Hotbox
Page 48
“Trevor—”
“Mom, he’s not offended. It was just a simple observation.”
She still looked a little startled. “What did you call him?”
Trevor and I both laughed. “Ty is very athletic, and guys that are into sports are called ‘jocks.’ ”
She made a face at him. “I know what a jock is, it just doesn’t sound very nice.”
“It’s just a stereotype,” I informed her, just as Kristof rejoined us on the patio. “Trevor would be considered a spoiled rich kid.”
My mom smiled, but it was Trevor’s turn to make a face. “Okay, point taken, but I don’t own any clothes like you. I wear whatever is in my closet.” He tugged on the shirt he had on, which was a short-sleeved button-up.
“You don’t like the clothes you have?” my mom asked him.
He shrugged. “Might be nice to own a t-shirt,” he replied, glancing at mine.
“You really want to dress like a sloppy American?” I asked him. “Help yourself to whatever I have.”
“Really?”
I shrugged. “Sure. I think all I have is t-shirts. I don’t think I’d miss it if you kept one. Uh, just don’t take the blue one,” I added quickly. That was one that Jayden bought me.
“Do you always dress like that?” he asked me, nodding at my attire. He grabbed an apple from the table and bit into it.
“Trevor,” my mother warned again.
It made me laugh. “No, not always, but often. I wear jeans a lot. I even have shirts like yours. It just depends on what I’m doing.”
A woman stepped through the patio doors and addressed Kristof formally in what I thought might be Russian, but it sounded different. He spoke back to her, she nodded, and then he stood.
“Excuse me. You three enjoy your day,” he smiled.
When he left I asked, “How many languages does he speak?”
My mom smiled. “I’m not sure. That was Lithuanian. That is where he was born.”
I slowly nodded. “So… Are you guys happy here? With him?”
Neither of them spoke for a moment, but Trevor surprised me when he said, “He is a pleasant man. He treats us very well.”
“But?” I prompted.
He shrugged. “But nothing.”
My mother sighed. “Kristof is very good to us, Tyler, and we would be very content here if… Well, Trevor wants to live in the United States. That has always been his dream.”
“My dream has always been to live where my brother is,” he reminded her. “Now we are away from the Derevenkos and my brother is here, so I am happy. Well, until Ty leaves us,” he added.
It sounded like an accusation and I wasn’t sure what to make of it, but my mother interceded and said, “Tyler is an American. That is his home. He can also be here for as long as he wants. He, uh…”
She didn’t sound so sure of what she was saying. Was she hoping I wanted to stay with them? How could I? I had Jayden back home, and my dad… But my mother and brother were here, and I had missed nineteen years of my life with them.
“Why can’t you guys come to the States?” I asked. “I mean if all this stuff gets sorted out, you can always come to the U.S. I certainly don’t live like this,” I motioned around me, “so you might have some adjusting to do, but…”
My mom was shaking her head. “Kristof said it was not a possibility right now.”
“Well, no, maybe not now, but in the future…”
She was shaking her head again. “He tries to give me hope, but I have a hard time believing that this will all end any time soon.”
I didn’t want to admit she was right, but what about me? Could I ever go back to my life before, knowing my mother and brother were halfway around the world? What about Jayden? Did I even have a future with her anymore? I really hated asking myself that question because the answer I feared was too difficult for me to accept.
I spent two weeks in Latvia with my family. It especially surprised me that those two weeks went by really fast. I learned so many things about my mom and brother, and realized that they even knew everything there was to know about me. Even how tall I was. She had asked, already knowing, but my mom claimed it was better to hear me share things instead of reading them.
For nineteen years my mother was only able to dream about what I was like. As Trevor got older, she began to introduce him to the idea that he had a brother in the United States. But she really didn’t know that much about me all those years. She was given a tiny piece of information about me maybe once a year—Tyler made All-Stars, Tyler graduated high school with a 3.6 GPA, or Tyler was attending college—but it was not enough to satisfy her need to know me more. Once she and Trevor were safe with Kristof, they spent hours upon hours on the Internet to find out everything they could—pictures and articles—and they printed it all out to save in a book. They showed me the book—actually there were three of them—and I was blown away. I don’t think I had even seen half of the stuff they had. However, we spent days going over everything, and they listened to every word and every story I had to share.
Trevor was one of the smartest eighteen-year-olds I knew, and his knowledge was sometimes endless. Because he wasn’t allowed to use technology most of his life, he admitted that he sometimes studied encyclopedias in the Derevenkos’ library. But when he moved in with Kristof, the World Wide Web was the most fascinating thing he’d ever come across. My mother said that he’d spend several hours a day on the computer just researching things, sometimes staying up through the night. I wasn’t dumb, and Trevor certainly had more trivial facts memorized than me, but I had still experienced way more of life than he had. I felt sorry that he had missed out on so much. He’d never even had a girlfriend before, and when he saw a picture of Jayden he almost keeled over. “Whoa!” he had said. “Does she have a sister?”
