~*~
When we closed the center, Gloria tried to get me to go to Dennis and make amends. I told her that it was up to him this time. I went to him the first time we broke up, but I wasn’t going to be the one to make the first step this time. I’d done my part and cut ties with Carl. Now Dennis needed to do his part and decide if he was going to trust me or not. I wasn’t sure how long I’d hold out, but I really needed Dennis to come to me this time.
I also asked Gloria not to tell Dennis about Carl. I didn’t want him coming to me after he heard what I’d done. He needed to come to me because he couldn’t live without me, not because of some concession I made for us. And Rachael was right: he did need to apologize.
I got home and had just made my way to the kitchen, desperate for a glass of wine—or bottle—when my phone buzzed. “What’s up, Terri?”
“I hate to ask this, but can you come over and watch the kids? The hospital is short-handed, and I’ve been called into work. Mark isn’t home from his meeting yet. I can bring them to you if you prefer.”
“No, I’ll come over there.” I looked at the bottle of wine I wanted to get lost in and sighed. “It’s better for the kids that way.”
“If you’re busy . . .”
“No, no. The wine can wait. I’ll be right there.”
I did love spending time with the kids. I’d missed it since I moved out. We would still see each other every day at the center, but it just wasn’t the same. I would only get to see Trevor a little bit before and after school, and Sally was too busy with all the other kids during the day to care if she saw me or not. She would run to me when she was upset, but the fun times were reserved for toys and friends.
My mind wandered back to the conversation with Deb and Dennis about whether or not I would be a good mother. Rachael had said that Gloria believed I would be, and Terri trusted me with her kids. Trevor and Sally didn’t seem to mind having me around, and the kids at the center hadn’t complained yet. I knew none of that compared to what having your own child would be like, but it made me a little more positive about it all.
“Aunt D?” Trevor came up and sat next to me on the sofa. “Did you like your surprise?”
“My surprise?” I started searching my mind for any clue as to what he was talking about. If he’d given me a surprise, and I didn’t notice, it would crush him.
“Yeah, the one Uncle D was going to give you. I kept waiting for him to give it to you when we went for pizza, but he never did.”
The night Terri wore her red boots, Trevor did tell me he was excited to see me because he knew a secret I couldn’t know yet. “Oh, that surprise. I don’t think he’s given it to me yet.”
Trevor seemed disappointed and then grinned. “Can I check?”
Thinking he knew where it was hidden, I started looking around. “Um, what do you want to check?”
“Your keychain.”
I gave him a funny look and leaned over to grab my purse. I pulled out my keys and looked at them before handing them over. “I’m not sure what you’re looking for, but I don’t have a new keychain.”
He looked at each key, and then asked me what all of them were for. As we got to the last one, he was disappointed when I told him it was to a storage room at the center. He handed them back to me with a frown. “He hasn’t given it to you yet.”
“I told you I didn’t think . . . Wait, he’s giving me a key?”
Trevor’s eyes got big. “Don’t tell him I told you, okay? Act really surprised when you get it.” Trevor finally started smiling when I smiled. “Do you like your surprise?”
I held his hand and squeezed. “Yes, Trevor, I love it.” I didn’t have the heart to tell him I may not get the surprise.
“They said it would make you happy.” He stood up to go play again and looked at me with his head tilted. “Will you show it to me? I want to know what’s so great about this key.”
“I’m sure it’s just a normal-looking key, but it means he really likes me.”
Trevor scrunched up his face. “That’s dumb. Why doesn’t he give you flowers or something?” He ran off to play before I could answer him. I wouldn’t have known what to say anyway.
Terri had fed the kids before I got there, so all that was really left to do was give them their baths and put them to bed. Sally was on the downhill side of her bath when Mark finally got home. He’d never had a meeting last that long, and I hoped everything was okay. I got Sally out and quickly dried her off before taking her to her room for pajamas. I knew that if she heard Mark she wouldn’t cooperate with me.
