Ethan in Gold

by Amy Lane

  Jonah nodded. “As long as you still want me, I’ll want to do this,” he promised, and Ethan grinned.

  “I love you so much right now! Now get inside, quick, and surprise your parents having sex!”

  Jonah groaned. “Oh God. I hate you. Go be a frickin’ hero!” And with that he got out of the car and trotted up the stairs.

  ETHAN arrived at Kelsey’s house and managed to dodge the cops in order to get inside. Christ, what a fucking mess—he’d grabbed the work gloves from Dex’s garage too, and started bagging the glass to put in Dex’s truck, but then Dex got another text, and he never got the chance.

  Dex hauled out of Kelsey’s place like his head was on fire and his penis was catchin’, leaving Kelsey and Ethan looking at each other in complete shock.

  “Oh fuck,” Kelsey muttered. “I hope Kane is okay.”

  Ethan nodded, suddenly afraid. He wasn’t the only one who depended on Dex, and Dex just didn’t work as well without Kane—they’d all seen that. Tommy and Chase were going to be daddies in the spring thanks to Chase’s ex-girlfriend, and Ethan knew for certain Tommy couldn’t do it without Dex, and Dex didn’t work without Kane.

  “Jesus,” Ethan breathed, trying not to panic. “Jesus. Okay, Kelse—it’s you and me. I’ll tell you what. You get dressed and pack your bags, and I’ll finish up in here, okay?” He looked at the mess, which was bigger than either of them, and fished out his phone. “I’m going to call for reinforcements.”

  Digger and Bobby showed up in half an hour. Tommy and Chase were there ten minutes later. Ethan almost had all the glass swept out of the couches by then, but the apartment was freezing cold. He’d set Kelsey up in her room with the comforter and a cup of hot tea, and she’d changed out of her bathrobe and nightgown into some loose sweats and had packed a bag of clothes to bring with her overnight to Dex’s house. Ethan had gotten a look at the sparsely furnished little house, though. It didn’t look any more lived-in than his own awful apartment, and he thought maybe he and Kelsey were going to be roommates for a while.

  That was okay, though. The little receptionist was scattered but kind. One day, right after Allie had left her husband, Kelsey had brought him Oreos and a toy for Felicia. He’d sort of loved her ever since.

  Tonight, after the guys got there and started vacuuming all the furniture to get any remaining glass out, Ethan went back to check on her and found she’d wrapped her arms around her knees—but barely. Her tummy was big enough by now to make that more difficult.

  “How you doin’, Kelse?”

  She shook her head, staring far away, and then sharpened her vision to his face. “I want to sleep anywhere but here,” she confessed, and her voice wobbled.

  Ethan scraped her dark hair out of a face that reminded him a little of Ryane’s, except her brown eyes were bigger and round, and her jaw was a little longer, making her face narrower and almost pretty.

  “We can do that. Dex authorized me to be your taxi—let me make sure your window’s patched and we can get you out of here.”

  The guys were making headway on the living room, and Bobby looked around appreciatively. “Hey, the guy I used to do construction for has a glazier who can come in and fix this,” he said, and Ethan blew out a sigh of relief.

  “Good—tell him to call Dex the day after tomorrow. He’s footing the bill. Are the cops all gone?”

  The guys looked out the window—which they wouldn’t be able to do when the boards were up—and the last of the cherry tops pulled out into the foggy night.

  “Awesome,” Ethan said with relief. That one guy had been giving Dex a hard time right up until Dex freaked out about Kane—and then he’d proved surprisingly useful.

  “I’m gonna get Kelsey back to Dex’s—it’s freezing in here, and she’s gonna get all shocky if we don’t take care of her, right?”

  Chase was the one who clapped him on the back. “Yeah—you go take care of her, we’ll finish up here. Bobby brought his truck.”

  Bobby walked up to them, a black Hefty bag of little glass pieces in his hands. Scott had gone to town on the big bay window that looked out from the living room—Jesus, what a mess.

  “Hey—Ethan, what’re we going to do about the windows?” Digger asked.

  Bobby answered him. “We need plywood until the glazier gets here—do we have any?”

  “I brought some from the garage,” Ethan said, but he was looking at the hole in the living room and thinking it wasn’t enough.

