all the time. I did drop over to visit someone.”

  “You did?”

  “Do I detect a bit of disappointment there, Friend?”

  “No, of course not, Mabel. My only concern is what kind of trouble you got yourself into, that’s all.”

  “Flori, you don’t have to always think I’m going to get into trouble. Actually, I might even solve the murder case.”

  There was a long sigh on the other end.

  “See, Mabel. I told you, you can’t stay out of trouble. That’s why I wish you would’ve been with me at the book club meeting.”

  “I said I might solve a murder. That doesn’t mean I got into trouble.”

  “What about going over to Prunella’s?”

  “Well, I thought I should pop over to see how she was doing. There’s nothing wrong with that. No one else seems to care about her. Let’s face it, Flori, if I hadn’t gone over to check on her, she might be dead right now.”

  “I’m not saying it didn’t turn out for the best, Mabel, but let’s really face it; you popped over to see if you could find out anything more about Bernie’s murder. Admit it, Mabel.”

  “I think I know what I was doing there and how I saved her life, Flori.”

  “Okay, but I know you and I know when you’re up to something.”

  “Whatever, Flori. I don’t know why you seem to know more about me than I do.”

  “You’re an easy person to read, that’s all.”

  “By the way, I want you to promise that if you or Jake or whomever you send over to my house to check on me, finds me unconscious, please do not let Herman Wheeler practice CPR on me. Will you promise me that, Flori?”

  Flori was silent.

  “Flori,” I said, “I’m not asking for the world. It’s just that I don’t want Herman Wheeler touching me.”

  “Oh Mabel, how can I ever leave you to yourself again? One day on your own and you find another dead beaten up body. Murder follows you like sunshine follows the rain. What’s going to happen now? It’s such a tragedy.” She started sniffling.

  “No, Flori, before you start to cry – Prunella is not dead. At least, I don’t think she is. Maybe I should call the hospital to see how she’s doing. In fact, I’ll do that right now and get back to you.”

  Before Flori could discourage me, I said good-bye and hung up.

  I waited on ‘hold’ for several minutes and listened to Elvis before May asked if she could help me. May West, along with Nurse Grappley, are two hospital icons. Grappley is as intimidating as May is approachable. Everyone was certain that when computers came in, Ms. West would retire, but much to everyone’s amazement and delight, the eighty-something widow took up the challenge and kept her job. On the other hand, everyone was praying Nurse Grappley would retire and give up but it seems she’s sticking it out too.

  “May, can you tell me how Prunella is doing?”

  “Oh Mabel, I heard you found her in her little house. What a horrible experience for you to endure. How are you, sweetheart?”

  “I’m fine. I’m really concerned about Prunella though. Is she conscious? Did they find out who did this to her?”

  “I hear she’s doing quite well now. She’s lucky you came along when you did, Mabel. Such a terrible thing, isn’t it? A person never knows how they’ll handle stress until it happens to them. And, living alone like that. I’m so happy that my daughter lives close by. Who knows, I might be tempted to take drugs once in awhile too if I got too lonely.”

  “Drugs? They knew Prunella took drugs?”

  “Oops, maybe I wasn’t supposed to say anything but since you’re the one who found her, I think you should know.” She lowered her voice. “Yes, I heard she took some kind of drug and was so dizzy from it, she fell and hit her head. She was also drinking quite a bit lately so it could’ve been a deadly mixture. Such a sad story.”

  “Really? She wasn’t attacked by anyone?”

  “Oh no, she definitely denies that.”

  “She’s conscious then?”

  “Yes, she’s awake but I’m sure she has a terrible headache.”

  “Did she say what she hit her head on?”

  “I don’t know but I overheard someone say that the police didn’t find a trace of blood in her house except on her and the bed, of course.”

  “No, I didn’t either. What did she hit her head on? I doubt she’d start to bleed after she got into bed. Wouldn’t it spurt all over the place right away? You’re sure she didn’t say there was an intruder?”

  “I’m sure. She insists that she fell and hit her head on something. I doubt she even remembers what it was now.”

  “Maybe she doesn’t remember what really happened to her then either. I’d bet my store that someone hit her, May.”

  “I think you’re right. If I hear anything different, do you want me to let you know?”

  “That would be great. I can always pass the information on to Reg too. By the way, he and I are working this case together so we’d appreciate anything you have to offer. If I’m not home, call me at work, okay, May?”

  “That’s wonderful to hear that you and Sheriff Smee are working together. All I ever see around here are those police officers from the city. What’s happened to Jim and Scully? I haven’t seen them in ages.”

  “Well, Reg was at home feeling sorry for himself and I think he sent the boys off to do traffic duty. We’ll probably see a spike in parking tickets in the next few days. And, let’s hope that it is only ‘days’ and not any longer.”

  I could hear noise in the background and May said, “Gotta go, Mabel. I’ll talk to you later.”

  I hung the phone up and it rang ten minutes later.

  “Mabel,” Flori yelled in my ear before I had time to say a greeting. “What’s this about you and Reg working together? You did not tell me about that.”
/>
  “When did you hear this?”

  “You know better than to keep a secret from me.”

  “Flori, I meant to tell you about Reg and me but we got so preoccupied with Prunella, I forgot. It’s no big deal anyway. You know we like solving crimes together.”

  “First of all, it is a big deal. You were spending time with Reg while his wife was at our book club - which you knew, Mabel. It doesn’t look good to see a single woman going to visit a man whose wife is not at home. You never think about things like that before you do them. What will all the neighbors say? Have you thought of that?”

  “Flori, you have to stop bawling me out for everything. I did stop in to visit Reg and we sat outside in his lawn chairs discussing the case. Is Beth concerned?”

  There was a sniffle. “Of course, Beth isn’t concerned. I just worry about you and your reputation, that’s all.”

  “Well, if Beth isn’t worried, then don’t you be. Who told you I’d been over to Reg’s anyway?”

  “I don’t think you want to know.”

  Whenever Flori says that, I know who it is.

  “How did Esther find out? Does that woman trail me all over the place?”

  “Maybe she does. Anyway, she said she saw the two of you sitting outside drinking beer. She made sure to call to tell me. I told her she was a liar because I know that you don’t drink beer.”

  “She was close enough to hear what we were talking about? What was she doing - hiding behind the bushes?”

  “She says she just walked past.”

  “Well, I didn’t see her so she obviously was being sneaky. And, how did she hear what we were talking about?”

  “I think that came later. She called on her cell phone from the hospital. Did you say something to May about working with Reg?”

  “She was at the hospital? Man, I’m going to have to have eyes in the back of my head. I should really go and pay her a visit, the old goat.”

  “No, don’t pay Esther a visit. You know if you do that, it will end up in a big fight and she’ll cause you more harm than it’s worth.”

  “You’re right, Flori. Well, I’d better go and pay some attention to my family here. If I don’t feed them soon, they’ll start climbing my drapes. Thanks for letting me know, Flori. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”