I heard Mark coming up the stairs with Trevor just as I finished with Sally. Just as I suspected, the second she heard his voice, she wanted to get down. Mark came in and, of course, showered her with attention. I shook my head and backed away.
Mark turned to me and smiled. “Thanks for your help tonight. I’ve got it now. Go home if you want.”
“I can stay until Trevor has his bath.”
Mark leaned down and kissed my cheek. “Go home and lock up when you leave. The kids and I are fine.” He put Sally on his shoulders and told Trevor to say good night.
I wanted to stay, not because I thought Mark couldn’t handle it, but because I didn’t want to be on my own. The apartment seemed like a great idea when I started dating again, but now it was just lonely. I bent down to kiss Trevor and told him what a great help he was and promised him one more time that I wouldn’t tell Uncle D that I knew about the surprise before heading downstairs.
I stopped on the third step from the bottom when I saw Dennis sitting in the chair. I wasn’t sure if he heard me or felt me staring at him, but he turned around. I was hoping for a smile, but I didn’t get it. At least he stood and acknowledged my presence. “Drew, how are you?”
“I’m fine. How are you?” I came down the last three steps.
“Listen, I didn’t know you were going to be here when I agreed to drive Mark home.”
“Well, I just came down for my purse.” I could have killed Mark for not warning me. “I’ll be out in no time.”
“Drew?” I turned around hoping that he was going to talk to me and say that he was sorry. I was disappointed when he pointed to my keys on the coffee table.
“Oh, thanks.” I walked by him and tried to not breathe. I didn’t want to smell him. I already knew how great he smelled, and being reminded was not going to help me keep my composure until I could get to the car.
I picked up my keys and walked by Dennis again on the way to the door. I forgot to exhale as I walked by him and caught the scent of his cologne. My eyes started watering, so I concentrated on the keys as I walked to the door. I put one hand on the doorknob and the other against the wall as I started sobbing. There was a shiny new key that hadn’t been there thirty minutes before.
Dennis put his hand on my shaking shoulder and pulled me to him. I dropped my purse and keys and jumped in his arms, wrapping my legs around him. I wasn’t letting go any time soon. I cried in the crook of his neck while he rubbed my back.
“I was afraid you weren’t going to see it before you left. I didn’t expect you to cry, though.” He held me tighter as I sobbed with relief that he still wanted me. “I’m so sorry, Drew. Please forgive me.”
I didn’t get down, but I did pull back a little to look in his eyes. “I love you, Dennis.”
He smiled and pressed me up against the wall. “I already knew that, but it’s about time you said it.” He kissed me and pressed into me a little more. I wished we were anywhere but Terri and Mark’s entryway. “I love you, Drew.”
I was so lost in Dennis’s eyes and smile that I didn’t see anyone come into the entryway. I heard my keys, but it still didn’t register that we weren’t alone until I heard Trevor whine. “That’s it?” I quickly released my legs from around Dennis to kneel down in front of Trevor. He looked as if he wanted to cry. “I thought it would be something special, but this is just a stupid key.” He turned to Dennis to glare at him.
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“I’m sorry, buddy. Next time I pick out a surprise for Drew, I’ll take you with me to help me pick it out.” I loved how Dennis didn’t get offended or start talking down to Trevor. Trevor was just a child who was obviously beyond ready for bed.
I grabbed Trevor’s hips and gave him a small shake to look at me. “Hey. It’s good, Trevor. Really, I love it.”
Trevor whispered as if Dennis couldn’t hear him. “He could have at least got a blue one. That’s your favorite color.”
I whispered back. “We’ll work on him. You and me, we’ll teach him about good surprises.”
Trevor finally smiled and nodded his head before running back upstairs. We heard him yell to Mark, “It’s not even blue!”
Dennis and I laughed until we looked at each other. Suddenly things didn’t seem so funny anymore. I was always attracted to Dennis, but for some reason the look in his eyes took my breath away. I cleared my throat. “I think we should get out of here.”
