Black Number Four

by Kandi Steiner

  Kip smiles, lying down on the bed and pulling me up into his arms. “You have me,” he says quietly and I run the tip of my nose along his neck, settling in. Slowly, I trace my fingertips up and down his abdomen, making him shiver slightly each time I reach the lower end.

  “What are your dreams, Kip?” I ask, my fingers still lightly tracing. “What do you want most in life?”

  He lets out a long breath, his hand playing with my hair as he thinks. “If you asked me that a couple of months ago, I would have known exactly how to answer. But right now, I don’t know if I can give you an honest reply.”

  I look up at him, my chin resting on his chest. “Try.”

  He sighs, brushing the hair from my face. “Career-wise, I want to be a screenwriter. I want to move to California and go to UCLA. I want to graduate with honors and internships out the ass and I want to land my dream job writing for one of the big television stations, like FX or ABC or HBO.”

  I smile. “And life-wise?”

  His eyes are dark, the only room coming from the bathroom light he flicked on as we passed it on the way to the bed. For a moment he says nothing, like he’s afraid of the next words he’ll speak. But then his mouth opens, closes again, and finally, the words force their way out.

  “I’m beginning to think as long as you’re in it, I don’t really care what happens anymore.”

  My heart swells at his words and I feel his heartbeat quicken in his chest as he swallows, his eyes still searching mine. After a moment, he clears his throat.

  “What about you? What are your dreams?”

  I furrow my brows, unsure just as much as he was minutes before. “I feel like, with school, I bounce around trying to figure out what I want to do, but nothing ever really clicks.” I pause, figuring out what to say next. “Nothing except for poker. I just… I get poker. Poker gets me.” I lean up, resting on my elbow so I can look at Kip. He waits patiently for me to finish and I can’t put into words how much it means to me. “I think I might want to own my own casino company.”

  Kip’s brows shoot up and he leans up on the pillows, pulling me closer. “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, I think so. Not like a real casino or anything, but like those party companies where you can hire casino people for your event. You know, fake money that people trade in for raffle tickets or donations to charity and stuff. I’ve seen them at a few sorority events and I really think I could do it. I think I could be amazing at it. And then I wouldn’t ever have to give up what I really love.” I pause, shaking my head a little. “It’s stupid, isn’t it?”

  “What?” Kip laughs. “No, it’s not stupid. Why would you think that?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know, because it’s not traditional. It’s not a lawyer or a doctor or whatever else makes people say ‘Oh, you’ve really got a great dream there.’”

  “Do you think me wanting to be a screenwriter is stupid?”

  My eyes go wide. “No! Your dream is amazing! I wish I had your talent.”

  “And I wish I had yours,” he says, swallowing hard. For some reason, it feels like there’s still something he’s not telling me – like there are words right on the tip of his tongue that just won’t quite fall out. “Not every dream has to follow some sort of formula that society thought up, Skyler. The reason not many people have the same dream as you is that none of them have the same talent and drive. You’re unique. You’re special. You’re not meant to fit in some sort of box.”

  I lie back down on his chest, letting his fingers running through my hair soothe me until my eyes close.

  “What about playing for a living?” He asks. “You could make a killing, Skyler.”

  I shake my head. “That’s not what matters to me. I want to win this tournament in May for me and for my family. They would be set, I would have enough to pay for the rest of school and start my company, but I wouldn’t have the lifestyle that goes along with being a lifelong player. I don’t want the travel, the media, the pressure. I just want to play and have fun. And if I can make a living off of that? Well, that would be perfect.” I contemplate that word and shake my head again. “Almost perfect.”

  “And what would make it perfect-perfect?” Kip asks, smiling.

  I shrug, hesitant just like he was. “Maybe a blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy with glasses,” I say, climbing up to straddle him. I pull his lips close to mine, and just before closing the distance, I whisper, “Maybe that.”

  My lips find his in a frenzy, but he slows me, moving in a slow rhythm until I finally match it. At the touch of his lips, my entire body comes to life, the electricity from his touch running through me in steady currents.