  “We’re gonna need more’n that,” Tommy confirmed, grimacing. “I thought you and Dex were gonna swap cars while he was at school!”

  Ethan shrugged. “Yeah, well, he forgot. Sue him. He wanted to get to cooking class.” They all stopped and shuddered, and almost like they were choreographed, they checked their phones. “If someone wants to follow me home tonight, there’s more in the garage,” Ethan finished weakly, hoping for word from Dex.

  “Jesus,” Chase breathed, “I really hope Kane’s all right. What did Dex say?”

  That lump of worry just did not go away. “Mostly ‘No, Carlos, don’t fucking go in there’—he was talking to his phone.”

  That brought a reluctant smile from everyone, and then Tommy jerked like he’d been bit.

  He pulled out his phone and they all huddled around him, and for a terrible moment, Ethan was reminded of the night Chase had been in the hospital and of how tight they all were, and of how much he cared about the guys he worked with.

  “Kane’s in the hospital,” Tommy said tightly. “His brother-in-law tried to cave in his skull. Dex says he was conscious when the ambulance took him, but he’s got to have meds and stitches and brain tests and shit….” Tommy took a deep breath and let out a sound like a snarl. “And Dex has to get Kane’s niece checked out ’cause the fucker smacked her around too.”

  “Fuckin’ Jesus,” Ethan breathed, and the rest of the guys let out a collective little moan. “Okay. Okay. One of you guys come get the plywood when you get a chance. In the meantime, let me get Kelsey home, and then I can be there for Dex when he gets there.”

  Tommy and Chase clapped him on the back and they got moving. In fifteen minutes Kelsey was belted into Ethan’s car, staring outside into the blank fog as Ethan drove them carefully home.

  “God, I really don’t want to go back there,” she muttered.

  Ethan spared a hand from the wheel for a second to pat her knee. “We’ll get it fixed up,” he said, but he really couldn’t blame her.

  “That’s not it.” She sighed. “Man, I don’t want a boyfriend—not now, with the baby coming and getting my own shit together, but….”

  “It’s not a family,” Ethan said glumly, agreeing with her. “Yeah. Best thing about living with Dex and Kane this last month—felt like family.” He sighed, acknowledging his own selfishness. “The worst thing—”

  “You’re sort of a third wheel,” she supplied for him, and he nodded.

  “Yeah. They’ve been real human about it. I just… I mean, I don’t want to live alone, you know? But I don’t want to live with just ‘Random Roommate,’ either.”

  “You want to live with family,” Kelsey said wistfully, and he could tell she wanted that too.

  “Yeah. I think my boyfriend would too, when we move out. I mean….” He swallowed. It was hard to think of Jonah at home without Amelia. “He misses his sister a lot.”

  Kelsey folded her arms and sighed. “So, boyfriend, huh? What does he think about the job?”

  Ethan shrugged and made a left onto Dex’s street. “He hates it sometimes. Sometimes he ignores it. Sometimes….” He thought about Jonah just hours before, as he’d told Ethan those guys kept you safe when I didn’t even know you. “Sometimes I think he really gets it, why I need Johnnies.”

  Kelsey grunted. “Yeah, but you know, Ethan—all the guys who’re making it work, porn’s the first thing to go. It’s like… I don’t know. Growing up or something. Leaving school behind.”

  “Hm.” Ethan parked
in front of Dex’s yard so the driveway was open for Bobby when he came to get the plywood, and then ran around to let Kelsey out. She accepted his hand out of the car, and he snagged her purse and overnight bag so she didn’t have to carry them herself.

  “Damn,” she said with admiration. “You’re quick on the draw—someone taught you well.”

  Ethan shrugged. “Four sisters. My mom sorta drilled the basics into me.”

  Kelsey’s grimace could have indicated anything from “Thank her for me” to “I know your mother was a piece of work and I’m sorry.” What she actually did say surprised him. “You know, in a way, it’s good knowing that,” she said quietly after he helped her inside.

  “Do you want some ice cream?” he asked, setting her stuff on the couch for the moment. “Pie? A glass of milk?”

  She laughed a little. “Milk and pie sound outstanding. Don’t you want to know why it’s good to know something about your mother, whom I sort of loathe, because remember? I was there after you left home and you were wrecked?”

