Thin Crust Killers

by Chris Cavender

  He frowned, then said, “I can afford it now, you know.”

  “Trust me, I fully realize that, but don’t you think something more personal would make a better donation? You could offer a lesson in something you like to do.”

  “Like what, eat? I guess I could teach someone how to study; I’m pretty good at that.”

  “Don’t sell yourself short. You’re a math whiz,” I said. “How about offering some tutoring sessions?”

  “Do you really think anyone would bid on that?”

  “Why not? I’m sure there are kids in town who could use a little help, so why not try it?”

  He shook his head. “To be honest with you, that’s kind of lame. I need to come up with something really special. What are you going to do?”

  “Maddy and I decided to give away a romantic dinner for two,” I admitted.

  “That’s just great,” he said abruptly.

  “What’s wrong with that?”

  “Not a thing. It’s a wonderful idea. It just killed the only other thought I had.”

  Josh came back with an order.

  As he handed it to me, he asked Greg, “Are you working or talking?”

  “Can’t I do both?” Greg asked.

  “Sure. You’ve got the talking part down cold. Now, let’s see some of the work part.” He chucked Greg’s apron at him as he said it, and Greg plucked it neatly out of the air.

  “What are you donating for the auction?”

  “I made the posters and flyers,” Josh said proudly.

  “That’s not enough. Tell you what. Why don’t we come up with something to auction off together?”

  “I like all of my stuff,” Josh said. “I don’t want to get rid of any of it.”

  “Nobody wants your discards,” Greg said. “I’m talking about giving an experience away. Is there anything we can do together?”

  “Guys,” I said. “Neither one of you has to do anything for the auction. This was our idea. Just because you work here doesn’t mean either one of you is obligated to donate something.”

  “It doesn’t mean we can’t, either,” Josh said. “Maybe we could take somebody skydiving.”

  “Do you know how to skydive?” Greg asked him.

  “No, but I’ve always wanted to learn. What better time than when I’m already jumping out of a plane?”

  Greg thought about it a few seconds, then he said, “I like it, but we need to come up with something bigger than that.”

  “Bigger than skydiving?” I asked. “Let’s be reasonable, guys.”

  “There will be plenty of time for that when we’re older,” Josh said. “Now’s the time to get our youthful indiscretions out of the way.”

  “I don’t want any parents thinking I’m pushing you two into this,” I said. I could just hear Kevin Hurley now.

  “Don’t worry, we’ll sign waivers,” Greg said happily.

  Josh agreed, then added, “Maybe we could do hot air balloons.”

  “It’s not as cool as jumping out of a plane,” Greg said, “but it’s something to consider.”

  “I’m not talking about taking a ride in one,” Josh explained. “I think we should jump out of one of those with parachutes on.”

  “Now you’re talking.”

  The two of them were still scheming as they went out into the dining room to wait on customers. I was beginning to wonder what monsters I’d created with my off-the-cuff idea. I’d have to keep an eye on those two, or they might be able to get themselves—and an unsuspecting bidder—into some serious trouble.

  There was finally a lull in the dinner crowd, one I’d been waiting for. I made a large veggie pizza just like Doc Parsons normally ordered from us, slid it on the conveyor, and then called Maddy to come back into the kitchen.

  “I need you to watch things back here while I’m gone,” I said.

  “Where are you going? Are you coming back? What happened?” The panic in her voice was very real.

  “Take it easy,” I said. “Sis, you can handle the kitchen as well as I can.”

  “We both know that’s a big fat lie.”

  I grinned. “Okay, almost as well, then. I shouldn’t be gone more than half an hour, and you’ve got Greg and Josh to work the front.”

  “You still haven’t said where you’re going.”

  “We haven’t talked to Doc Parsons yet. I’m making him a pizza, and I’ll deliver it and ask a few questions while I’m there.”

  “I could take care of that for you,” Maddy said. Why was she suddenly worried about running the kitchen? The idea had never bothered her before.

