There

by Denise Grover Swank

  I cringe. She’s right.

  “All done feeling sorry for yourself?”

  I nod, then gasp from the pain.

  Her anger fades. “I need to figure out how much thread I have and what needs the most attention.”

  I start to protest, but her hand pushes my shoulder down.

  “Yes, I am stitching you up and yes, you will let me do it. Now I have to get the bag and some water and ethanol, then I’ll be back.”

  Once she leaves the tent, I hear Evan’s voice, but it’s too quiet to make out more than a murmur. Jo answers back with more patience than I expect. In a few minutes, she returns with our flashlight.

  “Reece came back.”

  My body sinks into the blanket in relief.

  “I told you he would.”

  “What if he attacks Evan again?”

  Jo shrugs. “I suspect that was a long time coming. It might not be done, but they both know we need to get out of here.”

  “So what are we still doing here?”

  “You’ll be a bigger pain if you get an infection or bleed to death. They’re packing up while I take care of you.” She examines my neck and arm then pulls a bottle out of her bag. “This is going to sting like hell. If you need to scream, feel free, but I will clean all of your cuts.” She dabs the top of the bottle to a small piece of cloth, then presses it to my neck.

  The pain shoots up my body off the ground, but when she pushes me down I grunt out, “You’re a bossy witch, aren’t you?”

  A grin lifts one corner of her mouth. “You’re just now figuring that out?”

  The burning is almost more than I can bear, but I refuse to cry any more than I already have tonight.

  By the time she cleans my arm, my nerves are raw and I feel unhinged. “What are you going to stitch?”

  “Your arm is the worst, but there’s one or two places on your neck that need stitches too.”

  “Okay.”

  She starts first on my arm and by the time she’s given me six stitches, I’m not sure I’ll survive having it done to my neck. “Give me a minute before you start the next one.”

  A serious expression covers her face. “A few seconds. I’m not sure we have much time, Chipper.”

  “Okay.” I close my eyes so I don’t see the needle coming toward my throat. “How many people have you stitched?”

  “How do you know that you’re not my first?” I hear the teasing tone in her voice.

  “Because you do that much too expertly to suggest otherwise.”

  The needle pierces my skin and the pain is much worse than my arm. To keep from crying out, I bite the inside of my cheeks until I taste blood.

  “I used to stitch up my dad and my brother,” she says quietly.

  “They must have gotten cut a lot.” I push out through gritted teeth.

  “Scavenging is a dangerous profession.”

  I think about the dead men outside. It proved dangerous for them.

  “At least you still have your necklace,” she says.

  I’d completely forgotten about my necklace. And my birthday. How quickly things change.

  After several minutes and six more stitches, Jo announces that she’s done and helps me sit up. “I wouldn’t get into any knife fights for the next few days.” She grins.

  “Very funny.” My arm and neck throb even more when I move or talk.

  She hands me two pills and a bottle of water. “Take these.”

  I check out the white tablets in my hand. “What are they?”

  “I wish they were pain pills, but they’re only aspirin.”

  After swallowing them with a sip from the bottle, I start to roll up my blanket.

  “Julia, I can do that.”

  Her soft tone surprises me.

  “I know you can. But so can I.”

  My ankle aches, and my wounds throb, but I refuse to be waited on.

  “You should probably change your shirt.”

  Mine is soaked with blood and partially dried and stuck to my chest. “Yeah.”

  She exits and I hear more murmuring outside. The fact that they’re talking about me crawls under my skin.

  Jo pokes her head in the opening and tosses me a sweater. “Hurry up. We’re about to head out and we need to take down the tent.”

  So much for her sympathy lasting long.

  After stripping off my old shirt, I pour water on the clean part and try to wipe some of the blood off my chest and my arm. I toss it to the ground and pull the sweater over my head. The neckline skims across my wounds just enough to make me groan from the pain. I exit the tent and toss the cloth into the now-dying fire. It feels wasteful, but the sleeve is ripped to shreds, and I suspect the bloodstains will never come out.

