Ashlinn, Mia - Bound by Love's Gravity [The Doms of Kinky, Kansas 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting)
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Sauntering around to the opposite side, Kylia leaned her hip against the other arm. “I’m here. Okay?”
Not answering her, Ansley said, “Hmmm. Where to begin?” She furrowed her eyebrow as her lips turned down. Then finally, a Eureka! expression crossed her face. “I got it! We’ll start at the beginning.”
Despite her nervousness, Sarah had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing. Ansley was a nut. She loved that about her. The other woman’s innate craziness had helped her through many of her roughest days.
“Do go on,” Kylia suggested. “We’re not getting any younger here.”
Ansley rolled her eyes. “After you decided to move to Kinky, I started thinking.” She gave a self-deprecating laugh. “You should be proud. That doesn’t happen much.”
“Ansley,” Kylia said. Sarah heard the warning in her tone. Hopefully, Ansley did, too.
“Yeah, yeah, KK. I got off track—as usual.” She huffed. “Anyway, I realized that we’ve all been going about this the wrong way.”
Sarah closed her eyes. This was going to be bad, very, very bad. She could feel it in her bones. “What way?”
A smile spread across Ansley’s face. “You love Deke and Adam. Right?”
Sarah nodded.
“Deke and Adam love you. Right?”
Confused as to where this was going, Sarah replied. “I think so. Maybe? I don’t know for sure.”
To Sarah’s shock, Kylia gave an out-of-character snort. “Don’t be silly. The Bosses love you.”
Clearing her throat noticeably, Ansley asked, “Deke and Adam love each other. Right?”
Sarah still had no clue where this line of questioning was going, but she had to find out. She has a point…somewhere. I just have to keep playing along. She nodded. “Yes.”
“Divide and conquer,” Ansley announced with a self-satisfied smile as though those three words should explain it all.
It didn’t. “Huh?” Sarah asked, dumbfounded.
Kylia shifted then stood. “It’s her screwy way of saying that she is breaking you all apart then putting you back together—Humpty Dumpty style.”
“But this time it’ll work,” Ansley insisted. “The Edge has plenty of bondage tape lying around.” She winked. “Trust me. I know.”
Sarah fought the urge to elbow Ansley. She won, too. “I’m still confused. Can someone explain this to me in a way that I’ll understand?”
“I’ll let you do that, KK. She hasn’t learned my special language yet.”
Sarah didn’t believe she would ever understand Ansley’s special language. She was all over the place, all the time, when she talked. Silly flibbertigibbet.
In evident exasperation, Kylia shook her head. “Deke gave you up. Adam gave Deke up. You gave them both up. Now, you’re all separated. Love will pull you back together.”
“Wait. What?” Sarah asked. She was starting to feel like an idiot. “The three of us being apart isn’t going to fix a thing. It’s a freaking disaster.”
And that was an understatement. Since Adam had told her about his fight with Deke, Sarah had been driving herself crazy with worry for herself and for both of them. She’d barely eaten. And sleep had been out of the question. That was why she’d been so thrilled when Ansley had called and said that Deke and Adam had made up and wanted her to join them for drinks then dinner. She’d thought there was a chance for them after all, even if it was only a small one. But no, it had all been a stupid prank that would likely land her in hot water.
“It’s not a disaster,” Kylia disagreed.
Ansley, however, said nothing. She wasn’t paying them any attention as she crossed her long legs seductively then shot a sex-laced look toward a man across the room, a drop-dead gorgeous man who looked an awful lot like Adam. Declan. She turned her gaze toward the man next to him, sticking her tongue out childishly. The second stranger scowled back at her. He appeared to have a huge stick up his bottom, but he also bore a resemblance to Ansley. Lucian.
“Lucian is visiting,” Ansley explained. Not that she needed to share that tidbit. Kylia’s furious glare had said it all.
“I’m going to ignore that,” Kylia snapped haughtily. “We need to discuss more important things anyway.”
Ansley shrugged. “Whatever, babe. You should have them put a ring on it, like that Beyoncé song you hate so much.” With a wink, she hummed the melody beautifully. “Or in your case, lock a collar on it.”