  “As the owner, I need to do it if my cover story’s going to work. I’m reaching out to the community, remember? I doubt we could get a free check-up from him for the auction, so this is the next best way to get in.”

  “I guess.”

  “Maddy, what’s wrong? You haven’t lost your nerve, have you?”

  “Sis, I’m fine when things are slow, but it’s easy to get overwhelmed back here when the orders are flying in faster than I can make them. It’s not like I can speed the conveyor up, is it? Or can you?”

  She leaned down to study the workings of the conveyor oven when I pulled her up. “Maddy, the conveyor’s your best friend when you’re busy.”

  “I don’t see how.”

  “That’s because you’re not looking at it the right way. Once the food hits that conveyor, you’re done with it until it comes out the other side. The trick is to get each item done and in line. Don’t think of it as a mass of orders. Focus on each thing you’re doing, and the rest will take care of itself. It’s really important to have tunnel vision sometimes, but you’ll get the knack of it. Remember, you can’t burn anything, or undercook it. The oven takes the worry out of that part of it. Does that help?”

  “I guess so,” she said, clearly not at all convinced.

  I’d done all I could. Maddy would have to find her own way, or she’d never be able to sub for me in complete shifts, and that meant I was tied to the Slice for the rest of my natural-born life.

  I had faith in her. She’d learn to run the kitchen at full capacity.

  She had to.

  I slid the finished pizza into a box and walked out front.

  Greg dropped the tub of dirty dishes on a table he’d been bussing and reached for it. “Where’s it going?”

  “You’re off the hook for this one. I’m delivering it myself,” I said.

  “What’s the matter, Eleanor? Losing faith in me?”

  What was it all of a sudden with my staff? Usually they were a delight, but today they were all getting under my skin. “You know that’s too ridiculous to even comment on. I’m taking this by Doc Parsons for a little PR. The way I see it, you’ve got two choices. You can keep helping Josh out here in front, or you can take Maddy’s place in the kitchen.”

  “Thanks, I’ll stay right where I am,” Greg said.

  Maddy was listening in, and said, “Coward.”

  Greg grinned at her. “You’ve got that right. I’m going to see if I can talk one of my customers into ordering lasagna.”

  “But that’s not on the menu,” Maddy protested.

  “No, but it would be fun watching you try to make it.”

  That was all I wanted to hear about that. “No special orders, that’s our rule around here. Greg, finish that table. Maddy, the kitchen’s all yours.”

  Josh looked at me and smiled. “What do you want me to do?”

  “Besides your job, I’d appreciate it if you’d keep the two of them from killing each other.”

  “Come on, Eleanor, give me something easy, like coming up with a plan for world peace or something.”

  “I figure if you can handle them, the rest will be a piece of cake.”

  “I’m sorry, there must be some mistake. We didn’t order a pizza,” Angie Parsons said as I walked into her husband’s office.

  “Where’s Sally?” Sally Derkins had been the doctor’s nurse and recepti
onist since he’d opened his practice in town three years before. She’d worked for our last doctor into her sixties, and when he retired, we had all expected her to stop working, too. Sally had other plans, though.

  At least I thought she had. “She didn’t retire, did she?”

  “No, I’m afraid we had to let her go.”

  Angie didn’t look all that upset about it, and as much as I wanted to ask her what had happened, I couldn’t bring myself to cross her. She was at least eight months pregnant judging from her belly, and it was pretty clear she wasn’t all that happy about the situation.

  “I’d appreciate it if you’d take that”—she pointed at the pizza box as she said it, the scowl clear on her face—“with you when you leave.”

  It appeared that Doc Parsons had himself a pretty effective gatekeeper, and I wasn’t sure how I was going to get past her.

  I was about to comply with her request, because frankly, she frightened me more than a little, when Doc Parsons came out of his office. “What is that heavenly aroma? Eleanor, you are an angel of mercy. We were so busy with patients today we had to skip lunch.”