  Jo and Reece are already taking the tent down, and Evan is at the back of the scavenger’s truck, carrying a load to the jeep.

  I squint in confusion. “I thought the jeep was almost out of ethanol.”

  Jo tilts her head to the truck. “Reece siphoned out all the ethanol, and we put their extra fuel in the jeep. It’s better if we don’t take their truck. In case they track us down later. We don’t want the truck tying us to them.”

  And their bodies.

  Evan moves to the front of the jeep. “You were right, Jo. I found a map in the truck.” He spreads out a folded paper on the jeep’s hood, a flashlight in one hand while the other traces paths on the paper. “I think it marks the location of the rebel compound.”

  “Scavengers tend to know what’s around them. If we’re this close to the rebels, you can bet the scavengers within several hundred miles are going to know it. Perhaps even sell to them.”

  Reece moves closer, and he and Evan study the map together. “I think you’re right. And if it is, we’re even closer than we thought. We can easily be there by noon tomorrow.”

  “We have to sleep sometime,” I say, exhausted.

  Evan watches me for a second. The blood has been washed off his face, but his lip and eye are bruised and swollen. “We can take turns sleeping while we drive.”

  Jo tosses the folded tent into the jeep while Evan puts out the fire. Reece passes me and I rest my hand on his arm. He stops but refuses to look at me.

  The familiar ache swells in my heart, and I fight the memories in my head. “Reece,” I whisper. “I’m sorry.”

  He refuses to look at me. “Julia. Don’t.”

  Taking a shaky breath, I keep my hand on his arm. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you. You have to know that.”

  His eyes blaze with anger. “Don’t.” Shoving my hand aside, he joins Jo to sort through the contents on the truck bed.

  I help load up the remaining items. The scavengers’ bodies aren’t in sight, and I’m afraid to ask where they are. But their blood still stains the ground, setting my nerves on edge.

  Evan gets behind the steering wheel and Reece climbs into the back seat before we discuss the seating arrangement. It’s easy to figure out where I’m sitting.

  Within a several minutes, the trauma of the evening catches up to me. I’m thankful for the darkness so I can hide my shaking hands as I relive my close call with death. I take slow, deep breaths to keep calm. That last thing I want is a panic attack. My eyelids grow heavy, but I find it difficult to find a comfortable position to sleep because of my throbbing arm and neck. We ride in silence most of the night, and I finally doze off in a dreamless sleep. When I awaken, the sky is turning pink behind us. Jo’s head rests on the back of her seat and Reece dozes with his head on the window.

  Evan notices me stir and gently takes my hand. Pain shoots through my arm with the movement.

  He glances toward me when I stir. “Good morning.” His voice is soft and hesitant.

  “Good morning.” It’s hard to stay mad at him, but Reece brought up some valid questions last night. A deeper wedge has been shoved between us and Evan knows it.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you last night.” His hand tightens around mine. “
I will never let that happen again. I swear.”

  “You can’t promise that, Evan. I wish to God you could, but you can’t.”

  “I can’t stand to have you mad at me.”

  “I’m not mad about last night, Evan.” I keep my voice low so I don’t wake up Jo and Reece. “I mean I was, but I was mostly upset over the attack and hurting Reece, but there’s a bigger issue. You go off for hours by yourself, and you won’t tell me what you’re doing. Don’t you trust me?”

  His mouth drops, and he swings his head to face me. “How can you ask me that?”

  “You have a huge secret. If you trusted me, you’d tell me what it was.”

  He turns back to the road. “No, Jules. It has nothing to do with trust and everything to do with keeping you safe. If I tell you, I put you at risk, and I refuse to do that anymore.”

  Yesterday morning I would have believed him, but Jo has sown the seeds of doubt and they’re in full bloom.

  He shifts in his seat, still holding my hand. “Do you blame me for losing your memories? I know how much it kills you to hurt Reece. Do you blame me for that?”

  “Evan, I told you last night that I’d do it all again. I love you.”

  “Even if you knew you’d hurt Reece?” He’s silent for a moment.

