Good Luck Charm

by Kellie McAllen

  “Sorry, Coach, it’s just, my dad was supposed to be here with my lucky sweatshirt, and he hasn’t shown up yet.”

  She rolls her eyes so hard, I’m not sure they’re gonna go back into place. “Criminy, Kerri! Is that what you’re worried about? I’ve told you a hundred times, you don’t need a crusty, old sweatshirt to win games. You win games cuz you work your butt off during practice every day. Now quit being a moron and get your head in the game!”

  I try my best to ignore my worries and play as hard as I can, but by halftime, we’re still down by 20. Coach doesn’t let us have our phones during the games, otherwise, I’d borrow somebody’s and call my dad. I sit on the bench and guzzle down water, worrying and scanning the crowds for him, just in case he came in when I wasn’t looking.

  I’m almost done looking over the home team side when the buzzer rings. I stand up and shuffle onto the court, but suddenly a flash of green catches my eye. A man in a ball cap and a green sweatshirt is climbing the bleachers, and my heart floats up in my chest. There are white, block letters on the back of the sweatshirt, and I can only see part of it because someone else is behind him, but I’d recognize that name anywhere. O’Connor. My dad.

  The ref blows the whistle, and I look away from the stands for a second. When I glance back I can’t find him any more, but I know he’s here, and that’s all that matters.

  This may be Friday the 13th, and I may be having the suckiest day ever, but I’m gonna win this game if I have to sell my soul to do it. I steal the ball from the big bruiser who took it from me earlier and land a sweet three-pointer then take advantage of a foul to score a few more points.

  My turn-around inspires my teammates, and pretty soon everyone is rockin’ and rollin,’ even the prissy ones like Mallory who normally don’t like to run too fast cuz it messes up their hair.

  By the last quarter, we’re tied at 95, and my team is starting to slow down, but I didn’t come this far to lose now, so the moment I get my hands on the ball, I ignore the sweat dripping down my face that’s blinding me and the ache in my knees, and I barrel down the court, weaving through the other players like a vicious snake. I must look like a dangerous animal, because the other players practically jump out of my way, and as soon as I find a clear spot, I take my shot. The ball whizzes through the air in a perfect arch and swishes through the net half a second before the buzzer goes off.

  The Blazers win! I’m mobbed by my teammates who smother me in a group hug because that’s the kind of girls we have on this team, and I’m roasting and suffocating, but it feels awesome, anyway. When they finally let me go, Coach Kavanagh is there with a rare smile on her face, and she slaps me on the back, probably leaving a welt.

  “Way to go, Kerri! I knew you could do it. See, you don’t need some stupid, good luck charm to win, all you need to do is get your butt in gear and make it happen!”

  I don’t bother telling her that my dad finally showed up, I just grin and let her wiggle my bun and smack me on the back again.

  We shake hands with the other team even though they look like they want to eat us, and my own teammates start making plans to go celebrate. The crowd is thinning, and I want to find my dad before we leave, but I don’t see him. Where the heck was he sitting, and why hasn’t he come to congratulate me yet? I’m so focused on looking for him, I don’t even notice Mia heading my way till she pops up in front of me, scaring the heck out of me.

  “Great job, Kerri!” She grabs a hold of my shoulders and hugs me, and I yelp in surprise. She yanks her arms back and frowns, worried.

  “Sorry, you just scared me. I was distracted, looking for my dad.” I glance over her shoulder, still searching.

  “I haven’t seen your dad, but isn’t that your brother, Niall?”

  I shake my head, denying it before I even look. There’s no way Niall would be here tonight. He has class on Friday nights. Besides, he rarely comes to my games anymore, he’s too busy with work and college and his girlfriend.

  But sure enough, there he is, sporting recently-dyed brown hair because he thinks girls don’t like gingers. He looks so different, it’s no wonder Mia wasn’t sure if it was him.

  He heads straight towards me, and he looks like he’s trying not to frown, and my heart starts pounding again.

  “Niall? What are you doing here?”

  “Kerri, Dad’s had an accident.”