  Angie said severely, “You did, Brad. I can’t afford to.”

  If he noticed his wife’s cross demeanor, he didn’t mention it. “That’s because you’re eating for two. Care for a slice of this? I might be able to spare one or two.”

  “No, you know how I feel about pizza.” She turned to look at me, then added, “No offense.”

  “None taken,” I said, forcing a smile. “Everybody doesn’t have to like it, but most folks do.”

  The doctor took the pizza from me, then he asked, “What do I owe you for this?”

  “It’s on the house. Think of it as a thank-you for all that you do for the community.”

  He nodded his thanks. “Since Angie’s not having any, would you like a slice? I’d be honored to have you join me.”

  I was wondering if he was ever going to ask. “That sounds great.”

  “Angie?” he asked hopefully. “It’s not too late to change your mind.”

  She shook her head, clearly showing how she felt about my livelihood. “You two go on. I have a ton of paperwork to do.”

  We left her out front and went into the doctor’s office. He’d asked me to call him Brad, but I’d had a hard time doing it, even though he was younger than I was. It was a habit I’d find very hard to break, but if I was going to gain his confidence enough to grill him, I was going to have to start trying.

  I’d brought paper plates and three cans of soda with me, and while I served, Brad made room on his desk.

  He took the first bite, then smiled broadly. “Man, that tastes like a little bit of heaven. I’ve really missed this.”

  “You can have one anytime you want, you know. All you have to do is call or come by.”

  “I wish I could, but the smell of pizza makes Angie sick. It has ever since she first got pregnant.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said quickly. “I never even thought about that.”

  “Don’t worry about it, Eleanor. The smell of most things makes her sick. She’s having a tough pregnancy, and it’s starting to wear on everyone’s nerves. You noticed Sally was gone, didn’t you?”

  “Angie said you fired her.”

  “That’s a little harsh,” he said. “We both decided that Sally might enjoy some time off. I figure as soon as Angie has the baby, things can get back to normal around here.” He lowered his voice as he added, “I’m paying her while she’s off, but don’t tell my wife. She’d have an absolute fit if she knew that.”

  I nodded in agreement. If Brad had strayed on his wife with Missy—and I wasn’t saying that he had, just that it was possible—he was a braver soul than I was. It was the wrong thing to do, but clearly also a dangerous act. At the moment, I’d rather have a machete-wielding madman come after me than his wife.

  Brad polished off the piece I’d served him, then he dug back into the box and got two more. “This is an absolute treat,” he said after savoring another bite. “It’s about the only thing even close to being wicked that I indulge in anymore.”

  I wondered if that included the scant facts I’d seen in his file, but I couldn’t figure out how to broach the subject of his possible adultery. Maddy would have probably found a way, but I’d been forced to leave her behind. I just hoped she wasn’t struggling without me as much as I was without her.

  “Does that mean you don’t get out much?” I asked.

  “Angie and I are together around the clock since Sally’s been gone,” he said. “If I take a step, she’s right there. Sometimes I don’t even hear her come in.”

  I was about to ask him if that was true all of the time when his door opened and Angie came in. She waved a hand in front of her nose. “Please, I can smell that all the way at my desk. Aren’t you finished yet?”

  Brad took another big bite, then put his plate in the box and closed it tightly. He’d managed to eat over half of it, and I suddenly realized why he’d been so intent on wolfing it down. Chances were he knew his time with my pizza would be limited.

  He reached for his wallet as he asked, “Are you sure I can’t pay you for it? It was outstanding.”

  “You heard the woman,” Angie said as she shoved the box into my hands. “It’s on the house. Now if you’ll excuse us, Eleanor, we have work to do.” She pushed a stack of forms toward her husband. “You need to sign these before we leave tonight.”

  I decided it was time that I made a hasty exit. I hadn’t exactly gotten what I’d come for, but at least I had a little more insight into Doc Parsons’ life, and what he might be driven into doing.

