Through The Shattered Glass
Page 26
We were the Leamington Crew who used to travel to all the shows together during our stint in Joint Promotions. I was never able to attend Chris’ funeral in Texas, and never had the chance to say goodbye to him.
Linda Hanley, friend of Jeanie Clarke: “I met Jeanie about thirty years ago at the Royal Albert Hall. I was talking to Mark Rocco and Jeanie joined in, and from then on we became best friends. I often stayed with her and Chris Adams, even in America, and it was great to be with Jeanie at the reunion where Chris was honoured.”
Towards the end of his life, Chris Adams ended up in a desperate situation and I am more than aware of the tragedy he caused to countless others. The pain he brought to those around him is something that cannot be denied.
But I choose to remember the kind-hearted soul, who had a world of potential and brought so much love to an insecure young girl from Southend-on-Sea. I will always miss him, and he was such a supportive ear when I was going through my problems with Steve.
On the subject of Steve, I endeavoured to write the truth about our relationship when I embarked upon this project. When I first met him, he was such a humble, quiet guy, but his journey to superstardom was astronomical, and he changed as a result.
From the early days of our marriage to the end of it, Steve’s commitment as a husband and father became as disparate as the ‘Stone Cold’ character was from ‘Stunning’ Steve.
However, Steve was only one half of the marriage, and I know our relationship unravelled once we realised how incompatible we were as people. I tried to find escapism from my home misery with substance abuse, while Steve pursued fame at all costs, including the dissolution of his family.
Unfortunately, Steve Austin has now become to his children what he is to everyone else; just some guy you only see on television. It saddens me when the girls try to reach out to him, and he fails to follow up on their expectations to return their calls. I could not tell you the last time he called them on their birthdays or at Christmas to wish them well, and his estrangement has left a scar that will never heal.
Steve has since told them that he will not support them unless they pursue a career that meets his approval. It’s pretty hypocritical hearing that from a college drop-out and football failure whose parents allowed him to pursue a dream in pro wrestling.
Despite huge wealth, Steve has only spoken to his daughters on a handful of occasions since our divorce. As a father, he seemed to throw in the towel once he failed to beat me for sole custody. After realising he couldn’t win it outright, he has not been willing to compromise.
Steve and I both know the pain caused by having to grow up without our dads in our lives. It is pretty cruel he chose to inflict the same hurt on our daughters, Stephanie and Cassidy. But it is his loss. He is the one who is missing out on the blessing of being around our wonderful children.
Throughout many of my darkest days, it was the undying love of the girls that gave me a reason to want to stay alive, and it was their intervention that led to me becoming clean. But even when I was struggling to cope with my drug addictions, they know that I never threw in the towel as a mother. I could never abandon them, despite the ongoing turmoil in my life.
Stephanie Williams, daughter of Jeanie Clarke: “Growing up in the shadows of my father’s career and my mother’s addiction was extremely challenging as a kid.
My father was out of reach, and the only interaction I had with him was every Monday night on RAW, whilst the relationship with my mother was interrupted by her addiction, and forced me to grow up. The events my sister and I endured aren’t things I’d like to share, however I would like to express that I couldn’t be more proud of the person, and the mother, that she is today.
I just want to say to her that I have been waiting for this woman to rise above her demons and now that you aren’t lost I finally get to see the smile and hear your laughter that makes you such a joy to be around. Honestly I hope that if this book hasn’t touched others it at least touches you. You have come such a long way and please know your strengths haven’t gone unnoticed. Here’s to a new chapter of your life.
I love you.”
We have now put our past behind us, and we are looking forward to our future. The challenges we faced have strengthened our bond as a family. But my only regret is that the girls are still missing a major part of their family; their father.
Stephanie and Cassidy became the true victims in my split from Steve, which has since affected their relationship with their older sister, Jade.
Jade has not spoken to the girls for years since she cut me out of her life. Being able to tell my side of the story in this book has allowed me to bring a sense of closure to my relationship with her, giving me an outlet for the words that I never had the chance to say face-to-face.
If she ever wants to talk, I want her to know I am open to reconciliation, but I have come to accept that our relationship may never be repaired.
I am just relieved to know that Jade is safe and happily married. I hope the love of her children gives her the same joy that she brought to my life when she was a child. I am glad she has created a loving home for her family.
A stable environment was something that I never had in my early years. Due to an unsettled childhood and tumultuous life, I was never truly able to create the sense of home I always wanted.
As I write this, I am in the process of looking for a new house, and the thought of a new beginning is giving me a tremendous thrill. However, I have learned that a home is not necessarily something you create, or buy. It’s something you feel. And I believe I have found it.