  Ethan sighed and got busy in the kitchen with some of Rick’s cherry pie and a big glass of milk, which he set up for her on the island in the middle of the kitchen.

  “Sure,” he conceded after a minute. Dodging the point never seemed to work anyway. “Why is it a good thing?”

  Kelsey settled in on the little stool and took a bite of pie. “Omigod—Ethan! If we’re rooming together here, can you get me pie every day?”

  “Why not?” He shrugged. “You brought me Oreos when that sound system thing happened at work.” It had been during his first bottom scene, the one with Tommy. God, he’d been nervous, and suddenly his and Tommy’s sex sounds had been transmitted through the entire Johnnies office complex.

  “Yeah,” Kelsey said after a swallow of milk. “After I fucked up the sound system thing. But that’s okay. I’ll take the pie and shut up about it. Anyway, the reason it’s a good thing that your mother taught you how to be nice to women is because being nice to women is a good thing. I mean, I’m scared to death, you know?” She didn’t have to point to her swelling stomach for him to know she was thinking about her baby. “I made a lousy choice of lays, and I’m living with that for the rest of my life. What if I suck at it? What if I say the wrong thing at the wrong time and really fuck this kid up? But see, your mom—she fucked up. Man, what was going on with you when you left home, that was some bad shit. But still, she created this really awesome guy. I mean, if you can grow up decent with a family like that, maybe it’s okay if I make some small mistakes. I think if I’m good with the love here, I might not fuck this kid up that bad.”

  Ethan looked at her with a little bit of wonder. “Wow. I’m not sure what’s more terrifying—the idea that you think I’m grown-up or the idea that you think I’m decent.”

  Kelsey winked at him. “Keep bribing me with pie and that rating might go from ‘decent’ to ‘outstanding.’”

  “Yeah—but you admit the ‘grown-up’ was a mistake.”

  She took another bite of pie. “I admit no such thing,” she said after she’d swallowed and licked a little cherry spot above her lip. “You may not be totally grown-up, but I don’t think anyone feels like that. I tell my mom I’m knocked up, and the first thing she says isn’t ‘You got knocked up and you’re not married?’ or ‘You’re carrying a porn star’s baby?’—it’s ‘I’m not old enough to be a grandmother.’ I’m older than Tommy and definitely older than Chase. Girls out there younger than me have babies all the time. I think nobody feels ready, you know? It’s like, the more you know about life, the less excited you are to think you’re ready to go it alone.”

  “Yeah,” Ethan said, pondering. “It’s like, that’s why we pair off, find a mate, even if we don’t know if it’s forever and we just hope.”

  “So we don’t have to go it alone?”

  “So we have someone to grow up with.”

  She paused then, which was good because she’d hit ceramic, and he didn’t want her to eat through to the table. “So I get to grow up with the baby—that could be fun. I like babies.”

  “So do I,” he said, and for the first time in forever, he didn’t qualify that with and not in the creepy way, either. “I used to babysit my niece all the time—since, like, she was six weeks old. I’m pretty good too. I’ll help.”

  Kelsey grinned. “Awesome. Seriously—that’s awesome. I’ll hold you to that, okay? I’m gonna need that help.”

  The thought cheered them both up, and he snagged a quick bite of pie before he excused himself to go change the sheets.

  “Change the sheets?” Kelsey asked, taking the plate and glass to the sink to wash. “That bed get much action?”

  “It did today,” Ethan said glumly.

  She grimaced. “Oh God—were you—I mean, when Dex called you, were you—?”

  “No.” He rooted through the tiny linen closet, finding an extra set. Dex tended to go for white sheets with dots or stripes or something, and he was really longing for a bright set of something in gold or purple. “We were cuddling on the couch by that time, but I was hoping he’d get to spend the night.” His mouth quirked. “You know, it’s such a grown-up thing to do.”

  She half laughed. “Yeah. So it is. You ready for being that grown-up?”

  He grabbed his sheets and went in to render the bed suitable for a platonic friend. “If I’m going to give it a try, I’d like it to be with him.”

  “Fair enough,” she said, but she said it on a yawn, so he hustled to get the bed ready.