  When he asks it that way, it seems selfish.

  Shaking his head, he casts a glance toward me. “I blame myself, even if you don’t. I think taking you to the rebels might be a bad idea.”

  His confession shocks me. For over a week, our plan has been to find Reece’s mom and hope she can help me get home. “What’s the worst that could happen, Evan? The truth.”

  “We’re pretty sure Reece’s mom is there. We’re counting on that. Reece wants to find her, and I’m hoping she’ll want me because of the scientific knowledge I bring. I’ll get access to their labs, then I can figure out how to get you home.”

  “How are we going to explain me being there? Reece’s mother left after Julia died.”

  He sighs and his jaw clenches. “Reece and I are in disagreement about that. Reece wants to tell the truth, but I think we should keep it to ourselves. History has proven that authority exploits opportunities, sometimes with detrimental consequences.”

  “Like me with the UR and Deacon.”

  His voice hardens. “I won’t put you in that position again. I want to try another plan.” He pauses and looks in the rearview mirror. “I trust Jo. She’s proved that she will protect you. Has protected you. I want to scope out the compound, figure out the best way for Reece and me to get in, then hide you and Jo up somewhere. Like in Kansas City.”

  I want to protest, but I have to agree it’s a good plan. Even if I can’t stand the thought of being apart from him. “How long will you be gone?”

  “I don’t know. A few days. A couple of weeks.”

  Disappointment and dismay fill my head. “A couple of weeks?”

  “I won’t leave you any longer than I have to.”

  “I know.” I turn my hand over, our palms touching, and lace our fingers. “You really think you can take me home?”

  “Yes. I won’t rest until I know that you’re safe.”

  I turn to face him. Pain shoots through my neck and I wince, but I want to see his face when I ask him this. “Are you still going with me?”

  A soft grin spreads across his face. “I will never let you go, Jules. Wherever you go, I’ll follow. You’re my life.”

  I love him. In spite of everything, there’s no place I’d rather be than with him. Even if I have to cross a million universes. “Will we have to go back to Springfield?”

  He hesitates. “I don’t know.”

  I glance at Jo, then Evan. “I want to take Jo with us.”

  He turns to me in surprise.

  “She has no one, Evan. I won’t leave her behind. I can’t spend the rest of my life wondering if she’s okay.”

  He smiles, his eyes full of pride. “That’s one of the reasons I love you so much.”

  “So that’s a yes?”

  He squeezes my hand. “You don’t even have to ask, Jules. Of course.”

  Reece shifts in his seat and stretches as he wakes up, looking around. If he’s heard our conversation, he doesn’t let on. “Where are we?”

  Evan glances over his shoulder. “From what I can tell we’re several hours away. It was slower going over the last stretch.”

  A half an hour later we stop to refuel the jeep. I get out and to stretch my legs. The throbbing in my arm and neck overshadow my stiff ankle.

  The land is still more barren than my world, but there’s more plant life out west. “I can’t believe all of the trees out here.”

  Evan looks up from the map. “I’ve been seeing more and more of them the last couple of hours or so.”

  “Why doesn’t anyone else back in the Midwest know about this?”

  Jo hands me some crackers she’s gotten out of the back of the jeep. “Because the rebels don’t like visitors. And they make sure that people don’t visit and talk about it. Otherwise there’d be a mass exodus.”

  “That’s just so… wrong.”

  She shrugs. “Right or wrong, it is what it is.” Pausing, she holds my gaze. “Are you sure you want to do this? People have been known to get killed for showing up at the walls of their compound.”

  “Reece is sure his mother is there.”

  “Let’s hope for all of our sakes that she is.”

  While I selfishly want Jo to stay with us, it occurs to me that we could be taking her into a dangerous situation. “Jo, you don’t have to come with us.”

  She winks. “And miss out on all the fun? No way. You’re like a storm, leaving chaos and destruction everywhere you go. I can’t miss the show.”

  As she wanders off, I ponder her words. Even though she’s teasing, she’s right. I do leave chaos wherever I go. Before I can consider the implications, Reece announces it’s time to go. Now that we’re this close to his mother, he’s antsy to reach her.