Sarah choked when she saw Kylia’s plum-colored, fury-filled face. Oh boy. Smelling trouble, she scrambled to change the subject before a cat fight broke out. “Um. You never explained the whole divide and conquer stuff.”
“Stuff?” Ansley scoffed. “It’s a brilliant plan. The three of you have some weird cosmic thing going on. It’s like you can’t keep away from each other.”
Sarah laughed. That was an insane conclusion for her friend to have drawn. Before a couple of years ago, she hadn’t known Adam and Deke had avoided her like she had some vicious disease.
Ansley pursed her pretty lips. “Think about it. As a child, you were with Deke. From what I hear, you two were close—well, as close as Deke lets people. We’ve all heard the stories about his doting on a tiny scrap of a girl with perpetually bruised knees and big gray eyes. Then he went off to college where he met Adam. They fell in love and all that gooey crap. Years later, you meet Adam. After that famously embarrassing meeting, you two were as thick as thieves while Deke and Adam were partners. It’s simple math really.”
Sarah’s face heated. No one was ever going to let her live down the story of how she’d met Adam. They’d been at the rehearsal dinner for mutual friends when he’d approached the group she’d been standing in. He’d started to introduce himself, but she’d blurted out that he was beautiful—before he could even utter his name. Instantly, she’d paled and begun to hyperventilate. While she’d been dying from mortification, Adam had been his charming, suave self. He’d reassured her and been kind about her faux pas, which had ended up irritating her. And the next thing she’d known she was fussing at him for being so nice and telling him it would be easier if he were a jerk. Then things had gone from bad to worse. He’d finally introduced himself as Adam, and she’d realized he was Deke’s Adam. Once she’d grasped that the man who’d turned her world upside down belonged to the man she’d spent her life loving from afar, she’d run away. And she hadn’t stopped until Adam had cornered her several weeks later.
“Oh, really?” Kylia inquired with a grin that made her look sinister. “If I remember correctly, you failed all your high school math classes. Isn’t that right?” Her eyes twinkled. “And who tutored you in college? I think that was me.”
Ansley sniffed. “You know what I mean.”
Surprisingly, Sarah did. She’d not really thought about it before now. But the truth of it was the three of them had always been linked in some way—Deke and Sarah had a connection until Adam came along. Then Adam had connected with Deke, leaving Sarah behind. Finally, Adam had connected with her. They’d just not all connected at the same time. Simple math.
Sarah giggled. “I’m starting to think like you, Ansley.”
“Smart girl.”
Kylia shuddered. “Don’t go over to the dark side. Their cookies are poisoned.”
With that, Ansley and Kylia’s bantering truly started, and Sarah sat back for the show. Then something hit her. “Wait! What does math have to do with me being in here without permission?”
Ansley grinned. “I have it on the highest authority that Adam and Deke are making up as we speak.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “Bada bing, bada boom.”
“The highest authority?” Kylia scoffed. “Deke told you. Adam told me. Then we told each other. That’s not the highest authority.”
Ansley stuck her tongue out at Kylia. “Yes, it is. Deke and Adam are the highest authorities.”
“Whatever,” Kylia retorted. “It doesn’t matter. They’re working things out. That’s all that counts.”
Suddenly, Sarah felt like doing the Snoopy dance. But she refrained—barely. Instead, she prompted Ansley to go on with her strange explanation about math, sneaking into the club, and the two men making up. “And…”
Kylia answered Sarah for Ansley. “We want to make sure that you aren’t left out of the equation this time.”
Sarah’s heart fell, as did her eyes. “I don’t want to be an unwelcome addition.”
“Ha.” Ansley ruffled Sarah hair like a kid sister. “They won’t leave you out this time. But you know how men are. They are slow on the uptake when it comes to the women in their lives. Me, Kylia, and some of the Doms are just helping them along a little, especially Deke. He’s going to go ape-shit crazy when we’re done with today’s little adventure. It’s going to be fabulous.”
If Sarah had a dirty mouth, she would have cursed. “You, Kylia, and some of the Doms? You want to get me into trouble?”
