SHIVER

by Tiffinie Helmer

  “You got it.”

  They shared a connection. Aidan didn’t know how to explain it, but something at that moment connected him to Fox. To cover up the swelling he felt in his heart, he asked, “What are their names?”

  Fox’s face fell, and he suddenly looked uncomfortable. “Uh…I don’t want to creep you out but…”

  “Creep me out? How?”

  Fox bit his lips and then in a rush pointed to each dog and named them. “Nanook, Kenai, Siku, Miki, Senyea, and my lead dog, Lucien.”

  Aidan was stunned and needed a moment to collect himself. He slowly got to his feet, his bad leg complaining—he’d obviously put it through too much today—and brushed the snow off his jeans. He looked at Fox who seemed apprehensive. “You named your dogs after the characters in my graphic novels?”

  “I love the Spirit of the Totem series,” Fox rushed on to explain. “I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen now that Lucien had to sacrifice Senyea. I really hope you bring her back. I loved her.”

  Aidan had no clue what was going to happen with Senyea. He had the novel halfway written but hadn’t touched it since this summer. Since his dad’s death, he’d lost the desire to write, to draw, to escape. He thought it was some kind of cosmic punishment. The gift of escapism he’d been given by a higher being to be able to deal with his father had been snuffed out with his father’s death. Ironic in a twisted sort of way.

  Raven pulled up in her Suburban along the plowed driveway. She climbed out of the vehicle, and as soon as Aidan saw her, his heart jumped. Her long hair blew away from her face with her fast gait. He just stared. This could have been his life. She could have been his wife—should have been—Fox his son, these dogs, this place. All of it. The pain in his chest flared.

  “I thought you’d appreciate a ride back. Besides—” she looked at her son “—Fox needs to get his chores done and math homework started.”

  Aidan also heard the unspoken message. She didn’t want her son spending too much time with him. Not that he blamed her. Though it was hard not to take personally. He laid his hand on Fox’s shoulder. “Thank you for showing me your team. They’re impressive.”

  Fox beamed up at him with admiration. Aidan stepped back. He couldn’t remember a time someone had looked at him that way. The burning ache in his chest flamed hotter.

  “Don’t forget our ride,” Fox said, keeping his voice low.

  “I won’t,” Aidan answered, keeping his voice equally quiet. Raven would probably have objected. Case in point, her showing up to presumably give him a ride back to the lodge, when he knew it was to bring a stop to their time together.

  He limped over to the Suburban and got in. Raven told Fox she’d be right back. Within minutes she had Aidan back at the lodge. She put the SUV in park and turned to him. “I thought about what you said. So I grabbed my dad’s old gun. I’ll have Fox draw me a map tonight, and I’ll pick you up in the morning after he heads to school.”

  “Thank you, Raven.” He wanted to reach out to her. Trail his fingers down her arm, caress her face, run his fingers through her raven hair.

  She must have read what was in his expression, for she swallowed and looked away. “Better safe than sorry, right?”

  Raven watched Aidan struggle on his way into the lodge and resisted the urge to jump out and help him. Instead, she put the Suburban in reverse and backed out, heading for home. She’d left Fox and Aidan alone as long as she’d dared. Long enough to hopefully not bring up any questions on why she was so overprotective, but short enough that no attachments would develop.

  While she’d sat in her mother’s kitchen and stewed, she’d also rethought the situation at Earl Harte’s place. If Aidan was that freaked out about someone messing with his car, she shouldn’t discount it simply because she didn’t want to believe anything bad was happening in her small town. She’d discounted the situation between Earl and her father when she’d known something wasn’t right. She’d caught Earl’s evil glare. Had felt nothing good in the man. Knew he was capable of doing something bad if provoked. Any man who could shoot his son’s dog in front of him was a man to be wary of. She’d known all this, and still, she hadn’t acted on the instincts screaming at her during the land dispute, and because of that, her dad had died.

  She’d never disregard those voices again. Not when the price was so steep.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Raven walked into the lodge early the next morning. Ever since Aidan had returned, she hadn’t had a restful night’s sleep. She was plagued with memories of the past. The way he’d made her feel, the closeness she’d felt when he held her within his arms.