I spoke to my father twice via the Internet. It was really odd to video chat with him, but it was good to see him and I was glad that Kristof made it possible. My dad was really worried about me by week two, but I assured him that things were well and I promised him that the trip was worth my time. But for everyone’s safety, I didn’t reveal what was really going on. When I informed him that I was coming home, he was pretty excited. I had an amazing time with my mom and brother, and even though I hadn’t seen Jayden for almost nine months (besides my torturous sighting of her in May), I was desperate to at least be in the same state as her.
The flight home was really exhausting. I spent plenty of time thinking about my time with my new family, wondering how different my life was going to be from then on. Boris was a crackup and he kept me entertained for the time that I was willing to socialize. His formalities were always present whenever anyone else was near, but the moment it was just the two of us, he relaxed a little. This was our new agreement, and after two weeks of him being my ‘right hand man,’ I was almost disappointed that I wouldn’t see him again.
My father was desperate to know of the things I had learned from Olevsky. I kept it on the whole Olevsky/Meinikov/Derevenko scenario, leaving out anything that had to do with my mother or brother. He was a bit suspicious that the information took two weeks to be divulged, and that I was so vague, but he eventually let me hold on to my secrets. Since my new relationship with my father, he had subjected himself to believe that he only deserved what I was willing to give him. It was sad he felt that way, but I used it to my advantage that time.
Even though I’d kept him updated while I was in Latvia, Cole didn’t waste a second and immediately wanted a face-to-face report on my visit with Olevsky. I’d thought about it the entire way home. I had mixed feelings about everything now; I was confused and worried. I’d wanted to bring these people down because they had caused me so much misery. Drawing the line between good and bad didn’t seem so easy anymore. Kristof had reunited me with my family again. It seemed that he truly wanted me to be happy, and he told me he was willing to do what he could to make things right. On the other hand, it was because of hi
m that I was in the situation to begin with.
Cole was actually considerate. I was hesitant to share my true feelings, but when I did, he claimed to understand. I feared he would disregard my confusion entirely and insist that Olevsky was still the villain we were trying to bring down. But whatever his opinions were, he kept them to himself.
“I have some good news,” he said. We were sitting in his truck at the diner again, and we had been talking about the case for almost two hours.
“Good news, huh? The only good news I want to hear is that all of this is over,” I replied sullenly.
“Well, I can’t make that happen just yet, but I can get you to see Jayden.” He was trying to hide a smile.
“What? Are you kidding me?” My heart was racing at the thought of it. “Wh- when? Soon?”
“This weekend.”
I was speechless. I even wanted to cry. But Cole’s presence kind of deterred me. Plus he kept talking. I listened carefully to how it was going to work; Jayden and her new “boyfriend” were going out of town for the weekend.
I couldn’t concentrate on much for the rest of the week. All I could think about was what it was going to be like to see her again. But my worst fears were taking over, and I pictured her becoming very hesitant to be around me again. From everything that Cole told me, she was still in love with me, and knowing that should have made me feel more confident. But…my luck in life hadn’t been so great, so it was easy to fear the worst. I was scared of losing her. Again.
Friday came around. I had spent two hours in the truck with Cole, driving east to a destination in the mountains that seemed to be in the middle of nowhere. When we pulled up to a cabin deep in the woods, my heart accelerated beyond my control. The passenger door to another car opened…
And there she was.
Chapter Forty-Four
Seeing her took my breath away—I seriously couldn’t breathe at first. I got out of the truck tentatively; I was still worried about how she would react. But the second she saw me, her hand went to her mouth and she began to make her way toward me, slowly at first, and then she ran right to me, throwing her arms around my neck and nearly knocking me over.
“Oh, Ty,” she sobbed.
I held her tighter than I ever had before, almost afraid that I would never get to again. Just the smell of her, and the feel of her hair, and the way she held me… I thought my heart was going to burst from how much I loved her. I took her face in my hands just so I could look into her eyes again. Leaning my forehead against hers I whispered, “I love you so much, Jayden. I’m so sorry for all of this—”
She kissed me, and the passion I felt from her lips completely mended my broken spirit. I hardly even noticed that Cole and the other car had left, heading to stay at another cabin down the road. We stood there for a long time, I’m not even sure how long, but I was content with the world just stopping right then and there. I was where I wanted to be, and nothing could make me happier.
It started to rain, lightly at first, and then it turned into a downpour. We finally went inside, wet from the rain, but not even caring. I continued to kiss her, and everything seemed to fall into place again, like nothing had changed.
“So how’s your new boyfriend treating you?” I asked wryly the next morning.
She was cuddled up against me on the couch and she laughed. “Brandon? He’s pretty great,” she replied. “Did you see him? He’s hot.”
I lightly laughed. “No I didn’t see him, but I guess he’d have to be to make the story believable. They had to find someone to match your beauty.”
“You’re not jealous, are you?” she smiled.
“That depends on how often he has to kiss you for the sake of ‘appearance.’ ”
She chuckled. “Mmm, just now and then.”
“Like how often? How many times has he kissed you?”
“Fine. We suck face constantly. Our lips are locked day and night and people always tell us to get a room—”
“Knock it off!” I laughed, and she laughed with me.