  I find his belt and pull at it, freeing one of the clasps. Kip grabs my hand, cursing under his breath. “I don’t want to take advantage of you, Skyler. You’ve been drinking. A lot.”

  I shake my head, laughing as I kiss him again. “Drunk as a freshman with a fake ID or sober as the day I was born, I want you, Kip. Please.” I rock my hips against him and he groans, his grip on my wrists tightening as he fights his urge. “Give me what I want.”

  His hands free my wrists and I undo his belt quickly before he bucks his hips up enough to slide his jeans down, kicking them off the rest of the way. I’m only wearing a scrap of a thong under the t-shirt he put me in and I can’t wait any longer. The ache in my stomach for him to fill me is consuming, driving every thought, every movement. As soon as he pulls free from his boxers, I slide my panties to the side and come down on top of him in one fluid motion. Kip’s eyes roll to the back of his head and we moan together, the pure ecstasy of him inside me controlling both of us.

  I ride him slow and steady at first, my hands weaved into his hair and my mouth hard on his. Each time I come down against him, he bucks his hips, meeting me in the middle and causing a friction right where I need it. My moans grow louder and I bite my finger, not sure if any of the girls are home in the next room.

  “I love the noises you make for me, Skyler,” Kip breathes, running his hands up my thighs to the small of my back. He helps me ride, pumping into me harder and faster until it’s too much and I feel myself start to come apart. I can’t hold it any longer, I’m too eager for the burning numbness to destroy me.

  “Oh my God,” I breathe, moving my hips faster. “I’m coming.” My breath leaves my chest, expelling itself and leaving me to fight for air as the waves of my orgasm crash over me, wave after wave. Kip growls, biting my lip as I moan into his mouth and I feel him release inside me. We come together, each of us falling apart at the seams while being stitched together. Loud colors invade my mind and by the time we finish, I’m shaking uncontrollably, breathless. Hopeless. Completely caught up.

  For a moment we just lay there, him still inside me and our foreheads pressed together as our breaths steady out. Slowly, I move off him and pull the covers up over both of us. I find my place on his chest again and my already heavy eyelids stop fighting to stay open. Just before I fall asleep, I feel words coming from my mouth. I’m not sure if I control them, but I don’t disagree with them, either.

  “Don’t leave me, Kip. You can’t leave me now. You can’t hurt me now. You can’t. Please, tell me you won’t hurt me. Promise me.” The words fall out of my mouth quickly before they start to slowly fade, my mouth too tired to say anything else. The alcohol mixed with the exhaustion from today and the calming of my orgasm lull me closer to my dreams. I feel Kip swallow hard but he pulls me tighter, planting a soft kiss on my forehead. Just before I fade out, he whispers.

  “I promise.”

  When my eyes flutter open, I’m greeted with my Little’s piercing green eyes. She’s smiling and slowly shaking her head.

  “You’ve been cuddling with me all night.”

  I groan, my hand finding my forehead as I lean up on one elbow. “I have?”

  She laughs, nodding. “I didn’t realize you liked to be big spoon.”

  My head is pounding, so I try not to laugh but fail. Glancing to the lef
t, I spot two small pills and one of the plastic cups from the bathroom full of water. There’s a note on a napkin just next to the cup with a large circle and a small line of script in the middle of it.

  I smile, remembering our conversation from last night before reaching for the pills and chasing them down with the water.

  “So, you and Kip, huh?” Cassie asks. I nod, still smiling at the note. “You definitely caused quite the scene last night.”

  I shrug, not really caring anymore. “Well, people will get over it. I’ll only be the topic of conversation for a few days, I’m sure.”

  “Have you talked to Ex yet?”

  I frown, my stomach sinking a little. “No, why? Is she okay? She seemed fine last night.”

  “I’m sure she’s good,” she says, but I can tell there’s something she’s not telling me. “I just think maybe you should have told her before everyone else found out. There were a lot of eyes on her when you kissed him, too.”