  It was hard being a single parent, a self-employed artist always juggling with financial responsibilities. But that was the life she’d chosen. To dream of what could have been was a waste of time and energy. Instead of fighting the dreams, she’d forgone the sleep and spent the time in her studio. Unfortunately that left her tired and cranky. She wouldn’t be able to sustain this schedule for long before she crashed. The faster she could get Aidan out to his father’s homestead, the faster she might be able to get him off her mind and have a good night’s sleep. The more time she spent with him, the more she wanted to touch him, have him touch her. Forget the past.

  But she couldn’t forget the past. She couldn’t dishonor her father’s memory that way.

  She found Aidan in the lodge’s restaurant, saddled up to the bar, a cup of coffee cradled in his hands, a half-finished plate of pancakes and sausages in front of him. His hair fell over his forehead and brushed the collar of his soft blue flannel shirt. The medical boot looked heavy and uncomfortable clamped to his jean-clad leg. She hoped he was feeling better. He’d never told her what the doctor had said. She should have handled that situation better when they’d been in town and not let her feelings sour her mood.

  “Are you ready?” she asked, coming up alongside him.

  “Morning,” he greeted. He studied her and frowned. “Didn’t you get any sleep?”

  Now why did he have to seem so concerned? It weakened her resolve to keep her distance. “I’m fine.”

  “No, you’re not. Sit, have a cup of coffee. Have you eaten?” He continued to regard her with a troubled, concerned look.

  “Uh…”

  “Pike,” he hollered at her uncle. “Raven needs breakfast.”

  Pike gazed at her from the cutout in the kitchen. “What have I taught you, girl?”

  “Most important meal of the day,” she repeated the words her uncle had always stressed.

  He grunted. “Pull up a stool.”

  “Not too much.” She was too exhausted to be hungry.

  “You’ll eat what I cook you.” Pike pointed at her with his spatula. He was a big man, tall and wide with thick salt-and-pepper hair. Her father would look similar to Pike if he’d lived.

  “You’re pretty brave, or really stupid,” Raven said under her breath to Aidan. “Uncle Pike isn’t the forgiving sort.”

  “I heard that,” Pike hollered, arrowing a sharp look at Aidan. “If I was going to go after Aidan, it would have been twelve years ago and he wouldn’t have seen me coming.”

  “Believe me, I’m completely aware of that fact.” Aidan glanced at Raven and lowered his voice, “I’m still waiting to see if my food will stay down.”

  She gave him a smile. His eyes widened and focused on her lips. Unconsciously, she licked them and thought she heard him groan before he turned away, and picked up his coffee.

  Pike came out of the kitchen and dropped a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast in front of her. “Eat.”

  “Thanks,” she mumbled.

  Pike poured a cup of coffee and set that in front of her too. Then he leaned over the counter and looked at her. “Why didn’t you tell me what was going on at Earl’s place?”

  She turned to Aidan. “You told him?”

  “He’s head of the village council. Something happens here he needs to know.”

  �
�Listen to him, girlie.”

  Pike and Aidan on the same side? She really needed to get more sleep, either that or she was dreaming while awake. “It’s probably nothing.”

  “I hope it is, but you should have let me in on it.” He stood and grabbed the rag hanging over his shoulder and wiped down the spotless counter. “You let me know what you find out there.”

  “Yes, sir.” She scooped up a bite of egg. They tasted like rubber. Her uncle was a great cook, so she knew the eggs tasted bad because of her poor appetite. Ever since Aidan had come to town, her world, her appetite, her ability to think were turned upside down.

  “You got enough firepower?” Pike asked as though he’d just asked her what time it was.

  “I grabbed Dad’s old forty-five.”

  He raised a brow, reached under the counter, and handed Aidan his Magnum. “Here. Can’t be too careful. You could have some squatters with that place empty all these months. Though I don’t know who would be crazy enough to try and get into that dump. Look what happened to you.Your dad was one mean son of a bitch.” He motioned to Aidan’s leg.