  Chapter Two

  Kerri

  My heart starts pounding, my body shakes, and Niall’s face gets blurry as my eyes start to water. I knew something bad was happening, I knew it!

  Everyone always picks on me for being superstitious, but my hunches are always right! I knew the moment I got out of bed this morning that today was going to be awful, and sure enough, my worst fears were just confirmed.

  “Is he okay? Did he… did he… die?” My voice wobbles, and I can barely squeak out the words. Pictures of my father’s rumpled body lying in the street flash through my mind.

  “No, no, Ker! He’s not dead!” Niall keeps talking, but the rest of the words just jumble together as my anxiety starts to crumble. He’s not dead; he’s okay. That’s all that matters. A few seconds later, my mind clears, and I realize Mia has her arm around me, holding me up.

  Niall shakes my shoulder. “Kerri? Did you hear anything I just said?”

  I shake my head.

  “Dad’s in the hospital. He’s pretty banged up, but he’ll be okay. He told me your car wouldn’t start this morning, and you’d need a ride home. Are you ready to go? Do you need to get anything?”

  Okay, so dad’s hurt, but he’s going to live. Deep breaths. I can handle this. I nod my head. “I just need to get my bag.”

  I wander over to the locker room in a daze. People are patting me on the back and congratulating me and raising their hands for high-fives, but I’m too distracted to respond.

  “Kerri, are you going with us to TGI Friday’s? Endless appetizers!” One of my teammates asks, but the words don’t make any sense to me, so I just keep walking.

  “Kerri, are you okay?” Other voices call. Am I? I don’t know that either.

  I grab my bag and head back out to the gym, not bothering to shower or change. Niall sees me and starts walking towards the exit. I follow Niall outside but then realize I didn’t say goodbye to Mia. I feel bad, but I’m sure she understands.

  He has a lift kit on his pickup truck, so I have to climb up to get inside. Books and papers are all over the seat, and I push them to the center to make room to sit. It smells like French fries, and I see a couple McDonald’s bags on the floor. Niall starts the engine, the truck revving loudly as he pulls out of the lot.

  “What happened?” I suddenly realize I don’t know. The radio is blaring country music, and I reach to turn it down.

  “A car ran a stop sign and hit him. He’s got some broken bones, but he’s awake. He might have to be in the hospital for a few days.” Niall runs a hand through his dark hair and lifts the corners of his lips in an attempt to smile.

  “Your hair looks weird,” I blurt out. I’ve never had a great filter, but I’m worse when I’m excited or stressed.

  Niall smirks at me. “I know. Meghan said the same thing. She said it didn’t match my eyebrows and freckles. Maybe I should dye them, too.”

  “When did the accident happen?” A worrying thought pops into my head.

  Niall sighs, and I already know the answer. “Around 1:30.”

  That means he was driving back to work after lunch. If he hadn’t gone home to wash my sweatshirt for me, the accident would’ve never happened.

  “I know what you’re thinking, and it’s not your fault, Kerri. It was the other driver’s fault.”

  “Yeah, but he wouldn’t have been on the road if it wasn’t for me.”

  “You don’t know that. He might’ve gone to Taco Bell for a burrito and got hit leaving there.”

  “Taco Bell is the other direction.”

  He sighs. “You know what I mean, Kerri
. You can’t blame yourself for everything.”

  “I don’t, only the things that are my fault.”

  Niall just shakes his head. We’ve had this conversation a million times. All of my brothers have. But they just don’t understand. They haven’t watched everything fall apart when they walk in the room like I have.

  We’re quiet the rest of the drive, and I shiver a bit in my basketball uniform. Niall turns up the heater when I hug my knees to my chest. My legs feel prickly, and I absentmindedly think that I should’ve shaved them.

  When we get to the hospital, Niall leads me down the hall to Dad’s room, and I know when we’re getting close because I can hear my brothers’ loud voices talking over each other. They start cheering as soon as I walk in the room. Not for me, for the game playing on the TV.

  “Are you watching a basketball game?” I say as I walk in. I can’t believe them.