  “I’m back,” I said as I walked into the Slice five minutes later. I hadn’t tarried a bit, expecting chaos and pandemonium when I returned. Instead, I found half a dozen tables filled with what appeared to be satisfied diners.

  “How did things go while I was gone?”

  Greg looked at me with a straight face. “You were gone? Really? We didn’t even notice.”

  Josh elbowed him aside. “Don’t listen to him, Eleanor. We always miss you when you’re gone. But there was nothing to worry about here. Maddy handled things just fine.”

  To my surprise, I was a little disappointed with the news. It appeared that they hadn’t even missed me. Surely Maddy would give me a warmer reception in the kitchen.

  I found her cleaning the prep area of the kitchen, and there was an unexpected smile on her face. “I’ve got to hand it to you, Eleanor. You were right.”

  “About what?” I asked as I reached for my apron.

  “Tunnel vision. That’s the key to the whole thing.” She put a hand on mine before I could put my apron on. “Can I ask you for a favor?”

  “Anything, Maddy. You know all you have to do is ask.”

  “Let me finish running the kitchen tonight. You can work out front, so you’ll be close by if I need you.”

  “Are you sure? It’s a lot of work.”

  She nodded. “I can handle it. You believe in me, don’t you?”

  “All the way to my core,” I said as I swapped my dirty apron for a pristine server’s apron. “If you need me, don’t be afraid to ask for help. There were enough times I had to ask Joe when I was starting out, and there’s no shame in it.”

  “I understand, but I think I’ll be fine.”

  I walked back out into the front of the pizzeria and found Greg and Josh watching me. “Okay fellows, it looks like I’m going to work the front tonight,” I said.

  “And you’re okay with that?” Josh asked.

  “Don’t be ridiculous. Of course I am. What were you two expecting, fireworks?”

  “Maybe a sparkler or two,” Greg admitted.

  “Sorry to disappoint you. Now why don’t you two take care of your customers while I get ready for our next rush?”

  They went back to their posts, and I straightened things up around the cash register, though it really didn’t need it. I felt a little lost not bei
ng in my kitchen for the rest of the night, but I wasn’t going to let any of my employees know that. Maddy was taking a big step, and I wasn’t about to stand in her way. If she learned to handle things during a rush, maybe I’d be able to get away sometime soon after all.

  By the time Greg had to leave for his first delivery of the evening, things were settling down into a nice routine. I found a rhythm working the front, and when I needed to, I stepped in and started waiting on tables with Josh. Every time I went into the kitchen with an order, Maddy was focused on the task at hand. I honestly didn’t think I could distract her with a bullhorn and a firecracker.

  I was just starting to breathe a sigh of relief when the front door opened.

  Oh well. It had been good while it had lasted.

  “I’m guessing you’re not here for pizza,” I told Kevin Hurley as he approached me at the counter. “Josh is waiting on tables if you need him.”

  “Thanks, but I’m here to talk to you,” he said.

  “What did I do now?”

  He jacked up an eyebrow as he looked at me. “What makes you say that? Have you done something lately you feel guilty about?”

  “That depends,” I said. “Are you asking as the police chief?”

  “I’m always asking as the chief,” he said.

  “Then no, I’m good,” I said. It was pretty clear that he was in a bad mood, and I had no reason to try to appease him.

  “Blast it all, now I can’t let it go. What have you been up to, Eleanor?”

  I meant to keep my mouth shut—honestly I did—but there was something about his tone that I just couldn’t take.

  “If you must know, Maddy and I have been working on Hank Webber’s murder.”

  He nodded, frowning as he did. “That’s what I’ve heard. I just wanted to see if you had the guts to admit it to my face.”

  “Somebody’s got to do something,” I said, not caring that my voice was carrying. I noticed a few customers turn toward us, but I wasn’t about to drop it. After all, he’d come to my place of business, and I could talk any way I wanted to there.

  “We’ve got local, state, and federal men working on the bank robbery. What more could you ask for?”