  “No arguments here,” Aidan agreed.

  “How’d he die?” Pike asked.

  Aidan’s cup froze half way to his lips. In fact, his whole body froze.

  “Heart attack?” Pike asked. “No, he’d have to have a heart in order for that to be possible. Aneurism? Infection? Stroke? What finally did the old bastard in?”

  Aidan swallowed. “He was shot.”

  Pike straightened. “No kidding. By who? I’d like to send the fellow a thank you card.”

  Aidan pushed his cup aside and stood. “I shot him.” He threw some bills on the bar. “Thanks for breakfast, Pike. Raven, I’ll wait for you outside.”

  He turned and hobbled out of the restaurant.

  Pike looked at her. “Did he say what I thought he said? He killed Earl?”

  “That’s what I heard,” she returned softly.

  Pike shook his head. “Poor kid’s even more messed up now than he was when he left here.” Pike pointed at her. “You find out the whole story. I’m sure him killing Earl isn’t the worst of it. Be careful out there today.” He undid the ties to his apron. “In fact, I think I’ll go with you.”

  “No.” She held up her hand. “Let me feel him out. You’re too strong of a personality, and I say that in a good way. He’s not going to talk with you there.”

  “You’re sure?”

  She nodded, drank down her coffee. “Besides, if something is going on, I’d feel better if you were here watching things. Keep an eye out for any newcomers. Mom’s got a lot of reservations for this weekend, due to the snow.”

  “Good point.” He retied his apron strings and picked up his rag and once again wiped the already spotless counter. “Take care of that boy. I think he needs us.”

  Raven tightened her lips and nodded, afraid of what she’d say in response and followed Aidan out of the dining room. She found him sitting outside on one of the benches placed around the wide porch. He looked lost.

  She walked up to him, wanting to reach out and touch him, but afraid to. Afraid of how he’d take the overture and afraid that if she opened herself to him where it would lead.

  “Ready?” she asked.

  He glanced up, and she had the feeling she’d dragged him back from a dark place. “Yeah.”

  He followed her to the Suburban, Uncle Pike’s gun tucked into the waistband of his jeans. The gun he held brought new meaning knowing that he had shot someone. Killed someone. She swallowed and climbed into the SUV. They traveled to Earl’s in silence, but once there, she couldn’t take it anymore.

  “Before we go any farther, I need to know what happened. How Earl died.”

  Aidan glanced at her and then faced forward, gazing at nothing through the windshield. “There was trouble this summer. Sonya.” His voice broke on her name, but he cleared his throat and continued, “Sonya had decided to fish both types of gear, drifting and set netting, taking more of the season’s catch. To make a long story short. Earl just…snapped, attacking Sonya and a fish cop who was protecting her. He was…crazed. Insane. He went to shoot Sonya, and I…I shot him instead.” Aidan turned toward her, his eyes full of disbelief and pain. “Earl died in my arms. Just before he died, he looked at me with pride for the first time and said, ‘Son, I didn’t know you had the balls’.”

  Raven had so many questions, but one look at his face told her she wouldn’t be getting any answers. So she sat and tried to digest what he’d said. “Is this the same Sonya you asked to marry you?”

  He nodded but didn’t add anything else. Almost like he had no more to give, that it had taken everything out of him to impart to her what he had.

  “You had to stop him, or she would be dead.”

  “Yeah, too bad I hadn’t stopped him from killing your father.” Aidan got out of the Suburban and slammed the door.

  She scrambled out after him. “Aidan, wait. Stop.”

  He halted just inside the broken gate. “I don’t want to hear it, Raven. Let’s just get this over with, and then I’ll get out of your life.”

  She didn’t know what she wanted to do. Leave him. Comfort him. Love him. No, she didn’t want to love him. Couldn’t. She wouldn’t survive a second time.

  “The map. Remember?” She reached into her pocket and pulled out the surprisingly detailed map her son had drawn for her last night.