Ansley appeared positively giddy as she rubbed her hands together. “Got it in one. Did you think we did this on our own? We’re good but not that good. And not that stupid either.” She glanced pointedly at the corner where the mouthwatering trainer stood. “Sebastian was kind enough to take responsibility for you tonight.”
Pointing at various people around the room, Ansley gave an entire rundown of her fellow conspirators. By the time she finished, Sarah’s head hurt. They had to have included twenty people to pull of this scheme of theirs. When all was said and done, she’d never remember who to thank or shun, depending on the outcome of tonight.
Outcome? I’m acting like I decided to stay and play. Sarah couldn’t help it. She laughed at her unintentional double entendre, drawing strange stares from both blondes. “What?” she asked, batting her eyelashes innocently. “I was just thinking.”
“About?” Kylia asked curiously, her inner psychologist peeking out.
Ansley elbowed Sarah. “God, let it be dirty.”
Sarah rolled her eyes. “Whether or not to stay and play.”
Ansley chuckled. “If you stay, you’ll play all right—when Adam and Deke get here.”
“How long do you think it’ll be?” Sarah hated to ask, but she was dying to know. If she decided to stay, she needed to prepare herself—mind, body, and soul—for whatever came her way.
Deke wasn’t likely to go down without a fight. After all, he hadn’t spoken to her since the two men had fought, just like Adam hadn’t come to visit her, not even once. Other than a couple of impersonal phone calls from Adam, she’d had no contact with the men. Although, from what she’d heard from Ansley, Deke and Adam hadn’t even had that. She’d told Sarah that Adam was staying with Declan while Deke remained at the club.
Of course, Sarah didn’t know anything for sure. Right now, Ansley and Kylia were the only ones talking about anything of substance. More like gossiping. So Sarah was being forced to rely on them for information about Deke and Adam.
Sarah sighed. She just wished that Adam would really talk to her. Every time he called, he refused to say a word about how he was feeling or what was going on with him. He just asked if she was okay and if she needed anything. When she lied and said she was fine, he hung up with nothing more than a pithy good-bye. And while they were on the phone, he never spoke of Deke. In fact, the only time he’d even uttered his partner’s name was when he’d told her of their argument. Even then, he’d only given her a few details. He’d said that they’d fought and they needed some space from each other and her. She’d asked questions, but he shut every one of them down. After that, he’d pushed her away and acted as though Deke didn’t exist.
Sarah started hyperventilating as she remembered the distance between them. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. But what if it is?
Time, Sarah needed more time. She had to find a way to calm her racing heart and wipe her sweaty palms. And she needed to find a changing room. If she was going to stay, she hardly looked appealing in her favorite gray dress. Oh sugar snap peas. She should just give it up and go home. Maybe tomorrow? No. Not tomorrow. Today, gosh darn it.
“If we’re lucky, a while.” Ansley leaned back, arching her back sensuously. Sarah couldn’t help but notice the way her friend stared into the security camera and licked her lips lustily. “I want to see how much trouble I can get us into.”
Kylia chuckled. “You just want your ass whipped by Hale and Wyatt. That’s why you’re flirting with the camera.”
“Shut up,” Ansley growled. “You want to fuck my brother and Declan. Good luck with that.”
Sarah didn’t say it, but she had a feeling they were going to need a lot more than luck. Six Doms plus three unruly subs equaled big trouble. And for the first time, Sarah wanted to find out exactly what big trouble was. So she stayed seated and waited for it to come and get her.
Chapter 9
Deke shivered. But he wasn’t cold. The third floor of The Edge was a comfortable sixty-nine degrees. No, he was nervous. In a mere minute, he was going to knock on Adam’s office door, go inside, and fight for his life because the alternative was unfathomable. He wouldn’t lose Adam. Not now, not ever. He couldn’t seem to breathe without him.
For the past three days, Deke had done some serious soul-searching, and he found that he didn’t like what he saw. Adam had been right. Deke was a coward and a selfish bastard. That was a certainty. And Adam was strong and giving. That was unquestionable. But when Deke thought about not loving Adam, not sharing their lives together, he’d been gutted. How could he survive without a deeply ingrained part of his soul?