In a lifetime of searching, I am finally home.
It was this sense of fulfilment that made me want to share my story.
I am a person who lived the highest of highs and struggled with the lowest of lows. I will never forget sinking to the point that I held Steve’s gun in my hand, aimed it at my head, and was ready to pull the trigger. I did my utmost to destroy my body, by poisoning it each day.
But even though I lost all faith in myself, I never lost my belief in Christ.
And it seemed that God never lost his belief in me.
When I look back on my life, I now believe that there was an intervention beyond my control; a greater plan which prevented my untimely death.
Bobby Fulton, former WCCW wrestler: “These days I’m a committed Christian and I speak and share the gospel. I’m also a pastor at my church and am very heavily involved in all aspects of my church in Ohio.
Hearing about the problems in her life that she has overcome I’d like to give a prayer to Jeanie.
There have been so many in our business that lost their lives to addictions. But through Jesus Christ those of us who are still here can find strength through his name, and do anything in the name of Christ. If we acknowledge Christ in all that we do then we will direct our path. I am thankful that Jeanie has seen the light and has accepted Christ, and I pray that she continues to fight the good fight, keeps the faith and holds onto that through until eternal life.
Amen.”
There was a journey set out for me. It was not an easy one to live, but my story provides testament that a person can survive beyond breaking point, and find the resilience to turn their life around. Even at the last minute, when all hope seems lost.
Marc Mero, former WCW wrestler-turned-motivational speaker: “I made some horrible choices in my life as a pro wrestler. 1 Corinthians 15:33 Bad company corrupts good character. What God was saying many years ago is we become who we surround ourselves with. I choose my company; I choose to live a life opposite of what Christ would want.
So when I got to a place in my life because of sin, I remember saying “How did I get here?”
It’s called consequences. I lost so much in such a short period of time; the death of friends and family. Through my faith in Jesus my life has been forever changed. He has a plan and purpose for all our lives. I now travel the world speaking at schools, churches and corporations.
Through this book, I have realised my life purpose; to share my experiences with others, and spread the conviction that there is always a way out from certain tragedy.
Life is full of challenges. It is our ability to take on these challenges that defines our lives.
And that’s the bottom line.
Jeanie Clarke, 2016.
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Jeanie Clarke is a former entrepreneur, model, and professional wrestling valet from Southend-on-Sea, England. She is most famous for her appearances with Joint Promotions on ITV’s World of Sport, the United States Wrestling Association, and World Championship Wrestling, where she performed under the name Lady Blossom. In 1991, Clarke decided to retire from wrestling to concentrate on her family life, and married Steve Austin two years later. She famously came up with his ‘Stone Cold’ persona, developing an edgy character which drove the professional wrestling industry to unforeseen heights. Jeanie remained close to the industry during the boom period of the ‘Attitude Era’ of the World Wrestling Federation, before returning to the United Kingdom in 2001. Despite achieving success in business and entertainment, her greatest accomplishments were to raise her children and to survive a seventeen-year addiction to drugs. Today, Jeanie focuses on making public appearances to share her incredible life story.
Bradley Craig is a Chartered Architect and professional wrestling historian, based in the United Kingdom. Born in Aberdeen, he founded The Professional Wrestling Hall of Fame for Scotland in 2015, and is active in the research and ongoing cultural preservation of the sport. He has contributed written articles to a number of international magazines on the subjects of architecture and professional wrestling, and is a member of various institutions which honour the rich history of both industries.
Neil Cameron was born and lives in Suffolk. After a career in the travel industry, he turned his hand to looking after the legacy of Elvis Presley for his many U.K. fans. When not behind his desk he enjoys travelling, reading, visiting as many restaurants as he can, listening to obscure music, watching bad movies and has never met a cup of tea, a slice of cake or a pint of good beer he didn’t like.
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Page
DEDICATION
Table of Contents
Acknowledgements
Foreword
Introduction
Prologue
1 Sandy Beginnings
2 Go Away Little Girl
3 Seconds Away, Round One!
4 When Saturday Comes
5 California Dreaming
6 The Grass Isn’t Always Greener In Portland
7 The Dallas Trip
8 A Stunning Discovery
9 Romance Blossoms
10 The Toll Of The Road
11 Family Comes First
12 In Holy Matrimony
13 Injured Pride
14 An Extreme Decision
15 A World Of Opportunity
16 Georgia On My Mind
17 The Lone Star State
18 Losing Identity
19 In Dark Despair
20 A Fractured Home
21 Escape From Reality
22 Gentlemanly Conduct
23 Breaking Point
24 In God We Trust
About the Authors