  Ugh, I didn’t even think about that.

  “You’re right,” I groan. “I’ll talk to her after the tournament. Things have been so weird between us all semester… I just want things back to normal.”

  Cassie smiles. “It’ll all work itself out, Big. Don’t worry about it today. You ready for this thing?” She throws back the covers and slowly moves over to the closet, sifting through it as I massage my temples.

  “Yeah,” I say confidently, which is surprising considering how hungover I am. But, even so, my focus is locked in. I’m going to win this tournament today. No doubts, no other possibilities – I will win. “What are your plans?”

  Cassie pulls a long, black and white chevron maxi dress over the light blue bikini she’s slipped on and fusses with her hair in the mirror. “I think we’re just going to lounge by the pool for most of the day since we’re at sea. There are supposed to be some fun games up on the deck and I’m sure the frat boys will make it interesting.”

  I laugh. “That is a definite. You should stop by for the final round of the tournament. It’ll probably be around seven or so.”

  “I love how you don’t even question if you’ll be at the final table. You just know,” she observes, her brows raised. “You’re such a bad ass, Big.”

  “I’m just ready,” I correct her, smiling. “And when I’m ready, no one can take me down. No one can beat me.”

  There’s a knock at our door just as Cassie finishes packing up her pool bag. She swings it open, revealing Kip in nothing but a pair of red board shorts and Ray Bans.

  Cue mouth watering.

  “Well, I guess I don’t need to wish you good luck then,” Little says, winking back at me before excusing herself. She smiles at Kip as she scoots past him and he gives her a slight head nod before making his way inside.

  “Good morning, beautiful,” he says and my stomach flutters at his words. He holds out a can of Red Bull and I exhale a long breath.

  “You’re a life saver,” I say, popping open the can and drinking half of it in one gulp. Kip eyes me, smiling.

  “You ready to go?”

  I pull my hoodie on and check myself in the mirror. The make-up is from last night, but I’ll be wearing sunglasses, so I’m not that worried about it. Everyone will be outside while I play today, anyway.

  “Yep, let’s do this.”

  We make our way to the seventh deck, making a pit stop for mimosas on our way to the casino. As we walk, Kip holds my hand in his and I can’t help but feel exhilarated at the touch. There’s no more hiding, no more games – it’s just me and him.

  “You don’t need to sit in here and watch me all day,” I say, pulling him to a stop just outside the casino. “Go hang out on the deck and enjoy the weather. It’s too pretty to be stuck inside.”

  He smiles, his blue eyes even brighter against his tan skin. “I want to watch you play. I promised a game of water basketball with the guys this morning but then I’m coming back and I’m all yours.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  He cuts me off. “Again, I want to. Besides, we still have tomorrow in Key West before we head back to the port.”

  I nod. “Okay, but if you get bored just go outside. It’s not a big deal.”

  Kip laughs. “Are you trying to get rid of me?”

  “What?” I blanch. “No, I just –”

  “I’m joking.” He cuts me off, pressing his lips to mine and effectively taking the breath I needed to finish the sentence. When he pulls back, he eyes me curiously for a second before asking, “What’s my lucky number?”

  I scrunch my nose. “Huh?”

  “The formula that your dad uses, do you know it?”

  “Oh, yeah I know it.”

  “Well,” he chuckles again. “What’s my lucky number?”

  I smile. “When is your birthday?”

  “April 6th, 1993.”

  “Okay, so you do the number of the month plus the date plus the last two of the year. That would be four plus six which is ten. Then add nine, nineteen. Then three, twenty-two. Then you add those two together so two plus two is…” I falter, my eyes growing wide again as I meet his.

  “Four.”

  “Four,” I breathe, repeating him. “Holy crap, maybe that’s why it worked at Roulette. Maybe four is luckier for you than it is for me.”

  “What happened to me being your good luck charm?”