Then there was Sarah. She scared the shit out of him. But he cared for her. He cared way too much. And no matter what he did or how hard he fought, the truth was he couldn’t walk away from her. Not now, and he feared not ever. Believing any differently was delusional.
Accepting his need for both Adam and Sarah had been excruciating. Not because of them, but because of him. He’d screwed everything up—time and again. Now he had to fight to win back the things he’d callously thrown away. The irony was incredible.
Deke sighed then raised his trembling hand and tapped on the door. A curse later, the door swung open and revealed a haphazard Adam.
Deke’s eyebrows shot up. What the hell? Adam looked as though he’d been dancing in the eye of a Kansas tornado. His hair was mussed in a way that shouldn’t have been sexy but somehow was. He’d stripped down to black slacks that were at one point pressed and a crisp white button-down shirt he’d left half tucked in, half hanging out. His feet were bare, and he had a frown firmly in place.
Adam didn’t speak. Neither did Deke. They stood in awkward silence, his partner inside the office and him on the outside looking in. Finally, Deke asked anxiously, “Can I come in?”
Adam stared at Deke, and his heart skipped a beat. He wasn’t going to let Deke in. Deke knew it. His lifeline was slipping away. Desperate, Deke murmured, “Please.”
Adam nodded then moved aside and granted him entrance. Deke ambled into the room. Unsure of what to do or where to sit, he stood in the middle of the space, silently waiting—for what, he didn’t know. Seconds passed, and Deke counted each one in his head. Then minutes drifted by, and he mentally ticked those off, too. It was that or listening to the obnoxious roaring in his ears or counting the rapid thrum of his beating heart.
Finally, Adam closed the door to his office and took a seat on his modern lounge chair. “Why don’t you sit down?” He pointed toward the identical black chair opposite him. “We need to talk.”
Deke nodded then skirted around the edge of the chair before lowering himself into it hesitantly. He reclined against the thick cushions, resting his hands on the arms of the chair. “Yes, we do.”
God, Deke hated this. He despised being unsure of himse
lf. It was like his childhood all over again, and he’d once promised himself he’d never feel that way again. Yet here he was, feeling self-conscious and insecure. And he couldn’t stop it.
“Okay.” Adam met his gaze levelly, only his eyes were off. The blue was deeper, more intense, and tinged with trepidation. “Talk.”
Deke forced back his grimace. “I was wrong.”
Evidently taken off guard by Deke’s proclamation, Adam’s eyes flared, but he said nothing.
“You were right.”
Adam’s lips twitched as though he were fighting a smile. Still though, he didn’t speak.
“I was a coward—with you and Sarah.”
Adam nodded.
“You know why.”
“Yes, Deke, I know why. I guess I should say, the whos—your parents, Chloe, and Megan.”
Deke couldn’t combat his grimace this time. Hearing the names of the four people who’d nearly broken him, one at a time, slammed into his chest. For a second, breathing hurt. He took a couple of long, laborious breaths then forged on. “I let my past rule me. Even with you, I couldn’t give myself to you completely. Handing you my heart and soul gave you the power to destroy me. I couldn’t handle that.”
Adam frowned. “I understand that, Deke. But I’m not them. I would never hurt you like that.”
No, Adam was nothing like Deke’s birth parents, the two individuals who’d fucked him up royally in only five years. He wasn’t cruel like his father had been. In the time they’d been together, no day had gone by that Adam had tortured him or threatened him. And Adam wasn’t hardhearted or irresponsible like his mother had been. He’d never thrown Deke out because he was baggage he’d never wanted to be saddled with.
God knew Adam had nothing in common with Chloe or Megan. He hadn’t cheated on Deke then dumped him callously like Chloe had. He was too honorable to treat him that way. By the time she’d been through with him, he’d felt no better than yesterday’s trash. Adam was the polar opposite. He made Deke feel special. He made him feel loved. And other than with Sarah, that wasn’t something Deke had ever felt.