“Okay, so it’s not that bad. He’s kissed me on the lips probably…a dozen times. We’ve been together for a few months, you know,” she teased. “Other than that he’ll just hold my hand, or put an arm around me. Occasionally he’ll kiss my cheek or the top of my head.”
“How tall is this guy?”
“Mmm, I’d say six-four.”
“Hmm, so he’s bigger than me,” I replied, pretending to plot.
She laughed and kissed my neck. “But you are way sexier.”
“Oh, okay. I can handle that.”
“And a lot sweeter.” She kissed my cheek, and then moved to my lips to kiss them, too. “And most importantly…you have better taste in music.”
With a chuckle I replied, “Thank goodness. Leave it to you to factor in something so trivial.”
I thought she was going to reply with a witty joke, but her expression was completely somber. “I’ve missed you so much, Ty,” she whispered before she kissed me again. “I can’t live without you. I just- I died when you left…” Her eyes filled with tears. “I swear I’m not going to ask what’s going on, but I need for you to promise me something, okay?”
I nodded automatically.
“Please don’t ever expect me to accept a life without you. Ever. It’s not possible. You have to believe how much I love you, and that I will always be yours… No matter what.”
Her eyes studied mine for several seconds, and just the amount of love they held reminded me that I couldn’t live a life without her, either.
“Promise me, Ty.”
“I promise but—”
She put a finger over my lips. “But nothing. Promise me.”
“I promise.”
She nodded. “I know things aren’t exactly ideal right now but… You gotta have faith, okay? I know we belong together, and I believe that we can make it through this. Ty, nothing is going to keep me from loving you. We’re going to be together no matter what we have to do to get there; we’re going to have a family and live a happy life. I truly believe that.”
She sealed it with a kiss, and from that point on, I had no question whether or not my life was meant for her. I did, however, feel it was necessary to talk about some stuff, especially since there were things she already knew.
“Jayden, I don’t know how much Cole has told you, but there are some things I want you to know, okay? It’s what I wanted to tell you before I left town…before…before that night.”
She was fully attentive as she nodded her head.
“First of all, I’m sorry. Sorry for starting a relationship with you when…when I really shouldn’t have. I mean I believe you came into my life when I really needed you, but I’m really sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you…”
She was shaking her head. “I’m not sorry, Ty. I loved you the first week I knew you, and I wouldn’t take back a single moment with you. Even with everything that’s happened I believe we were meant to be together. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”
Again my heart grew and I took a deep breath. “Okay,” I smiled. “At least we’re still on the same page.”
“Of course we are.”
I nodded, and then carefully considered what I was going to say next. “So… Let me just tell you that everything that happened wasn’t really my fault. I mean it was, but—”
“Cole said you’re not to blame for any of this, so don’t even try to take credit for such misery.”
Her crooked smile made me smile.
“Look, Ty… All I know is that there are some people that have been a really bad influence on your dad’s life, and it’s kind of trickled down to you. I know that you’ve had to help your dad out of a lot of sticky situations, but no matter what you’ve done, there’s still no shaking these people. Now I can only imagine who they are, but being that one of them is Dean Conlon, I can understand how awful this has been.”
“Yeah, about Conlon… Just stay away from
him at all costs, okay? Or anyone that you know is associated with him. He’s only wanted to cause me pain, and I did all this so he couldn’t hurt you.”
She nodded. “Cole told me what Dean has threatened you with. I’m so sorry, Ty. I don’t even know what I would have done if I’d been in your shoes.”
I shook my head. “I’m not even sure that I did the right thing. I just couldn’t risk having you know anything, but I felt like I could tell you just enough to get you to understand. And then that night…” I sighed. “I was so frustrated and scared that I had put your life in danger… I just thought it was better to let Dean have his way and end things with you. I didn’t feel like I deserved you anymore.”
She was crying again as she laid her face against me. We talked about it for a little longer, and I did decide to tell her more, minus the other names that were involved. She knew quite a lot as it was, so it was only a matter of filling in the missing pieces for her. It was a massive burden lifted from my chest, just having her know the truth.
The weekend was amazing, but the closer it got to Sunday evening, the more anxious I became. I didn’t want my time with her to end. And Cole was right: it was difficult, and complicated, and frustrating. I wanted to keep her forever; I didn’t want to be separated from her again. I cried when I watched her drive away with Brandon, and it felt like my heart was being torn in two.
I spent Sunday night alone in my own bed, dreaming about anything and everything from the weekend. My mind especially replayed one conversation in particular:
“Marry me, Ty. Please? Why can’t we just get married?”
I sighed. I wanted nothing more than to marry her. “We can’t right now. Not until I know certain things have been handled.”
“Why can’t we just…go somewhere we can’t be found? Ty, I would live anywhere with you.”
“I know you would,” I replied, kissing her cheek. She had made that clear several times, even to Cole. “Let me think about it, okay? I need to talk to Cole first, and see where things are at right now. And I’ll need a plan to run from your dad when he decides to kill me. Eloping with his daughter would send him through the roof.”