  My eyes zoom right to the hospital bed in the middle of the room, and I gasp as I see my father lying there, bruised and bandaged. His eye is red and swollen, his lip split, and there’s a bandage on his forehead. There’s a brace around his neck, and an IV runs down into his arm. The other arm is in a sling. One of his legs is in a cast and elevated with a traction system.

  “Daddy!” I rush over to him and throw myself onto his chest. He groans and lets out an oomph, and Sean and Reid both reach to pull me off of him.

  “Careful, Kerri. He’s got some broken ribs.”

  I yelp and jump off the bed, afraid I’ve hurt him.

  Dad lets out a pained chuckle and pats the mattress next to him. “It’s okay, pumpkin. I’ve got a lot of pain meds in me. Come sit with me. Just be gentle.”

  “I’m so sorry, Daddy.”

  I lower myself slowly onto the edge of the bed and stroke his cheek, careful not to touch near his eye. My other hand reaches for his. He grasps my fingers weakly.

  The Fighting Irish score another point, and my brothers start cheering again. Even Dad turns his eyes towards the TV.

  “Daddy is seriously injured here, and all you can think about is basketball? Shouldn’t you be… I don’t know…”

  “What? Praying? Having a vigil or something?” Sean teases. “Dad likes basketball.”

  Dad nods, barely lifting his head off the pillow. “That I do. Sorry I missed your game, pumpkin. How’d you do?” His voice is weak and raspy.

  Didn’t I tell you my dad is awesome? Here he is, all messed up and probably in terrible pain, as he’s thoughtful enough to ask about my basketball game.

  I give him a small smile. “It was great, Dad. We beat the Buccaneers by two points. I made the winning shot.”

  He rubs my back. “Of course you did, Ker. I wouldn’t expect anything less from you. See, you don’t need those lucky sweatshirts.”

  My face goes still and blank, and Dad raises an eyebrow at me. “What?”

  “Well, see, I was really worried about you cuz you weren’t there, and we were down by 20, but then I saw you. I mean, I saw the back of your sweatshirt — It said O’Connor and everything. So I thought you were there, and I did a lot better.”

  “But it wasn’t me, and it wasn’t my sweatshirt, hon. So that means your change of luck was all in your head.”

  I don’t believe that for a minute, but I don’t argue with him. Maybe he had an out of body experience, and it was his spirit or something. We’re Catholic, Catholics believe in that sort of thing, right?

  “So, tell me what happened, Dad.” I run a hand through his dark red hair. Everybody in our family has red hair, but it’s all different shades. Dad’s is the darkest, then my oldest brother, Reid, then my next brother, Niall, then Sean, then me. It’s like the printer was running out of red ink and each new kid got a little less of it. If the pictures are accurate, my mom’s hair was the same shade as mine, the color of a bright, copper penny.

  “Kerri, Dad doesn’t want to talk about that right now. It’s too soon, and he’s tired. He should be resting.” Reid says, but I know that’s not what he means.

  I roll my eyes at him. “Daddy, do you want to talk about it? I’d like to hear the story if you’re up for it.”

  Dad looks at me and sighs. He can never say no to me. “I was driving down Clancy Street, and a guy ran the stop sign at the Broderick intersection. It was his fault, but I was driving fast and wasn’t paying attention. If I had been, I might have seen him and been able to stop. It’s a good lesson for you kids. Pay attention to what other drivers are doing. It’s not just your own bad driving you need to worry about.”

  “Were you late for work? Was it because you went home to wash my sweatshirt? I’m so sorry, Daddy!” I bawl.

  His face pinches up, and he rubs my hand. “Please don’t do that, Kerri. You know I don’t like that. Accidents happen, pumpkin. I don’t want you thinking any of this is your fault. Now, let’s see if the Irish can pull off this game.”

  I just nod and don’t say anything, but I still lay the blame squarely on my shoulders. I can’t help it. There’s a weird silence hovering around us as we sit for a minute watching the TV while the Irish try to get the ball from the Tar Heels. When they finally score again, the room erupts in exaggerated cheers, breaking the tension.

  We watch the rest of the game, but Dad nods off at the end, and Niall turns down the TV so it won’t wake him. None of us want to leave, but Niall and Reid have work tomorrow and need to get some sleep, and there’s not really room for all of us. Sean and I decide to stay.