Dennis bent down and picked up my purse and keys. I guess he didn’t need any coaxing. “I like how you think.”
I didn’t live that far from Terri and Mark, but the drive seemed to take forever. I wanted to be with Dennis, not in two separate cars. I kept looking in the rearview mirror to make sure he was still following me. We both quickly parked the cars and quietly made our way up to my apartment. The second the door was closed, we attacked each other. I knew we needed to talk, but, right then, talking was the last thing on my mind.
We each went for the other’s pants first. We could do what we wanted with our shirts on. I unfastened his belt and loosened the opening of his slacks enough to get my hand inside. We had only been away from each other for a little over a week this time, but it had been harder to be away from him because I’d had him every day since we’d last made up—sometimes a couple of times a day.
He groaned in my mouth. “Drew, two can,” he put his hand inside my jeans, “play that game.”
“Oh.” I closed my eyes. “Okay.” I reluctantly removed my hand from his pants. “We aren’t . . .” Even though I had stopped, Dennis picked up his pace. I placed my forehead on his chest and gripped his shirt.
Dennis sounded amused. “We aren’t what, Drew?”
I was breathless by this point. “Teenagers.” I started to breathe a little heavier and gripped his shirt a little tighter. “We should be able to . . . Oh, God.”
Dennis leaned down and whispered in my ear. His breath tickled my neck, adding to the sensation. “We should be able to do what?”
“Wait. We should be able to wait.” I started rocking on his hand.
“Do you want to wait, Drew?” He asked the question, but didn’t give me time to answer before he pushed me over the edge. I flung my head back, clutching his shirt so hard that I thought I would rip it off, and hoped the neighbors didn’t complain about the noise I was making.
My body was trembling, and I couldn’t hold on to Dennis any longer. I fell back onto the sofa, completely out of breath. I’d missed that man. I looked up at the satisfied look on his face. He was proud of himself. I was proud of him, too, but I wasn’t going to let him off the hook that easily. What did he say earlier? Two can play that game. I managed to lift my arm and curl my finger, letting him know I wanted him closer.
“Oh, I’m not done with you yet.” Dennis walked closer, still very proud of the enormous orgasm he’d just given me with my clothes on. “Don’t get all sleepy on me now. It’s going to be a long night for—”
I sat up quickly and pulled his slacks and boxers down in one swoop, catching him off guard. He may not have been as fully dressed as I was, but I was determined to make him inform the neighbors of my talents as well.
I had just wrapped my hand around him and leaned forward when he pulled me to my feet. “Not yet. You know I can’t last when you do that.”
I smiled. “That was the point.” I kissed him and turned us around so that his back was to the sofa. Then I pushed. He sat with his pants around his knees. I leaned down and placed a hand on the back of the sofa on each side of his head. “Just sit still. I want to drive you crazy tonight.” I kissed him briefly and stood up to undress.
“You drive me crazy every day.” He sat and watched as I slowly undressed.
I was pretty sure he wished he had taken me up on my previous offer by the time I was finished. I put my left foot on the edge of the sofa and gave him a more up close and personal show. He leaned forward, but I put my hand on his head to prevent him from coming closer. I repeated the words he said to me. “Not yet.”
I turned around and bent over in front of him to pull the coffee table closer to us. I gripped the edge when I felt him kiss me. I closed my eyes and pushed back a little, encouraging him to continue. I shouldn’t have, but it felt so good. I didn’t want him to stop. I forced myself to stand up and take a deep breath. I was supposed to be driving him crazy for once. I turned and looked at him, raising my eyebrows.
“What? You didn’t like that?” The sexy smirk he wore was making me crave him all the more.
“You know I love it when you do that.” I leaned down and kissed him. “But this is my turn to drive you crazy.”
I straddled his lap and sat down a few inches from where I knew he wanted me to be. I took the hem of his shirt and started to tug up. He leaned forward to help me take it off the rest of the way. I loved running my hands over his chest. I leaned forward and kissed his neck. I felt his hands grip my hips and try to pull me to him. I covered his hands with mine and sat up.