  Evan and Reece discuss their plan to spend a day watching the compound and finding a place for Jo and me to hide. Jo is surprisingly tightlipped about not going to the compound with the boys. After all of her warnings about the dangers of showing up on their doorstep, I expected her to be more relieved.

  Soon a real dirt road appears and Reece drives west, through a thickening, live forest. Jo is in awe as she gawks at the giant trees. Birds soar through the air and we see wildlife at the edge of the woods.

  The jeep crests a hill and a large concrete block wall, several hundred feet wide, appears in the distance. Reece slows down. We stare in amazement of the size of the compound and in fear of what we’re about to face. He pulls to the side of the path and gets out with Evan on his heels. After a few seconds, they get back in.

  Evan leans over the seat. “We’re going to drive the jeep off the path and see if we can hide it somewhere, then climb up there.” He points to the rocky cliffs next to us. “We want to watch a few vehicles go in and out, and see what type of security they have.”

  “Good idea,” Jo says.

  Reece maneuvers the jeep between several trees and parks on the other side of a pile of boulders that have fallen down the hill. The four of us stand next to the dirt road, staring at the partially hidden jeep.

  “There’s no other place to hide it here.” Reece says, frowning. “And this is a perfect vantage point.”

  Evan runs a hand over his head. “Chances are that no one will come by while we’re here. But to be on the safe side, we can post two people to guard the jeep and the other two of us go up to watch.”

  We consider who should stay behind.

  After my experience last night, I’m nervous to stay behind. But it’s not realistic to think I can climb a rocky path with my ankle, and I won’t be by myself. I need to get over it. “So the question is who’s going to stay with me.”

  Reece and Evan study each other.

  “I’ll stay with her,” Jo vol
unteers. “You two are the ones going to the compound. It makes sense that you observe it.”

  Reece looks uncertain. “You’re the one with the experience out here. It might be a good idea if you check it out too.”

  “I’ll stay with Jules.” Evan takes a step toward me. “I don’t feel comfortable leaving her anyway. If you think there’s something I should see, one of you guys can come down and trade places with me.”

  Jo nods, but I’ve gotten better at reading her. The stoic expression on her face suggests she doesn’t like our plan. As the boys wander back to the jeep to get Reece’s pack out, Jo lingers by me.

  “Spit it out,” I say. “You’re not happy about something.”

  Surprise flickers in her eyes, then she shakes her head. “No, I’m just nervous this close to the rebels.”

  I’m not sure I believe her but hate to press the issue.

  We get our bags as well as water and meal pouches. Jo and Reece head up the hill, and Evan and I decide to check out the area around the jeep.

  Our search reveals nothing other than live trees and plant life, as well as a few birds and squirrels. Evan watches the animals with excitement in his eyes.

  Watching him, I realize he’s seeing these things in his universe for the first time. I took so much for granted in my world. “Did you go to the zoo while you were in my universe?” Springfield’s zoo isn’t huge but it does have a few exotic animals.

  Evan leans his back against a tree and pulls me to his chest, wrapping his arms around my waist. “No. I didn’t have time.”

  His news doesn’t surprise me, considering everything else he did while he was in my universe. It’s a wonder he had time to sleep.

  I rest my head on his chest. “I’ll take you to the zoo in St. Louis when we get back to my world. You’ll love it. And the botanical gardens too.”

  “I’d like that. As long as I’m with you.” His hand rubs slow circles on back, and I relax into him more.

  “I think you and Reece are right,” I say and his hand pauses. “I think it’s a good idea for me to stay behind with Jo while you go to the compound, but I’m going to worry if you two are okay. I wish there was a way to communicate with you.”

  “I wish there was too, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I possibly can.” He carefully tilts my head so that I’m looking into his face. “You have to trust I won’t leave you a second longer than I have to. After what happened to you last night...” His eyes sink closed and he exhales before opening them again. “I don’t want to leave you at all. You have to know that.”