  I laugh. “Well, it’s all messed up now! I think you’re stealing my luck!” I shove him away and hold up my two index fingers in an “X”. “Stay back, luck-stealer.”

  Kip bites his lip, smiling as he pulls me close to him again. “What if I’m giving you my luck? Ever think of it that way?” I swallow hard, my head going fuzzy with his body pressed against mine. “Maybe I should give you my luck all night tonight and every night from now until the tournament in May. You know, just in case.” He licks his lips, his eyes challenging as I try desperately to swallow again but find nothing left to do it.

  An announcement calling all tournament entries rings out from the casino, breaking my trance. I lift up on my toes to kiss Kip one last time. “Well if that’s the way it works, you better wish me luck before I head in.”

  He smiles against my lips and pulls me in closer, his tongue snaking its way inside my mouth. Kip kisses me hard, his hands in my hair and mine shaking against the bare flesh of his abdomen as his tongue works with mine. When he pulls back, I’m breathless, my head no longer focused on a card game.

  “Feeling lucky?” He asks, grinning.

  “Among other things.”

  Kip laughs, pecking me once more before freeing me from his grasp. “Go kick their asses so we can celebrate tonight.”

  “Deal.” I wink before turning toward the casino.

  “And don’t cheat our lucky number! Have faith in it!” He calls after me. I look back and smile, offering a small wave as my stomach flips. I hate to admit it, I never get this way over a guy, but I’m totally swooning. Because he just said our lucky number. Not mine, not his – ours.

  I really love the sound of that.

  I just went all in on a pair of fours. At the final table. With only one other person left.

  I think I’m officially crazy.

  My eyes find Kip in the crowd and I smile, trying to appear confident even though I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little worried. He’s standing with all the girls, Bear, and Adam. They’re the only ones who showed up for the final table, but really the only ones I care about being there, anyway.

  My palms are sweating, so I wipe them gently along the outside stitch of my jeans. I shouldn’t be taking this risk, but when I was dealt the pair, I couldn’t help but hear Kip’s words in my ear.

  Have faith in our number.

  Philip, my final opponent, calls. He pushes his chips forward and we flip over our cards. I can almost hear the laughter from those around us at my pair of fours, especially matched up against Philip’s hand. He’s got a Queen, King suited and there’s a Queen and King
on the table already. With only two cards left to be dealt, there’s a slim chance things will work out for me.

  But I have faith.

  Philip is an older guy from Germany. He’s one of the pros and this isn’t the first time we’ve sat at a table together. The last time I played him, he beat me out of the last seat at the final table in a Nashville tournament. Now, he’s eying the table with a fat smirk on his face and I’m silently praying the cards will turn in my favor so I can smack it right off.

  If he wins this hand, I’d still be in, but not with enough chips to do much. But, if I win, he’s out. Staring down at my four of hearts and four of diamonds, I can’t help but laugh.

  Come on, black number four.

  The dealer burns a card and then deals the turn, revealing a nine of hearts. No help for either of us. I let out a shaky breath and lock my eyes on Kip’s, refusing to watch as the river is dealt. He smiles, letting me use him as a distraction. I hear the flip of the card and I fight the urge to close my eyes, keeping them trained on Kip. When his move to the table, his mouth drops and I can’t keep focus anymore. I look, too.

  Holy shit.

  Four of spades.

  Black number four.

  Three of a kind.

  The whole room claps and cheers but at a very polite volume as I shake hands with Philip. I can barely keep myself from screaming. I won. Holy shit, I won!

  I shake hands with a few more people, the head of the casino and a few pit bosses before finally being presented with a large check. We smile for a few photos and once the flashes clear, I turn to find Kip again. But when I do, I falter, eying him curiously.

  Erin is saying something to him and his face looks worried, his brows furrowed and his mouth pressed into a hard line. When he glances up at me, his eyes are cold, his chest moving quickly with heavy breaths. My heart races under my ribs as my eyes move between him and Erin, a tingling numbness spreading its way into my fingers.