“Please, let me do this.”
Dennis slowly looked up and down at the sight in front of him and came back up to my eyes. “I’ll try to hold out as long as possible, but I can’t make any guarantees.”
I smiled and put my hands back on his chest, leaning forward again to kiss his neck. I knew when things were getting intense for Dennis because his grip was getting tighter on my hips. I didn’t even care if he left bruises. I loved driving him crazy. I just didn’t know how much longer I could hold out, either.
I slowly inched my way down his lap, getting closer to what I’d wanted since walking into my apartment. I could tell he was growing impatient as his fingers clawed at my hips, trying to get me closer to him. I reached down and wrapped my hand around him again, making sure he was ready because I knew I was. I put my forehead to his and looked into his eyes as I slowly sank down, taking everything I could. We sat like that for a moment, just breathing, taking it all in.
Then I started to move in slow, steady circles with my hips, and his head fell back. I leaned forward and placed my chest against his, loving the feel of him next to me. With my breasts against his chest and my forehead on his shoulder, I started to move a little faster. He pulled his head up and kissed my neck, whispering that he loved me over and over.
Sitting up straight, I placed my hands on his shoulders and started to grind harder. I needed the buildup that was starting. Dennis wrapped his arms around me and bent down, taking my right breast into his mouth. The buildup was threatening to explode, but I wasn’t finished yet. I pushed on his shoulders to get him to release my breast. I kissed him hard as soon as he did.
I whispered in his ear, “Hold on to me.”
Dennis looked a little confused until I leaned all the way back, lying on the coffee table I had pulled up to us. I looked up at him, begging him to take over as he’d wanted to not so long ago. He took the hint, and I closed my eyes as he gripped my hips. The first thrust took me by surprise and almost sent me over the edge, but I put my hands above my head and hung on to the coffee table. When I knew I could handle the sight of seeing him have his way with me, I finally opened my eyes.
Our eyes met and locked on each other. It felt as if he could see inside my soul, see the darkness I’d lived with, and see the light I’d yet to find. I knew in that moment I could find that light with him.
I arched my back as the orgasm ripped through my body with pleasure and pain. Dennis stood up,
holding my body, and moved me to the sofa. He took on a new intensity whenever he witnessed my body responding to his, but I didn’t think I could take much more than he’d already given me that night.
I gripped his arms and loved feeling the tightness in his muscles as he used his strength to thrust me toward him by my hips. I felt another buildup, one I wasn’t sure I’d survive. He let go with one hand to move it to my lower belly. Splaying his hand across me, he brushed his thumb against me, and I started chanting his name. I couldn’t hold out much longer. He added more pressure with the slow circles his thumb was making, and I started screaming for the second time that night. I was just glad Dennis joined in with me this time.
Dennis collapsed on top of me, desperately sucking air into his lungs. He could barely speak, but managed to whisper, “I fucking love you.” I smiled. It may be messed up and not very romantic to some, but for me, that was the sweetest thing he’d ever said to me.
~*~
I slapped the coffee table, trying to find my phone in the dark. I wasn’t sure what time it was, but I was exhausted and I could tell from the breathing under me that Dennis was wiped out, too. I finally found my phone and answered quickly so it didn’t wake up Dennis. “Hello?”
“Are you already in bed?” Terri was shocked since we are both night owls.
“We never made it to the bedroom. Hang on a sec.” I put the phone down to put Dennis’s shirt on. I tried to smooth out the wrinkles I made on it and quickly gave up. I covered him with the throw and kissed his cheek. “I’m back.” I made my way to my bedroom and sat on the bed.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know he was staying over.”
“No, it’s okay. He’s still asleep on the sofa. I can talk.”
“I didn’t get to talk to you much, and I wanted to thank you again for your help with the kids tonight.”
“You know I love spending time with them.” There was an awkward silence. There’s never an awkward silence with Terri. “Terri, what’s wrong?”
Striving for Normal (Striving Series) Page 20