  My older brothers kiss me on the cheek and walk out into the hallway, but they’re only gone a few minutes before Niall pops his head back in.

  “Kerri, Mia’s here. She’s out in the waiting room.”

  Oh my gosh! Did she follow me here? Has she been out there this whole time, waiting for me? I hustle down the hallway, following Niall. He points out the waiting room then waves goodbye.

  Mia stands up when she sees me, and we rush to hug each other. Austin is with her, too. Was he at the game tonight? I didn’t even notice him, which is kind of odd because he’s like the cutest, most popular boy in our school. I guess I was just too distracted.

  “Mia! I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were here.”

  “It’s okay, Ker. I just wanted to be here if you needed me, but I didn’t want to be in the way. How’s your dad?”

  I wince and twirl the Claddagh ring my father gave me for my 16th birthday. “He looks terrible, and he has a lot of broken bones, but he’s awake and talking. Well, he’s asleep now, but he was. Do you want to go see him?”

  She shakes her head. “Not right now, not if he’s sleeping. Maybe tomorrow. What about you, are you okay?”

  She squeezes my hand, and Austin rubs my back, and the tears well up and drip down my cheeks. Mia grabs me in a hug again, and my body quivers against hers.

  “It’s all my fault, Mia!”

  Mia pulls away from me and holds me by the shoulders so she can look at me. “No it isn’t, Kerri! You didn’t have anything to do with it. And don’t say it was your bad luck rubbing off on him.”

  I shake my head. She doesn’t know the whole story. “No, he went home for lunch to get my lucky sweatshirt, and he was late getting back to work. That’s why he had the accident.”

  She smooths a stray curl behind my ear. “Kerri, nobody blames you.”

  I stare at the ground like the guilt swirling inside me might dig a hole right into it. “I know, but they should.”

  She ignores my comment. Mia doesn’t usually argue with me when I talk about my bad luck, even though she probably thinks I’m crazy sometimes.

  We sit down in a stiff, two-person seat, and Mia wraps her arms around me and strokes my back and my head. We huddle like that for several minutes while I wallow in my guilt, sniffing and whimpering. I don’t want to act this way in front of my dad — it will only stress him out, but I can let it all out with Mia. Eventually, I wipe my eyes and sit up.

  “Thanks, Mia.” She nods and gives me a small smile.
>
  “Are you going home tonight?”

  I stand up and shake my head. “No, I think me and Sean are gonna stay.”

  “I’ll stay with you.”

  I shake my head. “No, that’s okay. There’s no space, anyway. But thanks for being here. You too, Austin.”

  He nods and gives me a salute.

  “I’ll come back tomorrow. You want me to bring you some clothes or something?”

  My first thought is of my lucky sweatshirt. It’s freezing in here, and I wrap my arms around my middle. If Dad was driving back to work, did he have it in the car with him? What happened to it? I could really use it right about now. And what about his lucky sweatshirt? Was he wearing it?

  Austin pulls off his own sweatshirt and hands it to me, and I take it gratefully and pull it on over my head. It’s big on me and warm from his body which makes it feel extra cozy, and it smells nice, too.

  I’m used to the smell of my brothers’ colognes, but this is different. It’s sort of appealing, and for a minute I envy Mia that she has a great boyfriend now. It might be nice to have a boy care about me who wasn’t my brother. Boys can be really pushy and overprotective sometimes, but it feels nice to know they’re looking out for you.

  “Thanks, Austin. I have the clothes I wore today in my bag, so I’m okay for now. Sean and I will probably go home sometime tomorrow to shower.”

  “Okay, well let me know if you need anything, and I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” Mia reaches for another hug.

  When she leaves, I go back to my dad’s room and hope that my presence doesn’t make anything worse.

  Chapter Three

  Connor

  Today is the day. Today, I’m going to suck up my self-doubt, face my fears, take a giant leap of faith, and put myself out there. Okay, that sounds way too much like an affirmation from a self-help book titled Five Ways to Be a Go-Getter, or something, but I mean it.

  Today, I am going to talk to a girl, dammit.

  And not just any girl.