  She crawled into bed while he turned off all the lights and checked the security of all the critters. While he was doing that, he heard sounds from the garage—he stuck his head outside and waved to Bobby and Digger, who were fishing the plywood out to throw it in Bobby’s truck. They waved back, but they were obviously not coming inside, so he went back to reptile detail. He was glad Kane fed them in the morning, because that chore would suck right now, when he was tired and Kelsey would get freaked out. When he was done, he checked his phone at the charger and found a text from Dex that said something about sitting with Kane for a while, and he felt better about everybody’s favorite gorilla. Then he crawled in next to Kelsey and let her snuggle against his chest. She wasn’t Jonah, but just like Ryane, she was someone who cared. He was just damned glad sex was off the table.

  Step 7—still fixing your life

  in five easy months

  THERE was a sleeping little girl with a split lip and a black eye in the extended cab of the big shiny blue truck Ethan was driving.

  Jonah finished coming down the steps to his apartment, walked up to the driver’s side, and waited for Ethan to roll down the window. Ethan looked like handsome, well-muscled cat barf, actually. His eyes were red and he had circles underneath, his hair hung limply over his forehead, and even his leather jacket looked bedraggled.

  “So the baby…?” Jonah asked, a little bit alarmed.

  Ethan smiled tiredly. “Yeah, it was the damnedest thing. I went to bed with a pregnant woman and woke up with a kid.”

  Jonah laughed because Ethan had made the effort to crack a joke, and then he cupped Ethan’s cheek. “You look like shit. What the hell happened?”

  “This is Kane’s niece,” Ethan said quietly, looking back to make sure she was still asleep. “I guess her dad started knocking her and her mom around last night, and Kane stepped in, and there were police cars and ambulances, and now Kane’s in the hospital and Dex and Kane are daddies.”

  “You know, for a bunch of gay guys, this whole daddy thing is happening an awful lot!” Jonah said, mostly because the rest of the story appalled him. “Jesus, poor kid. Is she gonna be okay?”

  Ethan nodded. “Yeah. Dex got her checked out last night. But this morning’s sort of a clusterfuck. That’s why I called—I’m gonna need your help.”

  Jonah looked at the little girl and knew where this was going. “Babysitting?”

  “Are you up for it?”

  Jon
ah dropped a kiss on his forehead. His boyfriend, the hero. “Yeah, but scoot over. I’ll drive. You want to hit a drive-through on the way?”

  “Absolutely. My treat.”

  With a complicated little hop, Ethan popped over the center console and settled into the passenger’s seat. Jonah slid in and patted his knee. “Jesus, Ethan, you looked trashed.”

  “Yeah, well, me and Kelsey went down in the guest bedroom—that doesn’t bother you, does it?” Ethan sort of jerked himself up like this had suddenly occurred to him.

  Jonah paused. “You know, I never would have thought about it if you hadn’t said something. No. No, apparently, I am now getting the difference between human contact and a relationship, and you are off the hook.”

  “Excellent,” Ethan murmured. “I’m not sure I could have had that argument right now.”

  Jonah patted his knee again and took off for a McDrive-through and started asking questions about Kane.

  “It could have been worse,” Ethan said, “but he’s going to be in the hospital for a couple of days. Dex got home around five this morning and copped an hour or two of sleep, and then he and Kelsey went in to make sure Johnnies could run without them for a few days.”

  “Wait—doesn’t John run Johnnies? That’s what the company website says.”

  Ethan let out a little groan. “Well, yeah. He usually does. But, well, and you can’t tell anyone this, because the only reason I know is that I room with Dex, but John’s in rehab right now. Dex told everyone else he had a death in the family, but… well, I think it was worse than that. Anyway, Dex is running the place now, and he does a real good job of it—but he had to give someone the keys, and Kelsey’s going to have one of the guys pull receptionist duties for a couple of days. So anyway, he’s got to make sure the company stays right, but….”

  Ethan looked behind him to the little girl, who was still fast asleep, and then turned his attention back to Jonah.

  “See, Frances’s mom went to go bail her husband out of jail last night. Dex took her—just took her—and said, ‘If you choose Hector after they just took your brother to the hospital, you don’t get the baby, you don’t get support, you get nothing.’ See, the house we’re going to is actually Kane’s.”