  Aidan turned back, his shoulders rigid, his dark eyes swimming with shadows. Right now he didn’t care if getting into the cabin hurt him again or worse. She didn’t want him hurt, and if there was a threat, they needed to know. She handed over the map. He took a couple of steps toward her until he could reach out and take it. The action, like coaxing a wounded animal, wasn’t lost on her.

  He glanced down at the map, his brows shooting up. “This is really good.”

  Crap. What was she thinking? Aidan was an artist, he drew characters. So did Fox. He’d drawn on everything as a little kid. From pieces of paper to the walls of their cabin. She shouldn’t have given the map to Aidan. Of course he would recognize the level of talent as Fox had gotten it from his father, not his mother. Raven considered herself an artist, but she couldn’t draw. Her medium was clay. Not pencils or paint.

  “Think you can navigate us to the cabin with it?” she asked, getting off the subject of Fox.

  “Yeah.” He glanced at her. “You don’t have to come with me. With this map, I’m good.”

  “I’m coming.” She’d like nothing better than to get back into the car and drive away. But she couldn’t. Maybe it was the sixth sense that was raising the hairs on the back of her neck, but she needed to be here. See this through. She motioned for him to start. “Lead the way.”

  “All right.” He looked around the area. “Stay in my footsteps. Whatever you do, don’t venture from my tracks.”

  “You don’t need to tell me twice.”

  Aidan turned and treaded carefully, stopping every few feet to glance at the map and his surroundings before continuing. The trek was slow, but they arrived at the back door of the cabin without mishap. Aidan released a deep breath as he opened the door with the key he’d found where Fox had said it would be. Inside the skull of a wolf sitting on the stoop.

  She really needed to have a long talk with Fox.

  Aidan opened the door, walked in and held the door for her. The smell hit her first, a mixture of stove oil, tanned fur, and age. The place smelled old and dusty. It looked old, dusty, and…wrecked.

  Aidan pulled the gun from his waistband and held it in front of him. He reached a hand behind him and grabbed her, pulling her up against his back. “Stay close.”

  He turned a full circle in the one room that made up the living space, kitchen, and small dining area. “Earl was never the cleanest sort, but this is beyond anything he would have lived with.”

  Cushions had been torn off the couch and ripped through with a knife. Drawers in the apartment-sized kitch
en were turned over, dumping their contents. Books had been thrown from the bookcases that lined the far log wall. Raven followed Aidan into the two bedrooms off to the left. They’d also been shredded. Mattresses pitched from the bed, their innards pulled out like wild animals had feasted on them.

  Aidan stumbled as he stepped on something with his bad leg. He went down on his knee.

  She reached out and helped him to his feet. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” He bent down, his fingers touching a dark spot. “I think this is blood.”

  She bent to take a look. A dried reddish-brown spot pooled on the pine floor. She kicked clothes and bedding out of her way and found what looked like a trail of sorts. Aidan motioned for her to be quiet as he once again pushed her behind him and followed the trail that lead to the bathroom. There they found more blood. On the floor, around the sink, and wiped on towels.

  “I’m willing to bet someone else got caught in one of Earl’s booby traps,” Aidan said.

  Raven looked at him. “Why would anyone be here?”

  “By the looks of the place, someone was looking for something. Did Fox say anything about the condition of the cabin?”

  “No, but why would he?” Her brows furrowed.

  “The night I was injured, he came into the cabin and grabbed blankets. He didn’t say anything then, but things were hectic. He might not have noticed.”

  “How could he have missed this?”

  “Whoever went through my SUV went through the cabin too. But why now?”

  “You mean, why not go through the place before you showed up?”

  “Yeah. Earl’s been dead since the middle of July. The cabin’s been empty all this time.”

  “You’re forgetting that nobody knew Earl was dead until you showed up.” Her gaze flew to his as the reality of what she’d just said sank in.

  “You think someone in town did this?”

  “I don’t want to, but it makes sense.”

  He nodded, his expression solemn. “It does.” He walked to the window where the blood trail ended. “Whoever was in here was scared off.” He indicated the blood trail and the window left open. “By the looks of this place, I’d say they didn’t find what they were looking for.”